Opening | Girls Chase

Opening

Your initial approach: how you first start talking to that girl you really like.

How to Pick Up Girls at the Mall

Tony Depp's picture

By: Tony Depp

pick up girls at the mall
Despite the stories about creeps harassing girls at malls, these female-rich locales are among the best places to meet women. Here’s how to do it right.

For the many years I’ve been teaching guys how to meet women in the daytime, I’d say that (other than the beach) there’s no better location than the mall. And I’ll admit, I’m a bit of an expert at picking up girls at the mall.

The main issue most men have with malls is that it’s not outside, so it feels different. It’s always like this: a guy who’s used to meeting girls at bars can’t do malls; a guy who’s used to streets can’t do malls, and so on. It’s something about the change from the comfortable to uncomfortable, familiar to unfamiliar environments that throws guys off.

That’s why, as a student looking to improve your game, you should put yourself into as many new situations, in as many different environments as possible. Then you're much less likely to get stuck when something unexpected happens.

For example: you spot a pretty girl walking in the mall, so you start to approach her, and she ducks into a clothing store. Oh, now you can’t approach her because she’s in a store, so you stand around outside scratching your nuts, waiting for her to come back out, feeling more and more creepy with every minute, and then just give up.

But if you’d taken the time to put yourself into a situation like this before, you’d be prepared when it inevitably happens again.

Not being able to approach a girl walking into a store at the mall is like not being able to meet women on the dance floor at the bar. Half the venue is useless to you, so you have half the opportunity to meet your dream girl.

Tactics Tuesdays: The 'Too Distracted' Opener

Chase Amante's picture
too distracted by you opener
A simple, fun, direct opener to use on girls who are stationary and alone. "I'm too distracted by you" puts the blame on HER for being too cute.

This is a little gem from the old mASF seduction forums (credit: Lifeguard).

It goes like this: you're out somewhere and see a pretty girl, so you approach, give your name, tell her she distracted you with her cuteness, and ask her name.

Example:

You're in the café and see a girl. You approach her and tell her, "Hi, I'm Lucas. I was sitting over there trying to read my book but I am too distracted by how cute you are. What's your name?"

This opener combines direct with situational relevance, so it's to-the-point but still grounded.

It's also versatile (useful in a lot of different situations), as we'll see just below.

Tactics Tuesdays: Zero Small Talk Flirtation

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

zero small talk
Don’t get stuck in boring go-nowhere conversations with girls. Ditch the small talk, and flirt with ‘small talk zero’ instead.

This is for any guy who runs into this issue:

You're in a situation, start to talk to a girl, make small talk about the setting/situation, then get trapped in a platonic conversation where you talk about boring situational things that neither you nor the girl care about. She loses interest and slips away.

If this happens to you, there's an easy tactic you can use, and that is to go 'small talk zero'. Instead of make small talk, your entire early conversation consists of flirtatious banter.

Sometimes you can make small talk work perfectly fine, especially if you are confident in how you do it and don't spend too long on it. However, if you're nervous, or don't feel in control of the situation, it's easy to fall into a small talk loop, where small talk leads to more small talk, which leads to boredom, and women leaving.

Since we don't want attractive women leaving, instead of getting trapped in an endless small talk loop, we can use 'zero small talk' flirtation instead.

How to Get Dates with Girls from Groups and Events

Chase Amante's picture
get dates from groups and events
How do you meet a girl and get a date from a group or event... without standing around not knowing whom to talk to or what to do?

While I will always recommend you put cold approach (walking up to girls you don't know) first, you can excellently supplement the women you meet this way with girls you meet via groups and events.

If you are active enough socially, it can even be possible to make groups and events your primary channel to meet new women.

There are several benefits to getting your dates via events and group activities. The biggest is that women you meet this way are both more open to socializing, and less guarded. This typically means:

The interactions are also slower paced and less pressured, which means they aren't as 'do or die' as higher pressure street, bar, grocery, etc. approaches (or even class, office, or library approaches).

You have more time to make things happen in group and event situations; you don't need to move quite as fast, and the escalation windows don't close so quick. Attraction sticks around longer before expiring, too.

Below, we'll cover some tips and tactics to make getting dates from groups and events a breeze, and have a lot more fun at these places, too.

The Death of Approach Anxiety: A 10-Year Reflection (Video)

Hector Castillo's picture

I turn 27 years old tomorrow, but I have put multiple lifetimes of work into mastering the art of seduction. I have given it almost every second of my attention for the past 10 years. I have (literally) beat myself up learning the ins and outs of the female mind.

There are still some mysteries that remain for me, but they are few, and so I want to commemorate my 10-year journey with a video on the #1 problem that most men face when finding women they want to sleep with, date, marry, or even have children with.

Approach anxiety.

It is the BIGGEST problem that all men have.

I had it HORRIBLY in my teenage years.

Then, one day, for the most part, it turned off.

Of course, I'm human and still even encounter approach anxiety to this day, but what happened when I "woke up" is that the anxiety was overcome by something greater....

This is an ode to the death of approach anxiety. A death to that which keeps most of you from finding the girl(s) of your dreams.

4 Easy, Proven Ways to Start Talking to Women (or People)

Chase Amante's picture
start talking to women
Sometimes when you go out to meet girls, you're lazy. Or you're rusty. Or it's hard to get going. Use these 4 tactics to start talking to women with ease.

We've written a lot on here about approach anxiety in the past.

Approach anxiety of course is the trepidation you feel before you approach someone new.

See a pretty girl you'd like to talk to? You freeze up and feel fear before you can.

At a networking conference and need to make business contacts? Freeze up in fear.

Anxiety before an approach is a common human feeling. It is not only something that happens with approaching women. You'll feel it any time you need to make an approach where you care about the outcome. If you have to approach your boss to ask for a raise... or your teacher to ask for a chance to make up that test you failed... or a roommate you suspect has stolen something from you but you aren't sure.

If you care about the outcome, and need to approach and engage someone else, there will usually be some anxiety there. Because you'll worry "What if I approach, and this person won't give me what I want?"

The anxiety is there to force you to take a moment to consider how, exactly, to get the outcome you want.

Yet with women, especially in cold approach scenarios (where you're walking up to someone you do not know), you'll often only have a handful of seconds to make the approach. Fail to make it on time, and the girl is gone.

This article gives you four quick, simple little tactics you can use to get yourself to approach.

Note that these tactics are geared more toward intermediate and advanced playboys who are able to approach, and just need an extra push to get off the sidelines. If you struggle with heavy approach anxiety, skip to the section at the end (where I link up some material on dealing with that).

Assuming you're able to approach, however, and just need to up your consistency, then pick one (or more) of these, use it, and you'll kick off a bunch more conversations with women (or other people, if your approaching is for purposes other than dating).

The 30-Second Rule and Other Night Game Strategies

Tony Depp's picture

night game strategies
Guys often get approach anxiety because they don’t have a strategy: something to start and drive the interaction. So here are some proven night-game strategies for ya!

I used to have this fantasy, sort of like that Sonic Youth video where these two teenagers are staring longingly at each other across a mosh pit but the guy is too shy to approach. The mosh pit eventually bounces them serendipitously into each other.

Before I discovered pickup, I only went to bars to drink, see live bands, and hope that fate would push a hot, lonely, hipster girl into my lap. When I stepped into the mosh pit, I’d just get smashed around into some sweaty punk’s armpit. It wasn’t long before I realized the only dudes there getting laid were in the band.

Then I discovered the pickup community and all its politically incorrect but incredibly effective dating advice.

Out of all the concepts like teasing, negging, displaying higher value (DHV), and cold reads – I’d say the most useful advice is the three-second rule.

What’s the three-second rule?

  1. See a hot girl
  2. Approach her within three seconds (before your stupid brain talks you out of it)

The 3-second rule is great for newbies. But it’s not necessary for advanced guys. I prefer sniper-style game – analyzing my target, gathering data, and not moving until the situation provides maximum effectiveness or maximum results for the least amount of energy.

Advanced night gamers don’t have that annoying little voice that the 3-second rule overrides. We know how to shut it up, or at least ignore it.

The little voice sounds like this:

People will see you. You don’t know what to say. She looks like a bitch. Get a drink first. Maybe you should hit the gym for a month first. Check your Tinder. You can try again tomorrow.”

Do Pickup Lines Work on Women?

Darwin Niwrad's picture

Do pickup lines work on women
Do pickup lines work on women? Yes, but canned lines can backfire if you don’t know how and when to use them. Here’s how to make your lines work for you.

Pickup lines – can’t screw with them, can’t screw without them.

The first thing I want to address here is that you shouldn’t let anyone tell you that master seducers don’t use canned lines. Whether they’re technically pickup lines, stories, quips, jokes, whatever... everyone uses them. Because they work.

The important thing here is that it’s difficult to know what will work, when you should use lines, how you should use them, where you should use them, and on whom you should use them.

There are a plethora of pickup lines tailored for a plethora of female personalities and situations, so for women you just met, you’re likely just rolling the dice by using a pickup line. With experience, you simply gain the ability to make educated guesses.

Highly-skilled guys have the advantage of experience, which gives them a better idea of what to say to particular girls, and whether to use a canned line or craft something on the spot that’s more natural and unique.

And not only do you have to consider a line’s effect on particular girls, you also must understand what type of person you are to know what works well for your body language, attitude, and style.

14 “Anytime” Compliments to Use on Her Today

Hector Castillo's picture

how to compliment a girl
A good compliment goes a long way with women. But to give a good compliment and have it be effective can take a bit of know-how. Here’s everything you need.

I love to give a good compliment. It makes me happy to compliment girls, because if I’m not being brazenly honest with someone, I’m uncomfortable. I have to be like that.

Plus, it’s so beautifully polarizing to compliment women. It’s the epitome of strength, in my opinion.

All of that “oh, never compliment a girl, because you’ll make her think you’re just another loser who’s chasing her” nonsense is exactly that – nonsense.

Are there times when you shouldn’t compliment a girl? SURE.

If she’s being a snotty ho with her nose in the air? Don’t compliment her. She doesn’t deserve it.

But if you just met her and you’re having a conversation, and she’s been nothing but nice and warm?

GIVE HER A COMPLIMENT.

I find the “don’t give her a compliment” camp quite funny because they’re so afraid of coming off like they’re “beta” that they inevitably come off as beta. They’re afraid of some girl thinking, “Oh, he likes me.” Sounds pretty lame to me.

Complimenting a girl makes it a man-to-woman interaction. She knows you’re attracted, have a sexual and romantic interest in her, and are going for it.

Girls respect that purposefulness.

Okay, so why is the title of this article “14 Anytime Compliments to Use on Her Today”?

Because you can use these compliments anywhere and anytime.

The sun is up? Compliment.

The sun is down? Compliment.

The world is ending in an inferno of chaos? Compliment.

You can use it at any point in the conversation.

The first thing you say (the “open”)? COMPLIMENT.

Five minutes into conversation? Compliment.

As you’re fishing for the edge of her uterus with your dick? CUMPLIMENT.

K. Cool. Compliments are cool.

So, how do you give a good compliment?

Tactics Tuesdays: "She'll Probably Reject Me (So Let's Try)"

Chase Amante's picture

reject me
An easy way to get your feet moving despite fears of rejection: just tell yourself "She'll likely reject me anyway... so let's go see what happens.

I just talked with one of our senior discussion forum members, who took on the 30 Days Invite a Girl Home Challenge. This is a challenge for advanced guys, where the singular goal is to invite a new girl home each and every day for 30 straight days. She doesn't have to say yes and you don't have to sleep with her, but you do need to invite her home to do it. The goal is to push a guy's comfort zone and open his eyes to what's possible.

In our forum member's case, his first day on the challenge ended up with the girl he invited home saying yes and going home with him. However, he liked this girl a lot, overthought things a bit, and escalated too timidly, despite feeling like the girl was quite into him.

He didn't get the lay (although he did get a nice start to the 30 day challenge!), and the girl left.

He tried to set a date up with her later, and she LJBF'ed him.

His escalation (too unaggressive for her level of horniness) was the immediate cause, he figured... but the root cause was that he liked her too much, which led him to go too slow for this girl's tastes.

Does he just need to convince himself not to like girls too much, he wondered?

That brought to mind a long-time technique I've used to overcome nervous hesitation with women, that might be useful to some guys.

It's this: you simply tell yourself "Well she's probably going to reject me, so let's try anyway and just see what happens."