How to Use Your Job to Meet Women
Nice work if you can get it… and you can get it if you try.
Billie Holiday said it best… yes, there are jobs out there in which you could get PAID to meet women - beautiful ones, at that!
If you want to improve your social skills, it makes sense to work in a very social job. And if you’re serious about getting great at flirting with women, you will have to do it a LOT… so why not get paid for it?
Some of these jobs are merely an opportunity to get paid to practice dealing with different kinds of people in different kinds of social situations… in other jobs we’ll be talking about, you literally get paid to approach beautiful women!
Sales and Seduction: A Synergy
The qualities that make a good salesman and the qualities that make a good seducer are very similar… and getting good at one will improve your skills at the other!
Most importantly, you have to be able to overcome your shyness and hesitation and make a step toward people you don’t know… and if they should reject you, it needs to roll off you like water off a duck’s back.
Most people who are new to sales have the same fear of approaching strangers as those new to the art of seducing women.
There is, however, a great advantage to sales:
When you approach a beautiful woman and she gives you the impression that you’re simply not her type, it’s pretty easy to take the rejection personally… the ego is easily hurt by such things.
In fact, many men NEVER go out to meet women, just to protect themselves from this possibility (which really only means they’re missing out on ALL opportunities).
The difference between seduction and sales is, if a prospective client rejects a salesman, however, they might just not be interested in the product – it doesn’t reflect on HIM.
This makes sales a great exercise to practice overcoming approach anxiety, as well as dealing with when a girl rejects you. After you have worked in sales for a while, rejection just doesn’t phase you anymore… and you can just keep going, even after the tenth no in a row. Something that comes in very handy when you’re out on the town!
Can you imagine how useful it would be if you could just approach any girl without any fear, and not take rejections personally?
What’s more, ALL your social muscles are in the gym when you work in sales: you will improve your ability to break the ice with a stranger, learn to be charismatic and learn personal magnetism, upgrade your skills of persuasion, and so on… it’s a great training program. And not only is it free… you even get to bank cash for doing it!
The Inner Game of Sales
The “inner game” is a concept credited to W. Timothy Gallway – it refers to the MENTAL aspect of any skill.
And the inner game of sales is pretty much EXACTLY the same as the inner game of approaching beautiful women… which is another reason why working in sales is an EXCELLENT way to get paid for honing your dating skills and your ability to meet women.
Let me elaborate on that a bit…
If you’ve ever heard of the book “Think and Grow Rich”, you’re no stranger to Napoleon Hill’s work (and if you are, I highly recommend you pick up a copy of this book IMMEDIATELY – it is a life changer, and many of its lessons apply to dating as much as to finances!). (get it here)
What you might or might not know, however, is that Napoleon Hill was not only a public speaker and writer, but also an outstanding salesman and sales trainer.
The following is a direct quote from the master – and sums up the main reason why salespeople (and seducers!) succeed or fail on the approach:
“The sale ought to be made before you ever come into the presence of the buyer! You will be surprised to know what a CHANGE there will be in people when you come sending out over this broadcasting station of yours positive thoughts instead of thoughts of fear.
You broadcast your thoughts, and they precede you, and when you get there, you find that instead of getting the cooperation you went after, the other person reflects back to you what? That state of DOUBT, that state of mind that you sent out ahead of you!”
Really take a minute to reflect on this quote… and think about how it applies to how you meet women.
Think about this A LOT… I’m serious.
It is SO PROFOUND that this one lesson alone can turn your game around COMPLETLY.
Cold Calling and the Lessons You’ll Learn
Another type of job that is somewhat similar to that of a salesman is any line of work that involves cold calling.
You might do this as a job, working for somebody else… at a call center or selling software over the phone, in customer service, technical support or market research.
Or you might do it on your own accord to promote your services in your own field of expertise.
Either way, this is another great exercise for many skills that come in handy for any would-be Casanova.
An excellent way to learn any skill is to break it down into its components and to then practice them one by one, in isolation. By practicing your social skills over the phone, you do exactly that; since there is no body language, you can really focus on
- your conversational repertoire, and – more importantly –
- your vocal inflection and the EMOTIONS you communicate with your VOICE.
Just from hearing the TONE of your voice, people can pick up on how you’re feeling – and as Napoleon Hill explained, they will reflect these emotions back to you.
- Are you confident: are you communicating you’re expecting them to receive you well, or are you afraid and nervous? (Don’t worry if it’s the latter, this will improve with practice).
- Do you have a sexy voice: does your voice resonate with a sexy, masculine bass, or is it high pitched or too nasal? (Record yourself to work on that one).
- Are you warm: are you projecting warmth and friendliness, is your voice soothing and calm, or would it put people on edge?
Get paid to practice all these skills… and of course, this will also be a tremendous asset when you make the first phone call to those girls’ numbers you’ve been collecting!
Meet Women as a Club Promoter
Everything up to here was just the warmup… ways to get paid to practice your social skills. Now let’s look at a few jobs in which you actually get paid to talk to beautiful women… and get a chance to flirt with girls… or more!
The first is working as a club promoter.
You can keep your day-job. Your NEW job will be chatting up people at night and getting them to come into your club. This is obviously going to be a weekend job for the most part, but I have at times done it five nights a week as well.
And… it is a BLAST!
In fact with this job, it’s really hard to believe that you would actually get paid to do this.
You hang out around the clubs and party with your friends (other promoters) and talk to beautiful girls, you get free drinks, there’s music playing, everybody’s having fun and not only is it all free of charge for you… somebody actually gives you MONEY to party!
After talking to people outside, you might go to the club for more promotional social interaction there - and you can always run at least some game.
This is especially good for new guys – because now you have a REASON to approach (hey - it's your job!) – which takes the edge off the anxiety.
Even more importantly - you will be talking to SEVERAL HUNDRED girls every single night - so it will completely rewire your brain, and kill the fear of the approach once and for all.
Write your phone number on flyers you hand out to a girl you like, and get her number in the process. Or just tell her that you'll see her later in the club! Maybe you can get her in for free, but demand she do you a favor in return later.
Also make sure you work for a happening club, so girls will be interested in what you have to say and not just be annoyed by advertisement. I used to work for a world famous club - every girl stopped dead in her tracks when I said I was offering a promotion for VIP tickets.
In fact, this is how I met some of the most beautiful girls I've been with in my life… and I got PAID for it!
And sure, maybe you can make more money in your normal job – but you won’t have as much fun, you won’t meet as many women, you won’t overcome your fear of the approach AND your response to rejection, and you won’t build your social calibration and your network as quickly.
At hundreds and hundreds of approaches per night, that’s a guarantee!
In fact… it has been said that women have much greater social skills than men – and maybe that is true, on average. But a part of this is simply due to the fact that beautiful women get approached several times per day. So by the time she hits her sexual prime at the age of 23, she has talked to thousands of men!
How many beautiful women have you approached in your life?
Now let’s assume in this job you talk to only 300 women a night (and that’s a low guess) – you can catch up to her and acquire the same experience in a couple of weeks!
You will also get totally desensitized to rejection… because you KNOW that the people who don’t respond well to your approach aren't actually rejecting YOU… they're just rejecting the club you work for. Or maybe they simply don't have time to talk. Or they might have agreed to meet somebody elsewhere. Or they may have had a bad day.
Whatever the reason, as opposed to women who sometimes DO reject you because they’re just not into you, in this job you get rejected a lot, but never based on something that has anything to do with you at all.
The perfect way to grow that thick skin.
Another bonus in the club I did it for (and you wanna try and find something like that): we were doing the promotion in a group of about a dozen people, all of us wearing VIP shirts, and we were rolling with the stunning female gogo-dancers of the club!
That's four huge social proof factors in your favor:
- You're with a group of cool people
- You're having a great time (don't worry, you will in THIS job)
- You're with lots of beautiful women
- You're VIP in this hip venue (it says so on your shirt!)
How To Land This Gig
If you go about it systematically, you will prove Billie Holiday right in a heart beat.
Go to all the big clubs and talk to the promoters there. Talk to the doormen and the managers, introduce yourself and mention any experience you’ve had in social jobs (the sales and cold calling I had mentioned above would come in handy here, but any job where you worked with people will do).
Call if you have to – you can even leave a CV, but I’ve found the personal impression is what really counts in the job.
Another option is working for free for a while, like the bar job - even if they don't hire you for money afterwards, you can then look for a job and say that you have experience.
If you’re having a hard time getting a foot in the door, work your way up – start in smaller, less popular clubs, and then approach the most trendy venues once you’ve built a track record.
You might even consider working for free for a while, to prove your value – it’s not “real work” anyway, and even without pay, you’ll still get a lot out of it.
After some time, you will have made friends with all the barmen and always get your drinks for free, even when you’re not working there anymore… And trust me, if you can find some beautiful girls who are up for a private after-party, the club owner won’t mind letting them stay for an open bar once the doors are closed!
I think you can imagine what this might lead to…
... Or, Meet Women by Day
Maybe you don’t want to be a club promoter… and the thought of cigarette smoke, loud music and drunk girls doesn’t sound very appealing – not even if you were paid to be there.
Not to worry – you can also meet girls and work as a promoter during the daytime.
One example are fundraisers in the street, that get associates for non-profit or charity organisations (like doctors without borders for example, or the cancer society… there are a lot of options). You will probably be working with cute, liberal girls too!
That way you get to practice going out during the day to meet women... and get paid for it too.
Onward and upward,
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