Assumptions as Tools of Attraction
from Chase: this is Alek's
first article with Girls Chase, but he's been writing on dating girls,
sex, and seduction almost as long as I have. Alek – whom you may know
by some other names (I'll let him share those with you below) – is a
guy who makes a habit of pushing the sexual boundaries as far as he can
take them with girls. His material is going to be most useful to the
advanced seducer interested in pulling off more challenging sexual
feats with women. Here's Alek.
Not so long ago, I received an email from our dear Chase, asking me to be a contributor here. Could I say no?
So here I am. I am Alek Rolstad, also known as Teevster, and originally known, for those of you familiar with the late, great mASF, by my old handle there, “TVA_Oslo”. I have been in the community since 2007… and I started at the age of 15! Having a high level of testosterone back then, I was deeply focused on taking part in wild sex stories. Years later, I've matured up – not that I started disliking having wild sex (I still indulge a little here and there), but my purpose in pickup and seduction has become deeper in its nature.
My purpose with studying seduction is to get a deep understanding in female sexuality and figure out ways to release women's inner beasts. Believe me or not, but female sexuality at its purest is beautiful, dirty and deep.
I will post a lot concerning these topics – how to release her inner beast… easily translated into “how to make her wet and sexually open at the same time”.
However, as this is my first post here, I would like to share something very quickly, so you can get a feel and a taste of what is about to come.
I would like to start off on a high note.
You may have asked yourself the question – “how do I get sexual with a woman”. This is a very wise question because if your goal is to have sex quickly, make her wet and sexually open toward you, you must be concerned about setting a sexual frame.
Now there are many ways to get sexual with a woman – i.e. sexual framing. But often times, many of these techniques are advanced and difficult. Therefore I would like to share with you today a technique that is so simple, yet so powerful that you are all going to laugh at me – but I am sure you will love it.
And… no worry there will be a lot more posts concerning sexual framing from me, but let us start with something basic.
Today I would like to teach you how to use assumptions and how they can be used to set a sexual frame in a natural and genuine way.
What Are “Assumptions”?
First I'll cover what I mean with “assumption”.
Then I'll explain how it works.
“Assumptions” are, of course, all about assuming something about a girl. “Cold reading” is basically the same thing – but honestly calling it “assumptions” instead of “cold reading” sounds way less weird and creepy.
For example, when you talk to a woman you can assume something about her, such as “you must be from around here”; now, you have no idea whether your assumption about her is true or not, you just… assume something.
You can more or less assume anything you like about her. Be creative.
Now you are wondering – why should you assume things about her? Well first of all, it is an amazing way to create rapport – getting to know each other and create certain bond between you and the girl. It's a way of building comfort with one another.
In many cases, most guys do this by asking superficial, surface-level questions about her and not going much deeper. This can work, but honestly, is that not a little boring? It is indeed. Assuming things about her is more fun and more exciting. And trust me, most women have met thousands of guys who have been asking her a list of boring questions ( “where are you from”, “what are you working with”, “what are your passions”).
Using assumptions is way better than asking questions, because when you ask questions, you are requesting an answer – in other words, demanding something from her. You can probably see what is wrong with the following – an attractive male is more or less outcome independent.
Therefore, it will not hurt you doing something a little bit different than most men. In fact, that is what makes you attractive. Not only will the use of assumptions make you stand out, it also have a lot of other qualities:
- It is exciting (for both you and her)
- It makes her do the talking
- It sets a very flirty vibe
I'd like to give you a few more examples of assumptions before we proceed:
- “You seem like a nerdy girl who loves reading books”
- “I am sure you are an adventurous woman”
- “You're the type of girl who just loves eating candy” (don't use on a curvy girl)
So far so good, but you're probably asking yourself – what if I assume something wrong about her? Yes, that will most likely happen; as you are not a mind reader. You cannot always be right about your assumptions, nor is this expected of you.
Personally, I prefer to be wrong in my assumptions. Let us say she's wearing pink, and then I will assume the following about her “You're wearing pink! You must be a very feminine woman”. It turns out that according to herself, she is not that feminine (fun fact, most people knows jack all about themselves; the way they perceive themselves can differ from the way they actually are, sometimes quite dramatically).
As it turns out, she disagrees with me. But this isn't bad. Usually, if she is a slightest interested in my perception of her, she will most of the time comment back.
Keep in mind that most people dislike the fact that other people have false beliefs about them, so in the majority of the cases women will in fact correct you and tell you the truth about them every time you make an incorrect assumption.
Therefore, a girl will may say that what you said about her is wrong and tell you the truth about herself, which is a good thing because she is then opening herself up to you – she is talking about herself – a lot of rapport will be created and the conversation will keep going with a natural flow.
And in other cases, women will start wondering why exactly you thought what you did about her (why did you think of her as a feminine woman?). This will allow you to explain why you just assumed what you assumed about her.
There are a lot of positive effects from this, but the most important thing is that it keeps the conversation going; the vibe becomes way more flirty and genuine. Simply more exciting! A lot of opportunities will be created from this.
Sometimes, however, you are just lucky (or good!) and you might assume something correct about her. This is also cool because she will be amazed with your “magic mind reading skills”.
Whatever the outcome is – whether you guessed something right or guessed something wrong about her – you can still use it to your advantage… we can easily call this a win-win situation.
A few other important notes:
Be creative! Oftentimes you will base your assumption on something you perceive about her – her clothes, her voice, her attitude, and the way she looks and what she says. This is good. But it is also okay to just be creative. Just assume something. Because remember, it is not expected you to always assume something true about her.
Reframing. You can also easily use assumptions to reframe a conversation. If a conversation is going nowhere or in an undesired direction, just make an assumption and the topic will change. With this technique you will have full control over the interaction, because all you have to do is make an assumption and the topic will be based on that.
Now that we've got a handle on what assumptions are, and a basic handle on how to use them, let's talking about putting our assumptions to use building some sexual tension.
The golden rule for sexual framing is to escalate the vibe - lead the interaction from being simply social into a more sexual domain.
What we need is to escalate the sexual aspect of the interaction. However, I oftentimes see many guys failing to understand what is truly meant by “escalation”.
When you escalate the vibe with a woman, you lead the interaction through different steps – it is a step-by-step system. What many men believe is that escalation means going from A to Z in one huge bold move. That might work, but most of the cases it doesn’t.
You have to lead the interaction up step by step.
Why? Because most people, especially women, find it too jarring to go from social to sexual in one bold move – things have to flow. Suddenly turning from platonic to sexual feels awkward and makes women very uncomfortable.
Women are more risk averse than us men as they know instinctively that they cannot afford failing in their selection of men. There are multiple reasons for that which I won’t go into here, but for social reputation reasons and biological reasons, going home with the wrong man can give them serious consequences.
Therefore we need to do things step by step – make them feel comfortable, and help them relax a bit.
The way you escalate is by proceeding according to the woman's level of interest and receptiveness. If the vibe is positive, go on with your escalation. If it is negative, tone things down and try again later.
Remember, women’s mood is like tropical weather; it changes a lot. So if things are going great, move forward. If not, take a step back, make her comfortable and try again later. These rules apply for any type of escalation – including physical escalation.
The Step-by-Step Assumption Formula
This step-by-step formula is exactly what we are going to opt for when using assumptions for sexual framing. We'll escalate the vibe from a social into a sexual one by using assumptions.
The way this works is by starting of with a very innocent assumption about her. This should lead into a little discussion about her – and hopefully about you as well. From there you can either make an assumption inspired by the current discussion or you can just assume something about her from nowhere:
“You look like you're a dancer!”
The second assumption should be more intriguing. It should be explicitly and indirectly sexual:
“I feel that you are a very adventurous person.”
This should lead to another conversation. In this case the conversation will be about adventures – more implicitly sexual in nature. From there if it feels right – if she has been giving you good vibes, been receptive and given you some subtle signs of interests – then proceed with an even more sexually loaded assumption:
“You seem like a girl who loves playing with men.”
Now we're getting really sexual. If things are going great from there, you can spice things up. Honestly I have oftentimes reach the point of being able to be very straightforward and dirty with my assumptions about women; this is very doable even when you've just met (maybe especially when you've just met).
Again the key is this: if she is very receptive you can speed things up but if she is passive or responding negatively, just take a step back, tone things down and try again later.
I would like to give some examples before I proceed.
- “You're the typical book reader type of girl”
- “You seem very into fashion”
- “I have seen you out before, you are such a party girl”
- “I feel you love music”
Lightly sexual assumptions:
- “It seems to me you are an adventurous girl”
- “Oh my god, you are such an innocent girl”
- “You are spontaneous”
- “You are the type of girl who loves feeling sexy”
Strongly sexual assumptions:
- “You are a virgin!”
- “I think you are a freak – in a good way of course”
- “I think you like dominant men – and probably dominant sex too”
- “You are a little dirty girl”
The Next Level
Most of the time, when you start talking about dirty sex with women, they will neglect everything you say and become very defensive. The same thing goes for assumptions.
The reason is that there is a certain stigma around women’s sexuality – women who are behaving in a promiscuous way are in our society labelled sluts. Now this is unfair and very immoral, but there is not much we can do about it, and we have to play the game either way.
As a result, women will avoid being perceived as sexual beings, and
every average men out there, by making themselves perceived as pure
Madonnas – but we know
better, that this is baloney. They play pretend to keep up appearances
every bit as important in the modern age as it was in the Victorian Era.
But still, whether you believe it or don't believe it, whenever we try to be sexual, they will act like if they were true Madonnas. For example, if I assume “you are the type of girl who loves wild sex” (fun fact – every woman loves wild sex), they will respond with “nah, for me love is more important”.
This is just a trick they are playing on you because they believe that this type of behaviour is attractive to men.
Being promiscuous is equal to being slutty; being perceived as unattractive by most men (average men). Women want you to have a positive perception of them and they have no idea who you are – namely, a man who loves women for being sexual beings – and they assume you are like the rest, and from there behave like you were one of those.
But what if you show a girl that you think of her as a sexual creature
and that that's a positive
Like for example, complimenting her on being sexual?
Or communicating to her that you are non-judgemental and that you actually appreciate women who are behaving in congruence with their own sexuality?
Well, in this case they will oftentimes open up to you and feel more comfortable admitting their true sexual nature. The reason is rather obvious; they feel that by behaving this way toward you, they will be perceived as attractive – which is something most women want.
So what I do when I make a very dirty assumption is to state that I enjoy that thing I am assuming about her.
Let me give you a few examples:
- “You are the type of girl who is into wild sex – that is so hot and sexy”
- “May I guess, you are into BDSM – I think that’s a pretty normal thing, dominant sex is hot”
- “I think you love threesomes – which I think is so cool because I love threesomes too”
You get the idea.
Some Final Notes on Assumptions
By simply assuming something about a woman, you will make your conversations much more exciting. You create rapport; maybe even generate a certain extent of flirting. It also makes you stand out as an attractive male because you will lead the conversation in a non-boring way.
Beside all this, using assumptions can easily help you control the frame. By doing a random assumption during a conversation is a very efficient way to change the topic of conversation and even reframe the whole interaction.
But most important of all, assumptions can be used to set a sexual frame. By escalating the vibe by assuming dirtier and dirtier things about her, we finally end up with an interaction with a strong sexual frame.
And that's it for today! Hope you enjoyed this. Please leave a comment: as I am new here, both Chase and I are very interested in the feedback for helping to steer the direction of future articles.
And also, questions are welcome
Until next time!
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