Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

Unjustified Compliance for Fun and Profit


unjustified complianceWhen you’re already pretty good with girls, you can start bending rules and not just get away with it – you can actually make things go better.

Today’s article is going to be about how you can amplify the impact of your compliance requests and demands by subtracting some of the supporting elements (justifications) that make them easier for women to agree to.

In effect, you can get more investment, faster, by making women make harder choices to invest.

Who’s this suited for? Only men who are already talented at getting women to invest in them heavily all the way up to and including the bedroom. Use it in situations where you haven’t developed your skill set as fully yet and you’ll be shooting yourself in the foot.

So, if you’re newer or intermediate, this is probably one you’ll want to largely steer clear of except perhaps in micro-cases where you’re already quite good at getting certain levels of compliance, or dealing with a girl who’s ridiculously into you. We’ll clarify this below so it’s less abstract and more clear cut.

But if you’re already pretty advanced, and you want to take women from “I think I like this guy” to “I am sold on this guy”, adding in some barebones higher stakes compliance requests to your interactions can be a fun and effective way to do this.

How to Get Started at Picking Up Girls


In “Why Talking Less is (Usually) Best”, Anonymous asks:

Hey Chase, I’ve noticed something with me.

Well, I read most of your articles, understand your advices ( which are great) but I just can’t apply them. Let me explain :

I read an article for instance, I think “ Oh, really cool advice, I SHOULD try it out!!!!! I get like excited about it, eventually try it out but don’t stick to it as a habit so it becomes natural.

So I’m going to ask you something no probably ever did :

How to stick to all the advices available on this site so it can be... natural and it does not feel like acting anymore.

How to use your articles in the best way they can be used?? And how to put them in great practice?

I heard that a habit takes about 30 days to be implemented in someone.

Can it apply for seduction techniques?

This is a common problem, and it is actually something guys ask fairly often: how do I get started applying all this stuff?

start picking up girls

How do you actually get out there meeting girls, chatting them up, and picking them up?

There are various answers on this site, from articles on overcoming approach anxiety to those on forming new habits to those on getting motivated (and out of the house). There is the diagnostic quiz and its four eBooks tailored to your skill level, and there are programs like my tome on the subject or the Mastery package.

However, lately I’ve been catching myself falling into the trap of anyone who’s done something for a long time and telling guys things like, “Dude, just go DO it,” which isn’t much help to someone new.

So, in light of that, what this article is is a nuanced, step-by-step guide to how to get started at picking up girls – how you apply the lessons from Girls Chase, not just on things like nonverbal fundamentals (which you can practice in front of your bathroom mirror), but on things like social skills / approaching / game, which require much more oomph to do.

6 Outfits That Will Help You Look Sexy


Packaging matters significantly, so it’s really not surprising that there are quite a few superb articles here at GirlsChase that help us become sexy.

Today I would like to expand this list by sharing an article that can be considered the men’s style equivalent of the pick-up line – simple, practical, and, when executed perfectly, one that will get results. Just as a pick-up line is an answer to the very broad topic of “well, what do I say?”, this article will offer you a canned answer to another just as broad topic: “well, what do I wear?”

But enough with the analogies – let me explain what I have prepared for you today. In this article we’ll discuss six different outfits, for different situations, all designed to help you get one result: look sexy.

As we all have different preferences for our personal style, we’ll split these outfits into three categories:

  • Elegant edgy
  • Rugged masculine
  • Classy and smart

This way we’ll not only make sure that there’s a look suitable for everyone, but also show you that there’s more than one sexy look, and that not everyone needs to go out looking like a rock star or a preppy nice guy.

How to Avoid Being a “Nice Guy”


In both the seduction community and the Manosphere, the term “beta male” is the diametrical opposite of the “alpha male”. He is also a contagious meme in the popular culture, but he is, contrary to the “alpha male”, usually referred to by folk terminology.

He is known as a “nice guy”.

avoid being a nice guy

As discussed in the previous article about “alpha male” and “sigma male” strategies, the term “beta male” is used in an imprecise way in the seduction community and the Manosphere, and I will thus not use it in the rest of this article. However, the almost synonymous concept of a “nice guy” is used in a rather consistent sense in contemporary society and it thus makes sense to discuss what characterizes him.

While there is much advice around on how socially dominant men behave and how to become more socially dominant, there is the problem that the advice usually only attempts to fix superficial behavior patterns of such “nice guys” and does not treat the underlying psychological conditionings that created the “nice guy” in the first place.

This is problematic because it causes incongruence, usually in the form of dominant behavior patterns that are in conflict with the underlying “nice guy” belief system.

There is also an incongruence problem in that a player lifestyle will generate reference experiences that are often deemed as negative in the “nice guy’s” belief system. This article will discuss how the “nice guy” has been conditioned and how the “nice guy” can recondition himself on multiple levels in order to become more socially successful. But first we will discuss why all these “nice guys” are around in the first place.

Making the Approach: Picking and Choosing Girls to Meet


Note from Chase: this was a “lost article” of Alek’s that was originally supposed to be the a piece in his series on bitchy girls and hit and run game. It slipped through the cracks and never got published. In it, there is a reference to his upcoming article; this article’s in fact already out, and it’ll be linked to where referenced. But that’s the backstory – here’s Alek...


We may keep writing articles covering fancy seduction techniques, but what is the point if people don’t go out there and try them out?

Fact is, most people stay at home and don’t talk much to women, not because they are lazy, but because they suffer from approach anxiety. Now, many of you might consider this to be a post for beginners, but, as a matter of fact, many more experienced seducers have trouble approaching too.

making the approach

I will here share a confession and some insights on approach anxiety while criticizing the classic way of doing things (i.e., approach a lot until you get used to it). At the end of this post, I will share with you a different perspective on approaching women.

Again, this is not primarily a post for beginners. Many of us struggle with approaching – the approaching phase is not really pleasurable for most of us. That’s why this post is relevant to men of all levels.

Why Do Girls Have Gay Friends?


Note from Chase: this is a guest post from Sarah Williams of Wingman Magazine. In this article, Sarah shares the features in gay men that women find so alluring, and why women keep gay men in their lives and around them. If you haven’t spent much time in gay bars, you might be surprised how cute and sexually available the women who hang around gay men can be; if you’d like a peephole into why this is, this article’s a solid primer on the subject. Take it away, Sarah.


Imagine the scene: a bar, a pretty girl or even a group of good looking girls, all hanging out with just one guy in their circle. He doesn’t seem to be a Dan Bilzerian playboy type either. He’s just their friend, laughing and having a great time with all of them. This lucky guy is simply surrounded by hot females, who all get along very well with him, instead of hanging out with a bunch of dudes talking about football. He doesn’t seem to be doing anything special, but the most beautiful chicks stick to him like bees to a honeycomb... They all have so much fun together!  He treats the presence of beautiful girls around him as a naturally comfortable situation. Why couldn’t that be you who so easily enters and enjoys a group of beautiful girls without being completely awkward?

girls like gay guys

There is one major different between you and him – you’re not gay.

You’ve probably seen at least one pretty girl or even a group of pretty girls laughing and having fun with a gay guy. I personally love to hang out with gay guys even though I’m looking for straight men. As a single woman who lives in a big city, I have quite a bit of choice with whom I hang out with. I love going out with my girlfriends, and I’m friends with guys both at work and outside of work, but most of my very best male friends are gay!  And I’m definitely not the only female who appreciates their company…

What makes gay guys so special that women love to hang out with them?  What makes so many females choose gay guys as their best friends?

The answer is more complex than just sexual orientation. It touches on certain common characteristics and typical behaviors gay guys display towards women. When it comes to conquering women’s hearts, straight guys could learn a lot from gay guys.

Why Talking Less is (Usually) Best


I had a tiresome dialogue on a long train ride yesterday where I found myself being sidetracked on irrelevancies in what originally seemed like it’d be an engaging conversation.

Throughout the course of this unfortunately lengthy conversation (it was a 6 hour train ride), this man repeatedly ignored points I’d made, talked over me, and argued with me over the most tangential points to our primary conversation subject.

talk less listen more

The tragedy to me was that the conversation had started off with the possibility of being truly engrossing, only for my seatmate to repeatedly divert us to arguing over semantics like the definition of the word ‘training’ (which didn’t even matter; we could’ve used any other word if we had different definitions for what constitutes training and what doesn’t, but my interlocutor couldn’t let it go).

The funny thing was that repeatedly throughout this conversation, this fellow brought up wanting to trade numbers with me, to meet up with me again and bring me along to some free class he was attending, and other things of that nature; and he kept offering me food he had with him and even bought me a bottled water off the drink cart when it came by and I wasn’t present (and I didn’t have any small bills to pay him back for it). The entire time he kept telling me I could pay him back the next time I saw him, which only made me grate my teeth more.

I felt like a pretty girl being hounded by a really nice but really clueless and annoying guy. I kept hoping someone was going to come along and save me. Because it was a packed train ride, there wasn’t anywhere else I could escape to, either (though in retrospect I suppose I could’ve snuck off to the meal car; didn’t think of it). Eventually I was able to let this conversation die long enough for me to fall into a nap and be free.

It occurred to me that this man probably does this with everyone; he enters into these alienating conversations with people, tries to lecture them, ignores any indication that they may know as much or more about a subject than he does, and gets sidetracked on irrelevancies. And that can happen to anyone who’s reasonably educated and passionate about a subject from time to time; I’m sometimes (on rare occasions) guilty of this myself, too.

Yet, had this fellow known the value of talking less, instead of struggling so mightily to be heard and to be right, he wouldn’t have needed to resort to bribery and manipulation to try to coax me into meeting him.

He could’ve simply given me the chance to talk a little bit, and genuinely engaged with me instead.

Online Dating Podcast Interview with Chase and MenProvement


Something I don’t talk about a huge amount on here but that I have spent a good amount of time learning is how to maneuver and find success in the online dating world.

About a month(?) or so ago, Sean Russell from the excellently named MenProvement Podcast asked me to hop onto his show and chat about strategies for online dating.

The end result was an hour-long podcast interview in which I discussed most of the material from “How to Meet Tons of Girls on Plenty of Fish”, went a little deeper on a few of these topics, and covered a few new bits of detail I didn’t have back when I wrote the article. In addition to this, Sean gives an in-depth overview of a number of the dating sites he’s reviewed and is familiar with, with plenty of fresh intel on the digital dating landscape there for anyone who’s interested.

7 Bits of Relationship Advice Every Relationship Needs


I’ve been exposed to relationships of all lengths, types, and sizes throughout my years on this earth. And through close observation, I’ve noticed that, although people think that their relationship is singularly unique, that is almost never the case. In fact, I may go as far as to say that that’s never the case.

relationship advice

Whenever I see a dysfunctional relationship, I pretty much see the same symptoms that I see and will see in every other dysfunctional relationship. And the same goes for the healthy relationships I see as well. So if you find yourself in a relationship, or even thinking about being in one, then let me give you a few tips about certain features I’ve noticed that every healthy relationship has.

In a nutshell, I believe that most relationships don’t have a strong enough trajectory of improvement. The partners in the relationships simply aren’t invested enough in growing the dynamic to be deeper and richer. They do so to a point, and then kind of let the relationship plateau, until someone inevitably becomes dissatisfied.

And because of this fact, I believe that most people are in relationships that aren’t right for them. This is a particularly troublesome problem in the West, where emotional intelligence is at an all-time low. People simply don’t invest enough time in understanding themselves and how they react and interact with other people, and, in turn, they don’t understand how to delve deep into the perspectives of other people.

So today I want to talk about how people and relationships can move toward having healthier and happier dynamics, because a truly fulfilling relationship can transform the way you live your life. However, most people just don’t know how to go about running that kind of relationship.

So without further ado…

Classroom Body Language Part II: Positioning and More


This is the follow up to “Classroom Body Language and Other Casual Situations”.


Women don’t see the world logically; when it comes to body language they explicitly avoid logic and instead just “feel” things out. They generally don’t think “Oh it is okay that that guy chose a corner” or “Well he just wasn’t feeling social today”, they generally take things you do as if it relates to them somehow and end up thinking you don’t like girls or are “usually grumpy” or something.

So if you want to get good at body language in a confined space, like in a classroom, you will need to act as if women will never hear your rationalizations for acting passive.

classroom body language

In the absence of girls reading you logically, you need to pay attention to what you do:

  • Positioning
  • Social momentum and how it is affecting your mood
  • How it might relate to her

Most guys just look for where to sit in a very logical way, but it is here at the start that their body language is set into motion to be bland, as they don’t care about what they are doing around women and lack appreciation for their environment and what their positioning communicates. Try to never just randomly pick a spot or let the crowd push you into a corner. It is okay to feel exposed; it will force you to stop playing around and think about your body language.

Great body language will allow you to sit anywhere openly.

Few people know this, but body language relies on social momentum, so never cut and run from exposure; never shroud your shoulders and turn away from everything. Small social interactions fuel body language, and this fuel is necessary to highlight how you feel about women to the women who look at you.