Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

How to Not Be Shy


You know the feeling – the one where you see a group of people laughing about a movie you love or getting excited about an overseas location that you know like the back of your hand.

But there you are, standing on the outskirts of the group. Maybe you have a drink in your hand. Maybe you have your hands in your pockets. Maybe you have you arms crossed. Whatever the case may be, you feel intimidated, uneasy, and possibly even scared about the situation at hand.

how to not be shy

You want to be a part of the fun. You know you have something to offer. But the prospect of approaching new people – or worse, approaching that beautiful girl across the room – is much too daunting for your brain to grasp. So you sit there. Doing nothing. Feeling awkward. And then you go home, not making a splash – not even making a ripple.

And you wonder to yourself: “Will things always be like this? Will I ever overcome my shyness and actually connect with people?”

Well, if you’ve been wondering about how to not be shy, wonder no more. I’ve put together a complete primer on how to overcome shyness.

How to Get Girls to Your Hotel Room Without Reception Interfering


In this post I will tell you how you can increase your chances of bringing a girl over to your hotel room without being shut down by hotel receptionists.

There is nothing more annoying than having a good night out abroad, meeting an exotic girl, and then getting cockblocked by a silly receptionist. It has happened to me in the past, and it is terrible.

receptionist cockblock

Now the good news is that it hasn’t happened nearly as often as the times I have brought girls over and had sex in my hotel rooms.

Yet still, why risk being rejected at the door?

This post is a summary of my experiences from my trips this summer. I have been to five hotels this July/August and in none of them have I been cockblocked. The hotels were all in different countries, ranging from Spain, to Romania, Serbia, Ireland, and Scotland.

First of all, let us see why certain hotels reject male customers who try to bring a partner up to their room.

Releasing Your Past and Helping Girls Release Theirs


Ever deal with a girlfriend causing drama by just trying to get her to forget it?

This can seem the expedient path, but rarely is it the most prudent one.

It is just human nature that we don’t want to forget the things that got the better of us. We dwell on the past to avoid getting bested again in the future.

However, in order to make sure the old wounds are not sabotaging us in the present, we have to remember that moving forwards is more important than reminding ourselves of the past.

girl's past

We get stuck in a perpetual loop after bad things have happened sometimes, and that is okay, but sometimes we just need a little help to step outside of those troubles so we can start seeing ourselves acting normal again before we get past it.

Girls are just like anyone else when it comes to the past because they don’t know how to address the same issues if faced with them again in the future. When they face them again they will gain a heightened awareness of how fragile their situation is and worry about it.

Most guys address these concerns the wrong way: they make promises, ignore the looming possibility of reoccurrence of the issue, and target her “focusing on the past” as the problem to be eradicated. The only problem with that is GETTING HIT ONCE IS ENOUGH to double the pain when hit TWICE, so a girl is going exaggerate the importance of the issue if it is ignored.

Girls often mention the past because they are afraid that a positive stream of events they are having will be interrupted by the same BS. In order to help girls move past this, don’t make promises, don’t ignore that it can happen again, and don’t treat her memory and caution as the problem.

Attainability Woes; or, Why Girls Who Like You Reject You


Commenting on “I Can’t Get Girls Because Girls Only Want [BLANK]”, TR asks the following about girls who appear to like you, yet ultimately sabotage their interactions with you due to hang-ups:

I've noticed that even though I can have an outstanding interaction with a woman that clearly likes me, when it comes to closing she may still sabotage herself. This usually happens with women much taller than I am, and though I have no doubt that she really likes me, I'm also pretty certain that the height thing makes her a bit insecure. These women consistently fall over hard for me afterwards (lack of control + attraction is dynamite) but they have that mental block that sabotages them more often than not.

Do you think you could post up a follow-up article on how to handle things like this? Perhaps it has to do with setting the right frames, or maybe it's just a matter of letting go and looking for the right girls instead.

This is a great topic, and it's something you'll run into repeatedly if you're out meeting women fairly often: those girls who clearly like you, are into you, are attracted to you... yet who just won't let themselves do anything with you.

girl likes you but rejects you

It's a disconcerting affair the first couple of times you run into it. "I can tell she likes me," you say to youself. "Why the heck is she rejecting me?"

Ultimately, the problem always comes down to the same thing: attainability.

And no matter how swell a guy you are, how friendly, likeable, or attractive, for one reason or the other, she just doesn't view you as all that attainable... and ends up auto-rejecting.

While you can't always prevent this, once you understand why it's happening you can avoid it sometimes - either by preventing the problem from occurring in the first place, or by recognizing when it is occurring, and nipping it in the bud before it becomes something more dooming.

How to Say No to Others and Turn Down Compliance


how to say noIn Part 3 of my 3-part series on compliance, I’ll be discussing how to say no to people who want compliance out of you – and when specifically to say it (as opposed to saying yes).

You can read Parts 1 and 2 of the series here:

  1. How to Get Her to Say “Yes”
  2. What If She Says No?

Turning down compliance is actually an especially dicey area for most. Even for experienced guys... even for men who are naturals socially... you will run into the odd situation here and there where you aren’t sure whether to say yes or no, and aren’t sure how to say no even if you probably should.

Tell me you’ve been here before: there’s a really cute girl, and you really dig her, yet the dynamic you have with her is just that you’re chasing her a little bit too much... yet, you sense that if you let up even a bit, she’s going to vanish off into the ether.

And then, out of the blue, she says: “Can you wait here a minute? I have to go make a phone call,” then turns to go leave.

Can you say no to this? Should you? What’s your play?

You can sense that letting her do this only worsens your position with her and moves you farther away from getting anywhere with her... but you just don’t know what else to do.

Don’t Get Too Comfortable with Your Friends


I have a hundred stories of me making the mistake of letting my friends cling onto me when out, only to get caught up in their expectations for failure rather than blazing a trail.

Whilst I thought I could drag them along, the reality was that, in order to alleviate their discomfort, I made minor concessions which ultimately caused me to lose my edge (important while learning the ropes).

friends while out

Fortunately though, I have had thousands of other experiences where I didn’t let people cling, and through those experiences have managed to learn how to handle friends on a night out. I’m going to share with you some of my secrets for surviving your friends right now.

How to Arouse a Woman


how to arouse a womanYou’ve approached a woman. You went up to her and joked around about her polka dot dress and vintage style. She laughed, and made further inquiry into who this intrepid gentlemen is. You begin to tell her about yourself and launch into a quality conversation.

You starting thinking to yourself: “Wow. This girl is really something.” She tells you an embarrassing story about how she peed her pants when she was a kid. This makes her seem so down to earth despite how beautiful you find her.

You two like the same music. You’ve traveled to some of the same places. You have similar life values. You think, “This is it. Finally, I’ve found a quality woman.”

You ask her out. “Hey, Julia, I’ve really enjoyed spending time with you here…”

She replies. “Yes! I would love to!”

You’re elated. You swap numbers with her as your heart is pounding. Then you say your goodbyes, ready to leap out of your body with joy.

“It was great meeting you. I look forward to our adventure Julia!”

She reciprocates your goodbye: “It was great meeting you too! I look forward to going out… as friends.”

You stop dead in your tracks. You double-take to make sure you heard her correctly. Friends? Did she just say friends? How is that possible?

How is that possible? You did everything right, right? Wrong. In this scenario, you successfully connected with her, but you failed to arouse her.

Connection is an important component of arousal, but it’s far from the whole story.

So if you’ve ever found yourself in this – or a similar – situation, today I’m going to break down everything involved in how to arouse a woman.

Pickup Footage Breakdown: What Day Game Really Looks Like


Day game is something that is extremely foreign to a large body of people. It’s an exceedingly rare thing to see a man approach a random girl on the street simply to get to know her because he thought she was cute, which can cause a lot of guys to back off and move into more familiar territory such as night game.

However, as it’s been previously discussed, pursuing women only during the night can lead to a large imbalance in the type of women you’re meeting; you’re meeting girls who appear to be hot, rather than women who are hot.

What’s a man to do if he has no experience talking to random girls on the street?

footage: day game

Sure, you can throw him out there and let him take tactics from paper and try to translate them to real life, but having a successful model to emulate will carry you that much further and accelerate your learning curve that much faster.

And this is why we’ve come together to develop a series that takes some of the best video footage from the world of pickup in order convey our message more clearly; not only are you going to read about these topics, you’re going to see them in action.

Just like I’d analyze a field report on the discussion boards, I am going to take these videos and display them while providing my own commentary below with specific references to different parts of the video.

You’ll get to look in-depth at someone who either consciously or subconsciously does things that work with women – all with some commentary from me that will lift the veil on everything that appears to just magically work.

First up to discuss is a short, sweet interaction demonstrating how easy things are once you’ve got your fundamentals running and can come off as an attractive, high-value guy.

Why Do We Label Women “Sluts”?


One of our discussion forum members started a thread asking whether, when surrounded by women decrying the slut label, he should be truthful to himself and state that there’s a good reason behind this label, or whether he should tell women like this what they want to hear (and what he probably needs to say if he wants to sleep with them): that he thinks such a label is totally unreasonable... even if this is being untruthful to himself.

That’s an interesting question, but one I think that the answer to (supposing your goal is to become a real “knock her socks off” ladies man) is a fairly simple “fake it till you make it.”

That is to say, you may think she’s a “slut” now... but once you’ve got a significantly larger amount of sexual experience under your belt, you’re probably not going to care one way or the other about what label fits her best. So might as well just act like you’re already there and get the girl in the meantime. You’ll be glad you did later.

women sluts

But that raised an interesting question for me: why is that newer guys and less experienced guys or, alternately, bitter guys (not necessarily the same as new/inexperienced guys), use the “slut” label on women... while more experienced guys who’ve made their peace with women’s sexuality don’t really care?

What If She Says No?


You did it; you took the plunge and asked her to do something... to come with you, go out with you, tell you something, show you something... to invest.

And now, she’s said no.

what if she says no

Well what exactly do you do? What do you do when she says no?

This is a pressing question for men. If guys didn’t worry about answering the “what if she says no?” question, men everywhere would walk up to the women they wanted and address them with reckless abandon.

There’d be no “missed connections”; no “I saw this beautiful girl today, and she saw me, and I wish I’d gone and said something to her.”

No more “waiting for the right moment”... not really.

Because there’d be no fear of looking awkward and feeling uncomfortable if it didn’t work out. Yet, this is not the case, because men generally do not know how to handle a no.

In Part 2 of our 3-part series on compliance (you can read Part 1 here: How to Get Her to Say “Yes”), we’re going to tackle your options for how to proceed when you get a “no.”