Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

Effortless Leading: Get Her to Buy In


If you’ve ever been tricked or convinced to do something against your original intentions, you’ve been on the receiving end of a failure to get buy in before an action.

When I was a teenager, my parents would always try and convince me and my brothers to get jobs. It’s quite funny that having them tell us to do this actually made us less likely to get jobs, because they were constantly on our backs about it.

They made it seem like it was something that we needed to do against our will. Thus, it was us against them; we had to give excuses as to why we couldn’t get the job, and skillfully dodge being told what to do.

buy in

Convincing people to do things isn’t as simple as telling them what to do.

If I could walk up to a woman and make the first thing out of my mouth be, “Come home with me,” and she immediately acquiesced and did, I wouldn’t be spending time with her creating an emotional connection, comfort, and sexual attraction. In fact, if I made this the first thing out of my mouth she would likely very heavily resist any intention of coming home with me, even if I was the sexiest man on the planet.

She would resist because I failed to get her to buy in to the idea of coming home with me. She had no say in the matter, and thus felt like she was being coerced into doing what I wanted, rather than doing something that was mutually beneficial.

Sleeping with each other requires the collective conscious of both parties involved. She’s not your slave, which makes it absolutely necessary that she is thought of as an equal in the mating game.

Is Trivializing the Root of All Interpersonal Woes?


I was doing some reading the other day when I came across the term “trivializing.”

It gets thrown about in popular media, and often is something you learn to somewhat ignore, just because of how often people lament others “trivializing” some XYZ “really big deal” to them, that seems trite or overblown to others.

And yet...

trivializing

Examine the classic debate between two opposites. Say someone who is pro-renewable energy because he wants to save the planet, and someone else who is pro-fossil fuels because he doesn’t want to be forced to pay top dollar for new, less effective technologies when cheaper alternatives are available.

The first guy accuses the second guy of killing the planet. The second guy feels like the first guy is trivializing his need to not burn a hole in his wallet, and becomes offended, and tells him off. The first guy then feels like the second guy is trivializing his desire to save the planet as an ignoble cause, and fiercely retorts.

This is a case of crossed wires communication-wise of the sort we discussed in “Dale Carnegie’s Most Life-Changing Piece of Advice”, but it goes broader than this, because trivializing comes in many shapes and forms, and it’s hard to detect and harder to combat in nearly all of them.

A Failed Relationship is a Failure of Leadership


Who’s fault is it when a relationship fails?

Two words for you: the man’s.

Usually.

failed relationship

Note: a relationship failure is something different than letting a relationship decline and die, or just breaking up with a girl, because you’ve lost interest or other things in your life have taken precedence or she’s let herself go and is no longer meeting your requirements for someone you’ll keep around in a relationship capacity.

In that case, while a female observer would still consider it a “failed relationship”, from the standpoint of the male it probably isn’t (unless it’s a case of her letting herself go... then, maybe it is, if she was what you wanted before that but stopped being it after it). In that case, it’s just a relationship that didn’t work out.

When I say “failed relationship” here, what I’m talking about is a relationship that you really wanted to work out... but it went belly up anyway.

Is it ever the woman’s fault?

Yes, sometimes. Rarely. In the case where the relationship is a female dominated one because the man has yielded to her the role of captain aboard the good ship Relation... in that case, he is following her lead, and the direction the relationship goes is up to her.

Even then though, I’m torn... because most women who lead don’t want to do it, and resent men who make them do it as weak. If I’m the officer of a military unit and I hand over my command to one of my subordinates, who then goes on to lead us right smack into a disaster, am I absolved of all blame, or do I still take some too?

The large majority of the time, across most kinds of relationships, it’s the fault of you, the man – and nearly always, it’s a failure of leadership that causes the relationship to fold.

How to Get Pussy: 7 Non-PC But Very Effective Tips


how to get pussyLove is an incredible feeling. That wonderful warmth you get when you wake up and read a text from a girl you really care about is one you can’t replace. The thought of her can lift your spirits through the struggles of day-to-day living, and you suddenly feel like you’re ready to conquer the world.

That’s not what this post is about. That’s not what it’s about at all. Sometimes you’re not looking for love. Sometimes you’re not looking for your next girlfriend. Sometimes you’re not trying to go on a date.

Sometimes, as a man, your desire for the night is quite simple: you just want to get pussy. You don’t want to jump through more hoops than you have to; you don’t want to make things too complicated; you just want a sweet slice of that panty pie.

So if you find yourself in this position, how do you go about finding your little head a nice home for the night? Well if you’re looking to find out how to get pussy, then this post is for you.

On Sexual Freedom


I hope you are all ready for some seduction related philosophy. I know I have been writing a lot of practical stuff lately (such as techniques and tactics you can use to seduce women), so today, we will do some theorizing. This is an introduction to the field of sexual ethics, and today’s topic will be Sexual Freedom.

sexual freedom

As this is a discussion of ethics and morals, I will respect that everybody has different values. Some here might have a strict religious backgrounds, whereas others not. Some might prefer a conservative view around sex, others a more liberated one.

However, I would make it clear that this post is basically my personal argument. I believe that sexual freedom and liberty is the pillar of the art of seduction itself, and therefore I believe my views are congruent with the school of thought that Girls Chase is built upon.

Do You Lead Conversations… Or Leave Others Hanging?


Talking effectively is about more than just knowing how to talk: it is about knowing why to talk.

lead a conversation

Never simply waste your effort being a blabber mouth; have a direction, a purpose, and, if nothing else, be conducive to the atmosphere you are looking to build by acting in line with it.

Leading a conversation is essential for helping people lose their anxieties and feel comfortable around you. To achieve that task you have to step up to the plate and avoid the trap of being dependent on others to do all the lifting. You then need to guide the conversation topics in a way that reflects what direction you are thinking of moving in.

The 7 Decisions Every Man Who Will be Successful Makes


Note from Chase: this is a guest post by one of our forum members, Rob Hortzclaw, with editing by Marty, another of our members. Rob’s put together a really solid, detailed, and lengthy piece here (I clocked it at over 7,000 words!) - it’s quite wonderful. I hope you enjoy... here’s Rob.


Want to know the difference between someone who tries his hand at pick-up/seduction and fails, and someone who tries his hand at pick-up and succeeds in transforming his dating life?

Good, I’m glad you asked!

I first stumbled across Girls Chase material in late 2012, after incessantly investing in and thinking about a girl, and having her reject me. It was painful, and all I wanted thereafter was to actually get a girlfriend and have a relationship.

These days, I’m still in the process of doing so... though my goals have changed a bit.

I’m nowhere near mastery of seduction, though I have wrung myself through the meat grinder, have gotten success through cold approach and social circle, and have done things that I would’ve previously thought impossible for myself. In other words, I’m on the path to mastery and I owe much of my success to just 7 decisions.

7 decisions

Back to your original question – what is the difference between failure and success when learning seduction? Someone who tries this stuff and fails doesn’t think the same way as someone who decides he is going to get better with women.

Did you catch the difference between my descriptions of each?

The guy who succeeds in seduction makes several decisions different from the ones made by the guy who tries his hand and drops out.

The interesting thing is that these decisions seem blindingly obvious, but the power behind them is absolutely earth-shattering (or paradigm-shattering) if harnessed.

Barriers to Entry in Pickup and How They Affect Success


We’ve discussed various different avenues men use (and you can tap) to meet new women on here in the past:

pickup barriers to entry

I favor of cold approach personally, but you can certainly make social circle or workplace dating or online work, and in fact that’s how most men meet their women.

And that’s what I want to talk about today: how you meet women and barriers to entry to those avenues.

Because in a lot of ways, meeting girls is just like doing business, and barriers to entry are no exception; the lower these are, the higher the competition, and the tinier the rewards.

The Look: Make Your Eye Contact Piercing


One of the most powerful means of communicating with others nonverbally is by calling up your most piercing, incisive eye contact.

I sometimes also call this the “death stare” or the “predatory look.” It’s the ability to stare into someone else and make her feel as though you’re staring directly into her soul... sizing her up... preparing to DO something to her, though she can only guess at WHAT.

piercing eye contact

This is one of those things that can be extremely effective wielded properly – it can shoot sexual tension through the roof, make you physically intimidating even to men twice your size, and communicate “I mean business” to anyone and everyone like nothing else really can (although it can also send you directly to creepy guy land if you aren’t careful how you deploy it).

Early on in life, I learned that not everyone had this ability – in fact, few did. A high school English teacher of mine described it as “the ability to stare at someone and put fear into his heart just with a look.”

But you can also use it to put warmth, arousal, inspiration, or just about any other emotion into another person’s heart as well.

That same high school English teacher of mine described this as something you either have, or you don’t... but I’ve heard that said about LOTS of things I’ve gone on to learn or teach, and I’d be surprised if this is any different.

I’ve never tried to teach this before because I didn’t really know how to teach it... at least for me personally, it’s something I’ve always had (from the day I was born, according to the stories).

However, in the interest of giving it a good crack – because it’s an awesome power if you can attain it – I’d like to try.

Her Sexual Availability? Vital to YOUR Sexual Success


I think that one of the most under-discussed topics in seduction is sexual availability.

What is sexual availability? Sexual availability is not only whether or not a girl has other men in her life (which she does 90% of the time), but also the extent to which she is satisfied with consistently having sex with one or more of these men.

sexual availability

It doesn’t matter if you have the tightest game. It doesn’t matter if you’re an extremely high-value man. If you don’t understand sexual availability, you will experience much more frustration and confusion toward women than is at all necessary.

So today I’m going to outline and explain this concept, and more importantly: delve into why it’s important.