Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

How to Become Selfish in Life


how to be selfishSelfishness has never been a glorified trait among humanity. Caring chiefly about one’s own needs is frequently named as one of the greatest threats to society and causes of degeneration and degradation within it.

After all, a selfish man is supposed to be a guy who offers nothing to society. He’s nothing but some leech that cares about himself, and he’ll go to great lengths just to put down others so he can stay on top.

…Right?

Au contraire. Used in the wrong capacity, sure, selfishness could certainly hurt others. However, being selfish, in of itself, is not bad. Thinking about it as a negative trait, however, may certainly be introducing a daily dose of cognitive dissonance to your life.

Such dissonance comes to the fore as you finally realize the inevitable fact that everyone has selfish tendencies.

We all aim to promote ourselves first, followed by others. Throw a big steak in front of you while you’re starving, and have the option to leave it there for someone else or die, and you’re eating that steak.

Survival is coded into our biology.

However, society promotes the idea that leaving the steak would be more admirable. Promoting ourselves over others is bad, and we should instead seek to help others over ourselves.

The conflict between society’s vaunted ideal of selflessness versus your biological desire to tend to your own needs mounts and builds, and eventually people are left attempting to help each other become better, but never helping themselves become better, even though they are the only ones who can do so.

And that, my friends, leads us in a perfect circle of solving nothing.

Does Seduction Only Work on Sluts?


seduction slutsWe recently moderated yet another comment where the comment author (a woman this time, though we get both men and women doing this) weighed in with something like, “I think this only works on women who aren’t as strict about who they sleep with or are more sexually open.”

We get comments like this sometimes.

The non-politically correct way of saying what she just said, of course, is, “This only works on sluts.”

This is a pretty common viewpoint among first-time readers of seduction-related materials, male and female alike. They read it; it grates with their belief systems; and they respond back stating that they’re pretty sure this only works on XYZ category of women that does not include them (or does not include the women that they date or want to date or have a crush on if they’re male).

And they make the statement that, “This only works on sluts,” and feel much better about themselves.

There, says the woman, now everyone knows that *I* am not a slut, and this would never work on *me*.

At last, says the man, someone has set the record straight, and shown these people that women like my precious Esmeralda would NEVER go for a man like this.

Yet, out of the black-and-white polarities of the all-text Internet, the real world is far more nuanced than those who would polarize womankind into “good girls” and “sluts” would have you (and themselves) believe.

What Are Women Looking For? The Top 10 Things


A topic that surfaces among men of all skill levels is understanding what women are looking to get out of their lives. It seems like women are much more fleeting with their greater desires than men are.

However, there are some general themes that I believe dictate how women act in their daily lives and in the long term. Women expect many things, and they are looking for a lot of fulfillment in their lives.

women looking for

And one great source of that fulfillment can be a good man. Or more specifically, you. So I want to talk about what women are looking for in general, and then frame the actual top ten list in terms of how women expect men to fit into the overall scheme of their lives.

Girls Chase News: Comments, Colt's Program, & More


Howdy, gents,

A few quick updates on the site so you're all patched in:


Summer Fashion For Men: Your A to Z Guide to Looking Sexy in Summertime


Note from Chase: this is a guest post from Darius B. over on Sexy Style for Joe. Darius has really overdelivered here putting together a comprehensive and classy post on getting your summer style tightened up exceedingly well to make you look stylish, attractive, and put-together. This our second post devoted exclusively to men’s fashion, after our 2013 piece, “Fashion for Men: The Primer on Looking Amazing.” If you’re ready to get suited up for summer and get yourself looking crisp and sexy, this article from Darius will leave you in excellent shape. Here’s Darius.


Can you feel it? Summer is getting closer and the weather is getting warmer every day. Well, even if you can’t feel it yet, I’m sure you’ve noticed how sexy women look on those beautiful days when they drop layers upon layers of unnecessary clothing and swap their sweaters and jeans for light, almost see-through sundresses. Ah… just writing about it makes my imagination go wild.

But what about us, men? The signature tight dress shirt and blazer or coat with a scarf to accessorize that used to get the job done in making us look sexy as hell is not exactly a comfortable option on warmer days, as we’d be sweating like a shy teenager on his first date.

We also don’t really have a clothing equivalent to what sundresses and cut off shorts are to women. The best the fashion industry has managed to come up with are shorts that either look very unflattering on most physiques or that are straight up lame and make even male models look asexual.

And so, is it possible for us to dress on the hot summer days in a way that make women go “Wow, who’s that guy?”?

Yes. Though summer brings a set of challenges to dressing sexy as a man, it also enables us to go for a bit more of a raw, sexual look, without appearing try-hard.

This article in turn is about giving you some ideas on great styles of clothing for summer and helping you build outfits that will not only look very sexy on you, but will also feel comfortable. We’ll start off with some core concepts, followed by some tips on picking (or not picking) specific items, then sum it all up with some practical examples you could model.

Should You Be Lovers… or Friends?


friends or loversWhile growing up, women always meant one thing to me: girlfriend material. Women were always potential lovers; never once did it slip into my mind that I could be friends with them.

It wasn’t until I started racking up lovers that I felt the need to slot women into particular roles in my life. I couldn’t (and didn’t) want to sleep with every woman that came into my life, because some women ended up becoming a bigger headache than they were worth as lovers.

However, I began to realize the importance and utility that a mutual friendship could produce. High status women are excellent for social fulfillment, preselection, and they can help you get a closer look at how women act on a daily basis.

Unfortunately, I ran into quite the conundrum. I would harmlessly flirt with women, only to find myself sleeping with them and having our friendships break down. Women would seek sex from me, and I would give it to them, thinking we could still be friends afterwards.

After all, it was just sex.

As I quickly began to realize, I was ruining potential friendships and potential lovers by flipping in between definite roles. The relationships were in some weird middle of the road status, and things would become awkward in a hurry when neither of us knew how to proceed.

What was the underlying problem for me?

I wasn’t defining our relationships roles from the outset. The perpetual chaos that ensues in this situation works against producing stable relationships and causes them to break down. I lost plenty of women because of my indecisiveness, and you could too if you don’t know where each woman belongs in your life.

Coming Out on Top: Power Struggles in Your Relationships


In the piece on Dale Carnegie’s advice, a commenter asked about dealing with power struggles:

Hey Chase this is a great article. Could you do an article about how to handle power struggles in friendships? I find it really has to do with investment. For example, my friend wants me to meet him somewhere, but I want him to meet me. Its like five minutes away, but its a power struggle thing. I get really annoyed when people do this because I’d like to have friends who don’t try to make things a competition like this. But I also have learned from this site that everyone is like this. Can you help me out?

In the end, power struggles are always about the same thing, whether they’re in your romantic or sexual relationships, or your platonic ones – and I’ll cover all of these and everything else in the scope of this article.

power struggles

There’s little more frustrating than having to deal with the relationship equivalent of guerilla warfare, but this is exactly what power struggles are – someone using frame control attempts, passive aggression, moral superiority and other forms of social subterfuge to undermine your position and climb the social ladder to a position above you in the hierarchy.

Not fun at all... and frequently quite draining.

So let’s talk about how power struggles come about, and what you can do once you realize you’re in one.

How to Know When Women Like You


women like youYou meet a really cute girl at an event or out on the street. You know right off the bat that she’s the kind of girl who gives you butterflies in your stomach. She smiles at you. You exchange pleasantries. You vaguely reference how the two of you should get together sometime. She giggles and agrees. She gives you her number and says to contact her sometime. The two of you part ways.

You walk away with a foolish grin on your face. You feel great about the interaction. Then suddenly… the feeling starts to wear away. Doubt starts to creep into your mind.

“Wait… did she actually like me or was she just being nice. Does she know that I want to go out with her or does she just expect to meet up to talk about business stuff?”

And then you let those doubts seep into the next interaction you have with her. Maybe you come off a bit too needy when you text her. Maybe you’re too friendly and not sexy enough the next time you see her in person.

And you lose a girl who you could’ve had a great connection with… just because you didn’t know that the girl liked you. You couldn’t be sure of your ability to read the signs and you couldn’t be certain that the girl was attracted.

Has this ever happened to you before? I bet it has.

Sometimes, even when you’re pretty sure that a girl likes you, the lack of certainty can actually prevent you from making something happen. And then you end up frustrated or regretful. Maybe months or years later the girl even tells you that she liked you and was waiting for you to make the right move.

Well, I’m going to show you how to put yourself in the position to make the right move. I’m going to show you all of the things to look for so that you’ll never have to wonder whether or not she actually likes you again.

What Should Your Standards Be When Picking Up Women?


A note about this article: Many have requested me to write more about sexual prizing (how to use it practically in the field), and I will of course write about that. However, believe it or not, it is a rather complex topic, which means that I need to cover certain basics to form the ground work for a good delivery of “sexual prizing” as a technique. This post is one of those. So do hold on, it will all come with time; I just don’t want to rush into it. Instead, I prefer taking it slow and making sure to cover the necessary basics before delivering the goods. In the long run I believe this will be best for the readers.


Hi everyone. I hope you are all doing great and progressing and enjoying your journey within the art of seduction.

I am first of all truly sorry for being a little inactive these days, as April and May are when I am the busiest during the year. Things should get back to normal after June, when you can expect more participation and articles from me.

Either way, today we will address a topic that is not rocket science to most of us. So to those rocket scientists here, I may be about to disappoint you. However, I believe you will still enjoy this post regardless of it not having any super complicated parts to assemble, because it covers some very important basics.

And basics are important in order to create a good foundation for the more advanced and tricky stuff. The topic of the day will be standards – in other words, your requirements for you to be willing to sleep with a girl.

sexual standards

I will first of all cover what I mean by having standards, then I will further discuss why having standards is good, and finally cover how having standards can effect your outer game and make you appear even more attractive.

It should be pointed out that most of the great seducers out there have standards. Usually, but not always, the better they are (and the greater their options with women), the more standards of some sort they have.

So let us now discuss this topic in depth.

How to Give a Girl (Amazing) Oral Sex: 4 Simple Steps


how to give a girl oral sexA reader asks:

Hey Chase, any quick tips on performing oral sex on girls and stimulating the clit specifically? I checked out the other articles but I couldn't get anything specific on the subject.

We seem to get asked this one a lot... and always on articles that have nothing to do with sex. So let's address it: how to give a girl oral sex.

This is one a lot of men seem to struggle with, but you may be relieved to know it's actually much simpler to learn how to give a girl orgasms through oral sex than it is to learn how to give her orgasms via penetration.

There's no rhythm you must learn to be good.

You needn't exhaust yourself heaving your body back and forth.

You won't even have to learn about the g-spot, the deep spot, the vaginal back wall, or Ricardus's “r-spot” from his article on how to be a good lover.

In fact, all you need to make a girl orgasm from oral is a little patience... and a willing tongue.

And, of course, my 4 simple steps.

WARNING: this one is not safe for work... there is one section below where words do not suffice, and graphics simply are needed. So make sure there's nobody around you can get in trouble with for looking at clitoris pictures before you proceed (and if there is... what are you doing reading an article about oral sex at work, anyway).