Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

11 Mindsets and Mentalities Master Pick Up Artists Use (and 3 They Avoid)

Denton Fisher's picture

pickup artist mindset
Successful pick up artists treat their outings very differently from how most men do. This includes mindsets on rejection, ‘the zone’, panning for gold, and more.

Beliefs have a strange way of becoming truth.

Ever since I started on my journey of seduction mastery, I was told time and again that if I could only think how successful guys thought, I would get the same results. Well, I’ve come to find there is a lot of truth in this. So today I want to teach you a few of those essential mindsets that make a man phenomenal at getting new women.

Many of the thoughts going through your head that are counterproductive to success with women will not change from practice in the field. I have seen too many guys go out night after night simply to reinforce the thoughts that make their nights go south. And of course they can’t recognize the ill effects and negative feedback loops.

We’ve all heard self-help gurus talk about self-fulfilling prophecies: whatever you believe will happen will happen, causing your perception of how the world works to be reinforced. So when it comes to changing your thoughts, know that a lot of the work is going to come during your quiet time when you can sit down and visualize a night when you use the incredible tools I am about to give you.

Are You a Unique, Special Individual? You're Probably Missing the Basics

Chase Amante's picture

unique special
Sometimes you don’t want to follow the instructions. The instructions are for other folks, not you! But if you still aren’t getting results, maybe it’s time to change things up.

Over the years, we’ve seen myriad guys come and go who struggle with a specific problem. These guys are among the most frustrated folks we see at Girls Chase. Not only are they frustrated themselves, but they frustrate everyone who tries to help them, too.

You see, what they want is a magic pill. They want you to tell them how to do everything you teach guys how to do – only they want you to teach them to do it faster and easier than how you teach all those other guys how to do it.

It doesn’t matter how fast the method you’re teaching is. It could take two weeks to work; they’d still want to know how to do it in four days. When you finally persuade them to put the work in, they take a couple of half-hearted shots at it, all their dreams don’t instantly come true, and they give up. It’s too hard, they’re too unmotivated they say. Then they want you to motivate them. Or, even better, give them some kind of shortcut you haven’t told them about before.

We’ve seen it a lot on the discussion boards. Some of the guys we banned in 2017 were long-time members who kept asking for magic pills, chafing at the suggestion when other members suggested they start with the basics, then whined about how hard it was and how unfair their situations were.

And I wondered to myself: “What the heck is these guys’ problems? Why can’t they just do the work and quit whining about it? Why do they ask for magic pills over and over and over again? They’ve GOT all my stuff – and all everybody else’s stuff – right here on the darn site!”

Sure, there’s a lot of material here, and it can be hard to know where to start. That’s why we have the quiz and our programs, though. Both of those are condensed information that takes you through a guided process. There’s also the newbie assignment on the boards, which only takes 14 days and a little courage to do. We have paths for guys who are new and want to start getting results. But some guys don’t take them – then not only don’t they follow the paths we’ve laid out for them, but they continue to complain about not getting results anyway. What’s going on with people like this?

Well, as it turns out, a piece of scientific research fresh off the presses (published at the end of December) has figured out what’s going on with people who do this.

Tactics Tuesdays: Do You Command, Suggest, or Request Her Compliance?

Hector Castillo's picture

compliance request
You want a girl to do something. So what do you do – suggest she do it, request her to do it, or command her to do it? Each can have very different outcomes.

It feels manly to order people around and command their compliance. Women respect and admire a man who can order others around. Even if doing so is not always the most tactful of moves, it’s the more dominant move, since it is the most effortless. You are not visibly considering the feelings of others or trying to avoid conflict; you are asserting your power plainly and without fear.

Given the popularity of egalitarianism in our modern societies, the rough, commanding element of traditional masculinity has been demonized.

However, this is a trick. You’ve been sold the idea that people don’t like order and being ordered.

This is both true and false.

It is true that people would rather be in charge – if they could be. Everyone wants to be at the top – if it was easy.

But it’s not, so most people choose a different tactic: trick people into not even fighting each other. Dominate through convincing others that domination is shameful, brutal, and archaic.

Machiavellian tactics at their finest.

Surely, you won’t be as proportionally liked as you would if you were more commanding and dominant, but you would be more respected and get what you want more often. Also, you would, if you became legendary, be liked more by sheer quantity than if you were to stay in your lane. This is the trade-off. You’re more likely to be liked if you’re soft, but this is only because you don’t pose a threat.

This is what was behind my series on self-respect and the ego/self. Those who shame or criticize the self and ego are nothing more than misguided softies at best, and wolves convincing you to don sheep-wool at worst.

However, the vast majority of humanity being soft, compliant, and submissive indicates that people do like order, or at least prefer it over other real-world alternatives.

Allow me to put it bluntly – if someone keeps doing something, he prefers it. I don’t care how harmful, unhealthy, or disturbing the behavior, if someone keeps doing it, he likes it more than whatever else is available. If someone is lazy, fat, and unambitious, he prefers to be that way, because the prospect of being driven, in-shape, and prideful sounds harsher than the occasional shortness of breath, erectile dysfunction, lack of financial independence, and TGIF mentality.

Social concerns are very powerful drivers of preference. The scariest consequence for most people is that others won’t like them.

2017: The Year in Review (Plus What's in Store for 2018)

Chase Amante's picture

year in review 2017
We review what changed and what content went up in 2017. And we look forward to what you can expect from Girls Chase throughout the next year.

So that’s it. 2017’s a wrap! I hope it’s been an excellent year for you. It’s been another very solid year for Girls Chase. 2018 should be a fairly revolutionary one I think (with article tracks and with One Date – which we’re finally ready to launch – plus more awesome things we’ve got in the works for you)... but we’ll get to that in the second half of this post.

Before we do, we’ll review the year that’s just wrapped, and all the content posted therein.

As in past year-end reviews (2013, 2014, 2015, 2016), we’ll discuss what’s changed this year at Girls Chase. We’ll talk overall posting statistics for you numbers guys. We’ll link you up to some of the best articles of this past year, as judged by comment counts, page views, and editorial opinion.

And then we’ll talk about what’s to come in the next year – our tenth year online.

Let’s plunge in.

Where to Touch a Girl to Turn Her On: The Finger Routine

Pablo Garcia's picture

where to touch a girl
Where do you touch a girl to turn her on? Upper arm ➡ shoulders ➡ neck and ears ➡ cleavage. How do you touch her? With the Finger Routine.

Hey, guys. I truly hope you are doing well.

I must first apologize for having been inactive lately with writing articles. But I have not been inactive in the field. In fact, today is the first Saturday night since the summer that I’ve been home writing instead of out picking up girls.

My wingman and fellow Girls Chase writer, Alek Rolstad, has requested that I share a juicy technique on how and where to touch a girl to turn her on. This technique has gotten me a lot of success. So here it is!

One of my areas of expertise in seduction happens to be physical escalation. The “move” covered in this post is extremely powerful, and it will allow you to accomplish so many things. I will of course cover the mechanisms behind it as well as other practical matters related to its use.

The best part of this technique is that, despite its raw power, it is extremely easy to pull off. I believe that beginning, intermediate, and advanced players will benefit from this post (Alek has been using this technique almost every night, too). No matter your level, you can pull this off.

Another thing to note is that this technique can work in all situations where physical escalation is appropriate:

Using Social Proof to Get Laid: A Report (with Demonstrations)

Alek Rolstad's picture

how to use social proof to get laid
Alek demonstrates how to build and use social proof to pick up a girl in a nightclub. See loads of social proof building examples and demonstrations on the way to the pickup.

Hey, guys. I’m finishing this year off with a report that will cover an event that took place last weekend. The idea here is to give you a story that will be entertaining, present some techniques, and give you an example of how they are used in real life.

Here at Girls Chase, we cover a lot of techniques, new ideas, new tricks, and solutions to issues you face in your dating life. However, in some cases, reports can be useful in order to demonstrate:

  • The context in which the techniques are used

  • How many techniques are used over the course of a night, and how they contribute

  • Which techniques fit different situations (how to analyze the situation and decide which techniques to use)

  • Which techniques work well with others

  • How it all comes together in a seduction

This can be a great addition to the actual posts covering the original concepts shared on this website. It helps put things into perspective.

For this occasion, I will be using the following techniques and strategies:

These will be the main concepts applied in this report. Things like opening, escalation, and other basics will of course be applied, too.

I know many of you are fans of my sex talk and were hoping for me to give you one of those reports. I will try to make more of those. The reason I chose this subject is because serious verbal seduction requires you to be able to talk without too much interruption. Where I live, the smoking areas tend to allow for that. Unfortunately, during the winter, it is too cold to do this outside, which means I have to stick to indoor club game, which makes sex talk difficult. I also think variation in the content of my reports is a good thing. Previously, we covered sexual tension; before that, we covered a typical verbal seduction night, and so on. Today we will focus on “social game,” although I will use some sexual gambits!

On the night in question, I was wearing black Chelsea boots (must have), a black sweater, a long necklace, a red bomber jacket with some cool “Chinese dragon” prints, and tight black jeans. With my long hair, I looked like a 70s rockstar.

A bit of background on the night: I was in this venue till 2am, and I left as a result of some drama with one of my girls. I had to let her go, which kinda sucked. In other words, my mood was not great. However, when shit like this happens, the best call is to venue change (go somewhere else). This report takes place in the new venue.

How to Build a Harem, Pt 1: Queen Theory

Varoon Rajah's picture

queen theory
In Part 1 of the harem series, we talk about Queen Theory: how women position themselves as long-term partners and jockey for roles and status.

Having created a constantly evolving harem for the past three years running multi-dating relationships, as well as having dated some of these women for 3+ YEARS in this arrangement, it’s time to share with you a series of articles that covers my experience and lessons learned.

So if you’ve been considering such relationships, or you’ve been experimenting with them but have run into issues, this series is for you. We’ll cover all the facets of dating several women at a time (i.e., any relationship non-monogamous in nature), and we’ll go over what it takes to do so successfully and with minimal drama.

To begin, we will cover the first of three biggest concerns in a woman’s dating life. Those concerns are:

  1. Catching and keeping the top man

  2. Her self-interest

  3. Her reputation

Women use the social and sexual marketplaces to advance their own agenda. Thus all these factors are important.

The way to handle the first concern is to understand all the implications of Queen Theory, which is the focus of this article.

A few months ago, I wound up in a threesome with one of my multiple long-term relationship (mLTR) girlfriends and her girl friend. My girlfriend had an event one Sunday, to which she invited me and two of her girl friends. I met her there and proceeded to grab drinks. Over the course of the event, one of her girl friends took a liking to me, and I took a liking to her.

I cleared my intention with my girlfriend before giving both girls a ride home. But instead of them going home, we ended up at my place. Long story short, one thing led to another and we started to get into a threesome.

Everything was going perfectly. I was watching and playing with two sexy women while they played with each other. Eventually, after having our fun, we all fell asleep together – me in between these two sexy girls.

In the morning around 5:00am, I started to feel horny, and my girlfriend motioned me to play with her while the friend slept. I tried my best but just couldn’t get hard. In that moment, I actually desired the other girl, not my girlfriend. Needless to say, I stopped trying after failing for a little while, then went back to sleep.

An hour or so later, I started escalating on the friend, and my girlfriend went to the bathroom. I then started shagging the friend, but when my girlfriend got back, she was very annoyed. She said “ahem,” indicating for me to stop. Once the friend left a little later, my girlfriend and I didn’t have sex; instead, we spent the next hour going over what happened and my feelings for her and the friend. I was forced to handle some drama and her concerns that I didn’t value my girlfriend sexually like I did the new girl.

While I submitted to her frame (honestly, I probably shouldn’t have; I gave her too much power there), I learned how important it is to understand Queen Theory.

Queen Theory in a nutshell:

  • Every woman who is dating a man in an emotional capacity wants to feel like she’s the #1 woman in his life. Always.

  • No woman wants to share her man emotionally. Always.

Secrets to Getting Girls: Make Invites

Chase Amante's picture

make invitesYou talk to a girl on a street somewhere and you reach that ‘moment’. She smiles, you smile. She looks at you with expectation.

Invite her to do something!

You’re with a girl in a bar and it reaches that lull where it hasn’t gone bad but has grown stale. And now the pressure on you to entertain or interest her begins to mount.

Don’t entertain her; invite her to do something!

You meet a group of cool people at a party and hit it off. There’s a cool guy and some real cute girls in the group. They like to talk to you and you like to talk to them, but it seems like nothing will happen with them.

Stop waiting for them to take charge. Invite them to do something yourself!

Invite her, invite her, invite them. Invite people. If you hit it off with a girl, make invites. If you click with cool people, make invites.

If you want a social or romantic future with any person you meet, make invites.

Tactics Tuesdays: How to be Mindful (and Learn 10x Faster)

Chase Amante's picture

how to be mindful
When you set out to form new habits and self-improve, a big part of this is how to remember to make these adjustments in the first place.

Reader Kalyan writes in with a question about learning fundamentals:

hey, i just noticed that your website lacks a very important article (or maybe i dont know of it. if thats the case please send me link(s)). i know fundamentals are important. and everyone knows eye contact is important for example.. but i find it very hard to consistently remember to consciously focus on eye contact... i feel because of that, mastering individual fundamentals like that is much slower. so, an article about how to learn or focus on fundamentals would be helpful. i know its a good idea to work on one aspect at a time, but how could you actually remember to work on even one thing when youre out and talking to women?

It’s an interesting question, and in fact is one more concerned with mindfulness – the act of attunement to what is occurring both around you and within your head in the present moment – than the pure raw process of learning fundamentals.

The process of learning fundamentals themselves is straightforward:

  1. Pick a fundamental to work on, be that eye contact, posture, vocal intonation, or another

  2. Decide what to alter or improve in this fundamental

  3. Make that alteration/improvement over and over across the next 30-90 days

  4. Every time you notice yourself not doing it the way you want to do it, correct yourself

  5. After 1-3 months (and many hundreds of internal reminders) have passed, it’s now automatic

This process can transform you into a man with impeccable, powerful body language, mannerisms, and behavior in a relatively short time (six months to a year for really complete change; though you’ll start to see the effects of this exercise as soon as you begin work on it).

Yet you must remember to remind yourself to adopt these better fundamentals to change them.

What if you can simply never remember to do it?

How to Have Sex with Hippie and Hipster Girls

Hector Castillo's picture

sex with hipsters
Hippie and hipster girls might seem a little kooky or out there. But they’re still interested in men, dating, and sex – you just need the right approach.

If there’s any demographic of women I’ve always been good with, it’s hippies and hipsters.

The two categories are quite close to each other, as they’re both non-normative, but they have slightly different ways of demonstrating their alleged non-conformity.

Hippie chicks are more extreme. They tend to travel a lot and rarely have stable jobs, or they often work low-end retail jobs to satisfy the need to socialize without too much work. They can drift for weeks or months on end. They also might eschew normal feminine habits, like wearing makeup, shaving, etc. One hippie chick I slept with, who had both hairy armpits and a full bush, told me her most recent job was making mermaid tails and selling them. She was surprisingly pretty, had a great body, and the sex was very, very nice.

Hipsters are the less-extreme version of hippies. Instead of completely dismissing society, they tend to express their rebelliousness in the following ways:

  • Tattoos

  • Dyed hair

  • Lots of piercings – the bigger and more grotesque, the more rebellious she is (the bull ring is the black belt of a hipster or alternative girl)

  • Alternative music

  • Active in the EDM (electronic dance music) scene

  • Music festivals

  • Extreme sexual liberation

  • Hang out at “alternative” venues (not super-popular spots)

  • More masculine than your average girl (does boxing, MMA, CrossFit, etc.)

  • Smoking weed and usually doing lots of party drugs like Molly

None of these traits in particular make a girl “alternative,” but having enough of them makes it very clear she’s trying to express to the world that she doesn’t “abide by its rules.”

The big point here is that she’s trying to be vocal about her rebellion. She wants everyone to know how she feels about the world around her.

What you may notice quickly through experience or contemplation is that they’re not really so different from any other girl; they just have some unique hobbies and characteristics.

In the end, however, they’re still girls.

And they like men, even men who are not anything like them – sometimes, especially if they’re not like them – since many of the men in their cliques can be quite effeminate and submissive because of their ideologies, though that can be said of most men in most social circles.

I think the biggest factor that keeps guys from sleeping with pretty and hot hippies and hipsters is simply that they don’t hang out where these women do. And I assume that if they do come in contact with these wild creatures, they tend to auto-reject these women because they’re from vastly different worlds.