Pickup

Nightclubs are a sea of stimulation for girls. And you can lose them if you let them grow TOO stimulated. So how do you keep control?

Hi everyone. Last week I discussed how states affects women in night clubs. Today I will discuss why focusing only on buying temperature – i.e. making her excited and horny, can often be a bad solution in clubs.

It is commonly believed that in clubs it is all about making her horny and excited – you need to be bold, physical and fast. It is absolutely possible to get laid by doing so, but oftentimes it is because the luck factor kicks in.

Unaware of this many clubbers believe this is the best way to get laid, because it worked a few times and it seemed so easy, only to discover that their upcoming outings where not as consistent as they had hoped for.  They will get make outs, but the girls will just run away and either just disappear or she might not as into your anymore or worse she might hook up with somebody else. How frustrating, right?

However, before one truly gets really demotivated, they tend to rationalize their failure with “just being unlucky” and they tend to persist hoping to finally score the girl. I have seen this happen so much. Now even though this can work if they play the numbers game for long enough, it is not ideal.

There are cases where focusing on buyers temperature – i.e. making her horny and stimulated (usually by escalating physically) actually worked, and I will get to that later. Let me first cover why only focusing on stimulus is so often be a bad idea.

You know how vital it is to pick a venue with the kinds of girls you want. But how do different venues influence a girl’s openness to various things?

Venue selection is crucial to making your days and nights out go better.

Pick the right venue, and you can leave with a girl’s phone number (or with her arm-in-arm)... Even if your fundamentals aren’t yet too tight and your game needs work.

Pick the wrong venue, and no matter how smooth and attractive a fellow you are, it’s like riding a bicycle through a salt marsh.

So how do you know what the right venue is?

Alek’s discussed this topic already in his article on venue selection:

• Picking Up Girls: Selecting the Right Venu e
  

... and I’ve discussed it somewhat in my ebook on it and my article on bars and clubs:

• Finding Your Niche
• How to Pick Up Girls in Bars and Clubs
  

Today, I want to talk about a somewhat different aspect of venue selection: I want to discuss how to pick the right venue for your style of game and your preferred type of interaction.

Girls will tell you they don’t like guys who are dicks. But they do. They really do. And with these 24 ways to be a dick to them, they will LOVE you.

Welcome back.

In the Part I of my "lovable dick" series, I explained a very important paradigm:

That being nice to a girl isn't always the nicest thing to do. In fact, sometimes she wants you to be a prick.

Why? Because she needs to know you have standards of behavior. And also, because she wants you to treat her like a little girl and not take her too seriously.

Now that I've thoroughly explained why being a dick is so attractive to women, and in what scenarios, here're 24 ways to make sure she knows that you're ACTUALLY a nice guy (i.e., you'll give her what she wants).

The chaotic atmosphere of nightclubs makes them perfect to build sexual state in – and equally perfect to lose it. To succeed in clubs you must be able to beat the risks.

Last time we discussed the role of sexual state and how you can generate it. Today we will focus on how to use sexual state to your advantage: how the communication of your sexual state (for example physical escalation) affects women, the different factors that can affect your delivery both positively and negatively, and how to best deal with those factors.

In order to avoid confusing you, this thread will focus on communicating sexual intent.

Your sexual state lets you communicate your sexual intentions. You do this either by talking about sex, or non-verbally, by, for example, physical escalation - a concept you'll recognize from seduction literature as "vibing."

You do not need to be in a sexual state to communicate sexual intent - but it definitely helps. Read my previous article about how to enter a sexual state.

This article will cover the different factors that affect your delivery. Keep in mind that some of these factors can affect each other. They are not distinct categories but rather "blurry" components in a model of how things work in real life. If you aren't a technical guy, just consider this a post on escalation and the different factors that come into play when escalating.

Let's start out by discussing a situation factor...

Want an easy way to get girls to come join you on an instant date or back home? This advanced invite works even if she’s on the fence.

One of my favorite invites is the “come join me” invite. It’s flexible, fun... and surprisingly nuanced.

I actually spent years experimenting with this invite, with it often falling flat. It took me the longest time to pinpoint what the problem I was having was, too.

I’d chat with a girl, it’d go great, and then it’d be time to change venues or invite her home. And I’d say:

Me: Hey, I’m going to go [do whatever]. Come join me.

And the girl I was talking to would nearly always respond with:

Her: Thank you, but I think I’m going to just [go do whatever].

Occasionally I’d get a “yes” or a “yeah, okay, sure.” But most of the time she’d beg off.

And then one day I figured it out.

She’s over there, but you feel so nervous about going up to meet her. Maybe she’ll reject you; maybe she won’t be nice. There are a few things to realize if you feel this way, though.

What could you achieve with women if you were fearless?

Think of all the things you could have done and said.

I myself did not start off doing this void of emotion. It used to be so bad for me that I would shake uncontrollably from just the thought of approaching a random person. Everyone has felt this way to varying levels of potency at one point in their life or another. So what is there to do?

You will never completely rid yourself of this. Over time it will dissipate more and more but it will always be there. Yet you can elevate yourself from it. I personally have come a long way from where I used to be. From my meager one approach a week to now being able to approach on command whenever I want.

How do I do this? Needless to say it is not because I conquered my fear but instead because I learned to approach in spite of it. And you can too. You can go into a venue feeling out of it and leave it feeling like a god consistently by taking on the right mindsets and actions. What are they?

A girl who’s in auto-rejection gets cold and snubs you. To turn it around and effect a recovery, you must use this 4-step formula.

This is a firefighting post.

I say that because if you do things right you won’t have to fix anything. But we all make mistakes.

On my article about screening girls for same-day lays, a reader asks:

“About that girl giving massive iois and i didnt approach due to exams coming up.. Its difficult to go into social mode when you have your head in books all day since over a month. And to top it all off, she has gone cold.. typical auto rejection, which is my main sticking point for sometime now. She gave me massive blatant in my face AIs but i failed to take action. Price paid. Very frustrating. I have read all your articles on auto rejection.

[...]

Please come up with some technique to turn around auto rejection as its seems impossible once girls go in that territory. You advised value boosts and preselection to turn around auto rejections but would not those make us seem more unattainable and worsening auto rejection as she sees me with other girls and thinks she wasnt good enough? Thoughts?

I was reading your old forum posts and you said not to accept responisbility for her reactions as it make you seem weak. What in this situation when her ego is hurt? Will accepting responsibility that i wanted to come talk to her earlier but could not due to exams better the situation or worsen it? Or should i blame it all on her that its difficult to approach you as you have a lot of security around? ;) (Her parents or brothers are chaperoning her mostly). How about opening with i know i should have come earlier but.. ‘launching into reasons’? This seems like obsessing but i just want to get your take on it.

Is it better to go in as soon as you sense a girl is auto rejecting or give a time gap and re-engage later? And is it possible to turn around their opinions of yourself after ghosting for a while or once its set they see you that way whole life no matter what.. even years later?

Why doesn’t chasing work when the girl is AR? Shouldn’t her hurt ego feel relieved as being chased is an ego boost?”

Auto-rejection. If you’ve just tuned in, that’s when a girl feels like she can’t get you... So rejects you before you reject her. It’s a response that lets her shield her ego from a guy she thinks doesn’t like or respect her.

It’s also one of the hardest issues to fix. Particularly if you’ve just met.

Yet, there’s opportunity there too. Because if you can fix the mistake, her passion for you goes through the roof.