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Pickup

Meeting and attracting members of the opposite sex.

10 Ways Guys Waste Time In-Venue (and Don’t Meet Girls)

waste time in bars
Do you go out to meet girls, but just waste time? Here are the 10 most common ways guys twiddle thumbs instead of collect digits.

Think about the last time you went out to meet girls: did you waste any time?

Did you waste a lot of time?

Of that last outing of yours, how much time did you actually spend meeting women, versus... Not meeting women?

This isn’t to say you need to be an approach machine. And it’s perfectly fine, healthy, and normal to go out with friends just to go out with friends, or even to go to the bar just to have a drink and be around people. But if your objective is to meet women, there are a lot of ways you can waste time... And a lot of ways you can turn a promising night into a big, fat zero.

This article’s primarily aimed at picking up girls in bars and clubs, but much of the advice in here is applicable to day game as well (and I’ll use day game examples along with night game ones).

So, if you want to be more aware of things you do to procrastinate and delay, instead of meet your future naked bedmate, here are 10 of the most egregious ones guys are guilty of.

Preselection: The Deadliest Style of Game

preselection
You can use preselection to “trade up” with girls in a venue. In this way, you go from “cute” girls, to “hot” ones… To outright stunners.

What is preselection?

For those of you who are new to Girls Chase, think of it like this. If a stranger walked up to you and asked you for a favor, would you be more likely to do it if the guy was seemingly homeless or was wearing a suit and tie?

In a way, the same thing is true for women when it comes to attraction. Girls are looking for proof that you are a guy who is good with women (aka a man of value), and what better evidence of that is there than you being seen around other attractive women?

There are enough articles on this subject, so I will not bore you veterans with the details. If this is the first time you’ve come across this concept, all you need to know is that for those top tier women, being a guy who is great with women is paramount to getting them.

My game hinges on this idea. When I am out trying to take a girl home, it is my job to manufacture this so I can cash out on the hottest girl I possibly can. By the end of the night, I ideally want everyone to love me and every girl to be attracted to me – and when the time is right, choose my ideal girl out of the lot, and take her. Welcome to the deadliest style of game.

How to Reduce or Eliminate Rejection by Girls

eliminate rejection
You can reduce or eliminate rejection with a few simple adjustments. #1, test the water first. #2, approach in passing – and get rejected in passing too.

Hey guys. I hope you are doing great. I have had the luxury of time to head out regularly again. And whenever this happens, I tend to make observations – sometimes new ones – and sometimes I might be reminded of some interesting phenomenon requiring reflection.

This post, along with my upcoming posts, will be more practical. So I hope you ain’t dropping the field just because of the cold weather, because it is time to get practical... and hopefully you will get dirty.

This time I will discuss some dynamics when it comes to opening in clubs and bars. There are many step-by-step processes one might follow and different ways of opening (the never-ending discussion between direct and indirect opening) that all have their pros and cons.

Tactics Tuesdays: Fixing a Poor Tactical Focus

tactical reset
What happens if you just aren’t getting anywhere with girls? Should you grind it out? No – instead, enter the tactical reset.

Have you ever seen those a guy who tries to learn game, but no matter what, he just can’t get results?

He could spend months – or in the extreme, years – and never progress beyond getting phone numbers from girls (that never lead to dates) or make-outs with them (that never lead to sex).

Hopefully, you haven’t experienced anything quite so bad (the worst-case guys do seem to be a small minority). But maybe you’ve seen some flavor of this... You’ve hit a plateau, tried to grind it out, and just nothing was working. How do you deal with these situations?

In today’s article, I’m going to share with you the approach I’ve found most helpful for resolving this issue: it’s what I call a ‘tactical reset’.

Before we get to that though, let’s talk about why these hang-ups happen.

10 Signs a Place is Great to Meet Girls At

great place to meet girls at
How do you know if a place is good to meet girls at? Look for these 10 signs: girls out-dress guys, girls are fitter than guys, female body art, and more.

In my series on ‘game imbalance hypothesis’ – that some places are easier to meet girls than others, and that harder places train their men to have more skill at bedding and dating women – I discussed how to operate in hard and easy environments. You can read the three articles in the Game Imbalance series below:

  1. Game Imbalance Hypothesis
  2. Navigating Highly Competitive Sexual Markets
  3. Locating Good Low Competition Sexual Markets

Today I wanted to do a follow up post that asks: how else do you recognize if a place is good for meeting girls?

First off, if you haven’t read at least article #3 above, make sure you read that one. I cover a lot of signs there that I won’t go over in this article. This article is more about superficial ‘quick scan’ signs you can look for to make a snap judgment about a place. Article #3 above, on locating low competition markets, digs into the deeper indications a place will be worthwhile (or not). Also be sure to check out Alek Rolstad’s article on choosing the right nighttime spot; if you enjoy nightlife, it’s a must-read.

The ‘quick scan’ signs I’ll go over in this article are all indicators you learn to look for subconsciously once you’ve been at this a while and you’ve grown used to meeting girls in different kinds of environments. They allow you to get a swift feel for the terrain and make a judgment about whether a spot is worth investing your time into, or whether you ought to move on.

I’ve picked up on these over the years as I’ve frequented different venues, different cities, and different cultures and countries. The big benefits of being able to read a situation fast like this is the ability to screen out unproductive locales, but also to endure in productive ones. Due to random variation, sometimes you might strike out the first few girls you approach in what will otherwise be a terrific place for you. If you know it should be good, it’s easier to weather these bumps without writing a place off prematurely.

Notes in mind, let’s get to our ten (10) signs a place is great to meet girls at.

Increase Your Lays, Pt. II: Strategies for 5 Venue Types

venue strategy
Different venues demand different strategies to do well meeting girls in. Each of these 5 different venues needs its own discrete approach.

Last week, we covered 3 different concepts that could help us in developing a seduction strategy for a given night. Keep in mind that our focus is based on cold approach seduction, and that our aim is primarily to increase our odds of getting laid – but also to get a girl we like.

Those 3 concepts were:

  • Increased volume: simply approach more and play the numbers game.

  • Screening: spend more time before the approach, and approach “better leads” instead of just spam approaching. The catch here is that you approach less and therefore risk losing some good leads.

  • Tighter game: more of a long-term strategy – oftentimes seen as an ideal where you approach a girl and manage to go home with her due to tight seduction skills.

Now, the last concept of “tight game” might seem like the most appealing, but it takes a while to actually build those skills. To become super tight, you actually have to put a lot of work into it. And for many men, it leads to a diminishing return – unless you are a freak like me who just happens to be passionate about this stuff. We will also see in this post that there will be scenarios where you simply cannot get away with playing things smoothly – situations where your seductive vibe and smooth verbal skills mean jack all.

If the previous post was about covering concepts, this post is about practical stuff – probably as practical as it can get. We will cover a few different scenarios and see when and where these concepts should be applied.

Now, this is something that you get better at the more experienced you become; however, I hope this can give you some ideas on how this all works out. There is no point in learning the different situations covered in this post by heart, because every situation is different. What I want you to do is to try to understand why I pick certain strategies over others – and if anything is unclear, you have the comment section below to ask questions, and I will clarify things for you.

Let us get right into it and cover some usual scenarios you might face – keep in mind I will both cover night game scenarios as well as day game scenarios.

13 Things Inexperienced Girls Do that Men Mistake for Sluttiness

inexperienced girls
No one’s dating instincts are perfect. Sometimes you’ll think a girl is slutty when the truth is inexperience makes her act too direct.

You don’t realize it until you’re quite experienced with girls, but your instincts – especially as a beginner – don’t always give you the most reliable information.

You see this with a lot of inexperienced men, who end up dating very experienced women, convinced of these girls inexperience and chastity (check out my article on how to gauge a girl’s partner count if you want a better handle on this). Yet the opposite happens too: inexperienced men often write off inexperienced women because they misread these girls’ inexperience as confident experience. Even men who are pretty good with girls often misread these signals.

Today, I’m going to show you 13 things inexperienced women do that cause men to incorrectly assume they are more experienced with men than they are.

There’s a theme running through these 13 things, you might notice. That theme is this: more experienced girls create mystery, build anticipation, and embody a feminine air. Less experienced girls are usually blunt, raw, and over-direct.

Put another way, the more experienced a girl becomes with men, the better able she is to trigger within men the emotions men most enjoy from women. The less experienced she is, the worse she is at this.

Note that none of these are absolutes. There are experienced women who do these things too. However, if you see a girl do two or three or four of these things, you can feel be confident she’s likely inexperienced with men.

That in mind, let’s peel back these 13 things and change how you look at the women you meet.

Increase Your Lays, Pt. I: Three Seduction Strategies

seduction strategies
How can you get laid more and carve more notches on your bedpost? We kick off the series with a look at three (3) seduction strategies.

Hello there. I hope you are all doing great. I plan on making this a two-part post discussing strategies to increase your amount of lays.

Many of us enjoy meeting women in different scenarios – one day you might meet girls in bookstores; on Friday you enjoy heading to a bar; and maybe on Saturday you go to a club.

Maybe you only meet women in clubs, or maybe only during the daytime – that is cool, too; however, note that even the venue that you are familiar with can change from time to time.

For instance, your favorite nightlife venue that is usually energetic enough but not too chaotic can, on one night, become very crowded and messy – like around Halloween. This basically totally changes the scenario. Sometimes you can select venues (being daytime venues or nighttime venues); however, you will never fully be in control of the potential changes. This is why calibration and experience is so key. This series is meant to help you through the process of calibrating to your venues.

The overall idea is to cover different strategies for different scenarios in order to increase the amount of girls in your life. The 3 concepts for making good strategies are:

  • Volume
  • Screening
  • Tight game

We will discuss all 3 – and note that combinations are doable and can oftentimes give amazing success – such as combining screening with tight game, or screening with volume (the sober “drunk n’ horny game”). I am not saying that these are 3 distinct strategies – quite the opposite. You should always have all 3 in mind – and preferably you should approach a few women and always have your game tight. You might also screen out bad leads. What I am trying to say is that there will be scenarios in which you will have to put more focus on one of the concepts.

Along the way, we will discuss the pros and cons of each strategy. And the next post will discuss these concepts in light of different environments, and examine which concepts should get more emphasis as far as making the best strategy for meeting women.

Let us get straight into the first major concept: volume.

Tactics Tuesdays: Treat Her Hot and Horny

hot and horny
Some girls you do well with, some girls not so well. What’s the difference? One of the big ones: do you treat her hot and horny, or not.

This post is probably best suited to men who are intermediate and up with girls. If you’re just starting out, it’s still worth reading to know what mindset to aim for, but you may not be able to implement it just yet if you don’t have at least one type of girl you do well with consistently.

Commenting on my article “When She Picks You, It’s Vital She Feels It’s Her Choice”, a reader named Asian Guy asks:

Hi Chase!

I sort of have a question I have been hoping to find the answer to for a while but am not sure really where to look. I’ve bought your spellbinding book and even looked at a how to date korean women book done by one of your friends. However, to this day I am still not sure how to go after korean women who are raised in a conservative society. As an example, recently I met a korean girl and after going on a few dates with her, she wouldn’t even try to really hug in public. I was told by my korean guy friends that korean girls tend not to do anything touchy feely public. After going out on 4 dates with her, I tried to go to her place (my place not logistically possible). She hemmed and hawed and said something like how she just moved in and her place isn’t ready to have people over.

A lot of the techniques here are literal gold when it comes to american women or americanized asian women, but for asian women from asia, I am still having problems. For example, a lot of times when I propose to go home with a conservative asian girl on the the first or second date, they actually seem to get offended or completely creeped out. This never happens to me with americanized asian girls, who “get” the whole thing. I’ve never been able to date the more conservative ones because they tend to be extremely cautious and the techniques that would normally work for other girls fail here. It seems that they are into a boyfriend candidate all the time. I have tried a lot to disqualify, but these girls seem hard-wired to want a boyfriend, and the moment I disqualify, they are gone.

I was curious if you had any ideas or experiences what to do here. It seems with most conservative asian girls it takes up to 6-9 dates to really go anywhere. I have recognized that there exist a lot of conservative asian girls who do sleep with men fast, but it seems those are the more rebellious type, which you can usually tell. For the ones that tend to stay home, not drink, go to the library, etc, do you have any ideas how or if you would tailor everything?

Thanks Chase!!

First off, although this comment is about girls from Asia (and Korea in particular), it’s a microcosm of a phenomenon men face across their courtships with all girls.

That’s because just like there are men who think Asian girls from Asia are too conservative and too hard to get, there are men who think they’re ridiculously easy. Just like there are men who specialize in deflowering girls who’ve resisted sex with other men for years. And like there are men who think X type of girl is easy, even though other men think X type of girl is impossible.

So, I’m going to answer Asian Guy’s question. But in so doing, I’m also going to give you a tweak to how you approach the girls you approach that, if you implement it, will supercharge your results with them.

3 Common Roadblocks to Seduction Mastery

roadblocks to seduction
As you seek to master the art of seduction, you’ll discover 3 key roadblocks: the first 1000 approaches, wrong practice, and too much faking.

Plateaus are the bane of any skill we seek mastery in, and they are most prominent in learned success with women. These obstructions in the pick-up community are not just speed bumps but full-on roadblocks preventing people from reaching the heights they dream of.

This article is aimed at any guy who wants to get seriously good at meeting girls via cold approach. What are the hurdles? What must you overcome to get there?

In my experience, there are three (3) major roadblocks. I call them:

  1. 1000 approaches,
  2. Deliberate practice, and
  3. Not faking but being.

How can you recognize and defeat each one as efficiently as possible?