Pickup

Meeting and attracting members of the opposite sex.

How to Spike Her Buying Temperature


I do not usually like posting about this kind of stuff, because I feel the more advanced things cater to a very small percentage of guys and I know most benefit more from studying more of the basics.

But, I want to keep everyone awake with something fun, so here is a cool technique I have taken and perfected from one of my mentors. Enjoy!

What I call a ‘Buying Temperature Spike Loop’ (it’s a mouthful, I know!) is a grouping of different techniques put together and arranged to cycle (loop) through to bring forth a reaction from a girl that is in your favor.

Because this is comprised of many different concepts I will go down the line on the mechanics of what makes this loop work; explaining buying temperature, breaks in rapport, compliance, and then at the end I will put it all together and show you what it should look like in practice.

buying temperature

Done properly, what should this technique do?

It should:

  • Build Comfort

  • Build Attraction

  • Build Compliance

  • Get Logical Buy-In

  • Force Qualification

Sound better than good? Perfect. Want to learn it? Frothing at the mouth yet? Yes/no. Cool.

Don’t be So Afraid to Compliment Others


Several times over the years, both on this site and in our newsletter, I’ve discussed compliments: both how to compliment, as well as when to do it, what compliments work best, and even a few nonverbal tricks to make your compliments more convincing.

Despite that, I notice most guys still don’t compliment much, and I suspect this is largely due to a few common fears around complimenting:

  • “What if my compliment draws attention to my own undesirable traits?”
  • “What if it sounds like I’m just trying to ingratiate myself?”
  • “What if I inflate her ego too much?”

I’m not going to tell you those fears are preposterous, because those things do happen.

However, I will tell you those fears are most likely overblown.

And I’m also going to tell you that if you even have these fears at all, you have little to worry about when it comes to paying compliments.

afraid to compliment

Let’s tackle some of these concerns though, and address what’s behind them.

How to Figure Out Your Standards for Hookups and Flings


Today I will just discuss something that I have been thinking about a lot lately – namely, your hookup standards. By standards I am referring to the different elements or traits in a woman that you enjoy, making you willing to pursue her.

hookup standards

Standards are very personal, meaning that there is a subjective element to them. Remember that at the end of the day, you decide which women you want to put effort into.

This post will just be a reflection over standards and not make any claims about what is right or wrong, but rather what choices will give you the most success in the long run. It is the practical element that I am about to discuss.

The perspective of this post is to discuss how one can either:

Anyway, let us get on with it.

How to Get Laid When You’re Really Busy


This year I’ve been busy; really busy. I perform standup seven nights a week, I’m in law school, and I’m a powerlifter. This shortage of spare time has meant I’ve had to change how I approach getting new women in my life.

get laid busy

I’m sure being busy is something that many of you can relate to. That’s why I’ve written this post, which will tell you the best ways to integrate meeting beautiful women into your busy schedule.

Tactics Tuesday: Pace Her Reality (& Guide Her Emotions)


You’re with a group of three girls you’ve just met at a nightclub, and you’ve really hit it off with one of the girls, this girl Ava. She’s cute, perky, and a whole lot of fun.

pace her reality

Suddenly, you’re yanked out of an engrossed conversation with Ava by a fracas nearby; one of the other girls in the group, Miria, is shouting at one of the nightclub’s bouncers.

First the other friend jumps in.

Then your girl, Ava, jumps in too.

You hang on the sidelines, unsure what to do.

You could feel it’d been going pretty well with Ava, and you thought you stood a pretty solid chance to pull her home tonight.

The argument between the girls and the bouncer end, with the bouncer telling Ava and the other friend that they need to keep Miria on a leash or he’s going to boot them out.

Ava and the two girls debate among each other, emotionally fraught. Finally, Ava turns back to you and says, “Sorry, I think we’re just going to leave.”

“It’s okay, I understand,” you say calmly. You aren’t sure exactly how to react, but you decide to play it cool and do your best to look unfazed. “Let’s trade cells so we can connect later on.”

“I’m really not in trading-numbers mood right now,” she says, “Sorry. I just want to go home.”

Then, she turns away, and her and her two friends take off.

Them’s the shakes, right?

Could it have gone any differently?

It could have – had you paced her reality, instead of freezing in the headlights.

What Should You Focus on to Get Good With Women Fast?


I hear too much garbage in the pickup community from guys who do not know what they are talking about in regards to game; too many beginners with good marketing skills, charlatans who want your money, or guys with good skill but who do not understand what it is they are doing that is actually helping them out and pointing at some obscure technique they think is the one true key to success. Well this is the no bars guide to what will get you good with women in the shortest period of time.

good with women

What I am going to review here is once and for all what will and will not help you. And once we know what is helpful diving into each point, you may better harness your learning curve and make massive gains in regards to your abilities with women.

I have found each of these present in everyone with massive success with women, and if you take them seriously you too can have the same skills as even the most wildly talented seducers.

Are you interested? Are you on the edge of your seat? I hope so. Now, what should you focus on and what will waste your time?

Sexual Dry Spells, Negative Momentum, and the Big Picture


Hi there. I hope everyone is doing well. Today we are focusing more on some theoretical stuff and less on beginner material.

This post is fit for everyone practicing cold approach pick up (the most exciting form of pick up, in my opinion).

dry spell

I have in the past already discussed social momentum quite a few times already. Today we will also discuss momentum, but look at it from a different perspective: from a macro perspective.

Social momentum (micro) - discussed previously - covered how you felt; your emotional state when out meeting women. Positive social momentum could help one get laid, as he will not only feel more like interacting with strangers, but also be more comfortable doing so. When you have (micro) social momentum, you feel like an unbeatable god, as you:

  • Approach more women, feeling on fire

  • Have bigger balls and are bold in your approach, as you don't really care all that much about rejections

  • You will in many cases be more high energy and hook more girls (as you will come across as more exciting) - the pitfall here is that you will have to tone it down when getting into "seduction mode" (unless you want to end up being perceived as a dancing monkey)

  • You will feel more confident

If you have been out in the field a few times, you have probably already reached this type of momentum. I will not cover "how you get there" in this post, as I have covered this aspect already a few times. If you need advice on how to reach social momentum, then check out these post:

Tactics Tuesdays: How to Pick Up Younger Women (18-22)


younger women 18-22Yesterday I responded to a post on our forum about succeeding with girls in the 19- to 23-years-old range from a guy in his mid-30s who noted he does fine with women over 23 but struggles to get anywhere with younger gals. I wanted to flesh this one out a bit more and make it a proper post.

If you’ve been following the site for a while, you probably remember I tackled younger women in this post, about three years ago (has it been that long? Wow...):

Attracting and Dating Younger Women

However, that was a more involved post, with a lot of research, psychology, explanation, and discussion of not only the initial seduction but the ongoing relationship too.

This post will be a more tactical one, and one specifically aimed at how to pick up younger women, particularly in the late teens / early 20s age range that’s so easy for some guys... and so problematic for others.

How I Went from Fat Guy to Lady Killer, Part II


This is Part II of my introductory series on how I went from being a lonely fat guy to a guy who now enjoys all the success with women he wants. If you have not read the first article yet, I urge you to read that one, then come back here.

There were highs and there were definitely even more lows during my journey to mastering the skill to attract women into my life. It would be impossible to count how many times I got shot down. No matter what results I was getting, I believed deep inside that this was a skill I could learn. You have to believe the same of yourself.

There are studies on people that either have a growth or a limiting mindset. If you do not believe in your own ability to grow and change yourself, then you will miss out on lessons and opportunities to do so.

fat guy

One thing I did right with learning how to pick up women was that I took everything one step at a time. I must have spent nearly a year just learning how to approach women and start a conversation while managing my fears.

From there I was constantly working on building attraction with my body language and conversation. I worked on that for another couple of years. Every part of interacting with and attracting women I learned one piece at a time. It is very easy to get overwhelmed with this stuff.

On this site alone you have all the resources you need to learn everything from approaching girls cold, to making meaningful relationships. However, depending on where you are at specifically, it doesn’t help to skip ahead.

When Talking to Girls, Make the Boring Exciting


There was a quite wonderful article in the New York Times the other day about the use of storytelling and narratives.

In the piece, “What Happens When Baseball-Stats Nerds Run a Pro Team?”, the authors reveal their discovery that simply conveying bare factual information ultimately proved less inspiring – despite its accuracy – and that when they began to spin a narrative around the reasons for their actions, players took this more to heart, put their emotions into the game, and started winning.

There’s a great parallel here with talking to girls, too: because if all you’re doing is conveying facts, you’ll struggle to get buy-in, pleasure, excitement, and attention... even if your facts are the best facts in the business.

As you know all too well if you read this site regularly, emotions are a woman’s bread and butter: she doesn’t want to know your details.

She wants to feel something. Facts don’t do this for her. Stories do.

talking to girls

If you can make her feel those up and down emotions, that thrill, and that excitement, she is as good as yours.

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