Female Mind

A look into the way women see love, life, lust, and relationships.

She’ll Do What She Has to to Get What She Wants

get what she wants
Girls: pretty darn good at getting what they want from men.

Apologies if this is a little rough-written. I haven’t slept in 36 hours (save a pair of 30-minute cat naps) and just spent 24 of those hours in a hospital emergency ward (not for myself; the injured party’s going to be fine we think). There’s a story there, though not sure if I want to share it. Suffice it to say 24 hours in an emergency ward surrounded by people in dire conditions with loved ones wailing over terrible tragedies is not something you want to experience if you have the chance to avoid it.

If you’re waiting to hear back from me via email, please be patient; I’m back over at the hospital again tonight, and if I’m not too tired after 60 hours of no-sleep I will get back to you within the next day. Anyway, we’ve got a website to run here, and the show must go on, so... on with the article.

I’ve had a few articles on female psychology I’ve been meaning to get up. This is one of them.

One of the strangest things you will notice when men talk about women is that men fall into roughly four different camps on how they think of the opposite sex:

  1. The white knight camp: “Women are all saints and angels and must be protected from horrible men!”

  2. The doesn’t care camp: “I don’t really know what women’s deal is, but so long as I’ve got one to cook me dinner and give me a blow job I don’t worry about it.”

  3. The bitter guy camp: “Women are all evil, scheming, manipulative succubae whose sole purpose in life is to cause men misery!”

  4. The ladies man camp: “Women are cute, silly beings who can be fickle and changeable, but they’re a whole heck of a lot of fun.”

The first guy is living in La-La Land, of course. He’s the white knight who dreams of trading his valor and loyalty in for an often ill-defined sexual payday. And the second guy just doesn’t know, and doesn’t care to spend the brain cells trying to know.

But what can we say about the third and fourth guys? Guy #3 looks at Guy #4 and mistakes him for Guy #1. Or he thinks he must have it good with women and has never seen their true nature. Guy #4 looks at Guy #3 and says there’s a guy who just doesn’t know how to push the right buttons with girls.

But is one of these guys wrong? Both men are drawing from often extensive experience reinforcing their views. Guy #4 gets laid plenty, has wonderful girlfriends who devote themselves to him, and overall has a great time with girls. Guy #3 gets ignored by women, taken advantage of by them, and screwed over in his relationships.

So what gives? Is Guy #3 just a crummier judge of character than Guy #4 is? He’s choosing the wrong women? Or maybe he’s just worse at meeting girls and running relationships?

While those things are generally true (i.e., guys with negative thoughts about women tend to harbor these thoughts because they aren’t good at getting what they want with girls), there’s more to the puzzle.

The ‘more’ in question is this: a girl’s going to do what she has to do to get what she wants from you. The difference between Guy #3 and Guy #4 is that Guy #4 makes sure women do things he wants to get what they want from him. Guy #3 has no such standard.

4 Manly Rules that Make “Bad News” Girls Avoid You Like Smallpox

bad news girls
The wrong woman can be legitimate bad news for your life. To screen these bad news girls out though (and screen the good ones in), you need 4 rules.

Over the years, I’ve penned various cautionary notes aimed at keeping you safe from girls who will slowly (or quickly!) suck the lifeblood out of you. Some of them include:

Drexel contributed his important warning on a certain class of ‘bad news’ girl here:

Yet, as Sadeqh points out in my article on resilience, I haven’t actually given you a system you can follow for keeping these girls at-bay (or under control):

hey chase! I have noticed that you covered a lot of topics on how to seduce or introduced a lot of ways to success. I admire them all but why didn’t you ever start to teach men how to not let someone (like which would Be called a bitch by society) begin to destroy and suck Blood outta men who only think they love her? why didn’t you write in your book about defense, nothing Held back! about the destroying Powers women could have over men? about the hate that hurt people could use against someone who only wants to enjoy with them? thanks, sadeqh

So, okay; let me give you that then. Defensive tactics to ward off girls who are bad news.

In this essay, I’m going to give you four (4) manly rules I use myself that make girls who are ‘bad news’ avoid me like I’ve got a case of flesh-eating disease... And turn ‘good’ girls (i.e., any girl who won’t shred you or trample you in a hookup or relationship) even better.

How to Use Liminal Space to Advance Your Dates with Girls

liminal space
When a girl’s in liminal space with you, the outside world no longer matters... And she’s free to do what she wants. The catch is, you’ve got to keep her there.

In my previous article on building bubbles, I shared some tips as to how we as seducers can pace girls out of their day-to-day lives and into our reality.

But this may raise a few questions, like what exactly is this reality anyway?

And once she is a part of it, how do we make sure she doesn’t slip out of it?

This article aims to answer those questions for you, so you can make sure the girls you suck in stay sucked in... And adore it.

When She Picks You, It’s Vital She Feels It’s Her Choice

In my article on how to take girls off their “scripts” (i.e., having them abandon whatever they’re doing or trying to do, and have them come be with you on your terms instead), a reader commented on a point of confusion:

Moreover, you’ve even written an entire article on “disqualifying yourself as a boyfriend”. But in this [article on taking girls off their scripts], you suggest that its best to make clear what you actually want (even if that is to be her boyfriend).

I understand his confusion. I should stress before we proceed that a big part of my approach with girls is to be inscrutable: I throw off conflicting signals so a girl can’t nail me down. Just when she thinks I’m a hookup-only guy, I ooze a little romance and her brain starts going crazy. “I thought this guy just wanted to hook up,” she thinks, “and yet he’s so romantic! Maybe it could be something more? What’s going on?! I can’t figure him out!”

This is the same type of mixed signaling you see characters like Simon in The Saint and Juan Antonio in Vicky Cristina Barcelona use (and that’s where I got it from, guys like this):

James Bond uses it a lot in his films. Christian Grey uses it. Every Byronic hero does, more or less. She thinks she knows what this guy is about... And then she doesn’t know what this guy is about. He’s so confusing. What is he about?

At some point, you have to let her figure out what it is you want though, and that’s the kind of ‘clarity’ I meant in the scripts article. She has to be reasonably certain that, “Okay, I think this guy wants to hook up with me,” or, “I think he wants to really date me.” The reason you want her to figure this out is because you want her to start imagining it. If before she was only in single-and-carefree mode, and you want her to be your girlfriend, she needs to think about becoming your girlfriend first.

This article is going to be about that. Or at least, some of that. Therefore, this one won’t be ideal for beginners... Since we’ll be talking about running, essentially, two kinds of game at the same time:

  1. One part sexy, bad boy hook up guy
  2. But also one part mysterious, inscrutable, romantic guy

You do not tell her you want her as more than a fling, or even imply it with words. You want her to read between the lines with you. You usually won’t tell her you want to hook up with her, either (unless you’re Hector. Or Romanian).

This clarity is all implied... Which means it’s never completely clear.

And the reason you never make it completely clear?

You want her to choose you, and feel the choice is her choice.

Tactics Tuesdays: How to Screen Out Gold Diggers

gold digger
Gold diggers can be a problem, especially if you’re richer than the girls you’re meeting. However, there are two (2) ways to reliably screen them out.

In my discussion of the belief some guys hold that “women are evil”, a reader named SBM asks:

The question is though, how do you screen for gold-diggers? How can you find out whether or not a girl you’re taking out on a date is in fact a gold-digger?

It’s a good question!

I, for one, love girls who are sexy, fashionable, and confident. These are tempting qualities for me in any girl. However, one of the drawbacks of qualities like this is that they’re often – perhaps even most often – found in gold diggers.

And while I’m not wealthy enough to attract top-flight gold diggers looking for a payout all of the time, I dress well enough that I get approached by them sometimes in the U.S. (particularly in Las Vegas, that seedy den of predatory gold digging paradise). And I run into them in Eastern Europe and Asia.

Some guys like gold diggers, or are comfortable with the exchange gold diggers want. If you’re such a guy, who thinks it’s perfectly reasonable for a girl to trade her looks for your resources and financial security, this article won’t be of much interest to you. Or maybe it will be, as a kind of reverse technique. Just do the opposite of it and you’ll attract the gold diggers and repel the girls who don’t believe in this trade.

However, if you’re like me, and you dislike the foundation gold digging rests upon, then read on, and let’s talk how to screen these girls out.

When a Girl is Thirsty for You, Here’s How to Skip Ahead with Her

girl is thirsty
When she’s thirsty for you, there’s just one way to mess up: not giving her what she wants. Yet guys make this error far too often. Why?

One of the habits I most disdain in my behavior is acting surprised when a very hot girl shows sudden and intense interest in me.

Some part of me still thinks, “Woah, she can’t like me this much already!”

But she very well can. And even if you’re new, there will be girls who like you immensely.

You’d be surprised how many of my lost lovers never got with me simply because I didn’t just recognize their interest and say “Yes.”

And the problem with not recognizing these signs of intense interest is that women will either think you’re an asshole for not reciprocating, dumb for not noticing, or insecure for not being certain.

When a woman shows an extreme sign of affection, it’s the female equivalent of a direct approach.

And it’s the closest she’ll ever get to telling you she wants to feel your cock inside of her.

What does this behavior look like?

Maybe after she sees you flirt with another girl, she literally approaches you, grabs you, talks over the other girl, and vies for your attention.

Perhaps after you say hello to her, she immediately compliments you.

You could say something that grabs her attention completely (one time, I told a girl she reminded me of Blair Waldorf from the show Gossip Girl, and she went from 0 to 100 instantly).

Or she could say something that, to you, makes her seem way thirstier than you originally thought she was.

And these are actually signs indicating you can skip steps in the seduction, whether they be banter, deep diving – or really just talking in general.

And yet, being the silly gooses we sometimes are as men, we misread her signals, and instead of taking a step forward, we stand still or go backwards.

To prevent you from making the same mistakes I have, here are the ways you should NOT react to a girl who really likes you.

Is It Ever Okay to Date a Feminist?

date a feminist
Feminism has fast become a dominant ideology. When so many of the girls you meet have feminist leanings, should you ever actually date a feminist?

One of the more unusual phenomena we see in the West right now is that in many cases, men and women operate under divergent belief systems.

It’s quite odd, when you think about it. Most places, at most points in history, men and women operate under the same belief system, and agree on the same tenets. Usually that belief system is a religion, like Christianity, Judaism, Islam, Buddhism, Hinduism, or Shinto.

But in the absence of religion, other causes come to fill this space by inspiring a new form of religious belief or fervor. Any time something has an -ism attached to its name, it stands a reasonable chance of coming to occupy religious-level importance to people.

One such example is feminism.

Feminism has reached a degree in the West where non-believers are immediately ‘othered’ by the more hardcore adherents of the philosophy. It has its own truths, like the wage-gap and ‘rape culture’, that are immune to facts and statistics and have moved beyond scientific falsifiability. And it engenders a particularly combative relationship between the sexes.

The purpose of this site is not to either support or combat feminism; feminism comes and goes through history, and is a perpetual feature of advanced, wealthy, safe societies. The purpose of this site is to give you useful tools to make better life decisions.

And the one we’ll talk about today is this: should you ever date a girl who subscribes to feminism... or any other -ism diametrically opposed to your own beliefs?

How to Take Girls Off Their “Scripts”

girl off dating script
If a girl wants to hook up, and you do, that’s easy (well, easier). But what if she doesn’t want to hook up – how do you get her then?

I’m a fan of taking girls “off script.” It makes the courtship more personal and more rewarding for me.

If you want to know what this means, here’s all I mean by a script: every girl has a certain thing she’s on the lookout for at any given time.

For instance, her script may be:

  • I want to find a boyfriend
  • I want to find a husband
  • I want to find a guy to hook up with
  • I just want to make a new guy friend
  • I don’t want to meet anybody right now

Most of the time on Girls Chase, the other writers and I suggest you look for girls who are on the lookout for what you’re looking for. So if you want to hook up, you look for girls who are down for that. If you want a new girlfriend, you’ll have an easier time of it with a girl who’s gunning hard for a boyfriend, much of the time.

This makes life easier, and it’s a surer path to you and the girl you want together in bed or in a relationship.

However, it’s also possible to take a girl off her script and provide her with a different kind of experience. If you don’t enjoy the process of seduction and you just want a girl who wants what you want as fast as possible with as little work as possible, this article won’t be of interest to you (and you’ll want to focus on looking for girls who are looking for you).

If you’re a beginner, I recommend you get good at teasing out signs of interest and approach invitations from girls, and not worry about trying to get girls who aren’t that interested in you until you’ve got more experience (and lays and girlfriends) under your belt.

Yet if the idea of taking a girl who wants a boyfriend and hooking up with her fast, or taking a girl who just wants to hook up or doesn’t want to meet anybody and pulling her into a passionate new relationship with you intrigues you at all, then read on.

Day Game Tips: Make Her Curious

day game tips
If you just pop up next to a girl during day game, you’ll startle her. To avoid this – and get a smoother open – let her see you first, and make it natural.

Note from Chase: Daniel Adebayo is a Nigerian living in Canada. He’s been a member of the Girls Chase discussion boards for several years now, at a roughly intermediate skill level with girls and learning fast. His first article, on curiosity and day game, kicks off here.

Day game.

For me, those two words have held so much opportunity since high school. The idea that you could just see a girl in broad daylight and then seduce her – that was the pinnacle for me. And when I first embarked on this journey, I absorbed all the information I could find on this topic, took that material, and hit the streets.

Two years and more than a few approaches later, I’d had so many dates with beautiful girls, and even gotten a handful of them into bed. And yet, I was still quite unsatisfied. Something didn’t feel right. I mean, this was great, I was actually having sex – with hot girls too! But it still wasn’t what I had imagined two years earlier.

You see, the main thing was the amount of effort, or more specifically, the number of girls I was approaching was far in excess of the number of girls I actually got anywhere with.

So I went back to the drawing board, got imaginative, and started tweaking things. And after a few months I ended up with something enhanced, new, and better. It transformed my day game. And I’m sure this knowledge will transform your day game as well.

3 Theories on a Girl’s Hotness vs. How Hard She is to Get

hot hard to get
Hot girls are the hardest to get. Or is it average-looking girls who are, paradoxically, the hardest? 3 theories dig in and explain.

Previously we challenged the notion that hot girls are always harder to get, and that the hotter they are the harder it is to date and sleep with them. To do this, we looked at six (6) different variables aside from beauty that have an impact on how difficult it is to pick her up. Those were:

  1. A girl’s personality
  2. Her mood
  3. Her sociocultural background
  4. Her social circle
  5. Where and how you meet her
  6. And her self-awareness of her looks

You can read more about these variables in my previous post. If this is the first time you’re encountering them, you will find they shed a new light on the common misconception that “hotter = harder”.

Today we will delve deeper into what makes a girl more or less difficult to date and bed. This post is all about seduction theory. We’ll have a look at different theories on how looks alone affect a girl’s level of difficulty. Thus, the main focus of this post will be on the “look variable”.

The theories covered in this post might seem contradictive to some. One theory we dissect will be on why hot women are harder to get. Another theory we’ll look at today rests on the claim that average women are harder to pick up than more attractive ones.

My opinion on such theories is that they are all more or less correct and do not contradict each other – they just explain two different phenomenon.