Female Mind

When your girlfriend (or wife) starts bringing up feminist talking points, you need to know how to respond. Here’s how to defuse these and get your relationship back on track.

This is going to be a somewhat in-depth article, with a deep look at the full (i.e., millennia- and civilization-spanning) history of feminism.

The purpose is to give you a broad, complete, and meta-view of what feminism is, how it arises, and what its function is in a civilization, so you can break out of male-female power struggles and get the women in your life to take a sweeping historical view of feminism as part of a natural cycle, rather than a more basic/low level "Fight the patriarchy! Permanent progress for the first time ever!" view.

Before we get to the real history of feminism though, first let's talk about why you'd need to talk a girlfriend or wife out of feminist leanings.

No matter your political beliefs, it is a self-evident fact that there is a certain branch of feminism that is toxic to male-female relations.

Some feminist views are fine, and not all of it is bad. However, there is a very vocal chunk of it that is acidic to happy relationships.

Many guys are ‘too picky’ with girls. They ignore good-looking and great girls. Then end up alone, or stuck with girls who are bad news. You must escape this trap.

Here's a couple of concepts I want to differentiate for newer (and maybe some not-so-newer) guys:

Those of pickiness vs. selectiveness.

If you've read my stuff on screening for both long-term commitment as well as for girls you'll hook up with in one-night stands, you know how much I harp on screening out girls who aren't a fit and/or will cause you problems.

I've cited science that shows men are a lot less discriminating about the women they start relationships with than women are men, and that men look for red flags a lot less.

In other words, men are a lot more likely to stumble into relationship quicksand.

However, there is a flip side to all this discrimination you want to employ as a dater, and that is this: if you are too picky about the wrong things, you can also stunt your growth as a seducer and make it nigh impossible to get enough experience to progress.

This is the double side of being discriminating: you must be discriminating enough, without being too much so.

You must be selective without being overly picky.

Some guys seem to think women are ‘innocent’. The actual fact is women are obsessed with sex. They think, talk, and fantasize about it constantly.

Look closely at the picture on the right. What do you see?

I circled it for you. There just below this girl's hand. See it?

It's a dildo.

For all you guys worried about your penis size, you might want to pay attention to the size of that dildo too. That water bottle is 7". The dildo is at least an inch shorter than it... actually possibly a bit more than an inch shorter.

There is this misconception among sexually less experienced men that women don't actually get horny except in extreme situations.

"Only when she meets just the right guy... and he says just the right things... and takes just the right actions... does a woman get horny..."

Women do upkeep on this misconception themselves, talking about how "men are always horny, OMG" or "all men think about is sex" or "why are men so much hornier than women."

But the truth is, women are total horndogs themselves.

You might not believe it (yet) if you're not that experienced with them.

However, once you get out of the illusory la-la land men are in before they gain experience with women, your eyes will start to open more and more, and you'll realize the vast majority of women -- including the sweetest, cutest, most innocent of gals -- really love themselves some cock.

When she says she wants an open relationship, does she mean it? Well, with women, things often have double meanings.

We had a forum thread recently where a member revealed his girlfriend of four years requested an open relationship.

He wasn't sure about it, figuring it might not go his way. But he said yes to it, and some misadventures followed: his gal started getting boinked by other guys, but then our forum member ended up shagging a few girls, then meeting a girl he started to fall for.

The 4-year-girlfriend, previously feeling liberated over her newfound sexual freedom, changed her tune once her beau fell for a woman of his own, and decided she wanted to close the relationship back up again.

Our hero argued with his woman, drama ensued, and ultimately he broke up with her.

I've seen a lot of relationships switch from closed to open over the years, and it is always a drama-filled process, not for the faint of heart (or those who don't like having their hearts torn up and dashed around a bit).

A lot of guys think they can handle it. Some can... for a while.

This article's about what it means when your girlfriend or wife asks for an open relationship.

We'll talk a little bit about whether you ought to give her that, first, too.

Women don't know your insecurities or care about them. So be free. Let the past go, and go get the girl.

In the dating community, there's always this debate about inner vs. outer game, technique vs. belief.

The truth is, they're symbiotic. Where would the bee be without flowers? It would just buzz around and die.

How do you handle a girl who's a tease? Well, simple… you tease her back (and get her to chase).

How do you handle the girl who's a genuine tease?

If you do nightlife, you'll meet those girls who are hot but also extraordinarily flirtatious teases. They come up to you, act flirtatious, seem interested, then turn cold and walk off.

15 minutes later they're back flirting with you again. Then a little while after they're off being cold again. You see them flirting with another guy. Then they're back flirting with you. Then off flirting with him again.

These girls thrive on the drama of feeling desired and feeling the power of being able to confuse and mesmerize.

They live in the nightlife scene and have figured out that pitting multiple men against each other for their affections even if indirectly is extremely powerful. They understand once a guy is sucked in he'll watch them, and he will see them flirt with another guy.

They know that there's nothing he can do at that point but watch, helpless, as she flits back and forth between him and the other guy (or guys).

Or... perhaps there's something he can?

Today I'll show you how to run a sort of game I call 'tease-tease game' -- which is, basically, way to tease the teases to the point they zeroed in on you.

First though, let's take a look at how guys usually respond to girls who are 'cockteases'.

Women will throw all kinds of tests your way. On dates and in relationships, the tests don't stop. That can grate you… or you can learn to love it.

Whether you're approaching a woman for the first ever time, or you're dealing with her in your long-term relationship, she's going to test you.

These tests never go away. Not permanently.

You can get a woman to a point in a pickup where she is more or less fully on board with you and the tests subside to a light flirtatious murmur... so long as you maintain the vibe, the forward progress, and don't make big mistakes.

You can get a woman to a point in a relationship where she has fallen back in-love with you again after a time not being so, where the adversity in the relationship has quelled, and she's staring at you with dreamy eyes again... for a while.

Tests always return, though.

Sometimes they sneak back in in little ways, dancing around the fringes.

• The girl you're picking up pushes back gently and playfully when you invite her home: "Oh, we're leaving so soon?"

• The girl you've been dating for 6 months who's mostly pretty happy with you puts your feet to a gentle fire: "Where do you want this relationship to go?"

Sometimes the tests come roaring in in earth-shattering ways. She tells you there's no way she'd go with you, or that the relationship is done.

The first time most guys realize this, it feels like a colossal burden.

"The tests never end!"

Yet so much of life is how you frame it. This is true with tests as it is with anything.

Tests can be an endless burden, yes. Or they can be a thing you appreciate, or even love.