Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

Build Intrigue and Investment with Conversational Pauses

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

pause to build intrigue
Talking a lot isn’t what gets a girl interested in what you’re saying. To get her to hook, throw her some bait… then allow time for her intrigue to build.

Hey, guys! I would like to share a quick little tip that you can start applying today. Very simple, yet so key. Again, like I’ve mentioned so many times, just because a trick is basic or simple doesn’t mean it isn’t crucial or powerful – quite the contrary, in truth.

As a matter of fact, what I am about to discuss today comes under what I would label as “fundamentals” – key to becoming good with women.

It doesn’t matter what type of game you run, or where. This trick is useful, no matter what. Not only useful but even a necessity! Let’s get on with it.

This post is fit for beginners as well as more advanced players who need a recap. I’ll share two cool openers and a “hook” gambit you can use, all easy to pull off. A nice little bonus for you!

I/A Catch-22, Part 2: How to Counter the Double-Bind

Varoon Rajah's picture

By: Varoon Rajah

counter i/a double bind
While it certainly may entrap you, the I/A double-bind can be countered – or even better, using the strategies here, entirely avoided.

Welcome to Part 2 of our series about the investment-attainability double-bind.

In Part 1, we talked about why the double-bind happens:

  • A woman stalls courtship to seek more information through a man’s investment, but this kind of investment reduces a woman’s attraction to him.

  • A woman stalls courtship when a man seems unattainable, which means he seems very attractive but she hopes to rope him into a commitment by making him invest more before sex.

  • Both these elements combined create an unwinnable scenario for either party – by the time a man has invested enough to seem attainable to her, he has also killed his attraction and she no longer wants what she once wanted.

Now let’s dive into strategies to counter the double-bind – and ways not to.

Women Want Your Attention

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

women attention
Everybody likes attention. Yet with women, attention is more than a means to an end – getting your attention is very often the end itself.

Women will tell you they want a lot of things.

But there’s one thing women want from you above and beyond all else: your attention.

They can want this attention to take various forms.

Some women want you to be smitten with them.

Some women want you to chase after them.

Some women want you to feel like you could never have them (yet pine after them regardless).

Some women want you to court them, seduce them, and make love to them.

Some women just want you to think they’re amazing.

But the one thing all women have in common is they want you to notice them, look at them, and pay them attention.

As a man, this is important for you to understand. All the women around you fight for your attention. They do it in different ways. Some tempt you; some shame you; some scold you; some befriend you; some agree with you. All seek to have you notice them, listen to them, and invest your time and energy into them.

You must understand you can control which women receive your attention... and what they must give you in exchange for it.

But just because you can control this, doesn’t mean you will. Many women are far better at extracting attention from men without giving things men value in return for it than men are at getting what they want in return.

Match Your Ejaculation to Her Climax, and Make Her Fall in Love

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

timed ejaculation
Simultaneous orgasm is a major booster to sexual satisfaction and in-love feelings. An easy way to make her feel more in-love: cum in her at the same time she cums.

Know one of the easiest ways to make a woman fall completely in love with you?

Ejaculate in her right as she climaxes.

I had a girlfriend I hadn’t finished inside of for a while. She was paranoid about getting pregnant. Either I’d finish in her mouth or on her belly or (on rare occasions) in a condom inside her... which are always weaker orgasms for me because condoms just aren’t any fun. The sex through all this was still good; however, it was not phenomenal.

Then at one point I yielded to my passions and ejaculated in her as she climaxed (then had to reassure her for a few minutes after “Don’t worry, you’re not going to get pregnant, you’re not ovulating...”). She got super flirty, happy, and horny for me – much more visibly than usual. She came over again that night; more great sex, but she was still afraid of me finishing in her. So after I gave her a few orgasms from vaginal sex I switched her to anal. I had her bring her knees up into the anal sex orgasm position, and very soon she had a thunderous climax and I finished in her in the midst of her cumming.

She was even hornier and flirtier the next time I saw her, with those huge beaming smiles women only give you when they are thinking about really good sex. She told me “I don’t know why I am so horny all of a sudden!”

But I knew. Incidentally, that next time in bed, I did not match my ejaculation to her climax... and her extreme horniness disappeared.

Matching ejaculations to women’s orgasms has been something I’ve done pretty much forever. I’ve had girlfriends remark on it in wonder: “We always finish at the same time!” And when I’ve asked, they’ve claimed it hasn’t happened for them with any other guy.

I never understood why more men don’t do this. It’s the single greatest, easiest, and most fun way to make women obsessed with your cock and head-over-heels in-love with you.

Yet almost no guy (if the women I’ve talked to about it are to be believed) does it. (and yes, it does work with condoms... though of course going bareback always adds a dimension to sex that isn’t otherwise there)

How to Fix Problem Behavior in Long-Term Relationships

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

fix long term relationship
A mature relationship (older than a few years) often requires a more cooperative approach to behavior problem solving than younger relationships do.

On my article on how to erase your jealousy, a reader comments:

“Chase,

I’ve noticed that in this article and in others, you appear to be open to breaking up with a girl fairly hastily (at least compared to most people) in favor of a higher mission and/or replacing her if things aren’t going well.

This totally makes sense to me in the context of shorter relationships. But what about longer ones? What if I’ve been dating someone for 5+ years and an undesirable behavior comes up. I feel as though just being ready to end it in favor of a higher purpose would be a bit more difficult and perhaps even unreasonable (i.e. given that I’ve spent so much time on it, it would be worth it to put a little more effort into making it work than just a few short talks, and if those don’t work, an ultimatum). Have you had experience in this situation before? What was it like?”

It’s a good question.

First, I should clarify (in case it isn’t already clear) that I am not from the hardcore “if she does anything you even slightly dislike, NEXT her immediately!” camp. These things aren’t always clear when you communicate them over text on the Internet.

In my case, when there’s a problem in a relationship, I make it very clear to a woman what she needs to change. If I like her and want to continue the relationship, and the bad behavior is not too egregious, I will work with her over time to change the behavior. We’ll talk about that in this article (changing behavior over a bit of time).

If on the other hand the behavior is simply deal breaker behavior, then yes, as soon as I see it, she’ll be headed toward the door. But that sort of behavior always manifests itself in the first few weeks or, at most, month. This assumes you run your early relationships as I suggest, and keep things to just the two of you without involving other people, and are somewhat tough to be with at first (so you get to see her true colors). If you’re accommodating and you let her lead things then yes, you’ll have no idea who she is until six months in or maybe after your first kid. Then you’ve got problems.

Assuming you handle the early relationship well though, and screen well, you will end up in long-term relationships with some pretty amazing women who fit you pretty well.

Yet, sooner or later, people change. She gets stressed out, and her stress causes her to become disrespectful or insulting toward you. Her diet goes to hell and she packs on some extra weight, or she bears you a few children and the weight is slow to come off after the latest kid. She gets extra busy at work and has less and less time for you. Her best friend becomes single again and wants her to go out a lot like they did when they were both single, and she’s begun to go with it.

You’re years into the relationship. You might live together, be married, and/or have children. Regardless, you’re hugely invested in her at this point and have made all sorts of changes and adjustments to your life to accommodate the relationship (i.e., you probably don’t party with your pals as much, travel so much to exotic locales on guys’ vacations, or hang out all weekend at the sports bar anymore, I’m guessing).

Now she’s suddenly not behaving well. But you don’t want to just ditch her and walk. So what do you do?

EXPLICIT CONTENT! How to Sexualize Conversations with Minimal Resistance

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

explicit conversations
Explicit content ahead! No, not really. But such a warning can work as a golden buffer for transitions into juicy sex talk with your girl.

This post doesn’t really contain explicit content, but I made you look. :)

Seeing the headline, you probably:

  • Got a bit curious about the content of this post

  • Considered whether you wanted to expose yourself to explicit content – you could have closed this article if you didn’t

  • Are more likely to accept the explicit content of this post, having been warned

You’ll see where I’m going with this as you read – if you haven’t figured it out already. The reactions discussed above constitute a little trick I’m about to show you.

The purpose of this post is to share a technique that can help you:

Why Are Girls You Meet in Clubs so Flakey?

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

club girls flakey
Women you meet in nightclubs can be super flakey. Why do they flake so much later – and what can you do to reduce their ghosting/flaking?

Spend any amount of time in nightlife, and you fast learn a rule: don’t go for phone numbers; go for same-night lays.

I did much of my early approaching in nightclubs, and took plenty of phone numbers from them. Yet time and again, the numbers that panned out were almost all from the minority of approaches I did outside the club – in transit, on the street, via social circle.

Even if I met a girl who liked to party and club on the street or in transit, I was still a lot more likely to get a date with her that way than had I met her in the club.

There were exceptions, of course. I took phone numbers from girls I met in nightclubs and bars and managed to sleep with them sometimes. But it was so infrequent it stood out.

Yet eventually, I fixed it. After enough years in the game, I reached the point where phone numbers from nightclubs are almost as reliable as phone numbers from girls from other places. How to fix the club-flake problem is the subject of this post.

Girls Who Sense Your Intentions and Don't Want You Anymore

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

girl sense your intentions
A woman senses you only want to hook up with her, and closes herself off to you. Why’d it happen – and how do you prevent this ‘closing off’?

On an article from about half a year ago, Art commented:

“Has anyone noticed how women can sense if you don’t foresee a future relationship and put their guard up/ auto-reject? And then the women you DO want to become intimate with can sense a ‘strings-attached’ neediness, causing an imbalance? I’d love to get some insight on balancing attainability when being handsome yet shy. I get all kinds of signs from women that I’m excited to unlock, yet they can tell if it’s “real” or not very quickly and move on if the vibe isn’t real.”

It's a common scenario. A girl who liked you before, who realizes you don't want her for what she wants or might want with you, and auto-rejects.

Odds are you've seen this plenty. You start to talk to a girl, she's into you, but you realize you don't want anything long-term with her. All of a sudden it's as if she read your mind, and she grows frigid. The magic fades, and she makes her exit.

This is frustrating when you're on a notch hunt. You want to get more women in bed, raise your experience level, and have fun... but you don't necessarily want to commit to every girl who finds her way into your bed.

Yet girls keep realizing it, and keep going cold to you. Is there a way to stop this happening?

Gunwitch | Basics of Seduction MMA (Podcast)

Varoon Rajah's picture

By: Varoon Rajah

Welcome back to another episode of Dating Mechanics!

Today I speak with someone who has been highly recommended to me by several author-seducers I know (including Alek Rolstad here on Girls Chase), as he was one of the pioneers of the entire pickup artist universe two decades ago.

Gunwitch has been in the community and a teacher since the days of MASF, The Game, Mystery, and Neil Strauss. His method, dubbed “Gunwitch Method,” is incredibly powerful, centered around the use of body-states to attract and arouse women. Perhaps you know how powerful a certain vibe can be, but by and large, Gunwitch teaches ways for guys to become exactly what they seek, embodying an emotion within themselves that can be so powerful, women feel it and absorb it.

In this episode, we’re going to cover the basics of Gunwitch’s Seduction MMA – how to use sub-communication with sexual arousal, emotional stimulation, and social frames to make girls work for you and chase after you. This podcast is all about using effective mixed systems efficiently, and using mental toughness and frame dominance to influence a girl’s state of mind.

Sounds crazy, right? Well, it’s actually very powerful stuff. It can give you the ability to make girls chase after you simply because they’re infatuated with and enamored by you. I’d say that’s a pretty cool skill for a man to have!

Decision Making in Seduction IV: Mistakes Are Good

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

mistakes are good
Good decisions can get you laid tonight, but mistakes are what provide lessons that make you more successful with women down the road.

Gentlemen,

I hope you enjoyed my posts on decision making and handling wildcards – two very interrelated subjects. Today, I will share some final thoughts. Reading through these posts a second time, I have noticed there is one aspect that may lead to confusion or misunderstanding, and could become detrimental in the long term. I am going to clarify my take on this.

Some situations in field will cause difficulties that require good decisions to be made. The same goes for when you will have to deal with wildcards. You must remain cool-headed and try to find solutions, or simply move on. Decide which of the solutions you would like to stick with.

The latter can become a choice of whether to move on, whether to focus on building more compliance (which, as we discussed, is one of many solutions to lowering the detrimental effects of wildcards), or whether you want to deal with the wildcard. Sometimes the answer is straightforward. Sometimes it isn’t, and different solutions present themselves.

Nevertheless, when discussing these subjects, we have always kept in mind that you must make a decision that either gives you the best chance of getting to bang the girl or avoids wasting time, money, or energy on bad leads.