Seduction

Lovers seduce women; fighters intimidate men. But why do men choose the specializations they do – and which should you choose?

I was probably about 20 years old when I accepted what was to me a weird fact at the time. That fact was that the toughest, manliest, most utterly male, intimidating men usually only dated girls who were just okay. They didn’t get gorgeous girls... not usually. They’d get girls with ordinary faces, ordinary brains, and maybe okay bodies.

I’d seen a similar trend in myself. In midway through high school I’d switched images: from nerd chic to the leather jacket bad boy look. And though I was unquestionably cooler and tougher looking, the fevered pursuit I’d had from popular, pretty girls over the previous four years died down. Men, however, respected me more than ever. I’d gained more male respect, but at the cost of female desire.

Fast forward a few years. I’d internalized the lesson that men who acted über manly had focused their efforts on appealing to male measurements of power and dominance... and cost themselves in women. It was a hard decision at the time, but at last I said “I will no longer live my life for other men.” And as I reinvented myself again, this time with an emphasis on what attracted women, I became more attractive to women once more, with some small cost to the respect other men held for me. I stopped being a fighter, and became a lover.

Ultimately, I’d say it was a good move for me, in many ways. Ultra maleness is not so conducive to being a writer or a business owner. Nor is it so good a fit for a man who wants to travel around and network with other people. Taking my foot off the masculinity gas somewhat freed me to not have to be a caveman in everything I did. And of course, the women... they’re much better for the guys who aren’t male caricatures.

Lovers vs. fighters is something Hector delved into with last week’s “A Feminine Man, Done Right, Can be Wildly Sexy to Women.” In that article, he discussed how a certain degree of femininity in men can trump overdone masculinity when it comes to success with girls.

Today, I want to go into the science and the psychology of it: why men choose the paths they do, and which one is actually the more fruitful path to choose.

Masculinity is good. But a feminine man who is still sexual and dominant offers something uniquely special women just go nuts for.

We focus heavily on becoming masculine here at Girls Chase, because it’s a problem that plagues most men reading this.

You’re probably too feminine.

To define this, allow me to define some feminine behaviors:

• Meek body language: avoiding people’s personal bubbles – if something makes you feel small, it’s feminine body language (e.g., standing with legs close together)

• Words that temper the assertiveness of your assertions (e.g., “It’s just this” or “I was only saying that…”)

• Flamboyant gestures (e.g., rolling your eyes)

• Extravagant clothing (e.g., peacocking)

On that last point, though, strangely, it’s the males of almost every species on earth that “peacock” and display the most colorful coats, feathers, or behaviors to attract women. My argument would be that males are demonstrating their feminine energy to more closely link with women.

This principle, that the feminine attracts the feminine, is the heart of this article.

For a lot of men, though not all, their problem isn’t attracting women. What I’ve noticed, upon reflection, is that I’ve never really had trouble attracting women, even absolute stunners.

What the journey in game, then, seems to be about is:

1. Increasing the frequency and degree of attraction I receive from stunning women (i.e., fundamentals)

2. Learning how to take that attraction and lead it to bed (i.e., game)

Women are, I’d guess, far more attracted to you than you think. I know this because I will go out with guys who are in every sense beginners and immediately spot women who are attracted to them. I tell them to approach, and it goes amazingly well.

The reason they don’t close is because of their game.

Therefore, when I say, for anyone intermediate or below, you’re probably too feminine, I’m saying that you probably attract women you yourself are genuinely attracted to (distinct from doggish horniness), but you lack the male aggression to close the deal. For those who already have that masculine spirit nailed down, we can actually take a journey back into the feminine energy and amplify it to amplify attraction (and also induce chasing).

Feminine behaviors will mostly help with:

1. Tempering your attainability

2. Calming your over-aggression

3. Encouraging women to chase

But before we begin, one note.

With the Mirror Gambit, you hold a mirror up to a woman’s sexual side... and suck her into her sexual self.

Previously, we discussed how pacing can help you crack her shield and build rapport and connection while positioning yourself as an authority figure in her reality – a guy who truly understands what it’s like to be her. The idea with pacing a girl’s reality is that it becomes much easier to lead her in the direction you desire – to bed.

This is what one refers to as pacing and leading. We covered pacing in the previous post, so now you guys may be asking: how about leading? What does “leading” really mean in this context? Leading is basically anything that can lead her from point A (where she is currently) to Z (where you want her), physically or emotionally. In other words, leading can involve isolation, extraction, verbal escalation (sex talk), non-verbal escalation (eye contact, touching), etc.

Basically, once you have paced her, she will be softened up and open for you to take the lead – which is the second step.

Today I want to show you a way to use pacing and leading – with the most focus on pacing, because I find that to be the most interesting aspect here (there are many existing posts on “leading” material, and at the end of the day, physical escalation remains one of the most powerful “leading” tools in seduction).

So, like my previous posts, I will here share a gambit you can use in your seductions or as inspiration to create something of your own. It can, like always, help you see how you can construct some juicy material. As usual, this gambit will be filled with other goodies that will have an impact on the receiver – and of course we will break it all down.

This routine/gambit comes up in my Night Game podcast with Varoon Rajah when I share one of my adventures. So check that podcast out if you want to see this exact gambit being used (and how I followed up) and get some ideas of the context in which you can use it.

How do you make a woman feel what you want her to feel? One way is with weasel words – phrases you slip into speech designed to elicit specific emotions.

Hey guys, and welcome back. Previously, I shared a sex-talk routine based on orgasm control. We discussed the underlying mechanism that made it work, the particular aspect of sexual prizing, and how the gambit I presented helped us generate that form of attraction.

Today, we will discuss the different verbal tools that I used to spice up the whole gambit and make it sound more exciting, all while stimulating her emotionally (even further). Many of these techniques will be covered here. This post basically covers all the “spices” of the gambit, whereas the previous post covered the “meat” itself.

Before you read this post, grab yourself a cup of tea or coffee – because you better be awake.

All of the material below is just icing on the cake, really. It is for you who want to take things to the next level. We will cover a bunch of concepts from neuro-semantics and even hypnosis. You have been warned.

Just met her in the bar, and want a fun way to take things sexual fast? Break out the orgasm control routine – and watch her get hot in a hurry.

I’ve decided to write a follow-up to my tantric sex gambit. The idea behind that post was to not only give you a powerful gambit to play around with, but also give myself an opportunity to share the principles behind it, so you can learn from them. In other words, those principles serve as examples of how certain concepts can be used.

In the previous post, we discussed how the tantric sex gambit would:

• Display sexual prizing – by showing your knowledge related to sex and framing you as a good lover

• Introduce the topic of sex in a low-key, not overly-explicit way – tantric sex is hot, but it’s not very explicit. We also discussed how using a proxy could allow us to introduce the topic with more ease (e.g., “I read somewhere that…”)

• Force some touching (and eye contact) – when doing that quick demo, you hold hands and face each other, looking each other in the eyes

• Provide an easy way to get her entranced – by breathing together

• Incorporate other minor stuff, too – rich descriptions, commands, and so on

This time around, we will focus on more explicit material and communicating even more sexual prizing – how to talk about sex and really communicate that you know your shit. So this time, our focus will be:

• Sexual prizing (again)

• Making her horny by being more explicit

• Contrasting – to set us apart from other men and other people, framing ourselves as sexually superior

• How to use fractionation to create anticipation and amplify everything

• Using more amplifying language (e.g., “more and more”)

These things can all seem very difficult to grasp by simply reading about the gambit. There is so much to remember, and if you are not used to using advanced verbals, this can seem overly confusing. However, my experience tells me that once you see it exemplified in light of the explanations, it should make more sense. So we will exemplify things before discussing the concepts used.

Remember, practice makes champions, but the first try may be a bit off (I highly doubt you will experience any major side-effects from doing this wrong). With practice, you should improve your flow and experience these awesome techniques at full power.

But again, I will not lie, this post is made for intermediate to advanced players. Feel free to read it if you are a beginner, but do not expect to get too far with this stuff right away unless you have your fundamentals in check (at least) and preferably have some experience with women. Either way, let us get on with this technique.

Women contradict themselves a lot. But they don’t always do so for the same reasons... They have 5 different ones, in fact.

She tells you she’s past her hookup phase and doesn’t just hook up with guys anymore. An hour later she’s fumbling with your belt buckle to pull down your pants and give you a blow job.

She tells you she’s done dating bad boys. But after your best bad boy performance, she’s already texting you a few days later to see when you want to do it again.

She tells you at the ordering window she doesn’t want anything to drink. Five minutes later she’s gulped down most of your cola and left you with an almost-empty cup.

She texts you she doesn’t want to be around a guy with friends like yours. Then she shows up at your door that night anyway, a big grin on her face... even after you told her you’re not dropping your friends for her.

She tells you she doesn’t want anything serious with you. A few months later she picks a big blow-up fight because she feels like it isn’t going anywhere.

She tells you she hates people who contradict themselves all the time. Then she contradicts herself again.

Spend any time around women and you’ve no doubt seen this. Most of these contradictions you get used to once you’ve seen them enough. But even if you’re a grizzled romantic veteran, women will still pull out contradictions that make your mental gears grind to a halt. And the only thing you can do is stare, jaw agape, and ask yourself, “What on Earth...? How can both of these sentiments come from the same person?”

Today we’re going to explore this feminine conundrum. We’re going to resolve all the contradictions around the female tendency to contradict.

Women love tantra. The feelings, emotions, and spirituality of it. By talking about tantra with girls, you can seduce them then and there.

Hey, guys. I know I promised a report this time around, but I just had to share this technique with you.

Today I will share a simple technique that I find very powerful. Now, it is somewhat of an old-school way of performing pick-up and seduction – focusing on routines – but I don’t see that as a bad thing, necessarily. First of all, I am old school. Secondly, I believe that we are all more or less relying on certain routines whether or not we want to admit it. Yes, even though you may not follow a script (a bit overkill, maybe?), there are still certain techniques or lines you may find yourself using a lot (with great success) when interacting with women.

Thirdly, I also believe routines can be key for practicing seducers – like a cheat code, in a way. I do not have a script per se, but I do like to have some cheat codes available in case I get stuck in a situation and need something juicy and powerful to push things forward.

And lastly, routines like this one can show you – as an example – how things can be done in a new, powerful way. What comes is highly recommended to help you understand the underlying mechanism of the routine, the factors that make it work, and the different techniques and concepts used (the overall mechanisms) that make the routine so powerful. The idea here is that you can deconstruct it and use the concepts and techniques individually, or you can use the knowledge to make up powerful stuff on your own. I will, of course, help you deconstruct it all in this post.

Before reading on, be aware that this post is better suited for intermediate to advanced players!