Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

When Women "Don't Count" Guys They've Slept with Before

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

guy didn't count
Some guys just don’t ‘count’ for women. They can hook up with them, date them… and yet, the guys still don’t count. Why do women do this, and how can you be a ‘doesn’t count’ guy yourself?

There was a thing I set out to do early on in my journey into seduction. I couldn’t then have put it into words. But I knew what it looked like. I wished:

  • To be a guy women pined for, instead of the one doing the pining

  • To be able to walk into a room and seduce the woman I wanted

  • Women to expect nothing from me yet desire me just the same

  • Women to be genuinely surprised if I chose to keep them as girlfriends

  • To be a man the normal rules of dating did not apply to

There are different ways to name this. One might be to say I wanted all the power in the male-female courtship dynamic. The power to choose, seduce, and decide. And sure, you could say that was true. But that’s true of most people. Most people – men and women alike – look for ways to increase their power in the courtship dance. They want to be more liked, more loved, more adored; to better be able to pick and choose the mates they want, and captures those mates’ hearts and minds.

Another way to name what I wanted, though, was to be a guy who ‘didn’t count’.

The phrase ‘doesn’t count’ can apply to lots of things. However, the way women usually use it when talking about men they’ve had romantic involvements with is to describe men they want to erase from their histories: “He didn’t count.” “That guy didn’t count.” “Oh, Jim? He doesn’t count.”

That was the guy I wanted to be.

The one who ‘didn’t count’.

How to Hook Girls In, Pt.3: Building Intrigue

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

building intrigue
So far, we’ve tackled effective pre-opener tactics. Now it’s time to build intrigue to set the hook and reel her in.

Welcome back. So, last week we discussed opening, and in particular, pre-opening.

But what do you do once you open? You transition into material that hooks girls in. The things you have to focus on during the initial phase of the interaction are:

The first one is something you should always do throughout and after the interaction. The second aspect is the key here. There are many ways to hook a girl in a stimulating way. For example:

I use teasing sometimes, although I’m not an expert. I tend to fall into the trap of miscalibrating them and coming off as rude, ruining my sets.

Occasionally, some witty comments come out of my mouth, but it usually happens when I feel on fire – or in state, rather – which we label as high micro (social) momentum.

I will not discuss funny lines or teasing here because I will never write about anything that I am not a full-blown expert in. When it comes to “games”, they usually follow different structures. Using games is kind of out of trend these days.

Many guys prefer being more natural, and even for us technical guys, we like to make things “naturalized” rather than stick to canned games. Using canned games is so 2005 anyway! That said, they do work. They usually hook girls in and can stimulate them enough to buy some time.

Sadly, each game follows a different structure. I could write a post where I compile a bunch of games, but I think these will have been posted elsewhere on the web a century ago. Some examples that come to mind are The Cube, Strawberry Field, and question games. One I personally really like is called "Fuck, Marry, or Kill.”

How to Turn Girls You've Slept with into Friends

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

girlfriends into friends
How do you turn a girl you’ve slept with into a friend? There are a few rules to follow – but also some pitfalls you must avoid.

Just dug an old topic out of my ‘topic ideas’ grab bag. A member of the Girls Chase forums, some years back, asked another member:

“You mentioned keeping these girls around as friends. Would you recommend this for women I’ve already slept with and hung out with for a bit? If so, how would you make that transition?”

... and that member responded:

“This is beyond my level. Maybe chase can shine some light on this topic. How to turn girls you’ve slept with into friends. Article worthy?”

I went into details in my response on that thread, but I’d like to explore the topic more today. How do you turn a girl you’ve slept with into a friend?

I’ve done it several times (I’ll explain why not more than that below), and it is eminently doable. However, there are some nuances involved in it you will have to keep in mind... to not have it blow up in your face, one way or another.

Tactics Tuesdays: 5 Ways to 'Assume the Sale' with Girls

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

assume the sale dating
You know she likes you, but want to avoid resistance when you ask her to do something? Don’t give her the chance to resist. Assume the sale instead.

"Assume the sale."

It's one of the most recognizable sales mantras. Don't ask the prospect if he wants to buy. Assume he does. Then proceed under that assumption.

This advice has long made the rounds in seduction circles as well.

It's good advice, when timed well and calibrated to the girl and the scenario.

When you 'assume the sale' with an interested woman, you aren't jumping the gun heedlessly, of course. You don't assume "Well, she said 'hello' to me, so now I can take her hand and lead her to the washroom" (what you can do when she says 'hello' to you? Assume attraction). Rather than jump any guns, instead you read a girl's signs of interest and when you can tell she's probably ready for something, you just assume she is... and lead.

That's all well and good. If you don't have any sales training though, how do you do this?

Today's Tactics Tuesdays post arms you with five (5) different ways to assume the sale with women - all you have to do pick the method most suitable for your girl and your situation, and apply.

True Love Doesn’t Exist (Video)

Hector Castillo's picture

By: Hector Castillo

This is my favorite video I’ve put out. It’s so beautifully empowering and inspirational if you can make it through. The journey of seduction and learning about women is, at its core, a journey of understanding what you can and cannot get from women. When you learn that romantic love, the everlasting kind that is perpetuated by not only our media and culture, but by our intrinsic desire to find lasting pleasure and lasting peace, is not real, your world will change.

Some might argue that romantic love is a new idea, and in some ways this is correct; most cultures up until a few hundred years ago saw sex and marriage as a transaction that kept resources flowing and bloodlines intact, but the game we play in public is very different from the game we play in our hearts and in our heads.
 
We have ALWAYS sought true love.

We are driven to find permanence, and the biggest trick we ever played on ourselves was convincing ourselves that we could find it in a romantic partner.

Not only is this a lie, it will SEVERELY hinder your romantic capabilities, both in casual and long-term relationships. You will be perpetually disappointed that a seduction or a relationship did not remain filled with bubbles and joy.

Watch the video and find out why true love is an illusion and why you should let it go.

Boost Your Success with Women by Using the Traffic Light System

Varoon Rajah's picture

By: Varoon Rajah

traffic light system
Time and energy can be wasted on non-receptive girls, or by over-gaming receptive ones. Economize your dating by distinguishing between Reds, Yellows, and Greens.

With so many women to choose from in the world and so many women to approach, how the heck does a guy manage to filter through them faster and more efficiently, and become more effective in the mating game?

A lot of guys starting out spend a lot of time cold approaching in day game and night game, trying to learn their ladders for how to get women and identify the receptive ones from the girls who just aren’t interested.

Unfortunately, what also happens when learning is that a guy gets discouraged by rejection because he takes the response of a single woman far too personally.

Especially for newbies and virgins, a single rejection can be devastating, especially if it’s a type of girl he strongly aspires to get.

However, it’s not wise to take the opinion of one woman – or even a few women – seriously. This is because there are three categories of women out there in the world:

  • Women for whom you are exactly their type
  • Women for whom you might be their type, but they’re not sure
  • Women for whom you are absolutely not their type

Being a woman’s type or not is fairly binary – after all, attraction is binary – but women also have preconceived notions about men based on their appearance, fundamentals, and behavior.

In short, women have preferences, but you can also short circuit their preferences by creating desire.

How to Hook Girls In, Pt.2: Speaker-Centered Pre-Openers

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

speaker-centered pre-openers
Less pressure on her, more leeway for you. This simple technique lowers her defenses and sets you apart from all the ‘other’ guys.

Hey, guys, and welcome back. So, previously I shared a quick recap of the keys to hooking a girl – or a group – into a conversation.

The first minutes of an interaction with a stranger – e.g., in cold approach – can be the hardest, as she has no clue who you are and doesn’t really need a reason to tell you to get lost. In other words, you have little room for mistakes. You need to do things right. That is what this series is all about.

Hooking is all about getting a girl to willingly interact with you after you open. You can open a girl, but if she is not willing to keep up a conversation with you, an opening isn’t worth much.

The paradox when it comes to opening and hooking is that it is the phase where you have the least room for mistakes, yet also the part where you are the most nervous and prone to make mistakes.

Therefore, my goal here is two-fold:

  • To give you tips, tricks, and tools for opening and hooking smoothly – knowing “how” will make you more relaxed and less anxious during the initial phases

  • To make the process easier, requiring as little mental energy as possible

Many individuals fear approaching new people or environments. It is a bit scary, I won’t lie. Even the best seducers out there have those fears, to a degree. Therefore, there’s nothing wrong with finding an almost risk-free way of approaching so you can relax a bit more and make the process easier for yourself, mentally and emotionally. That’s what we will cover now.

In my opinion, the way to make an opening smooth and efficient is to use a pre-opener beforehand. It’s not cheating, nor is it always a strategy for pussies. In fact, it’s a smart, fun, and most importantly, efficient way of opening.

A Man's Girl Mix and His Jadedness

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

girl mix
The mix of girls you’ve dated and slept with informs your opinions of women. Different girl mixes can lead to very different thoughts about women.

As you make your way through life, and particularly as you make your way through seduction, you will discover different men at varying levels of ‘jaded’.

There are romantically inexperienced men who are incredibly optimistically naïve about women. There are romantically inexperienced men who are incredibly pessimistically naïve about women. Like all views formed from a distance, these are unrealistic views, punctured by the first few experiences with women in the flesh.

Once a man begins to accumulate romantic experience, his views on women shift toward the middle. The optimist discovers women are not as pure as he’d thought; the pessimist discovers women are not so devious as he’d feared.

Yet, from this intermediate middle point, as men accumulate still more sexual and romantic experience, their views diverge again.

All experienced men’s views on women are ‘realistic’. Yet the tenor of the views can differ wildly from man to man. They range from the experienced man who thinks women are sometimes tricky but mostly sweet, to the experienced man who thinks every woman is a siren, luring men who fall off their guards for even a moment to the rocks.

There’s one single, easy way to predict how jaded about women a man with some experience under his belt will be, though: look at the mix of women he’s been with.

Tactics Tuesdays: Quick Yes-Ladders to Smash Resistance

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

yes-ladderOne of the biggest obstacles with women is resistance.

If a girl gives you no resistance, you can do whatever you want with her, right?

“Come with me,” and she goes with you. Great. “Spin around, show me your dress,” and she spins. “Let’s head somewhere a little more private,” and she heads there with you. “Take your shirt off,” and she does. Perfect.

Yet the courtship dance is built on resist-persist. She resists, you persist. She resists, you persist. This ‘persistence testing’ women do is a way for them to vet your confidence and romantic aptitude. And confidence and romantic aptitude are signals to a woman of your mate quality. The more confident you are, and the more you know how to handle whatever she throws your way, the higher caliber a mate she judges you to be.

For this reason, handling resistance is one of the big things you must be able to do to get the women you want.

Today we’ll look at one quick, simple resistance-buster that lets you carve through moderate resistance from otherwise interested women: the quick 2-to-4-step flirtatious yes-ladder.

For Faster Sex, Avoid the Boyfriend Zone

Hector Castillo's picture

By: Hector Castillo

boyfriend-zone-paths
Sex won’t happen as quickly if she sees you as a potential boyfriend. Avoid boyfriend qualities and behaviors, and she won’t feel the need to wait for sex.

Girls generally want three types of men in their lives.

Lovers. Men they see as potential sex mates who may or may not be available for longer-term flings. They end up falling the most in love with these men because they are men who make it clear from the get-go what they want from her – sex – and she respects that. They have mostly a sexual value but can also have romantic value to her.

Orbiters. These are men women draw into their lives with some light flirting. Women give these men a sense that maybe something might happen if he provides her with emotions and/or social connections (a job, money, etc.), or they make it clear to the guy that he’s only a friend – but he hopes that might change some day. He has little-to-no sexual or romantic value to her.

Boyfriends. These are men women find cute or charming but seem a bit safer than some rascal lover. They can see themselves dating these men or even marrying them. The most elite of men can straddle the line between a lover and boyfriend quite well, which helps with higher-caliber women who don’t hook up with strangers too often. But most men who are boyfriend types are strictly boyfriend types.

At Girls Chase, we advise readers to focus on enhancing their position as a lover, since it’s the best route to go. Going the “I want to be your boyfriend” route takes more time than it takes to be a lover. Why?