Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

Your Best Chance Is on the First Date

Pierre Navarro's picture

By: Pierre Navarro

your best chance is on the first date
Whether you want a serious or casual relationship with a woman, you need to get her in bed before attraction windows close. Pro tip: your best bet is the first date.

Editor's Note: Pierre has been a long-time member on our boards, and this is his first article on Girls Chase. He'll be 50 this year, divorced in 2012 after 15 years of marriage. Now, after several years back in the game, we’re stoked to add his perspective on women and dating to our blog. Here he starts things off with a very educational story! – BT

By August 2015, I had hit the one-year mark in my seduction education. I had a few successes, but there was still much to learn.

In particular, I was missing a key element in my dating mindset, and it took a monumental failure to finally beat it into my skull. Lucky for me and you, failure is a powerful learning tool, and the story I’m about to relate is what taught me the most important dating lesson I’ve learned so far, namely:

Your best chance to make it happen is to push for sex on the first date.

And that goes for whatever you want to “make happen” – whether that’s just having sex with a girl or making her your girlfriend.

For a lot of guys, this mindset can seem counterintuitive, but I promise you it’s not. In this article, I’ll share the epiphanies that finally convinced me just how crucial – and effective – it is.

Storytime!

Secrets to Being Fearless as a Man (Video)

Hector Castillo's picture

By: Hector Castillo

Fear.

What a monstrous topic.

What an enemy.

He may be the ultimate enemy.

How do you deal with him? What makes a man truly fearless?

How to be fearless?

Totally fearless? Well, that's a huge undertaking.

Let's start with discovering the reasons behind fear and then work from that foundation to see what it means to be a fearless man?

As Mating Complexity Increases, Do Reproductive Returns Diminish?

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

mating complexity
Mating gets more complex as our societies become more complex. But as complexity rises, does the law of diminishing (reproductive) returns set in? (image source: Darwin Leo)

Bit of an abstract/sociological article here.

A little more academic than usual, too.

If you'd prefer tactics on dealing with an increasingly complex mating market, see my Game Imbalance Theory series. Otherwise, if you're down for a little academic sociology, let's proceed...

I'm reading through John Tainter's brilliant The Collapse of Complex Societies. Tainter's premise is civilization (or society, as he prefers to call it) is a problem-solving entity. As a society encounters new problems (like a food shortage or a militaristic neighbor) it adds new layers to itself, to address the problem (more intensive farming, or the training of a better military). These new layers make the society more complex.

As the society becomes more complex (to deal with more problems), it requires more resources. For a while it gets these through conquest or opening up new resource channels. Later it must get them by raising taxes on the population and by controlling more and more of its populace's lives. The further along this process it goes, the greater the demands on the society's support population become, and the smaller the returns on its increasing complexity get. It must demand more and more, to support greater and greater complexity, for less and less return.

As I've read Tainter, it's gotten me thinking about romantic relationships. There are some fascinating trends in dating, mating, and reproduction... trends like:

Anecdotally, the Battle of the Sexes seems to have reached fevered pitch, with many jilted women asking "where all the good men have gone" and many jilted men complaining they didn't go anywhere but were overlooked while these women were too busy "riding the cock carousel" (and now no longer want these "post-wall" women). This is something it's harder to quantify, but I've gone through a fair few newspaper advice columns from the 1880s through the 1950s and don't recall coming across anything close to this level of back-and-forthing between the sexes.

Divorce rates have skyrocketed, even as the availability of sex partners seemingly has too (I can't find much data on historical lifetime sex partners, unfortunately, but I find it hard to believe the average number of lifetime sex partners was "seven" in the 18th and 19th Centuries, as it is now -- though here's an interesting article on changing views on sexuality across the times).

As I looked at all this, I had to wonder: is the ever-increasing complexity of modern dating to blame for dating's shabbier and shabbier results overall for men and women alike?

How Frame Control Affects Your Entire Interactions with Girls

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

frame control and interactions with girls
In this follow-up article on frame control, we discuss – from a macro perspective – how the frames you set affect your whole interaction with a girl.

Hey, guys. Welcome back. If you read my previous article on frames (which you should, as frames and frame control are some of the most important concepts in seduction), you understand how pickup, dating, and seduction are not FULLY sequential processes.

Now, they are sequential to some extent – as you do open first, then hook, before eventually isolating, seducing, extracting, and having sex.

But it is clear that:

  • How well you open will have an impact on how easily you hook

  • How well you hook will define how easily you can isolate, build rapport, seduce, and most importantly, SET FRAMES

And here is the MOST KEY ITEM:

  • How well you set the frames will DEFINE EVERYTHING that follows, including how much compliance you will have, what you can and can’t get away with, how easily it will be to extract, how easy or hard it will be to escalate, how much resistance you will face, if any, and so on.

So, frames are important, as you can see. But what is also interesting is how pickup, seduction, and dating is a semi-sequential process. Yes, there are sequences to follow, but each sequence sets the pace, tone, and overall vibe of the upcoming steps. This is exactly what FRAMING does!

But you already know this if you read my previous post. If not, then you better check it out, as most articles on Girls Chase will make more sense after you do.

This post is a continuation. Now, if you know everything about framing, you may skip my previous post, but recaps never hurt.

In this post we will discuss the effects of frames on interactions – we will explain how setting frames affects the whole interaction – taking a macro perspective. What are good frames vs. bad frames and what roles do they play?

Next week we will move on to take a micro perspective and discuss how frames are set in the different sequences of an interaction. Let’s get on with it.

Do Pickup Lines Work on Women?

Darwin Niwrad's picture

By: Darwin Niwrad

Do pickup lines work on women
Do pickup lines work on women? Yes, but canned lines can backfire if you don’t know how and when to use them. Here’s how to make your lines work for you.

Pickup lines – can’t screw with them, can’t screw without them.

The first thing I want to address here is that you shouldn’t let anyone tell you that master seducers don’t use canned lines. Whether they’re technically pickup lines, stories, quips, jokes, whatever... everyone uses them. Because they work.

The important thing here is that it’s difficult to know what will work, when you should use lines, how you should use them, where you should use them, and on whom you should use them.

There are a plethora of pickup lines tailored for a plethora of female personalities and situations, so for women you just met, you’re likely just rolling the dice by using a pickup line. With experience, you simply gain the ability to make educated guesses.

Highly-skilled guys have the advantage of experience, which gives them a better idea of what to say to particular girls, and whether to use a canned line or craft something on the spot that’s more natural and unique.

And not only do you have to consider a line’s effect on particular girls, you also must understand what type of person you are to know what works well for your body language, attitude, and style.

7 Misconceptions About Pickup and Seduction

Tony Depp's picture

By: Tony Depp

Misconceptions About Pickup and Seduction
The seduction community has its share of critics who portray pickup artists as unnatural and manipulative. Here’s why we don’t see it that way.

Remember that classic line from the movie Fight Club? What was the first rule? Oh yeah, don’t talk about Fight Club. And in that movie, almost everyone broke the rule.

The result? The ranks exploded, and they were branded a terrorist organization.

When I first got into pickup, I joined a men’s pickup artist group called the Montreal Lair. It was run by a guy named Cliff who was made Internet-famous by that book The Game. He made me sign a non-disclosure agreement, promising not to talk about the group. “Media has infiltrated us before. We need to protect the identity of our members,” he told me.

Since then pickup artistry has gone mainstream.

Now YouTubers have in-field videos with millions of views. Books on the subject have sold millions of copies, and websites like Girls Chase get millions of readers per month. Yet we hide.

Tactics Tuesdays: Fresh Stories to Tell to Girls

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

storytelling seductionYou should always have a few fresh, recent stories to tell about your life.

These don't have to be particularly amazing stories. But they should be a little interesting, they should be recent, and they should display some interesting trait about you.

For instance, do you ever get people run up to you with strange requests? Four days ago I was at a Starbucks, eating a yogurt cup and reading my Kindle. They have this low-fat yogurt at Starbucks that is horrible. I don't know who wants yogurt with the fat out. But if you get the mixed berry yogurt, you can scoop up some berry and granola with the yogurt so it isn't too awful.

Well, I'm sitting there at this table by the window by myself, and I notice some girl hovering nearby. She looks like she's looking out the window, but I think she wants something.

Anyway, I go back to my book and my slightly awful low-fat yogurt.

The girl suddenly appears again, right at my table, and interrupts my reading. She says excuse me, do you have WhatsApp on your phone?

I look at her. She's pretty. But her face is glistening like she's been running a marathon or has a gland problem or something. And she looks all serious and distracted.

I can't tell if she's trying to meet someone and lost her phone, if she's using this as an excuse to meet me, or if she wants to steal my phone.

"I need to log into my WhatsApp account to check my messages," she tells me.

"Oh, sorry," I say. "I don't have WhatsApp."

But she doesn't leave. She just stands there, with her glistening face and her serious, distracted look.

"Oh," she says. "Because I thought everyone has WhatsApp. I just need to log into my account."

I don't know if she didn't hear me or what. She's not even really looking at me now, just glancing around as if scanning for predators. I do a quick mental calculus of "Do I want to go out of my way to help this random sweaty distracted chick? Do I want to tell her she can download WhatsApp to my phone, then sit there and watch her like a hawk while she uses it to make sure she doesn't make a break to run out of Starbucks with it?"

Instead I just tell her "Sorry, I don't have it."

She stands there for another moment, still looking sweaty and distracted. Finally she says "Okay, thanks" and walks off.

I notice her 15 minutes later over at some long table in the Starbucks, texting on a phone, still looking sweaty and serious but now laser-focused on whatever she's texting. So I guess she found someone to lend her a phone.

I dunno, what would you do in that scenario? I might've been more inclined to lend her my phone if she'd used a napkin first and wiped all that sweat off.

Keep Girls Interested in Casual Relationships with the Silent Method

Pablo Garcia's picture

By: Pablo Garcia

keep girls interested in casual relationships
Casual relationships tend to fizzle out quickly, but sometimes we don’t want them to! Here’s a method to boost her attraction for you and keep her interested.

I have a bunch of good friends in the pickup industry, and we often have interesting chats about different topics in the niche. During a recent back-and-forth, we came across the subject of keeping girls interested longer-term in casual relationships.

Casual relationships don’t usually last very long, but sometimes we’d like them to!

Over the years, I have developed a killer method for keeping girls in my rotation, and this also applies to how I deal with them in texts; most other pickup artists are using other methods. My friends found my ideas interesting, and when applied, they got excellent results!

So they asked me to write this article to enlighten our readers about this important topic. I always was and am still interested in ways to keep a hot and intelligent girl in my rotation long-term, so I have developed a special way of handling girls and so that you keep them invested and chasing you.

5 Politically-Incorrect but Crucial Signs of a Healthy Relationship (Video)

Hector Castillo's picture

By: Hector Castillo

What makes a healthy relationship?

If you're not familiar with me or Girls Chase, this video might really mess with you.

My idea of what makes a healthy relationship might be seen as toxic by a lot of the world, but seeing as how a lot "mainstream" relationships are actually toxic, why not get another perspective?

So here you go...

Why Frame Control Is the Most Important Tool in Seduction

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

frame control most important seduction tool
Frame control makes the difference between becoming her lover or getting stuck in her friend zone. If you want sex with the women you meet, this information is vital.

Hey, guys. Today I want to discuss how frame control can impact the entirety of your interactions with women, especially in terms of seduction and sleeping with the women you meet – rather than becoming just friends.

I will get a bit deeper into what effects frames have on how you interact and why it is key to set the right frames early. Failing to do so can make it very difficult to reach your goals with a girl, no matter what they are.

Many guys see seduction and pickup as a linear process – i.e., a set of techniques or steps that follow each other. To some extent, this is true – if you look at pickup from a micro perspective. But you cannot leave out the big picture – how each step of the process affects the others; or more importantly, how previous steps affect future steps.

This is so critical. It is exactly what most guys tend to forget about. Everything builds on previous steps. This post aims to explain how these mechanisms work so that you can gain a better understanding of your game and perhaps, in turn, better it.

To give you some examples of what I am talking about, consider the following:

  • Guy cannot get out of the friend zone – despite his efforts in applying the latest and most powerful pickup tech, he is still stuck there.

  • Guy meets girl, she laughs, touches him, but he totally fails to escalate – she is just not a sexual girl (so you think). Similarly: Guy has a perfect date – now faces last-minute resistance from hell.

  • Guy displays high social value, but all he gets is “take my Instagram” when interacting with girls.

All these issues can be caused by a failure in setting the right frames – or at least, avoiding setting the wrong ones in the first place. The frame you set when you meet will dictate the interaction and will only be amplified with time throughout the interaction(s). The more the frame is set (good or bad), the harder it is to get out of it.

In the case of the friend zone, the guy is stuck because he has been perceived as a friend because of his previous actions, but more importantly, because of the frames he has set through his presence, actions, and so on. And as times goes on, the frame becomes stronger and harder to get out of.

Many of you are familiar with what a frame is and how it comes into play, but for those of you who are unfamiliar with the concept, I highly advise that you check out the following posts after reading this one.