How do you become magnetic? The kind of guy who DRAWS attention to him, even when he's not currently doing anything.
He has... PRESENCE.
It feels like the air is different. The lighting.
He has a physical effect on the environment around him. How else can it be described?
Well, I can TEACH you how to become magnetic.
Watch.
In a non-monogamous relationship, is it ethical to keep your partners in the dark about each other? Let’s explore the reasons why it is – for you and for them.
Girls Chase reader Damien asked me a question about a relationship he had with a woman that lasted two years in a non-monogamous setup. He noted that his girlfriend was mostly drama-free and easy to manage, which is the way it should be.
However, Damien also mentioned that he felt like he was lying to her at times by withholding information about what he was doing with other girls. I thought this was an interesting topic to explore in the context of this system and non-monogamy in general.
Damien writes:
““I had a non-monogamous relationship for two years where I ran things exactly like described in this article, but it always felt like I was lying to the girl (even though I was just not telling her the details). Also, that girl was low-drama and easy to manage.”
Contents
2. A Man’s Purpose as a Protector of Women
3. How Does This Fit into the Harem System?
So, should a man tell his partner about all his activities, or is it better for him to protect his partner by withholding certain information that he knows could be harmful to their relationship? It’s a tough question, one that is worthy of an article because it’s the central concept of understanding how the harem system works – and all implicit systems.
We’re going to explore the ethics and philosophy behind the harem system. As you’ll see, the system was not designed to enable men to lie to women – quite the opposite. It was designed to protect and sustain women and to look out for their interests.
It’s a non-monogamous system, so it does largely cater to men. After all, it’s an innate male desire to have sex with many different partners, and there’s no getting around that. For women, the system holds a different promise, and most of it is dependent on the man.
Even monogamous guys who have been with the same woman in a loving relationship for many years feel a desire for other kinds of pussy. Not every guy gives in to their desires, but I do know many men and women in monogamous setups who do, which might make it the most dishonest agreement of all. It’s not just men that have a desire to sleep around. Often, women share the same level of horniness as men – or even more so.
Emotionally, women always desire to be with the strongest man in the pool and seek commitment and security with that man exclusively. Sexuality, however, can be very different.
Most times, a woman won’t cheat on her man or even consider sleeping with other men if she’s sexually satisfied by her main partner, because there’s no reason for her to. With this in mind, let’s talk about the implications of the system.
The minimalist approach to pickup is making its rounds in the community. But many don’t understand certain aspects of it that make it anything but an easy fix.
Hello again, guys.
This post aims to debunk the trend of minimalistic or simplified approaches to getting women, which have become more popularized recently. These include “meet-vibe-escalate-close” approaches. I will also explain exactly why it is that they don’t work. There are no quick fixes – sorry!
Contents
1. The Issues with Minimalistic Game
2. The Birth of Non-Verbal Seduction
3. Was It All About Status and Looks?
The last few years, more minimalistic forms of night game have become more popular, not only among seduction newbies and the “less dedicated” cold approachers but also in general across the mainstream seduction community.
They rely primarily on vibe, state, and physical escalation. This style is popular because it does work sometimes, but not often enough, in my opinion. And if done badly, it can lead to total disaster. The blueprint is supposedly simple, consisting of:
If you fail, then go home and jack off or move on to next girl (unless the club is closing soon).
Not a perfect game plan, but it does work occasionally, and the blueprint is a simple one. It seems many men favor this minimal approach when it comes to meeting women.
Flow state is when you feel natural, and whatever it is you’re doing just works and is enjoyable. But how do you find it, especially when it comes to attracting women?
You’ve probably seen an advanced seducer in action before and didn’t even realize it.
That’s the beauty of advanced game – it doesn’t look or feel like “game” in any sense. It’s more a way of expressing yourself so purely and subtly that the girl you approach doesn’t feel any discomfort or ulterior motive. It doesn’t cause bystanders to take notice (unless you want it to) and the whole interaction feels “normal.”
A woman who experiences a man with amazing game will likely describe him as “fun” or “interesting,” whereas a guy who lacks skill won’t even make an imprint on her.
Advanced game is almost an oxymoron because it’s a state of “normalcy.” Where a beginner will go out with the intent to meet women, the advanced man just is. He’s become what he’s wanted to be for years – a healthy, libidinous male with mesmerizing social skills.
He is one who’s not willing to passively wait for chance. He presses the game of odds by spinning the wheel – as often as necessary – until he wins or goes bust.
But to the girl, even though he’s “normal,” there’s also something special about this guy. He’s different somehow. But what is it that makes him different? From her perspective, it’s like watching two different movies. One is a B-movie with bad actors and poor writing.
You know you’re watching a bad movie because the poor performances dismantle your suspension of disbelief. You might still watch the film for entertainment’s sake, but these are actors, the ghosts aren’t real, and the sets are CGI. When you watch an A-grade actor in an Oscar-worthy performance, you’re whisked away to another world.
It’s the difference between Jurassic Park 5 and Lord of the Rings. One movie has you laughing rather than crying as a T-Rex chomps the lead character to bits – the other has you in tears of sorrow for the loss of Gandalf to the Balrog. It’s your emotional investment in a situation that feels more real than real life.
A girl who experiences a great seducer won’t text her friends “Some guy just approached me,” but rather “I just met this guy, wow!” It’s as if she just met Brad Pitt. He comes across as an A-lister rather than a cartoon character or an NPC in a video game.
We all know that communicating emotion is a critical element in attracting women. But how does one make her “feel” in the 2-dimensional world of texting?
Contents
Texting fundamentals – I’ve wanted to talk about this for a while now.
Texting has many layers we can explore in a scholastic fashion. This will be a nerdy article for some, but it needs to be technical, or the advice won’t be as helpful as it could be.
Let’s start with emojis.
To understand how and why emojis work, let’s go through a few basic concepts of text game.
Escape women's traps and make things fun with "You're so demanding!" or "You're such a girl!" and other variants of this playful, off-balancing tease.
Here's a little tactic/tease you may use, but perhaps not enough.
When women test you or do something silly or unexpected, or when you need to put the heat back onto them, use this line:
"You're so [BLANK]!" or "You're such a [BLANK]!"
For example... at some point, a girl you've recently met asks you a super serious question about cheating in a relationship. A question there's no way to answer seriously without either qualifying or disqualifying yourself. A question seemingly designed to suck all the fun right out of the courtship. How do you proceed?
One excellent way is with "You're so [BLANK]!" Like so:
Her: So. If you were married, would you ever cheat?
You: Wow. You're such a downer! We were having fun, then all of a sudden you're assessing my value as a long-term mate.
Use a bemused, slightly endeared delivery when you use lines like this. Show her you find the situation funny and unusual, though also that she's somewhat endeared herself to you (even if she is a little weird or uncalibrated) with her silly/cute behavior.
"You're so" or "You're such a" can spin around all sorts of uncomfortable conversational situations. Questions about whether or not you're a cheater are just the start.
For each non-monogamous relationship you intend to build, you’ll inevitably have The Talk. If you manage it well and keep a solid frame, odds are she’ll hop on board.
The most defining moment in your relationships – whether in this system, monogamy, or some other kind – will always be “The Talk.”
The Talk is probably the most defining moment in the entire relationship cycle. From the moment you convert a girl from first-time sex to a relationship, to the point when you openly set the terms of the relationship, you’re preparing the girl for The Talk through your behavior, showing her exactly how you’re going to act going forward.
Contents
1. Signs That The Talk Is Coming
5. Frames Before, During, and After The Talk
The purpose is to set a frame she’s not likely to have ever heard from a guy before – you’re non-monogamous, and you’re going to see other people while you’re with her.
After The Talk, over time, she will either accept these terms or auto-reject entirely. If you want to keep a girl as a non-monogamous girlfriend while retaining the freedom to date other women – with her blessing – then The Talk is critical.
The reason The Talk is essential is that, up until that point in your relationship with a girl, the most significant anxiety she’ll have around the relationship is knowing where it’s all going.
By this point, you’ve probably been seeing each other for several weeks or months, and since girls have a very limited timeline to enter into relationships and achieve commitment, she wants to be sure she's investing in the right man.
You, on the other hand, need to tell her subtly yet directly that she’s not investing in any “normal” relationship status – and by “normal,” I mean standard, social monogamy. Instead, she’s entering a custom relationship style – one where you care about her and want to see her as your girlfriend, but you’re going to be dating and sleeping with other women.
During The Talk, you’re going to tell her this openly and honestly, and she’ll understand it perfectly. You’re also required to set it up in such a way that you have the best chance of you both getting what you want in the end.
Some people might not agree to this principle, but I can tell you from experience that at least 80% of the women I’ve been with have stuck around after The Talk to date me, sometimes over a long period. Others drop out immediately, and that’s fine.
The beauty of the harem system is that women can step into and out of the harem at any time, something we’re going to address in Part 8 of the series. You should never be concerned about a girl leaving because she rejects the system – in my experience, it’s usually temporary.
Part of the freedom of the harem system – or any implicit non-monogamous system – is that the partners can do whatever they want, providing they’re respectful to each other.
As the dominant partner who will be introducing the system to your girlfriends and essentially asking for their compliance to buy into it, you will be principally responsible for their well-being and how well they understand it.
It's entirely up to you to teach your girls the way you want them to act in this relationship style. The best way to do this is through your behavior, which you’ll back up with The Talk. This is the most defining moment of your relationship, so treat it with respect.
When we jump the gun and learn specialized aspects of a new skill before getting a solid foundation, the skill can become imbalanced and riddled with holes.
I recently took a short hiatus from seduction to reflect upon its deeper nature.
During that time, I got into boxing, and I have been observing seduction in as much detail as I can to try to reach a new level of understanding. In doing so, I’ve realized something about getting good with women – or anything, for that matter. It relates to how and where we apply our effort and how to get the best possible results without wasting time and energy.
Contents
With boxing, I have spent the past year ensuring that every aspect of what I do inside the ring is 100% technically accurate. If I discovered a single flaw, I used drills, exercise, and good old-fashioned hard work to fix it. I lost weight, removed the rust I had accumulated, and changed my foundation as a boxer from head to toe. I worked on my footwork, guard, head movement, hand speed, jab, combinations, counters, and overall conditioning.
It was tough, but I’ve started turning heads as my technical skill has become more apparent. I am entering a new phase where technical ability is non-negotiable. I am capable of all the things that make a decent boxer. However, I realize this is not the end of the road.
To progress further, I have had to let go of ideas of what might be good enough to beat most fighters and start thinking about what is good enough to win against a specific opponent. I’ve made the shift from “good enough” to genuinely commanding my fate.
This is something that is true in seduction as well. At first, we must gain enough ability that it is no longer a case of if we can get a girl, but when. We do so by acquiring universal strengths, traits, and attributes that help us achieve that level of confidence.
After this goal is attained, we then face a tough period where we question what we want, and on the other side of that soul searching is a whole new phase of learning.
Attraction isn’t the end-all in getting women into bed. In fact, too much of it can complicate things. Here’s why focusing more on compliance is the way to go.
Hey, guys. Not too long ago, I wrote a theoretical piece stating my definitions of attraction and compliance and how I distinguish between them. The goal of that post was to clarify:
Contents
1. Attraction and a Lack of Compliance
3. Attraction and Auto-Rejection
The confusing paradox of “attraction is there naturally” – i.e., that attraction is not something you create, but either is or isn't there – and the idea of “building attraction”
The difference between them – attraction being an emotional drive that causes a person to feel emotions towards another versus creating a state of mind that makes another person comply with your demands
How this all plays out in the field
Today, I want to discuss this even further. I believe that compliance is a more powerful tool than attraction, and therefore something you should strive for. The reason behind this is that attraction, once you reach a certain level, becomes a double-edged sword that can work against you.
The assumption is that attraction leads to compliance. This is true in many cases – if a girl likes you, she will be very likely to follow your lead and comply with your demands. However, as we will discuss here, attraction can sometimes make a girl less compliant. We will explore why that is.
To reach the top level of the most socially successful men, you have to hustle harder than almost anybody else.
Guys arrive at Girls Chase with all sorts of different ambitions.
Many guys just want a girlfriend. Some want to lose their virginities, or break a long dry spell. Others are fresh out of a marriage, bouncing back from divorce.
I don't talk about going for really outsize results a lot... because most guys don't really want to be one of the 10 coolest guys in town, or pile up 120 lays. Even if a guy starts out with "That's what I want!" usually past a certain point he realizes actually, he's happy where he ended up: some cool friends, a decent number of notches, a hot & caring girlfriend.
Usually I assume that, beyond that, if a guy is serious about stupidly, ridiculously outsize results -- like, being in the top of the top of men out there -- he'll realize, naturally, that he has to hustle his ass off for a protracted time to get there.
But it occurs to me now that perhaps not everybody does realize that.
One of the confusing things for me over the years has been guys who comment on Girls Chase regularly and talk about the outsize results they want but don't show outsize hustle in pursuit of those results.
While it's true the material on GC will speed and ease your journey, it's a bit like having an expert guide on a mountain climb. The guide will help (a lot!)... but you still have to climb the mountain.
There are no helicopter rides to the top of Mount Everest. Helicopters mostly can't even go that high (they can't usually generate enough lift). If you want to get there, you must train on lesser mountains, you must train rigorously; you must get a good guide, and then you must do lots and lots and lots and lots of very hard work. Most people who set out to make that climb never make it to the top; they content themselves with smaller achievements, when they realize they're happy with those smaller achievements... or that the cost for greater ones is too great for them.
