Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

A Perceptive Man, a Responsive Man, a... Sensitive Man?

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

sensitive man
The word ‘sensitive’ has lost it’s old meaning. It now means something weak or womanly. But what it used to be was something so much more.

I think we need to reclaim the word ‘sensitive’.

The word no longer means what it’s supposed to mean.

Somewhere along the line, it grew warped, twisted. Perverted. Now, if you call a man ‘sensitive’, it’s a backhanded compliment, at best. You’re calling him a motherly nurturer. At worst, you’re saying he overreacts, is too emotional, and too womanly.

But it hasn’t always meant this. And in fact, the concept it used to describe – a concept we no longer have a perfect word for in English anymore, if we yield ‘sensitive’ completely to too-soft men and guys who think the friend zone is the surest path to sexy times – is one every man who wants to do well socially, romantically, or sexually must ultimately strive to make use of, or perpetually struggle.

Book Review: The Enlightened Sex Manual by David Deida

Varoon Rajah's picture

By: Varoon Rajah

enlightened sex manual
Ejaculation needn’t be the end of sex. It’s possible to control your ejaculation, to make sex far more pleasurable… For you AND her.

Human sexuality can be as simple or as complex as we desire. In our media and popular culture the parameters of sexuality are often dumbed down. One night stands are promoted as we grow up in the “get drunk, party, fuck” environment portrayed throughout media, artificial pleasures like porn and toys endure, and the purpose of sex becomes either short-lived hedonistic gratification or family rearing procreation.

Lost is a spiritual element informing how our sexual organs are wired straight to our brain and how our whole body is linked sexually... how our mental state can be affected through sexuality... and how our sexuality can be influenced by our mind.

Cultures of long ago had stumbled upon this knowledge, creating foundations for healthy human sexuality – the Kama Sutra, Tantra, Karezza to name a few – but all are commonly misunderstood in today’s society (e.g., the Kama Sutra is not just a book of sex positions). Today we settle for short, five-minute shags where the man ejaculates hard and fast, and the girl doesn’t cum HARD in a way that opens her psyche – it’s over, and we move on.

By connecting the realm of the brain – spirituality and emotions – with those of our physiology and sexuality – our genitals and how we use them with a partner – we can create a new level of awareness that ties pleasure with raising our level of awareness and purpose. We can create and deliver earth-shattering orgasms that transform our psyche and leave us with replenishing instead of wasted energy.

Today’s book review of The Enlightened Sex Manual by David Deida begins with this powerful statement:

“Good artists are skilled, but great artists convey an immense depth of feeling through their expertise. The same goes for the art of sex. A good lover knows how to make the body sing, But a great lover, a superior lover, evokes a vast choir of bliss…The Enlightened Sex Manual shows how to transform the often willy-nilly flow of stimulated genital energy into a profound depth of feeling, openness, and embodied ecstasy.”

p. 1

What to Do When She Giggles or Jokes (Hint: Don't Break Tension!)

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

girl giggles
When a girl giggles or jokes in response to sexual tension, it doesn’t mean she isn’t interested. Instead, it usually means she IS.

In my last post, which was the second part of this series on sexual tension, we discussed how one can create sexual tension by focusing on these elements (simultaneously):

  1. Presence:

    • Using a poker face that doesn’t reveal much – which also creates intrigue and mystery

    • Having a neutral body language

  2. Sexualization (using physical escalation tools and following a ladder):

    • Escalating till we reach the so-called “sweet spot” and stay there in order to allow the tension to unfold and grow bigger and bigger

    • However, the golden rules of calibration still apply

  3. Additionally:

    • Make things mutual

    • Slow the pace down

If you want more details, go ahead and reread part two.

In the comment section beneath part one of this series (where I lay down the “theoretical groundwork”), a reader named Jimbo shared a few concerns:

“The thing is that when I turn the tension sexual, whether from silence or not, and the girl breaks the tension by making a joke or something, I just figure she doesn't see me as a potential mate and move on. That mostly happens with acquaintances or girls I've known for a while. But I never thought of reengaging it later on.”

Jimbo’s concern is a common one. When he attempts to create sexual tension with a girl, she reacts by making silly remarks, giggling, cracking jokes. This is because she is a bit uncomfortable with the tension. This is a normal thing – most girls you encounter will react this way, some more than others. Occasionally you will be lucky and deal with girls who do not show signs of discomfort whatsoever when building up the tension.

Before I move on, I would like to make it clear that her reaction is not some indirect way of communicating that she doesn’t see Jimbo as a lover. Oftentimes it is quite the opposite… she reacts that way exactly because Jimbo triggers butterflies in her stomach. I hope this post will give clarification to this statement.

I will dedicate this entire post to this subject – maintaining the tension and dealing with discomfort related to sexual tension. I will illustrate this process by covering 3 levels of sexual tension. You will see how going from one level to the next affects the interaction. I will also dedicate a big portion of this post to how one navigates through these levels. The idea is that the “levels” that I am about to cover will help you make sense of what is going on, and the rest of the post will be practical solutions to the issue at hand.

The Slave to Pussy™ Argument

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

slave to pussy
Some men argue that to learn game is to be a “slave to pussy”. Is this argument valid? Or is it a flawed argument that misses the big picture?

If you’ve been working on your game for any not too-short period of time, you’ve probably heard the Slave to Pussy™ Argument. That argument goes something like this:

“Don’t waste your time on girls, you’re just being a slave to pussy. Instead you should be hunting, fishing, working out, stacking money, and making something of yourself. Let the women come to you.”

I suppose you might also call this the Field of Dreams Argument: if you build it, they will come.

Get rich enough, jacked enough, and masculine enough first. Then, girls will begin to pop into your life all on their own.

Obviously, if you know me, or this website, you know I’m going to tell you this argument is bunk. The idea that you don’t need to learn game to do better with girls (or put in the practice to solidify that game) is one we’ll tear apart here.

But before we even dive into these arguments, I’ll point out one simple flaw of this argument. That is its setup of game (learning to do well with girls) and fundamentals (turning yourself into a man with attractive passive value) as two opposing, mutually exclusive forces – when the truth is, these two forces are complementary. That is to say, learning game does not stop you from working out or stacking money; and you should develop yourself in multiple ways (yes, learn game, but also lift, and improve your financial prospects too. And read a lot of good books). We’ll dive into this further below... But first, a comment on the men who don’t even think your fundamentals are worth improving.

Night Game Process: Podcast with Alek Rolstad

Varoon Rajah's picture

By: Varoon Rajah

Hey there! Varoon Rajah here. Welcome to the Girls Chase Dating Mechanics Podcast, my show on the Girls Chase channel. For today’s podcast, we have longtime Girls Chase contributor Alek Rolstad.

Alek’s back for a rip-roaring look at picking up girls at nighttime. Included in this interview is an example pickup of Alek’s, and a few of Alek’s incredible sexual game techniques.

Tactics Tuesdays: How to Find and Bed a Freak

Pablo Garcia's picture

By: Pablo Garcia

pick up a freak
BDSM isn’t only fun. It offers a unique way to screen girls for quick sex – and a unique way to excite their interest for it, too.

No doubt you are familiar with Fifty Shades of Grey, the BDSM-based romance novel that took the female reading public by storm (and even outsold the Bible).

Fifty Shades of Grey is about a guy who ties his girl up, spanks her, and bones her in many beautiful and brutal ways. This book has normalized a very taboo sexual fantasy among many women. The result of this is that more women go around and wonder how it would feel to be sexually dominated. So basically, women of all ages are now more likely to be open to try something new and freaky in the sexual realm.

This site is about practical learning, so I will give you some practical tips about how to spot, attract, and bed women who may be more likely to have these fantasies. Actually, the majority of guys out there have not tried this before, and this fact leaves girls frustrated. Most guys give their girls more conventional sex because of fear of leaving their secure comfort zones.

If you give girls a more BDSM-oriented experience, you actually offer something rare that only a handful of men can provide. You become that unique guy who stands out from the rest of the men and offers her a unique sexual experience.

(Get familiarized with the BDSM world and learn what you like. This is crucial if you want to succeed with the techniques this article provides you with.)

What is Masculinity? (or: Are You Man Enough)

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

masculinity
What is masculinity? Who defines it – who makes the rules? Is it intrinsic, or culturally determined? And is it even “real”?

Sometime back, I came across an intriguing double bind.

I found it in the comments section of some feminist website, on an article written by a man about his enjoyment of pegging (i.e., when a man lets a woman shag him with a strap-on). Some male commenter had insulted this writer, and called him less than a man.

But then, the feminist readers of the website piled onto this commenter. And they all had the same attack line for him:

“What’s the matter, are you not man enough to take it up the butt?”

It’s a fascinating rhetorical device. Either you agree to receptive anal sex, which has profound effects on the male psyche (anecdotally, men who receive anal sex become more feminine, moodier, and bitchier), effectively making you no longer a full ‘man’... Or you don’t agree to receptive anal sex, in which case you are ‘not man enough’.

This double bind got me thinking: what is masculinity, anyway? How do we define what is or isn’t masculine? Who in our society holds the right to craft these definitions, women or men? Is masculinity decided by the society, by the man, or by something else?

The answers will intrigue you, I think.

And don’t worry – in the end, we’ll address that feminist double bind attack too, and show how a firm concept of masculinity makes attacks like these run off you like water.

How to Create Sexual Tension with Women

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

sexual tension
In Part II of the sexual tension series, Alek lays out prerequisites, rules, and tactics used to build sexual tension with women.

Hey guys, and welcome to the second installment in this series of articles about sexual tension. Last time, we discussed the pillars of sexual tension, which are:

  • Intrigue
  • Mystery
  • A sexual state of mind
  • A state of limbo
  • A natural thing between men and women

We didn’t get much into how it is created or maintained. But now, with the theoretical groundwork in place, you know what sexual tension entails and how you can identify it. This knowledge will, of course, help you generate it, but I believe more practical tools are required to be able to generate sexual tension on command – and do so consistently.

So the way I plan on describing this is to first discuss some quick important factors so that I can dedicate the rest of this post to the most important and most juicy skills. This post will focus on creating sexual tension and will be a purely practical post. My next post will be about how to maintain it (equally important), and will also be purely practical.

Shall we begin?

How to Beat Your Girlfriend’s Double Binds

Varoon Rajah's picture

By: Varoon Rajah

double bind
Girls use double binds on their mates more often than you might realize. But it isn’t always easy to defeat these – and lots of guys try and fail.

It was a wild night. A girlfriend of mine came over after work and we had incredible sex – multiple hard sessions, one over 60 minutes – until early in the weekday morning. “That was sooooo amazing, I loved it!” she said as she fell asleep on me, spent and exhausted. The lights were on, and we didn’t even get up to brush our teeth.

The next morning, we went at it again, and after some cuddling I woke up and began to meditate as usual – my morning routine. My girl got up to shower and get ready as I did this. She had to leave for work before me, so I carried on with my meditation, taking time to achieve the right mind state, beginning what would later be an awesome, productive day.

As I was on the ground, my eyes closed, delving into the depths of my breathing and vision, I heard her come out rustling her clothes and jacket on. I could tell she was about to leave, but I wasn’t done meditating. She circled around me but I paid no attention. After a few minutes, she walked toward the door.

“I’m leaving! Kiss me!” She said aloud hoping to get my attention. She was already by the door. But I was still on the ground meditating.

I wasn’t done, and she was interrupting me.

“I hate you!” she said aloud, noticing that I didn’t acknowledge her.

I opened my eyes and looked at her.

She said it again. “I HATE YOU!” She said this with a stern face as I looked at her still sitting on the ground.

I was coming out of my meditative state, and I gave her a blank look, holding eye contact. She frowned a little bit more and looked at me sternly, disappointingly, waiting for me to get up and see her out the door. I held my eye contact, and then turned my blank face into a devilish smile.

She abruptly broke her stern frame, transforming into a most subtle smile, then yelled out again, “I hate you…” more gently and calmly.

We paused, still holding eye contact. Then I blew her a kiss, smiling. She blew me a kiss, her face transformed into a huge smile. She grabbed the door handle, opened it, and left.

I was still sitting on the ground. I closed my eyes again and went right back to my meditation.

She texted me later in the day: “Sorry that I kind of messed up your meditation this morning,” followed by “Although I had a great night last night!”

I passed another Double Bind. One of many I’ve seen with this girl... and with others.

2 Steps Forward, 1 Step Back

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

two steps forward, one step back
Two steps forward, one step back. It’s the magic technique that lets you bypass almost all of her resistance… And it’s not hard to do.

One of the more enduring seduction strategies, and one you’ve seen discussed on this site plenty before (especially in some of Alek’s articles), is that of “two steps forward, one step back.”

You may call it push-pull or fractionation. Or you might call it the zigzag path to victory (victory here being, needless to say, a new lay or new girlfriend). Two steps forward, one step back is, on the surface, a crystal clear, simple system:

  1. First, a bold move forward (e.g., you place your hand on her lower back)

  2. Then, a partial retreat back (to, say, your hand on her upper arm)

  3. Wash, rinse, repeat: go bolder still next time... then another partial retreat. Then again. And again

With this method, you may gradually acclimate a girl to touch, proximity, innuendo, or just about anything else. Yet as simple as it sounds, it is a major mindset shift. To use it well, you must shift from the typical mindset of “gain a toehold, then hang onto it for dear life.”

To help you do this, today we’ll talk about the method, and introduce you to the psychology.

Then, we’ll load you up with examples till you’re plum happy.