Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad | Girls Chase
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Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad

When to Qualify a Girl You're Chatting Up

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By: Alek Rolstad

when to qualify a girlQualifying a girl is a vital courtship tool. Yet, is it better to do it early, before she’s gotten into it, or to wait until she’s more invested?

Hey guys. Welcome back. Last time, I discussed qualification, what it was, and how it works. It’s your to-the-point guide to qualification.

Here’s a recap.

Qualification shows interest:

  • Without appearing needy and supplicating
  • Without losing value and frame
  • By increasing her comfort level
  • By making her backward-rationalize her attraction to you
  • By creating a deeper connection between you two

How do you accomplish this?

  • Have her qualify naturally by bringing up an interesting subject she can relate to, agree with, or share an experience with.

  • Use a qualifier to trigger qualification: “are you X?” Her positive response means she is qualifying.

  • Use an assumption: “you seem X.” If she agrees and it is a positive assumption (“you seem like a caring person”), she is qualifying. If you make a negative assumption (although playful, like “you are trouble”), and she says no, she is qualifying.

  • Use disqualification: “You are sadly not X, so it will not work between us.” If she disagrees, she is qualifying.

  • Non-verbally to qualify by mutual touch or hand holding.

You may qualify her, but you should also qualify back. This is the moment you show interest.

  • Express a positive attitude toward her qualification: “I love that you are X.” Or “I am happy you are not X.”

  • Spontaneously qualify by expressing an opinion, an experience, or a story that matches hers. Do not overdo it.

Qualification should go both ways. You are testing her compliance level while creating an excuse for why you like her. This is crucial.

Since qualification goes both ways, it creates mutuality and intimacy, which provides many benefits, including comfort, boosted compliance, and less resistance.

So today, let’s discuss when you should qualify. We will begin by reviewing early game and two different schools of thought.

5 Ways to Qualify a Girl You're Seducing

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By: Alek Rolstad

qualify a girlWhen you qualify a girl, you let her know what you like about her. Employ these five (5) different qualifiers to move your seductions forward more easily.

Hi there, and welcome back. Today I will discuss qualification. We’ve covered this topic in multiple posts, and all approach it from different angles. They are all fantastic reads, and mastering qualification will benefit you irrelevant of your skill level (I will recap why shortly). It may not fall under “fundamentals,” but consider it more of a fundamental technique.

So, I intend to provide a “straight to the point” and “cut the crap” post on qualification. Like my earlier fractionation post, I want this to be a “simply explained” post.

If you want to delve deeper into qualification, take a look at our other posts. I’ve shared links at the end of this article.

Advanced Sex Talk: Excite Her with the Squirting Gambit

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By: Alek Rolstad

squirting gambitIf you already know how to sex talk, you’ll like this one. By discussing how to make a woman squirt, you can make her so excited she… wants you to make her squirt.

Hey guys and welcome back.

Today I’ll go through another gambit. This one is bold and explicit. The goal is to convey sexual prizing to arouse a girl. It’s a powerhouse, but it can be tricky for beginners at sex talk to pull it off. So it is more suitable for advanced guys.

Use it mid- to late-game to escalate the vibe and further sexualize your interactions. It’s ideal when you need to spike her so she agrees to go home with you or when you are back at your place and are about to seal the deal!

Of course, physical escalation is also good instead of verbals. You can combine both, although be careful that bold touching plus bold sex talk can be overkill. To learn more about when to use touch versus verbals, see part 3 of my sex talk calibration series for an in-depth discussion.

This gambit is older but very powerful. It may be harder to pull for beginners unless the vibe is strong and:

  • There is already a solid sexual frame set. This gambit can reinforce the sexual frame, not set it.

  • You have already talked about lighter sexual subjects.

With that out of the way, here is the gambit. I will start with a transition, cover the gambit, then discuss the mechanisms at play.

I’ll break down the gambit into three parts. You can view this as one gambit or three interconnected gambits.

3 Sex Talk Gambits So Bold & Explicit They Arouse Girls Instantly

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By: Alek Rolstad

arouse girls with sex talkBold, explicit sex talk can really turn a girl on. What exactly should you SAY though? Easy: use one of THESE 3 sex talk routines to melt her loins…

Hey guys. Welcome back.

Today I want to discuss three different sex talk gambits. I shared three shorter gambits a few years ago. These gambits have become popular, given student feedback from my coaching sessions and the forum comments.

See 3 Sex Gambits: Good/Bad Sex, Sex is Unfair, and the Dark Side.

These gambits are popular because they are short, easy to understand, and simple to pull off without being complex or verbose. They don’t require much memorization, as you should not try to memorize these gambits word-for-word. Instead, use these examples as inspiration and deliver the content with your OWN words, depending on the girl and context.

You may remember my post a few weeks ago when I went over light versus bold sex talk. Light talk is less explicit (but not less powerful) and more suited for the early game to hook and convey intriguing and attractive traits about you by hinting that you are a good lover. Bold sex talk conveys sexual prizing (you are a good lover); it also helps escalate the vibe and turn her on.

My last mini-gambit compilation provides a list of light gambits suited for the earlier part of the seduction process. Of course, you can use them later in your interactions; I do it often! Switching to lighter gambits between the late-game’s bolder ones can sometimes be a good call!

Note that short gambits do not make them less powerful. They can be ideal when you cannot talk for long, or it is too loud or chaotic to have deep and complex conversations.

That said, I am providing short gambits here; however, that does not mean you cannot expand upon them or spend more time elaborating on the concepts and themes of these gambits. You may even want to add additional dimensions to them. You surely can! I have done so in-field.

When to Switch to BOLD Sex Talk When Talking to Girls

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By: Alek Rolstad

bold sex talkSex talk is a tremendous way to set a sexual tone with girls. Usually going TOO bold with it is risky. Yet, in certain situations, “bold” is THE way to go…

Hey guys. Welcome back.

Last week, I discussed elements of strategic calibration when choosing between going verbal or physical as you sexualize and escalate the vibe of your interaction. It’s important to analyze when it is most beneficial to use verbals and when it is better to be physical during the interaction.

We concluded last week:

  1. Generally, in early game, if you opt for a sexual approach to seduction, it comes with pitfalls (Why You Should Set a Sexual Frame... And How to Do It), so sexual verbals may be the better choice. This allows more benefits, and fewer risks, it’s more powerful, and it facilitates later (and bolder) escalation.

  1. Often in the later part of the interaction, switching to physical game is ideal. It’s easier to pull off, more intuitive, and gets the job done. You are less likely to make mistakes choosing the easier option. And if it gets the job done, go for it.

Note that these are general rules. They should be a part of your default modus operandi.

But we all know that pickup and seduction is a complex field with many variables that affect each situation and alter your strategic choices.

So today we will discuss the situations when you should break the two rules above.

This is an advanced post suited for advanced guys who want to increase their meet-to-lay ratio. If you are a beginner, this post may be confusing. Learn to walk before you run.

The first part covers early game, where I describe situations when you should not use sexual verbals.

The second part of the post is when it gets interesting. I will make the case for bold sex talk and when it is far superior to non-verbal physical escalation.

Heating Up the Sex Talk with Girls: Verbal vs. Physical Escalation

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By: Alek Rolstad

advanced sex talk calibrationIt’s time to heat things up with her. But are you better off choosing sex talk for that, or physical escalation? It depends: one is safer, one is stabler.

Hey guys. Today I will continue the discussion of sex talk calibration. My two previous posts covered the basics of sex talk calibration, and this post enters a more advanced realm. So, this post is suited for upper-intermediate and advanced players.

Escalating the vibe and setting sexual frames, as we know, can be done verbally AND non-verbally (physically). But which is best? What are the pros and cons of each strategy?

More importantly, WHEN during the interaction would sexual or verbal game be most efficient, and when would physical game be the better call?

In an ideal world, you can choose between both depending on your preference. But we all know that we do not live in an ideal world. Many believe the choice of going for verbal over physical game, especially regarding sexual framing and escalation, depends on what you prefer. However, it does not. And this is what we will cover in this post.

It may seem appealing to say, “Why not combine them both?” That is, using both physical and verbal sexual game simultaneously. Two strategies = twice the power, right?

It isn’t that simple. Combining both can backfire and cause resistance if done the wrong way. If you want to know why and learn more about touching when talking about sex (verbal sexual game), check out this post.

Smoothly Bring Up Sex Talk with Girls (w/ Fractionated Transitions)

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By: Alek Rolstad

transitioning fractionationTo smoothly enter sex talk, it helps if you can slide the topic in with her barely even noticing. But how can you do that? With a fractionated transition.

Today I would like to share a transitioning technique with a very high success rate for smoothly getting into sex talk. I’ll go over the benefits and some cons; no worries, I will list and explain these. It’s an advanced technique and requires good conversational skills and control. Therefore, consider this an advanced post about a technique I teach my most advanced students.

We all know that transitioning into a sexual subject is great for your interaction as it sets a sexual frame and excites her. But it can be challenging to do because of the nature of the subject (women may not be comfortable talking about sex with strangers for many reasons, but mainly, it can trigger her anti-slut defense mechanism). So, there will be times when you try to transition into sex talk with whatever transitional technique you choose, and no matter what you do, it fails.

She resists, she seems aloof, she seems unexcited, and she looks uncomfortable.

If you encounter any of these reactions, the default rule is to quickly end the subject and switch to something else, as they can be forms of resistance. (But she may just find that particular sexual subject boring. However, act as if you were dealing with resistance just to be sure). It is usually best to stop talking about sex to let things cool off and attempt again later with a different topic and see if that bites.

The problem is if she shows discomfort with sex talk, then that likely will not work. Then it is not the subject that doesn’t interest her, but that she is uncomfortable talking about sex.

The go-to rule is that if sex talk doesn’t work, you should focus on something else:

  • Build compliance by showing mixed signals, demonstrating higher value, or using social proof.

  • Sexualize with physical escalation.

These are all reliable strategies in my book.

Forcing something on someone they feel uncomfortable with rarely works unless you really know what you are doing. You ideally want to use sex talk to get her. It has many benefits when it works!

For those cases, this post comes in handy. Let’s go over transitioning into sex talk with women hesitant to jump into the subject. It’s a bit tricky, but it’s not impossible, hence why this post is for advanced players.

Note that this technique will NOT work on women who show heavy resistance to sex talk. With them, just change your strategy.

Making a Girl Trust & Feel Comfortable with You (Seduction Gambit)

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By: Alek Rolstad

trust and comfort gambitBefore a girl will go to bed with you, you need to help her trust and feel comfortable enough with you to do so. How do you that? Use this gambit to begin…

Hey guys. Today, I’ll go through a gambit I love using in field lately. It is safe and low risk plus its effects are mind-blowing. It’s a two-parter, and you can use both in the early game to hook or solidify your hook or during late-game to escalate the vibe.

Before I get to the actual juice, I need to stress the points I make when writing about gambits:

  • You don’t need to know hundreds of gambits to get good results. It’s better to know some that work for you than many that work against you.

  • Ideally, you want a choice. Knowing many gambits is great so you can test different ones and select what works best.

  • Perhaps you have a bad memory or do not like memorizing gambits or canned material. In that case, these are still good for you because they serve as examples and templates for conveying attractive personality traits or set frames that make her compliant to ease the process.

  • Gambits can inspire you to create your own gambits or variations. I never deliver a gambit the same way twice. I likely deliver it differently every time because knowing the mechanism’s function and how to use it is what matters.

You can find the compilation of all gambits and related sex talk articles and guides in my compilation thread: Sex Talk Gambits Compilation (And more).

Seeding the Pull: Plausible Deniability

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By: Alek Rolstad

plausible deniabilityInviting a woman home with you is an art of itself. One part of this art is giving her plausible deniability. And one part of THAT is in seeding the pull.

Hey guys. I hope you are doing well.

Today I’ll discuss a technique that will increase your odds of having her say yes to going somewhere with you—whether it’s back to your place, her place, or another bar or location.

We call this extraction or “pulling.” It’s when you move a girl from one place to another. This differs from isolation and getting her away from her friends, usually within the venue, often in night game. Isolation can be challenging because you want to move her away from her friends. And extraction is difficult because you want to leave the venue and go somewhere else, often to your place, which she may not be comfortable with for many reasons.

Note: Isolating a girl and get getting away from her friends by bringing her back to your place counts as isolation and extraction (you can isolate through extracting). Both are crucial to master.

What’s cool is that the technique shared here is useful for both isolation and extraction. However, due to isolation’s slightly different nature, I will elaborate on how to use the technique in a future post.

The best part: this technique is deadly efficient and easy to pull off. It isn’t complex or risky; even beginners can and should use it.

Let’s begin with a recap (to go straight to the technique, skip the first section and start at “Seeding the Pull”).

This post is suited for everyone, irrelevant of skillset.

How to Persist with a Girl When She Resists You

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By: Alek Rolstad

how to persist with a girlGirls may resist when you seek to do things with them. But girls also say they like guys who persist. How do you persist with a girl the right way though?

Hey guys and welcome back.

After a few coaching sessions, I realized that I kept telling my students about an aspect of persistence that I haven’t discussed on the blog before, and it is an important one:

Should you tackle resistance head-on, or back off, let things sink in, and try again later?

In my many posts on persistence, I have advocated for “retreating and taking a few steps back” before persisting again. This advice is still valid. However, there is a nuance or an exception to this rule, which I will discuss today.

I will recap persistence and how to persist correctly before covering the exception to the rule and then explain why this exception applies.

We’re also going to talk about how to persist with a girl in two different seductive contexts here:

  1. How to persist with her when you are escalating things yet she resists

  1. And how to persist with her when you set a frame that she resists

Note: this post is advanced.