Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

How to Beat Bad Faith Arguments with the NUF Method

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

nuf method
Not every argument's made in good faith. Some are bad faith. When you encounter bad faith arguments, use NUF to beat them.

If you've had an insecurely attached or personality disordered paramour, you've almost certainly run into repeater arguments. A repeater argument is when someone uses a finite number of arguments for her position, on repeat. As you attempt to discuss each argument, she shifts to a new argument before you can achieve resolution. Then she shifts again with the next argument. Eventually you find yourself back at her original argument, and the cycle repeats. Repeater arguments are the main form of bad faith argument we'll discuss today. They aren't the only type. Yet they are the foundation of bad faith argumentation; someone arguing in bad faith will ultimately fall back to repeaters.

When you first encounter any kind of bad faith argument, you'll feel like you're going crazy. "Wait, we already talked about this argument 20 minutes ago. I thought we addressed that and moved onto your next argument?" Or "I can't understand if this person doesn't grasp what I'm saying, or is so closed minded she refuses to even consider my view?"

Next, you start to feel drained: "You're not listening at all. You use the same arguments again and again. Each time I address one, you skip to the next. Later you circle back to your earlier arguments as if we never addressed them."

Finally you realize you're locked in a one-way conversation. You listen and respond to the other person, but she won't do you the same courtesy.

You'll start to wonder: "Is she forgetting what we covered before? Is she doing this on purpose? Is she some kind of automaton with programmed responses, incapable of reflective thought? What's going on exactly?"

The more you wonder about this, the more mental and emotional energy you sink into the argument. The more fatigued you become.

Repeater arguments can be effective at causing ego depletion (i.e., the gradual 'wearing down' of willpower/resistance). Used this way, they're often effective ways for the repeater to get what she wants.

Yet, once you know how these arguments work, you can beat them. And once you can beat them, they lose most of their power over you.

How to Take Women Home Without Having the Right Social Frame

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

overcoming social frame
Having the right social frame is important for making girls feel allowed to hook up with you. But there are ways to overcome social mismatches with pure awesomeness.

Hey, guys. Today we will discuss how you can get women and score social points at a venue or social gathering where you do not fit in.

Before I get started, a word of caution: this is a seduction blog about getting women. This advice is not valid for professional lives or other situations. It may apply elsewhere, but I cannot say for sure.

Try this out in venues and situations where you have little to lose socially and economically.

Should You Expect a Falling Out After She Goes on Vacation?

Varoon Rajah's picture

By: Varoon Rajah

relationship time apart
With certain types of relationships, don’t expect things to go back to business as usual after she returns from a vacation or is away from you very long.

Over the years as you grow in the game and experience more women, you see many patterns in male and female dynamics. Men and women have different agendas. A woman’s ultimate agenda is to find and keep a provider, especially one who is high-value (but still attainable) and one she can commit to monogamously.

Monogamy is virtually the only acceptable social frame for a woman as far as dating and relationships go. Other relationship models likely don’t fit so well with the world view held by her family, friends, and peers. So she most likely always has the monogamy goal in mind, despite what she’s doing with a guy or guys in the moment.

If you’re in a committed, monogamous, and stable relationship that’s going well (this is an important condition distinction), you might not experience the pattern I describe below. Similarly, if you’re dating a girl but haven’t yet slept with her, you might be able to avoid this situation. Finally, if she already has a provider, you’re just having sex, and she’s not emotionally intertwined, you can escape unharmed.

However, for nearly every other scenario, a girl taking a vacation without you equates to the impending doom of whatever it is you have going with her. I’ve found that when a girl you’re seeing takes a vacation — like a 1-2 week vacation to a faraway place — there’s a good chance you won’t see her again. At least your relationship can fundamentally change once she returns from her trip.

This concept applies mostly to these setups:

It’s also true regardless of how much you both communicate with each other during the trip. This naturally tends to dip a little during trips per the nature of the above setups.

It can be a strange phenomenon to observe. But we have to remember that when a woman sees you regularly, she feels emotionally tied to you, especially if you’re giving her a great experience.

This fades away once she experiences a little distance.

You're Worried About Stuff She Doesn't Care About

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

she doesn't care
You might worry what she'll think of your clothes, hair, mood, or your place. But she doesn't always care about this stuff as much as you think.

There are many things men often think women care about... that they really, absolutely do NOT.

It's one of the biggest mental blocks that holds men back with women. Guy worries about something women don't care about, and proceeds to not try. "I'm too X; she won't want me. So I won't try." "I'm not Y enough; she won't want me. So I won't try." Meanwhile the reality is she doesn't care about X or Y, or not to the extent you think she does.

I have a friend who was prolific with women years back and took some time off from proper dating. He's now getting back into the swing of meeting new girls. The other day he had a sexy girl eye him up hard... another guy was hitting on her friend, and this girl wanted my buddy. But he had a few reasons to not go for her: he had to finish some work he had a deadline for, and also... his place was too dingy and dirty. He'll switch to a newer, nicer apartment in a few days and prefers to wait to pick up until then.

The work thing is understandable. But the apartment thing stuck out at me.

Because women (most women) do not care about a dingy apartment when they are into you enough.

I have slept with plenty of women in small, crummy apartments or hotel rooms.

I have shagged women in friends' filthy, crumb-filled, stained sheets that hadn't been changed in months.

I have shagged women on the dirt outside, shagged them on rocks, have gone raw on countless women I just met (most objections I've gotten to that have come during or after, rather than before). I have shagged women after not having showered for a week. I have shagged women when I had body odor they complained about (but not enough to stop the sex. Also, just for the record, my body odor is usually not bad. Not sure why it occasionally is. Diet? Stress? Who knows?). This is all stuff about which a whole lot of guys would say "Oh no, I couldn't possibly have sex with her now, because X!"

Women will tell you they care about all this stuff. But mating itself is a dirty act, and once a woman decides she wants you, dirty stuff she'd have told you would be a deal breaker other times largely stops mattering.

I grew up compulsively clean, too. It took me time to get over that, and to realize all but the most germophobic women do not care about it, when they want you. I get a kick out of dirty lays today. It's a bit of a thrill to be some girl's dirty man. Many guys these days are too tidy to be that for her. (that said, I do usually try to keep things clean. If only for my own peace of mind)

However, this article isn't just about being a dirty lover. It's about ALL the stuff guys use to talk themselves out of taking action... yet that girls don't actually care about.

There is a lot more stuff guys think women care about that they don't than dirty apartments, sheets, showers, or smells.

Harnessing the Seductive Power of the Dark Triad

Tony Depp's picture

By: Tony Depp

dark triad seduction
Women are instinctively attracted to men with dark triad qualities. But you don’t have to be a psychopath to capitalize on that. The first step is learning to not care.

Have you ever felt like you’re being watched? Like Big Brother or the Eye of Sauron is gazing down upon you, judging your actions, biding its time before sending in the Gestapo to whisk you off to some dungeon?

You’re not alone.

This is what many men feel like when they’re doing pickup. That they’re being watched, and what they’re attempting to do is so morally reprehensible that it’s practically criminal. The current political climate adds to these fears, no doubt.

It’s such a common issue that I’ve written dozens of articles and could probably write an entire book on the subject. I might call it:

The Unapologetic PUA: How to Not Care What People Think

In regards to picking up girls, if you want to be great at it, you have to not care what anyone thinks about you. You must be:

  • Not in your head worrying yourself out of approaching
  • Present, calm, and charming when you do approach

It’s what men spend years attempting to master. To become soulless approach-robots with one aim in life: to have sex with hot girls!

"I'm Doing Everything to Succeed with Women but It's Still Not Working!"

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

doing everything pickup seduction
If it feels like you're doing everything they told you you needed to do and it's still not working... you're probably not doing everything they told you you needed to do.

Female State Control Vaccines: Investment

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

investment and social frame
We know how getting a girl to invest in you makes it easier to get her to do what you want. But can investment also overcome a lack of social frame?

Hey, guys! Welcome back to our final article on social frame (although I may write more about it in the future if something new comes up).

Social frame is a conceptual bundle covering the social part of seduction and whether she feels it's socially okay for her to hook up with you. It considers whether you are the type of guy she usually hooks up with and whether you match with her on a level that is socially acceptable to hook up with.

Our goal with establishing a social frame is to make her feel allowed to hook up with you.

Escalation and other forms of stimulation are about making her feel a desire to hook up with us. But if she does not feel allowed to hook up with us, she may pull the plug and control her state. We have labeled this “female state control” (FSC). If you want to find out more, read my previous posts on the subject.

(This is all closely related to Chase's post on floors and ceilings; the concept is VERY relatable to social frame and female state control.)

Having a proper social frame makes her feel allowed to hook up with you, reducing the chance of her controlling her state. Or at least it buffers the FSC mechanism.

Previously we discussed three dimensions of social frame:

Today we will discuss the fourth dimension: investment. This is nothing new to the more advanced seducer, but its connection to social frame and FSC is what may be new to them. So read this. Beginners may learn the fundamentals or at least receive links to great in-depth posts.

Level Up Your Game, Pt 2: Conversations with Girls

Varoon Rajah's picture

By: Varoon Rajah

conversations with girls
Let’s discuss how you can use conversation to establish acceptable social frames, create high points and compliance, and lead innocent chit-chat toward sexual topics.

Hey guys, it’s Daniel and Varoon once again! Earlier this year we met up in Canada, went out at night, and decided to write about it.

We figure it would be a great way to better understand the pitfalls guys face when learning the game. In this 4-part series, we cover 20 tips guys can use to improve their game.

In Part 1, we covered:

  • Being Present and seeing the room
  • Paying attention to her emotional feedback
  • Remaining present in the conversation
  • Being aware of potential roadblocks
  • Internalizing tenets of textbook seductions

Now we'll cover more intricacies of conversations with women that we noticed on our trip together.

How to Tell a Story

Tony Depp's picture

By: Tony Depp

how to tell a story
Storytelling is a great skill, especially for attracting women. Getting her hooked and showcasing your good qualities all become smoother if you know how to tell a story.

Most men have no idea how to tell a story, especially one that will attract beautiful women.

I’m a writer. I have a blog with over one million written words. I’ve published multiple books, including fiction novels and a memoir, and I teach men how to talk to women. So I have a little experience with storytelling.

I’m in Kyiv, Ukraine at the moment. I’m trying to write, but I’m distracted by the waft of perfume drifting off the endless stream of long-haired, fair-skinned beauties sliding past the café in their high heels. How did I end up ten thousand miles from home, in a country that’s actively engaged in war with Russia? Was it for the women? The adventure? First, let me teach you how to tell a story.

Did that paragraph grab your attention? Were you hooked? With approaching women, the first step is to “hook” a girl (make her stop and pay attention). The first step in a story is to “hook” the audience, then captivate, amuse, charm, and attract them to you.

Tactics Tuesdays: The 3-Minute Rule

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

3-minute rule
Use the 3-minute rule before you approach a girl. If someone will disrupt you or pull her away in the first 3 minutes of conversation, don't approach her (yet).

A little while back, we covered the 3-second rule. The 3-second rule is a tactic you can use to get yourself to approach women before you lose your nerve. It's a useful rule. You won't always use it, but if you struggle with approach anxiety, it should be your default.

Today we'll talk about a different tactic called the 3-Minute Rule. Although it sounds the same, this is a different rule with a different purpose. The 3-second rule's purpose is to get you to approach. The 3-minute rule is to focus your approaches and get you to avoid time-wasters... so you can zero in on worthwhile women.

As you use this rule more, you'll find your approaches succeed more. Early pickup wildcards will bother you less. And meeting women will grow more relaxed and easier.