Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

Sex talk isn’t the only way Alek Rolstad seduces girls. Discover his full repertoire for picking up women without using his famed weapon of mass seduction.

Hey guys. I hope you are all doing great.

I was chatting with Chase the other day, discussing future articles. I share article ideas with Chase (he is better suited to tackle some topics since they are within his field of expertise) and other topics I may have more to say about.

And this is great because I am often unaware of what subjects might be interesting, and others can point out areas to discuss that I might not think of.

Here’s what Chase suggested:

It might be interesting to see “Alek’s game if sex talk doesn't take.” If a girl is highly resistant or immune to sex talk, what do you do? Just bail? Run a different type of game? If sex talk doesn't work with her, does that mean she'll be closed to sex with you, or do you need to run things with her differently?

It’s a fascinating subject because, after all these years, people know me as “the sex talk guy,” and rightfully so. I do not mind being known as this guy.

Clearly, after 15 years in this game (this summer, it will be my tenth year at Girls Chase—I started writing after being active in this field for five years), I know a bit more than sex talk. Sure, I have perfected this technique since I am undoubtedly one of the inventors. I did not invent using sexual frames, though; many great seducers have inspired me. They’ve used techniques that helped me build my methods, so my repertoire is vast.

And, if I were to use sex talk in all my interactions and outings, I would be bored to death with seduction. I use sex talk less these days, to the detriment of my success, since I consider it a weapon of mass seduction, a super powerful tool with a high hit rate. In my eyes, it is still my best weapon. But I refrain from using it more often than not because, after all these years, I am a bit bored of it. I want seduction to feel fresh and exciting. The truth is, there is a lot of great and exciting material out there.

Some material is good, some amazing, and some as powerful as my own “sex talk,” even though it will always give me superior results because I’ve mastered sex talk at its highest level.

I like to focus on different material because, to my surprise, I can use other material in combination with sex talk. Imagine adding some push and pull—showing mixed signals between sex talk gambits! It can help you “set the scene” or create the ideal setting for a smooth sex talk game (isolation, a great hook, a good social frame, and high comfort levels).

Ironically, I have become increasingly curious about material other than my own after all these years. The irony lies that I should have been curious and open-minded during my early days, not now. I would have gained far more from it back then! But I was too obsessed with sexual frames then, and the desire to create my individual style, so that I would shed away tons of great material would have worked better in many settings than my sex talk, for example, in loud clubs.

From the two previous posts discussing my earlier and recent inspirations, you can likely tell I possess a massive repertoire. Sometimes I like to switch back and forth between various methods. Some are better suited for specific settings (loud clubs, small clubs, big clubs) and others for certain dynamics (all interactions are different, and some benefit more from different approaches).

Some nights, I attempted to get girls by using pure Mystery Method, demonstrating social value and following the M3 model. (If you are not familiar with the Mystery Method, familiarize yourself with it!) However, this was more for giggles, but I made it work. For fun, I have tried using the good old-school Speed Seduction style, also for giggles, and I made this work, too.

However, I use certain styles in combination with my typical sex talk style, and I will describe those below.

Men fear doing many things with girls: approaching them, chatting them up, asking them out, making moves. Yet the more you do each, the less scary it gets.

I just went zip lining today through the canopy of a rainforest. Many of the trees in the rainforest were absolutely massive, with gigantic, girthy trunks that towered high up into the heavens. Each one of the colossal trees I zip lined off of was most likely hundreds of years old.

The very first time you go on a zip line, it’s a frightening experience. You’re dozens of feet up in the air, held aloft on a steel cable strung between two great trees high up in a mountainous jungle, with only a couple of metal clasps and a pair of cords keeping you attached. A single fall from that height could lead to broken legs, a broken back, permanent paralysis, or death. Then, suddenly, you leap off a wooden platform into oblivion, only to find yourself soaring through the air over the tops of younger, lower trees.

You reach the second platform, haven’t died or been hurt, then clip your gear to the next cable and zip line to the next tree. Then you do that again, and again, traveling across platforms, among the ancient trees of the jungle, slowly descending the mountainside until you reach the starting point some 90 minutes later. By then, you’re an old pro.

But it actually happens a lot earlier than that. By the third line you’re on zipping over treetops, there’s still a little fear there, but you don’t need to conquer it the way you did on the first and second zips. It’s moved to the background. With each zip you do, the fear gets a bit less and the thrill becomes more prominent. By the end of the zip line you’re forty feet off the ground zipping so fast over an ultra-long cable you can hear it buzzing under the stress, but you’re less fearful than you were at the beginning, with a much shorter, slower zip, over ground not nearly as far below you as it is at the end.

The fear never goes completely away. It’s a good thing, really; without fear, people get sloppy and make mistakes. And without fear, you can’t experience thrill – the feeling you get when you confront scary things and do them anyway.

This effect of ‘progressive desensitization’ – where you grow less and less fearful of scary things as you expose yourself to them and find that nothing all that terrible actually happens – is a ubiquitous part of human acclimation. It works this way for all things scary.

So it is with everything that intimidates you about girls, too.