Dating

Why Not to Talk About Game with Women


talk about game
Lots of guys talk about game with girls. But how does this affect your relationships with them? And is it worthwhile to do?

I’ve noticed a difference over the years between my natural friends and my pick up artist friends. Well, more than one difference, but this one is the topic of this article.

The difference I want to talk about today is that my natural friends never talk about game with girls. My friends who’ve intensively studied dating often do.

This one little difference echoes through their relationships with women. It affects what they talk about with girls on dates. It affects what they talk about in their relationships. And it affects (or is a product of) their thoughts.

I’m going to tell you it’s not good to talk about game with girls in this piece. You might not like that. Maybe you want to be completely open with girlfriends. You’ll see why I recommend this as we go through the article though.

And I think by the end of it, you’ll agree.

How to Be a Lovable Dick, Part 1: Why Being Nice Isn't Always Nice


lovable dick
Sometimes if you’re nice to a girl, that isn’t actually what she wants. She may want nice or she may want tough... it depends on where she’s at.

For most of 2015, I took an interesting route with my behavior.

I knew that attainability was a big barrier for most girls. They knew I was a player or heard about me being a player. Plus, I’d already come so far with my curve into becoming a Genuine Man (and you can read my massive 10 article series on that journey).

So, I decided to test the boundaries of niceness. How completely sweet, caring, and doting could I be with a girl and still dominate her, turn her on, and ravage her like a savage animal?

The answer? Very.

An interaction can go from meeting her to sleeping with her with nothing but smiles, sweet words, loving staring contests, and incessant compliments. Even if she has a borefriend, too (always thought you needed to position yourself as a careless asshole to juxtapose against his capitulating and needy behavior).

However, I also went a bit too far in my niceness. I let girls act aloof, sassy, bitchy, and rude, with no consequence whatsoever. I even got friend-zoned a few times because of this, which hasn’t happened in a while (but was very funny to see).

I needed to get some edge back. So I decided to, well, become a bit of a prick again. And now that I consciously did so, from the ground up, I clearly see why dickish behavior works (and when and how it doesn’t).

If You’re a Male Virgin, Should You Tell Her or Not?


male virgin
It sucks to be a male virgin in our society. But here’s the $10,000 question: should you tell her you’re a virgin, or not? (Answer: probably not).

A reader writes in to ask whether to discuss your virginity with a girl you like:

Hello,

Been a reader of this site for many years and, suffice to say, this site has really changed my life. I’ve gained confidence, I have developed a strong social network of friends, but, ironically, I have still never slept with a girl or been in a single relationship. I’m still young (20; I started reading when I was 15 or 16), I know, but the concept of male virginity scares me. I was wondering if you guys could touch on the subject, mainly:

(1) Does male virginity matter to woman?

(1a) Regardless of the answer, how does one carry oneself, how does one sell oneself?

(2) If you could talk about male virginity in general, and what it means for us, as men, today.

(2a) This could be, interestingly enough, tied in to modern gender roles, i.e., what it means to be a man in today’s Western society.

Also, just a little background: I’m currently serving in the military (in Israel), and thus it has become very hard to meet new women, and I, and the women I meet, are often swamped for time.

Was hoping you could also do a short piece on meeting women when you serve in the armed forces?

Thanks in advance,
Jonathan

This is a question we get often enough on Girls Chase.

So, let’s answer it.

When Does ‘No’ Actually Mean ‘No’?


no means no
When does no mean no? As the lines of consent increasingly blur, today’s men find themselves caught in a sexual Catch-22.


You’re somewhere private with a girl... kissing, caressing, running hands on one another’s bodies. And then you go to lift her shirt up.

“No,” she says.

It’s not a firm ‘no’. It’s more of an “I’m not quite ready” no. Or so you think.

But... Well, you might be wrong. You’re not quite sure.

You don’t want to be that guy who pushes her too far and makes her do something she doesn’t want to.

She isn’t a child, of course. She’s an adult like you. She has agency; her choices are hers.

Yet you want to be a force for good... not regret.

On top of this, you’re terrified of a girl crying rape... You realize 43,000 men have false allegations of rape made against them in the U.S. every year. Most of those cases get thrown out, but often only after tens of thousands in legal fees.

It’s the Salem witch-hunt of the 2010s. And you do not want to be the accused yelling “More weight.” You don’t want your life cindered for nothing.

Yet sex resistance is part and parcel to sex with American girls. If you have intercourse in America, you will encounter this. It is what girls from here do.

So what exactly should you do? And when does ‘no’ actually mean ‘no’?

Why You Always Date the Wrong Person


There are two types of people in the world, romantically-speaking:

  • Those who always date the right person, and
  • Those who always date the wrong person

The people who always date the right person are fairly consistently happy, contented, and have wonderful views of the opposite sex. They think dating is grand, and they’re still friends with their exes. Or at least they think warmly of them.

The people who always date the wrong person are fairly consistently ticked off, resentful, or disappointed, and often have scathing views of the opposite sex. They think dating is a grind, and they’re confused and unhappy, or even mortal enemies with their exes... when they’re not trying to get their exes back again, that is.

date the wrong person

This article is about why people fall into one of these camps or the other: why some people always date the right person, and why others always date the wrong one.

Make a Girl Chase Until She’s Hooked, Ripe, and Ready


make a girl chaseSeveral caveats about this article:

  1. This is reasonably advanced game. Don’t do it just yet if you’re new

  2. This is not ‘all the time’ game. It should not be your staple or go-to method

  3. I don’t advise you use it with girls you’re really into; it probably won’t work

Okay, so, this is a way to make a girl chase I generally call “putting her on the hook.” It’s where she’s hooked, she wants to see you, she’s excited to see you, and then you just... leave her there.

But not too long. Not long enough for attraction to expire or escalation windows to close. Thus, why it’s fairly advanced: you must be able to gauge where she’s at emotionally to use this style.

Then, once she’s ‘ripe’, you reel her in for a very straightforward date where you don’t really need to do anything more than kick back, hang out, and hook up.

If that sounds pretty good to you, then read on.

Quit Letting Girls Off the Hook So Much


I’ve seen a sickness in men, and it is chucking out validation like bread at the duck pond.

Here, I’ll show you what I mean.

Let’s say you compliment a girl, and she refuses it. Like so:

You: Your hair is spectacular.

Her: Oh, actually I haven’t even combed it today, haha.

What do you say next?

If you’re like most guys, you let girls off the hook with something along the lines of:

You: Well you can’t even tell. It looks awesome.

letting girls off the hook

Or, let’s say you text a girl, ask her out, yet she declines (in a nice way). Like:

You: Andie, let’s go to this wine tasting they’re having Thursday night!

Her: Oh no, I sooo want to go, but my parents are in town this week! I have to spend time with them!

How do you respond? If you’re like most guys, it’s something like:

You: Oh man, well, I’ll miss you, but have fun with your parents!

Do you sense anything slightly wrong with these responses?

Is there an almost indecipherable air of excess ‘niceness’ in them?

That excess niceness you’re picking up on is validation – and letting her off the hook.

What Makes Winter a Tougher Time to Meet Girls


Hi there everyone. I hope you are all doing great. This post is about seasonal differences in pick up. I have mentioned in earlier posts (especially in the one about the 5 factors of successful pick up) that things such as HER mood and YOUR mood play a drastic role in seduction.

meet girls winter

If her mood is right, and she is feeling all happy and horny, getting laid will be way easier than if she isn’t really feeling it that day. Here are some examples of mental states she can be in where she will feel more open to having sex with you:

  • Horny (duh)

  • Open to meeting new people

  • Adventurous

Now, on the other hand, consider those more negative states – you will see that pulling off a lay will become much harder in these circumstances.

  • She’s on her period

  • She feels tired

  • She is pissed off

Similarly, your chances of getting laid will increase if you are feeling great – and there are many reasons for that:

  • You will have a stronger presence: i.e., everything you do will come across as more powerful, and you will get away with more (even when you are less calibrated)

  • You can become more ballsy: which helps, because many times we men sometimes lack the balls to do what has to be done

  • You will have more momentum and more drive: which will help you create more opportunities (by for example approaching more women)

Where I am currently living right now, in Scandinavia, winter has taken over. You might be from a different part of the world, where you never see any snow, never experience the eternal darkness and cold – if you live in such place, this post might not be for you, and honestly, I envy you for that.

Want Results Picking Up? You Need Quantity AND Quality


Does putting in the time to go out and practice picking up women guarantee you are going to get good? Not necessarily. Many can spend years upon years trying to further their seduction skills only to find they are doing nothing but spinning their wheels.

quality and quantity pick up

I find the saddest recurring theme among the seduction community is that of someone putting in the time but not making headway even years into this. I have witnessed strangers, acquaintances, and friends alike unable to puncture whatever ceiling they have hit; only able to get a certain level of girl or reaction after thousands of hours of working on this skill-set. It is absolutely heartbreaking to see this repeated over and over. So I am dedicating this post to helping those of you who find yourself stuck and helping you onto a new paradigm of what is possible.

15 Signs a Girl Will Waste Your Time


girl wastes timeI see a lot of guys starting out who devote themselves to trying to hook up with girls who are, to a more experienced eye, clearly just bad leads: they’re women who are willing to continue to hang around a guy, and continue to let him hope he has a chance with them (whether because they want the attention, or because he is too blinded by hope to pay attention to the clear signals they’re sending him).

The sad thing about distractions like this is that a girl like this will literally waste your time – you could be off meeting women who legitimately like you and find you attractive (and would very much like a roll in the hay with you), but instead you squander your entire outing on a woman who, for all practical purposes, really presents very little value in exchange for the time you spend on her.

Now, it’s all well and good for you to make female friends and get to know women better, and, particularly as a beginner-to-intermediate, you should absolutely be doing this (in particular, make friends with the demographics of women you’d most like to date, so you can empathize with and relate to these sorts of women more easily).

However, one thing you should not be doing is confusing women who have no intention of shacking up with you for women worth your persistence and sticking around for.

That in mind, here are fifteen (15) signs a girl will waste your time... and that you should probably cut bait and move onto the next girl.

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