Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

Should You Really Worry About Female State Control and Social Frame?

Alek Rolstad's picture

female state control and social frame
All this stuff about Female State Control and Social Frame is great and very useful. But how much do you really need to focus on it in your seductions?

After many posts on female state control (FSC) and social frame, it may seem like we are getting a bit too far down the rabbit hole. Some of you may be asking yourselves, “Do I need all this?”

Here are the articles written on the subject so far:

  1. Spell Broken: Big Mistakes That Shred Conversation (by Chase from 2011)
  2. Female State Control (FSC): Theoretical Causes and Effects
  3. Female State Control (FSC): Preemptive Measures
  4. How to Get Somewhere with a Girl: The Floors and Ceilings Method (by Chase)  
  5. Female State Control (FSC): Social Frame and Comfort
  6. Female State Control Vaccines: Social Frame
  7. The Social Dynamics of Female State Control in Pickup
  8. Female State Control Vaccines: Rapport and Fractionation
  9. Female State Control Vaccines: Investment
  10. How to Take Women Home Without Having the Right Social Frame
  11. Social Acceptability and Sexual Acceptability in Dating (by Chase)
  12. How Too Much High Value Can Trigger Female State Control
  13. Female State Control: More Causes and Solutions
  14. Female State Management and Social Frame: The Big Picture

Do you really need this complex info, all these fine-tuned techniques?

The quick answer is: some of it, sure. We’re covering a broad arsenal. Sometimes you need a few elements; sometimes you need everything.

Remember there is always another woman nearby who is easier. She may be equally nice and equally hot.

But sometimes you end up going all pickup nerdy; you want perfection. You want to have a high meet-to-lay ratio.

To some, this discussion about FSC and social frame may seem overly complicated. If it’s so important, is this another area you must spend tons of time to learn about, practicing the techniques to prevent and counter FSC? It could seem a bit demotivating to some, and it may make pickup and seduction seem even harder than it already is.

This is the question I would like to answer in this post. Do you need all this, and if so, when? I will also mention when you shouldn’t focus on this.

Lastly, I will offer a simplified guide for intermediates, newbies, and for those times when you have low momentum and are not performing as well as you usually do.

Signs She Likes You: Puts Her Phone Down or Away

Chase Amante's picture
she puts her phone down
In a world where everyone’s noses are glued to their phones, a woman lowering her phone around you can be a telling sign she likes you.

Ever since smart phones became ubiquitous, guys on seduction forums have had a selection of similar questions/complaints:

  • "Girls are too absorbed in their phones to approach!"
  • "How do I get girls to take their head phones out?"
  • "I can't get approach invitations anymore, women don't even look up now!"

Several nights ago I walked down the street and marveled to myself at how ubiquitous it was: men and women of all ages, young and old alike, totally entranced by their smart phones. Smart phones aren't some 'young hip thing' that all the kids are on and the old folks haven't clued into. Everyone is.

Every solo person I passed on the street had his nose glued to a phone, or, in a few cases, didn't, but was talking to someone via earphones or a Bluetooth headset instead.

Even in some of the groups I passed, some or all of the people would have their phones out in front of them as they talked and laughed to friends.

That might seem like a major approach inhibitor if you came up in the old days where people were more, shall we say, present in their environment. How can you approach a girl when she's so occupied already?

I actually quite like the global smart phone addiction, for two reasons:

  1. It's a lot lower pressure to approach anywhere people have their phones out now (which is pretty much anywhere other than a dance floor these days), because bystanders are far more absorbed in their own cell phone adventures and pay even less attention to you

  2. You will find out pretty quick if she is going to be willing to ditch her phone to talk to you, or not. Which is about as big an obvious proceed/don't proceed sign as you're going to get (this makes it simpler to weed out the uninterested gals, who quickly return to their phones, from the interested ones, who zero in on you, or at least linger away from their phones)

However, I want to highlight one specific quirk of behavior you'll see with women on phones when they like you.

This is a sign a girl likes you that is pretty obvious once you're aware of it. You've likely seen it a bunch already, and are subconsciously aware of it. Well, now we're going to make it conscious, so you can act on it as soon as you see it.

That sign is that when she's awaiting your approach or engagement, she will put her phone down or sometimes may (gasp) put it away.

13 Blatant Signs Your Girlfriend Is Cheating

Tony Depp's picture

is she cheating
Is she cheating on you? When a girl is cheating, there will be signs. But to avoid making matters worse, you must not approach the question with an insecure mindset.

Have you ever looked for signs that your girlfriend is cheating on you?

I hope this hasn’t happened. But if it has, this article will help you notice some signals that indicate she’s cheating.

First, you need to make the distinction between insecurity and intuition. The two can be mistaken.

How to Seed Dates and Pulls Back Home

Chase Amante's picture
seed a date
It's easier to get a girl to agree to a date or to go to your place if what you suggest feels familiar to her. But how do you trigger that feeling of familiarity? By seeding your suggestion first.

Recently I spoke with a friend who's back in the field after some time off, trying to shake off the rust. He's gone on a lot of dates but had trouble closing the deal with girls. And he mentioned his usual process for getting alone with a woman right now.

What he's doing, typically, is taking girls on a date, then later going for a walk with them, only to 'just happen' to end up right outside his building. He'll then invite them up.

Except most of the time they balk. Other times they'll go up with him, but resist kissing, and leave soon after he kisses them or tries to. He started to wonder if he might not be asking women to make too big a decision ("Go into this guy's place and get intimate, yes or no?") on the spot.

So I reminded him about seeding.

Seeding is a tool you can use to make it easier to get women onto dates and back to your place (or you to theirs).

It works by making women feel 'familiar' with the thing you want to propose, by introducing it earlier, before the decision point. Seeding a request or invite before you make it removes the 'on the spot' feeling when you do propose something, so a woman does not feel as if she suddenly must decide whether or not to do something then and there.

If you know how to seed dates and pulls with women, and you seed often, you'll discover let-downs like my friend has, where you bring a woman by your place and invite her up, only to run into a 'no', largely evaporate. Instead you get girls to agree before you even start on your way, and find they're bought-in by the time you arrive.

Male vs. Female Mating Motivations Laid Bare

Chase Amante's picture
female mating motivations
You might think men and women approach mating in similar ways. And on some aspects they do. On others, they're very different.

We live in a world where we're constantly told men and women are interchangeable and that men's wants are women's wants and women's wants are men's. In some cases for some things this is true... but in many cases and for many things it isn't.

The trouble this error-filled belief system can lead to is multi-layered. If you have a girlfriend, a female friend, a friend-with-benefits, or wife you think is "just like you" whom you think thinks about things "just like I do" and whom you believe wants "all the same things I do", you'll be a lot more open to and uncritical toward her suggestions. That's fine for things where there is no conflict of interest between your and her life and mating motivations.

Where there is conflict, however, her positions may quickly mislead you... without you, if you hold this "men and women are basically the same and largely interchangeable" philosophy, even fully realizing you've allowed yourself to be misled.

It's crucial for your power and sanity as a man to realize that while a good woman's advice can often be prudent, it isn't always... and that there are differences between male and female motivations, and you must always keep these in mind.

You need to know when sex differences enter into play. And you need to be wary of when the counsel you receive may be biased against what is truly in your interests due to competing sexual interests.

Female State Management and Social Frame: The Big Picture

Alek Rolstad's picture

female state control

Hey, guys. Welcome back!

Here’s my final article on Female State Control (FSC), and to some extent, social frame. I will try to tie it all together and give you the big picture.

In doing so, I will refer to posts from our beloved Chase. He has written amazing posts that I enjoyed reading on floors and ceilings as well as acceptability, all closely related to FSC and social frame.

I will also mention an older post from Chase on state crashes, troughs, and cresting that is extremely relevant to this discussion.

One word of caution: my mention of these posts will be my interpretations of these posts. After numerous email exchanges with Chase on the subject, it seems like I understood his points quite well.

This article is packed with details and will be a dense post to some. It’s recommended for more advanced readers. Make sure you are rested and caffeinated before reading. Reading twice to understand it all is advised.

6 Big Secrets to Being ‘Fearless’ as a Man

Tony Depp's picture

how to be fearless
Fear can be useful to avoid being eaten by lions. But when it comes to approaching women and living life to its fullest, you must learn how to be fearless.

Imagine how awesome your life would be if you knew how to be fearless. You could do anything. You’d be full beast mode.

I have a friend. Let’s call him Jim. Jim’s a writer. He's like me but not as good looking. He always wanted to write the next American classic. He wanted to be the next Bukowski, Jack London, or Hemingway.

Whenever I’d return from a trip to some foreign country, like Vietnam, Ukraine, or Mexico, I’d invite him to come on my next trip with me. He’d say, “Tony, isn’t it dangerous there? I prefer a nice, safe Alaskan cruise. You should try a cruise.”

When I went camping with him, all he wanted to do was sit around, drinking and sketching pictures of the campfire. I wanted to trek into the forest and climb the nearest mountain. “Oh, Tony, but there are bears and stuff. We could get lost.”

He is also obsessed with mainstream media and believes that right-wing Nazis are taking over the world again. He lives in a constant state of fear. Every decision has some terrible consequence. In this perpetual state of paranoia, nothing truly inspirational happens, nothing random, adventurous, or worthy of retelling.

He never wrote his great American novel because he never had any great American experiences. He never fought real Nazis, or traveled to Africa, or made love to exotic women. Because he had no idea how to be fearless as a man, he couldn’t live a life adventurous enough to write a book.

He fears death. And it’s the fear of death that keeps us from living.

I told him that, and we haven’t been friends since.

Depression and Dating: Get Laid Even If You're Depressed (Video)

Hector Castillo's picture

I deal with bipolar episodes. One minute I’m on top of the world and have more confidence, testosterone, and optimism than ANYONE... then the next minute, I’m devising a thousand different ways I could off myself and rationalizing why I’m the greatest piece of shit that has ever existed.

And my depressive episodes DEFINITELY impact my dating life. Of course they do.

But you can still find success. Hell, you can even USE your depression to your advantage.

This video is for those who aren’t feeling okay, those who rarely feel okay, and anyone who will ever at some point NOT feel okay... which is everyone.

So here’s how to navigate the dating world when you’re not feeling your best.

Women with Small Dating Pools

Chase Amante's picture

dating poolOne of the things that dawns on you after years of cold approaching is that some women are much easier to date and bed than other women are. Further, it dawns on you that the factors that make a woman easier to date and bed are not always ones obvious to guys who don't approach a lot of women.

You learn counterintuitive truths like that very beautiful women are nicer and friendlier to strangers than mediocre-looking women are. Or that the most physically attractive women usually try to blend in more, while the most eye-catching women tend to be lower down on the looks scale but are far more deliberately flashy. You learn it's usually better to move faster than it is to wait around until some girl is 'ready' to date you (which, if it doesn't happen fast, most likely won't ever happen). You discover women have more respect for men who challenge them and ask them for favors than they do for men who go out of their ways to do favors for them.

You learn to look for signs a woman wants you to approach, as well as for signs you should stay away from her. You learn to tell how a girl shows interest in you and which women want you for sex.

Another thing you figure out, sooner or later, is how important the size of a woman's dating pool is to the odds you date or sleep with her.

Female State Control: More Causes and Solutions

Alek Rolstad's picture

female state control
In our ongoing exploration of Female State Control (FSC), we’ve identified several causes and solutions. But wait, there’s more! Let’s fill in those missing pieces.

Welcome back! This is a continuation of our discussion on Female State Control (FSC). If you'd like to catch up, here are the articles to date:

  1. Female State Control (FSC): Theoretical Causes and Effects
  2. Female State Control (FSC): Preemptive Measures
  3. Female State Control (FSC): Social Frame and Comfort
  4. Female State Control Vaccines: Social Frame
  5. The Social Dynamics of Female State Control in Pickup
  6. Female State Control Vaccines: Rapport and Fractionation
  7. Female State Control Vaccines: Investment
  8. How to Take Women Home Without Having the Right Social Frame
  9. Social Acceptability and Sexual Acceptability in Dating
  10. How Too Much High Value Can Trigger Female State Control

Last week, we mentioned other social factors that can trigger Female State Control that are not related to a lack of social frame. Today we will discuss other reasons why women may hold themselves back and control their state when they are getting aroused by you.

If you’ve been tagging along up until now, you probably know that FSC and social frame are subjects I’ve discussed a lot lately. But for those of you who are new to our discussion, FSC is the phenomenon of women controlling their state: holding back, turning cold, and ejecting when they get stimulated/aroused by a guy. It can happen with a guy she doesn't consider socially acceptable to hook up with (if her friends are likely to find out, for example).

You can view this post as an overview covering everything I haven’t had a chance to mention in my earlier posts on FSC. Many points listed here may be small; however, they are still significant. I will not discuss rare and uncommon situations but instead will look at common interactions that I believe many of you will face or have faced before.

As I cover these points, I’ll do my best to present reliable solutions to the problems. As we will see, not every issue covered will have an answer (and you may not always want to fix it, especially if the problem is significant). However, I will try to compensate with some discussion and analysis.