There is a strange phenomenon in urban places. Double standards come under attack.
Not all double standards, mind you. But certain ones.
This is one of the BIGGEST weaknesses for most guys.
Over and over and over again I get screenshots from guys who text like absolute idiots.
And it makes sense, because texting is COMPLETELY different from talking to women in real life.
The rules change with text game because you're unable to use many of the tools you have when talking with a woman face to face.
So how must you do things differently to be successful with texting?
Watch!
Some types of flakes are easier to deal with than others. Let’s talk about the tough ones, like when she’s not that into you or she’s testing you to expose weakness.
As a guy, you’ve likely experienced this scenario: you get excited about seeing a girl who agrees to go on a date but end up feeling frustrated when she flakes on you. It makes the process of getting her out again much more complicated. A girl flaking on a date might seem like a big deal, but it shouldn’t be.
In Part 1 of this series, we covered how to recover from a flake when “life” happens and interferes with her plans. Usually, it’s simply a matter of comfortably rescheduling the date.
However, sometimes it’s not so simple.
As mentioned in Part 1, girls flake for one of three reasons:
Part 1 covered the first reason. Now we’ll cover the other two. You’ll learn what to do when she’s not interested enough and how to react when she tests you.
Unfortunately, these two situations are a bit more complicated. They indicate that the girl wasn’t interested enough or you made mistakes early on. Any mistake a guy makes will drop a girl’s attraction for him. Most of all, if he didn’t create enough attraction when meeting her, his options are limited.
Some guys are naturally good at texting and can create attraction through messaging. If you’re one of them, that’s a great skill to use in flake management. I’m not one of these guys, so I can’t comment much on what to do there.
Other times a girl will sense something is “off” about you, and will instead test you to see what you’ll do and how you’ll react. This is also not an optimal situation, usually surfacing because a guy did something wrong.
So let's talk about solutions.
I just talked to Alek about his neat new series on Female State Control. If you haven't read it yet, check it out (see the link).
When we talked about that, it brought up a way of thinking about how to get somewhere with a girl I've long had, but not discussed much. I've talked about it here and there, especially with deep diving and connection stuff. It's a sort of basic understanding of how progress with women works.
This understanding is what we might call 'The Floors and Ceilings Method'.
This method is very slightly complicated to understand. But not much. And once you have it, it gives you another dimension to understand male-female courtships with.
The method isn't limited to seduction. It also works with sales. It works with new friendship formation. Any kind of new relationship formation, especially where you want to get someone to do something, uses it. We'll focus on using it with women you like in this article, but it applies everywhere.
This is a simple method. I'll explain how it works, and you'll soon see how it applies to so many things.
If you like sex but don’t want a relationship, booty calling is the way to go. But getting and keeping a booty call with minimal pain and drama requires finesse.
Booty calling is a fun-filled lifestyle choice that any man can go for. However, if you want that sweet booty ordered to your door like pizza, you’ll want to communicate this to your woman, or women, without causing too much drama or crushed feelings.
You’ll need a contract.
Failure to set up a proper booty call contract can result in broken-up, hurt women and undesired drama.
I’ve had plenty of casual sex partners. Usually they’re girls who already have boyfriends or husbands and didn’t want to leave their relationships but still desired a little excitement or romance. Or they were too busy with work or school to have a long-term relationship (LTR). Some just wanted no-strings-attached sex with a discreet partner.
Some booty calling meets both the man’s and the woman’s needs, but most have lopsided attraction dynamics. The female will sleep with the male, and give him his “space” in the vain hope that once he realizes how amazing she is, it will turn into a more stable and monogamous “real” relationship.
Some women will sleep with you then quickly realize they can do better and move on. This isn’t real booty calling, as it’s generally the man’s fault for not having the characteristics she desires in a mate. For example, you’re a broke, needy, man-boy with no game who just happened to get lucky.
But for the rest, it’s usually just a player getting as much ass from as many women as possible without handing over his freedom. After all, freedom is a precious commodity.
Yes, some women just want to bang, but the vast majority would prefer a committed relationship with one special guy. Even if they’re willing to share him for a short trial period to seduce the man into monogamy, thus being a booty call.
If you’re trying to go booty calling, either become the master of stringing girls along, or learn how to communicate what exactly it is you desire. Hell truly hath no fury like that of a woman scorned — meaning hurt women can do terrible things to your life — so it’s best to avoid that. Be as honest as possible about your desires and intentions with her. Women being “played” has resulted in more scratched paint jobs, smashed PlayStations, and false rape accusations than necessary.
Usually when you meet a girl, you don't want to leave her. If you leave her, she might leave herself! Some other guy might dash in to steal her away. Her emotions toward you may cool. There's no telling what could happen.
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So, you will tend to be with her straight through. Straight to the point you take her contact info, then say farewell. Or straight to the point you invite her home (then take her there).
Once she's home with you, you'll be at her side the whole time too. You want her to get comfortable with you, after all. She can't get comfortable with you when you're not there.
Thus, this tactic might seem a smidge counterintuitive.
Yet if you want to solidify her commitment to you, and get her to value you more, this one'll do that.
And all you have to do to use it is (at the proper moment) leave her alone for two (2) minutes.
The ability to set frames and get women to qualify to them is a powerful seduction tool. Here are 3 frame control techniques to accomplish just that.
When you become a great conversationalist, the women you meet consistently view you as exciting and interesting to talk to. You’ll have little to no trouble reaching the hook point with the gorgeous girls you’d like to take to bed. And since most men aren’t willing to put in the work to master the art of conversation, you will stand out.
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Another advantage of maximizing your conversation skills is attaining the intuitive ability to set strong frames in your seductions. You won’t miss a beat or even pause to think about what you’re going to say next. Once you become a great conversationalist, you’ll find that sexually persuasive frames – like frames to accelerate a progression toward intimacy – will roll off your tongue effortlessly.
Setting the right kinds of frames is an essential part of mastering the art of seductive conversation.
In this article, we’ll discuss three very persuasive and versatile frame control techniques you can add to your arsenal. Read on, and you can start using them today to give your seductions an extra layer of persuasive power!
There are two sides to learning.
On the one hand, there's learning something new. This side is important. You need to learn new strategies to get what you want. You need new techniques. You must give yourself new mindsets, new behaviors, and new mental models. All this is vital.
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There's another side though that's a lot more overlooked. This side is in many ways even more important than the first side (learning), because without it, the first side is tough or impossible. This second side is that of unlearning. It is the art of deprogramming.
Everyone knows when a cult member makes it out of a cult, he has to go through a long period of deprogramming. This is worst for children raised within that cult, where the cult is all they've ever known. People raised in a religion who reject that religion go through it. People raised outside religion who later embrace it go through it too. The unlearning -- the deprogramming -- is as crucial as and in many ways more crucial than the learning. Until a man deprograms himself of old beliefs, he doesn't have the room to take on much in the way of new ones.
Deprogramming lies at the heart of switching from an ineffective way of trying to get what you want to an effective way.
Yet, sometimes, some men are wholly resistant to deprogramming.
And when you can't deprogram a man, you can't reprogram him either.
Which is bad for all sorts of reasons, if his old program is not a good, useful, helpful one for him.
Being the center of attention is an amazing feeling. Everyone enjoys it, even if they don’t want to admit it.
It feels good for everyone to be paying attention to you and to laugh, smile, and stare at your performance as a social being.
I don’t care how introverted you are or how “too cool for groups” you are – you love attention. We all do.
So this is how you GET the spotlight and how you USE it.
It is a tool like everything.
So let’s learn how to use this tool.
In our continuing study of Female State Control, we consider methods to avoid it entirely, including better calibration and focusing more on frame control than arousal.
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1. The Progress Toward Solutions to FSC
2. The Problems with Buyer's Temperature
3. The Weakness of Emotional Spikes
4. Slowing Down to Move Faster?
Hey, guys. Welcome back.
In my previous post, I discussed a new and different form of resistance that we labeled Female State Control (FSC). This form of resistance is very common, different from the other more well-known resistance type called anti-slut defense or ASD. The difference is that ASD deals with her defense mechanism against slut-shaming and other negative social consequences related to female promiscuity.
FSC is a biological mechanism that helps women make rational choices about sex partners. Women tend to get easily carried away in their emotions, and that is usually beneficial to their purpose of nurturing and also grants them a higher emotional intelligence (EQ) than men. Strong emotions can help her make good decisions (emotions hindering rational decision-making is not always true; often, it is quite the opposite). However, when emotions seem to be too strong (too much of the good stuff), there is a potential risk of her getting carried away, hence increasing the chance of making an irrational choice.
We must understand that women are instinctively more risk-averse than men, partly because of the higher risks they may experience during pregnancy. Therefore, it is imperative that women are more selective than men when it comes to choosing a mate.
So, whenever a woman is getting carried away, she has an underlying conscious voice that forces her to pull herself out of situations where she can get carried away, by:
These actions allow her to gain control of her emotions and make a rational choice. This is FSC.
