How to Tell if a Girl is Horny Without Her Having to Tell You | Girls Chase

How to Tell if a Girl is Horny Without Her Having to Tell You

how to tell if a girl is hornyOne of the things that it seems like a lot of guys have difficulty realizing is when women actually want them.

Chances are, you've heard some of the conventional ways on figuring out if a girl is horny. Some of them are:

  • Check her heart rate
  • Check her breathing rate -- the faster she's breathing, the more excited
  • Check her pupil dilation
  • Check her vaginal dilation or how lubricated she is... down there

Great stuff if you're an M.D. And you've got your stethoscope handy (or a pair of rubber gloves).

But how do you figure that out when you're standing across the room from a girl, or you're deep in conversation with her? Not exactly the right time for a lubrication check.

One of the most underrated skills for the man interested in getting together with women is the ability to quickly identify the women who are looking for the same thing that he is. This is a skill called "targeting," and it's one I've put a fair amount of work into cultivating in myself.

One of the most important aspects of targeting, it turns out, is figuring out how to tell if a girl is horny.

Chase AmanteAbout the Author: Chase Amante

Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone. So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating. After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website. He will teach you everything he knows about girls in one single program in his Mastery Package.

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Comments

Sam's picture

Hey Chase,

It's been a long time since I have read your blog (have been super busy), and all I wanted to comment on this article was; it's BANG ON!

Massive massive realisation. Everything just makes sense now and I'm pretty sure this goes for a lot of guys. I'm quite happy to say there are a few epiphanies I have had when reading your blog so please continue writing your articles.

Please don't be mean that I have visited it in a while. ;)

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Howdy Sam,

Don't worry brother, I'll try not to get too aloof over it ;)

Appreciate the praise and feedback, man. Glad to hear that you're able to drop back by and still find stuff you like on here!

Cheers,
Chase

Daniel's picture

Chase, thanks for this awesome post, I´ve been reading your blog for quite a time, and it helped me a lot from being better with people to being better with women.

So, there is a girl in my classroom, I kinda didn`t pay her a lot of attention, but always found her very atractive, but suddenly I noticed her stealing me glances and often looking at me (surprisingly, after putting a lot of effort for being more sexy and more social, all learned in your blog), but when I sit near to talk with her she acts like, well... like a total b*

she treats me like I were the dumbest man in earth, always getting very angry for anything I do, always complaining and saying how stupid and idiot I am. but b*-ing aside I notice her posture always being very direct, open, pointed toward me, sometimes, bumping into me when were near, and with her body always facing me, even when I switch from my desk to another one, her walls like you said in another post, totally down.

I would like to get more intimate with her, but man! she is hard to deal with. I talk to her always like im teasing her and all being sexy and edgy, because from what I can tell is the only kind of conversation she likes with me. but I don`t know if this is leading me anywhere! I can`t talk to her, screen, qualify etc... looks like were always fighting! we are like a couple of 7 years old kids where kissing would be disgusting and sex would be never an option. but heck, I know I want her, and I know she wants something too...

there is a way I can make this work? I`ve read several articles of yours but she seems very different from all situations I faced until now, I don`t know if she likes me, but she really likes complaining about me TO ME! there is something I`m doing wrong, or is this going the right way and I´m not seeing it?

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Hey Daniel,

First off, super cool that you've made so many improvements in yourself off of stuff from the blog! That's rewarding for me to hear.

Secondly, this girl sounds like a TON of fun! I personally love fiery girls, and the first piece of advice I can give you on them is that they completely melt for a guy who doesn't fold like a wet noodle when they give him a hard time... unlike most of the guys they meet.

What you're probably going to need to do with this gal is dial up the persistence. You'll have to start asking her out, routinely, in relatively creative ways. Don't make too big a deal out of it; don't plan it out and make yourself nervous. Just banter with her, and the next time she gets a particularly sharp zinger in on you, laugh pretty hard, and tell her you're going to buy her an ice cream -- your treat.

She'll probably say "no."

So then, you go and banter with her the next day. Same old, same old.

The day after that, more banter. Then you say, "Everyone in this damn classroom thinks we're an old married couple. Are you going to let me take you to get a cup of coffee?"

And she may say "no" again.

More banter the next day.

The day after that, more banter, then you ask her out again. "Hey, really awesome event going on today -- you and me, waffle house, 3 PM. You'll be there, right?"

Just keep mixing it up. One day off, one day on, for inviting her out. Each invite out should be a different, relatively chill place, asked in a slightly different way.

"We're getting a Jamba Juice today after class. I don't know if anyone told you that yet."

"Your mom called last night. She said she wants you to go out with me, and you're not allowed home again until you do."

"I read this article in the newspaper today. It said 'Daniel and Jen have an awesome date out on a park bench. Jen falls utterly in love, while Daniel plays it cool.' I think it was like tomorrow's newspaper or something, sent one day into the past."

Look at it as fun and just make it part of the banter. Ask her out every other day until she cracks and says "yes." If it takes two months, just keep at it, and I bet you get her eventually ;)

Cheers brother,
Chase

shaveen's picture

Hey great article

Krelian's picture

One thing you forgot to mention, Chase, is that after you know and understand this, you are invincible ! So many guys lose confidence when a girl is mean to them, they think the girl is not interested and don't try to progress further.

But knowing this, you're a fucking champ now =) You won't lose confidence as much, and you know the best part ? EVEN girls that wouldn't want you at first might become interested after seeing their "bitch mode" does nothing to you.

Or maybe not, but then again, in the end, you had fun trying :)

Very very good post, i'm new to your blog but i LOVE it already.

Cheers from Montreal !

The Lightning Weasel's picture

This is an awesome post man. It is hard to find advice that is geared towards guys who already have a certain level of proficiency. I think this falls into that category; it falls into the realm of taking a girl to bed once you've already dealt with attraction. I just found the blog man I think I found it through Google. I will certainly be coming back.

Weasel

MichaelD's picture

This is an excellent post Chase...
Just one thing that's gotten my mind...what about when a woman is having her menstrual period and she is mean/bitchy as a result? Is there a way to differentiate/spot this...

Female Speaking's picture

Dear MichaelD,

As a girl, I can tell you that most women who become 'mean' on their periods (and even those who don't) are usually super horny. If you can see past the meanness and later the blood, you will be with a woman whose hormones are raging (hence the horniness) and for whom sex will feel exceptional (in part due to aforementioned hormones, but also because a woman's cervix naturally opens up wider, at all times, and more lube is being produced).*

P.S. Chase, I've read a few of your posts and have been amazed at how accurate they are. Sometimes I think you know me better than I do. Excellent work, and I think everyone would be much better off if they were to read and follow your posts. Amen amen

*Careful, this is not true for all women; however, you probably won't meet those for whom it is not true.

Anonymous's picture

I was with my girl today and noticed a few things. Eyes, breathing, and the way she was acting... The thing that sucks about this is she waits till marriage, anyway I can get around this?

Rafael's picture

I know that kind of girl too and its hard man! Hold on...!?

Anonymous's picture

Her being horny means nothing if she's not willing to have sex with you. And her waiting until marriage means she's not, so don't pressure her.

Anonymous's picture

I like this mindset of seeing everything the girls does as being sexually frustrated. I think guys who are good looking/fit automatically do this when around women.

Jessicaellen's picture

I hate to admit due to the fact that IM a female but.... He's actually right. There's the bitches when they don't get laid and then there's the kittens. But I'm tellin you guys... Look for the kittens first because her personality reflects the way horniness makes her act. Say one of you guys are like all lovey dovey and crap and really start to like the girl..... Well just better hope you can manage to supply her with enough dick. :)
Oh and btw I'm one of those kittens that turns into a bitch after so long that you were talkin about Mr.Chase. Lol

Anonymous's picture

Nice! CHEERS! Huge Help hehehe... thanks a lot!

Anonymous's picture

Hi! So, I met this girl and at first we were both shy when we spoke to each other. Then one day we started texting and it got a little hot...if you know what I mean ;) So we didnt text for another week or so but we would see each other about once a week. After a week or two we texted again and this time it got really HOT! We talked about sex positions and what not. But...this is why Im writing you, before it got all HOT, she made a reply about me perhaps being bad in bed, then I said that i wasn't and that i can last forever. Then she said oh thats good. I was about to text her something very sexual, and this would have been my first time bringing it up. So i text her: i was about to tell you something but you would hate me if i told you. She texted back: "tell me but dont make my panties wet"! In my mind i was like WTF! that is HOT! I didnt reply back to it, i acted like i didnt receive it, but i made a sexual reference and thats when things got really HOT. We talked about fav positions, and what ifs about us hanging out and having drinks. I ask you, is this girl ready to have sex with me!? Oh yeah, she is married, 8 or 9 years and no kids. Please help me out!

Anonymous's picture

This is not true. Women have emotions, you know. We legitimately get angry sometimes. It has nothing to do with being horny.

Nicole's picture

I hate to admit this, because I am a female, but, you certainly are right, Chase. Kittens, lionesses, yada yada yada. There's also the fact that when a girl is horny, her voice changes, and she starts teasing. And yes, when a kitten doesn't get enough of what she wants, she turns into a complete, and utter, bitch. No doubt about that.

Anonymous's picture

First of all, amazing blog. I have read a couple of books and I read some forums as well. Good info in all, but the wealth of information found here has no comparison by far. I dunno if I can be helped or not, but this blog is eye opening. I dare to say this is the best resource for anybody trying to improve his dating life.

well, on to the question. There is this girl with whom I work. I approached her several times in the past years (3 times) to no avail. I did it wrong of course, did not even know where to take her to. I mostly do no contact with her and avoid her the best I can. Then she seemed to be trying to be nice to me, but I was cold to that.

A couple of days ago there was some reason for her to call me (job related) but instead of calling me directly, she ordered someone else do it for her. I am trying not to react to that with bitterness but it did hit me hard. I feel like a pussy for not knowing what should I do at all. What if she is actually pissed because I do not talk to her. I have my reservations with her because it seems to me she is gold digger type of girl. any comments or advice?

AussieGirl's picture

I'm in a bitchy mood right now ;)

Jake's picture

Im free ;D

Michael7778's picture

On the flip side, girls need to realise that there are plenty of guys who aren't going to play
psycotherapist for hours, trying figure out whatever game she is playing with them. Also that the mean, rude girl act will turn away the majority of guys. Doesn't matter if you're looking for a boyfriend or a one night stand, that attitude will turn most guys away.

Jack's picture

Yeah. Very valid point because guys who get turned off by that are usually psychotherapy-clueless ones who are the better ones for those horny girls to get into the sack. Real men don't play games. It's a sad irony.

Anonymous's picture

what chase is saying michael is that most of these angry women arent putting on an act there in some desperate need of a good pounding and i will be damned if i am gonna sit around and let that poor girl be angry any longer. For christ sake I am going after the angry ones first they need my help the most, it's an epidemic and any angry girl I see i am going to see it as my duty to move her quickly . Chase your website is awesome buddy and this article here is solid gold now i will actually get an even bigger grin on my face when i am dealing with an angry women cause i got the cure for that . Thanks

Anonymous's picture

Aussie girl i have the cure for your bitchiness :)

Anonymous's picture

First off, I'd like to say that I am a female who read this article out of curiosity. I came across this article on accident and decided to read it to see if guys really were able to tell when a girl wants it.
I was completely stunned to find that the article was spot on! I had never realized the connection between my moody and meaness to being sexually frustrated by a guy, but now that I hear it it makes complete sense! For example I went to a concert with an old flame and was really in the mood When suddenly he did something that should not have upset me so much on an ordinary day, made me so angry and upset we got in a huge fight over it. In hindsight, I realize it was more of the frustration of knowing nothing was going to happen between us that had me already annoyed and the little thing he did was the last straw.

Kaitlin's picture

We act bitchy and stuck up to guys who hit on us who we're not interested in. The message should be fuck off, not i'm horny. If a guy starts talking to us who we're attracted to, we'll be playful and flirtatious. This article is just delusional. if you pursue a girl who is blatantly mean to you you're barking up the wrong tree.

Anonymous's picture

its so wrong its right is what you meant Kaitlin. You know i have the cure for that bitchiness of yours:)

The Asian Casanova's picture

We've meet before from the San Diego Lair. Good to see your blog is going strong, you've always written great content.

Peace out
-Brian

Anonymous's picture

Actually, gentlemen, I am sorry to say that when a guy approaches me at the bar, club, or any other venue using "impersonal" flirting, I may find it amusing, to which I'll respond positively with a laugh or teasing (accompanied by a smile and a get out of here). Or if I find the line degrading or stupid, I will get rude. That is not a green light. That is a polite version of the finger or a censored eff off.
With personal flirtation, I may either be interested, (friendly and willing to continue the conversation), or uninterested (cold, brush offy, but unwilling to be rude about it since technically they're only talking to me).
You see, guys, if a girl likes you they'll let you know. Acting mean is middle school status. Any girl in her right mind that wants to get laid isn't going to be a bitch to a guy if she wants him anywhere near her lady cave. I think you guys saying that girls getting bitchy when you hit on them is just a way for you to rationalize a second attempt once rejected and is very stupid.

Carlos Augustine's picture

Hey Chase,

How can you tell if a girl is horny? For me it's always been her breath. There's a certain smell that's quite sweet and alluring. It's like an aphrodisiac for the sense of smell. It's a sure fire sign.

All the best,
Carlos

Trevor's picture

Chase I like the blog and all but can u help me there is this girl I have a damn crush on and she calls me "weird boy"!

Matteo's picture

last year i started talking to this girl in my class and it went well, she was out of a bad relationship and i took a chance and asked her to dinner, she said yes but everytime we went out she brought a friend it got so annoying, i also noticed she was also texting other guys too, anyway after a long time of taking her out and doing things for her i felt used, i told her that and we stopped talking and worked it out while we werent seeing eachother in the summer. so on return of school we started talking again and i really started liking her, so i kept texting her all the time and it was going good, so i took her out and she brought a friend so i brought mine, and we ended up talking in a mcdonalds sharing stories and stuff and eventually it got boring so we brought them home. so we were texting and sh said she wants to have sex in my car in the rain, i said oh ill get a big car and she said any car man as long as there is a blanket, so we go out and she ended up bringing a friend, and nothing happened so i told her i brought everything and shit and she said i was silly lool, so i tried to make some sexual talk so i was playing drums and i said ive seen the way my kit has been looking at me all week, im going to bang her sooo hard, she said good bang her hard, well and long , shes missed it, and she told me she hadnt had sex since may before. so i asked her out that night but there was nothing to do she said well what are we going to do, i said i dont know lets drive around then she said but i have to get readyyy and i said no just come and she said but i dont want to shower and everything then i just said well hurry and shower im coming then i finally picked her up, drove around with her aimlessly and didnt pull any moves, i let her drive and she went to my buddies house and told him to come down cause i guess i fucked up and didnt go for it, then we drop him off later and we end up at her house and i go to kiss her and she said sorry maybe next time you shouldnt speed while im in the car and she was smiling and i said come hereeee and she just kept resisting while smiling i even went to just go for it and she moved me away so i just hugged her and said goodbye and now she barely messsages me back and shes talking to other guys still and stuff what shouuullldddd i dooo i reallly like her and really want to fuck her to hahaha

no one's picture

sorry bro, you blew it. she thinks you're all talk. use this failure and build from it - we've all been there.

RM's picture

10/10 worked ! ahahha niceee man friend fucking niceee pure genious !

Zach day's picture

Okay so we were going out with each other for about 2 months and she
All of a sudden started being a butch to me and broke
Up with me and now she cusses at me every Time I go
To talk to her and I've told her that I'm sorry for what
Ever I did and she won't answer and so I really love her
And I did nothing wrong I know and I just really like her
And don't want to lose her what should I do?

gambetto's picture

Well, it's not true for me. I am super horny ALL the time but I'm never mean to anyone. But then again, I'm also waiting till marriage so maybe it's because I don't want to have a one-night stand of all the things in the world. I sometimes hate gossip so I may want out of there but my distraction never means I want to go home with a man. It just means I'm bored and staying out of courtesy or because it's late and I need to go home with the group instead of step out alone (I'm usually bad with directions and never have any idea where we end up after the club hopping starts). I'm pretty nice in a relationship too. I guess I get a little bit mean when I don't get enough attention. Kind of the same thing? Maybe. It's rare though. Interesting blog.

Eric Reeves's picture

Hey Gambetto (interesting handle..),

That's awesome that you have a high sex drive and are a relaxed girl; you seem like the type of girl I'd go after.

One thing that's confusing to me.. you say you're waiting for marriage? Why? I find it especially strange you've found your way here to this blog.

I assume that you also save yourself while in relationships, and even go club hopping.. Why are you holding yourself back from enjoying yourself and not enjoying what your body wants you to do?

I've had experience with girls (both religious and not) like this so I know where you are coming from, but I want to hear your story.

Glad to see you find the blog interesting. Be sure to send it to any friends in need

Junaid Mohammd's picture

Chase, your articles are amazing and I enjoy reading them and educating myself. Could you also write something on general mannerism. One of the problem I face in my life is looking at women. I get this impression that everytime I am standing close to them, they feel nervous and uneasy (I'm 6 foot 1 inch tall with a broad masculine built). I sometimes get this impression that women actually pull up their blouses or button up their sweaters with me standing close to them. I find this strange because this usually doesn't happen to other guys I know. What does this mean? and is there a way to create easy presentation of oneself to unknown sexy girls?

Anonymousrick's picture

So I think I blew it with this girl and just wanted to know if there's a way to get her from acting indifferent or is it too late?

alexstampfl's picture

I have a question, you stated that girls melt for a guy that doesn't fold like a wet noodle. How exactly are you supposed to act to her when she's being mean to you. Playful? Sarcastic?

Anonymous's picture

I'm a girl and I don't completely agree with this. I often don't start being mean when I'm horny unless I've been horny for a while and not getting anything- *growling at the guys who tease*. I'm a simple girl and if I'm horny I will be horny (if appropriate). I don't like the chase game- don't see the point really. Chasing is just irritating and time wasting. If you want someone and they don't want you TOUGH. If a guy tried to ask me out and I'm not interested it's better for both of us if we clear up and say no. Life is simple if you think of it as simple. No need to cheat or over think/do anything

PEACE OFF
Lol- so childish

Anonymous girl's picture

I am a girl and I think that this is mostly right. Sometimes I get bitchy at a guy I want to 'spend the night' with and sometimes it works and I get very horny for teasing him. This article is pretty close to the truth. - Some very horny bitch. ;)

Anonymous's picture

Having spent the majority of my long life living with American women, I have concluded that the essence of adult feminine life, if un-married, is to pretend that she is
Horny! Once married, it no longer matters whether your interested
or not ! This I think is why Divorce Lawyers are busy. I speak to this subject
from several marriages. Today, a good friend, said that some woman, while
they were on a Carribean cruise, asked him, "If he would like to go to bed
with her"? I enjoy my pal, and have never doubted him before, thought
Absolute Bullshit ! I've never heard anything remotely approaching such a
statement, and I've been here for 75 years ! Sadly, they simply ain't interested.

Anonymous's picture

Whilst having a cigarette on a night out recently, I bumped into a girl I had gone to college with some years before. I had a massive crush on her in my time at college - but had failed to act upon it. I can remember her striking up a conversation with me, which obviously excited me at first, but I was quickly dismayed at how 'mean' she was being too me. Although I could tell that some of it flirtatious, it was still alien to any situation I'd ever been in before. She mainly spent the time trying to make me look/feel stupid as well as being incredibly rude and abrupt about me. Eventually I gave up on the situation, and left. Ever since it happened I wondered why she'd talked to me like that, and I know I think I have a clear idea! Amazing!

Either that or she really did think I was an utter douche!

Trevor 's picture

Ok there's this girl I've been friends with for a while and a couple of months ago we were dating and the relationship lastedabout 2 months and then I broke up with her shortly after she started bad talking bad about me and I thought that she was trying to make herself feel better now its been about six months since. I'm on the bus she rarely gets on the bus but she gets on the bus and and talking to her friend and glances back and forth I mean constant at me constantly and then she sits in this seat in front of my seat in looks down. there's a guy on a bus that was sitting behind me that was her ex and she started throwing paper at him and giggled and laughed like a normal friend and and she never liked him since there break up so she flipped him off and I told her there was no reason to do that and all the sudden she started treating me bad and well she's told me that she's liked me and she's had dreams of us having sex and she always acted the same way I was wandering if he treating me mean all the sudden meant anything.

Anonymous's picture

Damn now I see I made a mistake with this in the past. I was at bar dancing next to a girl and I put my hand on her lower back while dancing. She and her friend moved off the dance floor. Then she came back next to me and I touched her again but this time she turned around and faced me. She said in a bitchy way "Hey can you stop touching me. I don't appreciate it!" I just brushed her off and didn't try to tease her or anything. Then I just ignored her even though she hovered around me and tried to interact with the girls in my group.

Now I know she was horny and was challenging me to see if I can pull her in. Great article. Helps me see my mistakes.

girl dancing in the club's picture

No you didn't make a mistake.

There is an ocean between women being "mean" and "bitchy" and women who are furious or outraged because you keep touching them.

You really have to be able to tell the difference and NOT persist when a woman is actually angry at you in a club or bar. :)

Anonymous's picture

Ya know, guys are going to take away from this. "If a girl is mean to me, she's got to be horny! And I have to pursue the crap out of it!" when if fact the girl is just actually a mean b*tch and not horny at all. Much like a moth to a flame.

Anonymous's picture

How so you know if a woman is faking orgasm? How can one tell?

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