Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

If at first your opener doesn’t hook, try, try again. That’s the basis of opener cycling: using more than one opener on one girl. Don’t just open weak then plow.

Not every time you open a girl will she open with gusto.

Sometimes all you get is a blasé response.

She doesn't reject you, per se, but she isn't exactly ready to dive into a conversation.

You may want to just move on from a girl who's disinterested like this on the opener.

However, what if you want to persist?

If you just stand there and keep talking to her in the same way that failed to engage her the first time around, it doesn't work (I tried plenty of times as a beginner!).

Instead, you can use something I call 'opener cycling'... where you break up your early conversation, staccato-style, to attempt a variety of openers to see if you can't get her to hook.

As more and more men crowd into women’s profiles and messages, how do you get a girl’s attention on the phone? By declining to compete the ordinary ways.

Hey guys and welcome back.

Earlier this year, I discussed how neo-direct game makes everything much harder. It can trigger premature rejections as women display high standards from being in a position of power, which you put them in by showing too much interest too early.

Because of the surge of neo-direct game, many men who experiment with cold approach pickup would face harsh rejections and find women acting testy and displaying insanely high standards (because men put them in a position where they do so).

To add to the frustration, the popularization of online dating apps such as Tinder have a bad male-to-female ratio (over 70% of men). Plus, women often use Tinder to promote their Instagram. It is discouraging to be ignored constantly and not receive likes and not have girls respond to your messages.

So men feel that women have high standards:

• Men don’t get results and are ignored on Tinder

• Men get rejected prematurely in real life from using the wrong approach

• Women are in a powerful position to do so due to the frame men set

But there is another dimension I would like to discuss here.

Let’s say, after plenty of harsh rejections in real life, that a guy finally gets a decent hook out of luck.

Now that is awesome! I am happy for him.

He takes her number. He texts her. No response. Or maybe she responds, but now she doesn’t seem nearly as interested. And maybe when the time comes, she flakes.

We have seen an epidemic of flakes lately. There’s a reason why texting products are in high demand. It’s extremely frustrating not to get a response from a girl you thought you had a good shot with, but when she flakes, it is devastating.

This is the subject I want to discuss today. I will not cover the basics for why women may flake, which could be summarized as:

• Her mood may change when you are not around. She was stimulated when you met her, but tomorrow is a different day, and she’s in a different mood.

• As time has passed, she may have forgotten how you made her feel. Her compliance lowers.

• Because of the limitations of texting (she can’t hear your voice, see your face, and vice versa) and you are not communicating in real-time, you cannot calibrate on the spot.

So she may flake.

But something has changed over the years. Back in the day, a solid interaction and some good texting would have a higher chance of leading to a meet-up than today. Of course, flakes always occur. That’s just the way things are. But things have gotten worse.

Why is that? And what can we do about it?