Articles by Alek Rolstad | Girls Chase

Articles by Alek Rolstad

How to Meet Girls at Gay Bars, Part 1: Types of Venues

meet girls at gay bars
Part 1 of the “meeting girls in gay bars” series starts off with venue selection. Namely, the 4 best types of gay bars to meet women at.

Hey, guys. As promised, here is the first post of my series on how to game in gay venues. This will be an introductory post about the gay environment and the different venues out there. I will discuss how to pick the right venues and give some insights into the dynamics of each.

I will leave the in-depth discussion about all the dos and don’ts pertaining to seduction in these venues to future posts, because I believe an introduction to the gay environment is key. So I’ll start with that.

Also, before I begin, I have to share a disclaimer that I will include in every post in this series. You will quickly understand why I am doing this. Here is it:

Disclaimer: If you happen to find an awesome gay club or discover that gay clubs are good places to get laid, please do not tell of all your bros. Truth is, I have seen many great gay venues die because of this. They are something special for a reason, and if too many straight men come over, the vibe will be ruined and the venue will cease to be what it is. I have been hesitant to share the info related to “gay game” for this reason, and I hope you understand and keep this info for yourself.

It is in your own best interest, too.

Anyway, without further ado, let us get right into it.

Why Some Guys Creep Women Out (and How to Easily Avoid This)

creep women out
Girls have guys read too much into things sometimes. Or even chase them around. The result? Women can become oversensitive to “creepy” behavior.

In my first post regarding the lessons I have learned from gaming in the gay environment, a user named Agent asked the following question:

Hey Alek,

Could you elaborate more on the creepy approaches vs. the good ones? It’s actually very interesting you were in a situation where you could examine the scene from a woman’s point of view. By the way, thank you for your reply in your previous post about approaching in day game! You mentioned very subtle approach signals from girls. I don’t seem to notice any except the very obvious ones. Could you expand here, on the subtle signs? ... Generally, I feel confident to approach when the girl is giving me strong eye contact and/or smiling. This does not happen that much often though.

To give you some context, this question was posted in a thread in which I covered some dating and seduction lessons I learned from spending time picking up women in LGBT venues. In that post, I briefly mentioned how being approached by gay men in those venues gave me some perspective on how to better calibrate my own approaches to women.

I will start this post by sharing a story of mine, then I’ll discuss a number of things that make an approach good or bad. At the end of this post, I will sum up what makes a good approach.

Beat Her Resistance, Shields, and Tests with Sexual Tension

beat her resistance
Sexual tension isn’t just good for turning her on. You can use it to breeze past walls, resistance, and tests, too.

I know that after my report on sexual tension, I mentioned it would be the last post in the sexual tension series.

That was the original plan, but things – powerful things – that I left out keep popping up in my head. Anyway, here is one of those things.

Today’s topic will be about sexual tension; however, we will discuss another use for it. Primarily we have discussed sexual tension as a tool to make her horny and attracted to you, hopefully leading the interaction toward sex.

This time around, we’ll take a different approach. Instead of focusing on using sexual tension directly to make her horny, we’ll focus on using sexual tension to deal with her “shit” (e.g., resistance and tests), and in turn, make her horny. So today we will basically discuss how the different concepts related to sexual tension can be applied to dealing with her:

The application of concepts in each case will be more or less similar. However, we will discuss the subtle differences and try to exemplify the process for enhanced understanding. Let us get into it!

How to Do Seductive Listening in Chats with Women

seductive listening
You can’t always be talking non-stop with her. So when it’s your turn to listen to a girl, how do you do so in a seductive way?

After sharing 8 long, detailed articles on sexual tension and closing it all off with an illustrative report, I originally planned to move on to another topic. But apparently – and this was kind of expected – some of you guys brought up some good questions that need answering.

I also stated in my last post on sexual tension that, even though I kind of closed off the project, I would share more insights if something popped up. Well, your good questions have made those “insights” pop up, so thanks again to all of you reading and leaving questions. Your contributions not only make my task as a writer easier, they also ensure my posts actually fit the audience’s desires. Win-win indeed. So thank you again, guys.

A commentator named Mike asked the following question:

Hey there Alek, really great article. This kind of reports help tremendously much to show sometimes a bit abstract sounding ideas and techniques in an actual motion.

I got a question: could you elaborate a little more on the topic of seductive listening? I'm not sure I understand that concept correctly. You state that just sitting and nodding isn’t sexy at all. But from the next paragraph where you actually describe your seductive listening thing, it basically sounds the same as just listening and nodding to me, just in a lesser frequency. What’s the difference between those two? How do you execute this without coming out as not really giving shit about what she has to say? Thanks!

In my report, I did use the technique called “seductive listening.” I haven’t written any posts specifically about this subject, as I thought the report would be enough, but I can now see that I was wrong, so I will dedicate this post to this subject by clarifying what it means to be a seductive listener.

Before I begin, I want to give all credit to 60 Years of Challenge, the pioneer of this technique.

What Gay Bars Teach You About Women, Dating, and Sex

gay bar meet girls
Gay bars are wonderful places to meet girls. But more than this, they teach you about women’s true nature – and sexuality.

Reading Hector’s fantastic piece on why women like homoerotic men, I must say that I agree with his points. I found his theory on how bi-sexual and homoerotic men can come across as more dominant very interesting.

I am personally not that bi-curious. That said, I am very comfortable with physical contact; I don’t mind if a gay guy touches me, even on intimate areas. It is “just touching,” after all. Some women find homoerotism hot – but not all. However, every woman does find men who are comfortable with their sexuality hot. If a man is comfortable with a dude touching him, one can easily conclude that he is not only a very sexual guy, but also very confident.

It also displays that one does not have stuck-up beliefs related to sex and that one is most likely not homophobic (women find homophobia very unsexy). It conveys non-judgmental attitudes in regards to sex, which helps women allow themselves to open up sexually to you.

So I decided to write a follow up with my own thoughts on this topic. Since 2011, after doing a sociology assessment with a lesbian girl in senior high school regarding the gay-environment, I have not only been fascinated by gay clubs, but I have also become a regular in them. There are a few reasons for this:

  • Many gay clubs have a better women/men ratio than straight clubs

  • Hotter women

  • More sexual vibe

  • Less bullshit (less “bitchshield”) – women have their guards down

Based on all this, gay clubs can seem like a paradise... but there are some downsides, too:

  • They can sometimes become sausage fests (for obvious reasons)

  • Gay guys can be serious cockblocks – directly messing things up for you (especially if they are into you)

  • Gay guys can oftentimes be ultra annoying – i.e., constantly popping up and wanting to drink/dance with your girl while you’re trying to seduce

  • Gay clubs can be chaotic

  • You never get “freebies” (as in ovulating horny girls); those usually go to places they are most likely to meet someone (not gay clubs) – in other words, in gay clubs, it is all about skills

  • You need to pass the “are you gay” test all the time – and believe me, women will test you hard on this one

  • You need to have a good response to the “why are you in a gay bar” question

But apart from all this, I find gay clubs interesting. The vibe is uniquely good and sexual in very intriguing way.

I can write many guides on meeting women in gay bars/clubs if so desired (let me know in the comments section).

I think it is pretty niche. However, there are valuable lessons I learned in gay bars that helped me tremendously in becoming better in all venues.

Sexual Tension in Day Game vs. Night Game

sexual tension day game vs. night game
The way you use sexual tension differs depending on the time of day you meet her. If by day, one way; if by night, another.

Hey, guys!

During my daily skimming of the comment section of my posts, I stumbled upon this interesting question by a reader named Kevin:

I just re-read your superb series on sexual tension, and it left me wondering on its uses in a day game setting. I mostly do day game myself, and don't yet fully understand how one can use sexual tension there.

As someone who is good at both day and night game, would you have any pointers on the use of sexual tension in day game and how it is different from night game, and maybe even share your day game strategies?

Thanks again, Kevin

I also believe that this question needs to be answered, as I haven’t really covered how sexual tension should be used in different social contexts (generally speaking: day game vs. night game). From reading my posts on sexual tension, many might believe that those posts were dedicated to night game. They would be wrong.

However, I do see why people would believe this, since I not only shared a report from a night game scenario in which sexual tension was amplified, but many of the examples in the report seem to be taken from night game. Additionally, after my last two podcasts with Varoon, it has become clear that I am a night gamer.

The truth is, I have experience in both day game and night game. That said, I have lately been focusing more on night game, simply because I find it more exciting and I tend to take days off during the weekend. I will say I am pretty clueless when it comes to online game and social circle related stuff, as those areas have never caught my interest. I am a 100% cold approacher.

Now, the concepts covered in my sexual tension series and everything else related to displaying sexual intent that I have posted in the past, such as physical escalation, sex talk, and other sexual gambits, can be applied both to day game and night game – with some adjustments. Those adjustments are the subject of this post.

Let us get to it.

Sexual Tension Report #1: The Girl Who Wouldn't Stop Talking

girl won't stop talking
A case study of how to use sexual tension to sleep with a girl… Even when she won’t stop talking about work.

Hey guys, so today I will finally share a report in which I cover an interaction from meet to lay. Many guys have requested this from me lately, so here it is. Sorry for the delay; the reason I have delayed this report is because I really wanted to finish my series on non-verbal seduction, and then submit a report that illustrates how many of the tools shared in the series are applied. This way you can see how everything works when put together while also having the necessary in depth knowledge of the concepts being applied.

This report will cover a non-verbal seduction. It will be pretty obvious why I chose this path in the report. It was overall a smooth seduction with a pretty tall Swedish blond girl. That being said, I love a wide range of women, and this girl represents just one of the many types I like.

In this report, we will cover concepts like:

Let us get right into it.

How to Use Sexual Tension to Escalate to Sex

escalate to sex
Once you’ve built some sexual tension, what do you do with it? Well, using high notes, and 3 types of make-out, you escalate to sex.

Hello there. Today’s goal is to wrap up this 7-part series on sexual tension, which I hope you have enjoyed. This will also be the closing post of my bigger “non-verbal seduction” series, of which the sexual tension topic was a part. If you are only just now joining us, here are parts one through six:

  1. Sexual Tension Basics: What is Sexual Tension?
  2. How to Create Sexual Tension with Women
  3. What to Do When She Giggles or Jokes (Hint: Don't Break Tension!)
  4. Create Comfort with Her, and Sexual Tension Comes Easy
  5. How to Recover from a Sexual Tension Break
  6. Fractionation as Sexual Tension Amplifier (Make Her Crazy Horny)

Now, I would like to make the following clear: yes, I am closing off this series, but this does not mean I will no longer be discussing the non-verbal aspects of seduction in the future. Quite the contrary; you can count on more to come.

So, today we will discuss the closing, or rather, the final touch before you go in for the pull (i.e., tips on extracting her from the venue back to your place). In other words, we will discuss the final push. Along the way, I will share a few very cool and powerful escalation moves that didn’t make it in other posts so far. So, even though this post will have a main topic, some practical bonus nuggets will be added.

Fractionation as Sexual Tension Amplifier (Make Her Crazy Horny)

fractionation sexual tension
When you fractionate sexual tension – by breaking tension yourself, then resuming it later – you make its effect much, much mightier on her.

Alright, this being my sixth post in my series on sexual tension, we have already covered the crucial steps. You can view the previous installments in this series here:

  1. Sexual Tension Basics: What is Sexual Tension?
  2. How to Create Sexual Tension with Women
  3. What to Do When She Giggles or Jokes (Hint: Don't Break Tension!)
  4. Create Comfort with Her, and Sexual Tension Comes Easy
  5. How to Recover from a Sexual Tension Break

Today we will add some seasoning – my favorite seasoning: fractionation. This post, therefore, will serve as a very powerful expansion on the foundational elements we’ve previously discussed.

Some may consider themselves more or less familiar with my previous posts, which will help in grasping this material. It would perhaps also be a good idea to have experimented a bit with the concepts covered in those posts in order to have built some comfort with them.

What I am going to teach you here is how to push the sexual tension to the next level and how you can gain increased control over it.

Now, this post is some topping on the cake – more of a “master class” thing.

Either way, let us get into it.