Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

Seduction as Offense vs. Resistance as Defense

Chase Amante's picture
offense vs. defense in seductionIn many ways, seduction is analogous to warfare. Yet men’s seduction – offense here – need not be ‘hostile’ towards women’s defensive ‘resistance’!

I’ve dived back into reading On War, Carl von Clausewitz’s masterful treatise on military action. I’d taken a break to read some fiction (such as Edgar Rice Burroughs’s peak masculinity adventure stories) and a few other non-fiction books on various subjects, but now, like a band of pillagers that struck off temporarily to replenish its supplies before returning to the siege, I’ve wandered back.

Clausewitz speaks often about friction, his term for difficulties doing just about anything in war – a force that bogs down what should be simple maneuvers and plays spoiler to otherwise sound strategies. I’d like to write about how this relates to seduction too… but for today the topic is something else.

Because as Clausewitz talks about offense and defense, I see many parallels there to our topic of discussion here. In many ways, within a romance, the ‘offense’ is the efforts to seduce – while the ‘defense’ is the efforts to resist that seduction.

What I’d like to do is highlight some takeaways from Clausewitz that apply every bit to the romantic battlefield as they do the martial one.

After all, as they say, all’s fair in love and war, and the two fields have their similarities.

Talk About Pansexualism with Girls (and Hook Them In!)

Alek Rolstad's picture
the pansexuality gambitPansexualism has become a trendy sexuality… and it makes for great sex talk fuel with girls. Use this gambit in your chats to get the juice flowing.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

In last week's post, I discussed socio-cultural changes in the West that affect the efficiency of sex talk. All my gambits still work, but sexual openness, non-judgementalism, and low-keyness gambits previously had a more significant effect than they do today. We still get positive results, but they are less impactful now. Women back then opened up and loved you for uttering those words. Why the change? Well, slut-shaming is less prevalent, and the culture of female empowerment allows women to be more social about their sexuality. This is not to say that women won't like you for using those gambits; they still have a potent affect-but it is not the magic trick it once was.

However, in some conservative countries with more conservative girls, gambits about sexual openness, lowkey-ness, and reframing sex as positive still work like a charm! So, those gambits have not hit their expiration date yet!

But some subjects simply work better now, like sexual avant-gardism and sexual comfort. The gambit that I am to go through covers the former. It's about having an edge, pushing the norms that help some women become immersed in what you have to say. This allows you to build rapport and get easy hooks. Even better, it opens the gate to juicier, more explicit subjects.

Tactics Tuesdays: Cool Guy Emulation

Chase Amante's picture
cool guy emulationCool guys behave in subtly different ways than guys who just ‘do what cool guys do’ without BEING cool. How can you emulate this and actually BECOME cool?

What are you focused on when you’re talking to girls? Is it:

  • Looking out for cues and responding to signals?

  • Active listening to understand what she’s saying and feed it back to her?

  • Using good tactics and making the right moves to progress things forward?

  • Worrying about what she thinks of you and whether you are doing it right?

These are all useful things to focus on when you are learning them.

They are also things you will be aware of in the back of your head even once you have learned them.

However, guys who are good don’t have any of these things as primary foci with girls. Instead, these are background processes occurring in their heads, keeping an eye on their interactions for them, calibrating on the fly.

What do skilled, cool guys focus on when they talk to girls?

That’s what we’ll talk about today.

That, and how to emulate such guys, so you can get similar results to them too.

Adapting Sex Talk to Lonely, Independent, or Older Women

Alek Rolstad's picture
sex talk for lonely and independent womenMore women today are lonely, isolated, and/or sexually awkward. They long to feel like strong and independent women — & good sex talk can GIVE them this.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

Last week, I discussed social change and how it affects game, particularly my favorite technique of sex talk, although you can use my observations to tweak other forms of game.

Today, the Western world is more sexually liberated, partly due to feminism and the LGBTQ+ movement (who may have moved from older ideals, turning to their own political ideology while maintaining the ideals of openness and tolerance). So, the old gambits that convey a sexually liberated and nonjudgmental attitude toward sex may be less efficient than before. These gambits may still work as the fear of slut-shaming is deeply ingrained in women and society, but the effects may be lower.

It’s true—unless you are dealing with a conservative girl or if she wants others to see her as one. If so, the good old stuff still works like a charm. It’s the same if you live in a more conservative country.

However, I have noticed that it is easier to get more explicit more quickly with today’s more liberal women. That doesn’t mean you should drop your calibration, though. Calibrating in real-time is what truly matters, but generally, you can get more explicit sooner. And the good old explicit sexual prizing gambits conveying that you are a good lover with plenty of sexual experience and knowledge—a man who can give her the sex she rarely gets and badly craves still works.

Due to the modern social climate, the primary issue younger girls face is a lack of sexual confidence and comfort. Gambits focusing on those work like a charm. It is like the new gold.

So, today, I’ll continue discussing social change, concentrating on how this affects modern world sex talk.

As we will see, recent social change has forged paths for new sex talk techniques. Today, we have themes that work better and new themes with great potential.

9 Pieces of Red Pill Dating Advice that Are Blue Pill AF

Chase Amante's picture
red pill dating adviceRed pill offers a lot of dating advice to curious men. While this advice can seem good on the surface, much of it is lifted directly from the ‘blue pill’.

Seduction has a strange relationship with the red pill. The two fields have plenty of overlap on many things, but there’re also some glaring (often diametrically opposed) contrasts in perspectives and practices.

When the red pill first split off from the seduction community in the late 2000-naughts, it more or less carbon copied the dating advice of seduction, albeit infused with politics and just a dash of cynical avoidance. Since that time, it’s exploded in size, becoming an enormous ideological sect that dwarfs its seduction community forebear. Yet as it’s grown, it’s also transmogrified so radically that a lot of its dating advice has altered as well, in some cases becoming rigid and dogmatic, and in others completely watered down.

There are some reasons for this that are worth a brief address. If you don’t care about the reasons and history, however, you can just skip down to #1 and get right to the ‘advice’.

First though, let’s talk exactly how red pill dating advice became such weak sauce.

As an Older Man, Do You Need Money to Date Younger Girls?

Chase Amante's picture
do older men need money to date younger girlsYounger women date exceptional older men. But does this mean an older man needs wealth to date younger? Not exactly – YET his occupation is KEY…

A while back, I wrote an article entitled “What's It Take to Attract and Date Younger Women?” In this article, I stated that to date younger women as an older man, you must be an exceptional older man.

One of the ways I said you need to be exceptional is in your career. I stated that

You can't play the mysterious/traveling unemployed adventurer card as an older man; once you're past 33 or 34 or so, I think you've pretty much got to be a business owner (best), retired (second best, or maybe tied for best), or reasonably high up in whatever you do for work.

Over the years, I’ve had numerous men worried that they wouldn’t qualify for this asking if that means they’re precluded from dating younger women. Most recently, a reader commenting on my article about the 12 mindsets of highly successful seducers asked about this, saying

Chase,

Great article as always.

I wanted to ask a quick question and get clarification on something.

So, I’m reading through old articles of yours and noticed some are about not needing a lot of money to do well with women, but I still get confused with the older man being exceptional article.

I know money isn’t everything with seduction, but with that older man getting younger women article. It always sticks out to me when you said you’d need to be relatively high up in your career, retired, or have your own business by your 30s if you want younger women.

Then you have later articles about how saying you’re a business owner doesn’t win points with women, having a high paying career doesn’t attract women, etc.

You say it’s better to be an artist or whatever romantic hobby you do.

Then there are the articles about getting women while broke, living like a minimalist, etc.

I know you need money for a family, maybe a relationship.

But from what I got from the exceptional older man article was that you need to have a high paying career, a business, or be retired (which means you have money) in order to get younger women.

Of course game and fundamentals matter too, but from that article, money seems the most important because if it wasn’t it wouldn’t have been mentioned.

Every time I think of that part in the article it feels like you won’t have any chance with younger attractive women if you don’t have one of those things with money. Then I read articles after that that sound like you still have a chance because career and money don’t matter if you don’t have fundamentals and game.

So is money and being exceptional only needed for younger women? Were those articles about not mentioning your career or saying you’re a business owner only good for women your own age?

Could you please clarify these things for me?

Thanks

So, all right. Let’s clarify what I mean by ‘exceptional older man’ and why I say those things – owning a business, being retired, or being high up in your career – are important.

And no, it has nothing (or very little) to do with MONEY!

12 Mindsets of Highly Skilled Seducers

Chase Amante's picture
mindsets of highly skilled seducersSkilled seducers don’t just do things different from most men. They even THINK different. Think like a skilled seducer, and success with women comes easier.

I haven’t done a good ‘roundup’ article in a while.

Rather than write something totally different and original, I figured I’d do a refresher piece. As valuable as new concepts and perspectives are, it’s also worthwhile to review important past ground too.

Below, I’ve listed out 12 of the most important mindsets highly skilled seducers operate under. These mindsets differentiate the man highly skilled with women from ordinary men. They are a result of heaps of experience and success with girls – but they are also obtainable through a focus on obtaining these mindsets as you approach, date, and seduce women, too.

As you go through this list of seducer mentalities, take a look at how closely you hew to each – and for those you don’t, examine how you normally think instead.

Women Today Are Less Worried About Being "Sluts", More About Being COMFORTABLE

Alek Rolstad's picture
modern women aren't afraid of being called sluts; they're afraid of being uncomfortableWomen now are far less worried that men won’t accept their sexuality than they were 10 years ago. Yet what’s still key to them TODAY is sexual COMFORT.

Hey everyone. I hope you are all doing well.

Earlier this year, a forum thread by veteran seducer Skills discussed observations about social changes in 2023. He writes about this annually, summarizing social changes while explaining reasons and providing cues and inputs about calibrating to these changes.

In that post, he mentioned several topics, but one that caught my attention was using sex talk (what Skills refers to as second-generation verbals).

From Skill’s original post:

… Physical game and even to some extent dance floor game are 1000% back, More physicality, more people making out at clubs, more pulls when women [are] out... Physical game is back, last year 2021 coming back, 2022 almost 100% back, 2023 was 1000% back, the use of second gen was pretty much nonexistent last year for most people even in lay reports gone...same with dance floor game back

It pleases me that physical and dance floor game are returning to pre-COVID levels. I used to be good at it, and I miss it. I have been using it here and there and noticed it is making a slight comeback. Other than occasionally, I don’t intend to return to that game style, but I am pleased to see that physical game is returning.

The second part of his comment may seem less hopeful. I know that Skills refers to sex talk when he mentions “second gen.” His observations are partly correct. I responded to that thread with a more sympathetic answer than what I am about to cover, and most agreed with me in the thread. This is not to say Skills was wrong, but that sex talk needs tweaking.

And that is what I will discuss today.