What to Do When She Says "It's Too Fast" and Wants to Leave | Girls Chase

What to Do When She Says "It's Too Fast" and Wants to Leave

Chase Amante

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it's too fast for me
You tried to take her to bed, only for her to tell you "It's too fast for me." Your solution: 5 options that can smooth things out and get her to stay.

You ran the courtship (up until now) to perfection. Sparks flew when you talked to her. She laughed at your jokes (and you were wittier than usual). You remembered to touch, and touched her well. You took the lead and led her home.

Everything went great -- till a moment ago. Then as you tried to kiss her, she distanced herself from you. She told you "It's too fast for me."

You tried to persist; she said "I think I should go."

What do you do? Deep within your gut, you know if she leaves, she's gone. Your lizard brain knows what happens when you come this close then fail to close the deal. Yet you also freeze up with fear: you live in a paranoid feminist society. Many women now view male persistence as all but analogous to assault. The last thing you want to be is pushy... especially while alone with a woman you're only just getting to know.

Must you surrender? Must you let her go... say goodbye to a happy coupling never to be? Cast her into the wilderness to find a man less desirable than you, less wonderful than you, who will please her less than you?

Seems like a tragedy, doesn't it? It shouldn't have to end on so ignominious a turn.

And while there's no 100% way to change a girl's mind as she's on her way out, there are a few things you can try. But first you must understand why, when things had gone so well to that point, she suddenly balked.

Chase AmanteAbout the Author: Chase Amante

Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone. So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating. After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website. He will teach you everything he knows about girls in one single program in his One Date System.



Varoon Rajah's picture

I'm glad to see someone finally wrote about this... it was a sticking point of mine for a solid year and a half in 2016-2017. I remember bringing home so many girls (~25-35?), only to lose them in the moment right before sex because I didn't address this response correctly. Definitely cut my success rate by 2/3s at the time. I would usually stop, then restart and persist, until she left. Sometimes this worked, but it mostly did not.

I ended up switching to a strategy of #4, which I called fractionation rather than a pattern interrupt. I would usually end the escalation by telling her that I really liked her and was having a great time with her, and then I'd suggest we go out and grab tea/coffee or take a walk...anything to completely change the mood while showing her that I still wanted to see her outside of sex, to manage my attainability.

Option 1 I tried early on, but never had the right frame or sexy vibe to pull off...I'll try this again.

Option 5 is another interesting one...

Cool article, Chase!


Max's picture


honestly Ive been reading your articles for a while and the knowledge you are spreading is simply astonishing. I’ve just read your article ‚why she must not become your mission“ and that simply blew me away, that I needed to tell you: this is all soo soo soo controversial and Germany and most of my friends would probably kill you for what you are saying but it’s the ONE AND ONLY truth, you are truly incredible... take it as a compliment, brother, your work is impressive and changing me a lot.


Greetings from Getmany

Morra's picture

Hey Chase, I'd like to subscribe for OD & TDA. Am wondering though (1) Are the videos downloadable? (2) What is the total capacity of the whole 50 hr course? 70 GB perhaps?

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