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U's picture

Hi,

Phenomenal article chase. Thought I'd get your take on something that baffles me.

I don't drink. I also feel like I don't want my partner to drink because it goes against the values that I hold. Am I right that obviously I can't expect this of someone just because we choose our own values? Yet i meet lots of women who do drink and because I don't drink I keep these as casual encounters stating that there's fundamental differences between us eg I'm Muslim, value modesty and non alcohol, whereas they are different.

So I guess this is a problem which I'm running into, I suppose it goes along the line of this. If I want someone to share my values, but then ofcourse I can't simply blatantly say that ... Can I?

How would one go about handling this challenge of differing values, religions - do we just wait and find the right person who we do match on, or do we adopt the rogue approach as advised? Or do we fundamentally accept that we can't reasonably expect others to change the way they dress and the things they do just to be with you in a serious relationship?

What's the go in situations like this?

21 and confused,
U

Thanks!