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Bo's picture

Hey Chase,

Very timely article. Just last night I was doing research on self-consciousness and stumbled upon a fair amount of interesting research. In short researchers have found that there are two types of self consciousness: public (an awareness of the self as viewed by others) and private (the tendency for introspection) [1].

Public self consciousness makes you more aware of how you are percieved by others and research has showed that it can magnify the impact of positive and negative social outcomes [2] as well as make it harder to express your true thoughts and feelings [3]

As someone who was very self conscious, both publicly and privatly, I can say that it has very deterimental effects in seduction (crippling approach anxiety, being too nice and nonthreatening) and will limit your success with women if not handled.

The only remedy I've gleaned from research is to change the focus of your attention from self focused to task focused attention. While research has shown a correlation between self focused attention and heterosocial anxiety in high school boys [4], and that self focused attention is extremely prevelant in people suffering from clinical disorders [5] (including depression [6]), I've seen studies that like this [7] that show that the difference between those with test anxiety and those without was simply that "the highly test-anxious person divides his attention between self-relevant and task-relevant variables, in contrast to the low-test-anxious person who focuses his attention more fully on the task."

I'd love to see you tackle self consciousness in an article Chase. Although I've come far in battling my own self conscious thoughts, it's still something I struggle with as a budding seducer. I'm sure your take on the issue would prove to be helpful for tons of guys like me.

Best,

Bo

 

Sources:

[1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-consciousness#Psychology

[2] https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1980-20980-001

[3] https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1981-25771-001

[4] https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/BF01173909

[5] https://psycnet.apa.org/buy/1990-14799-001

[6] https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2F0022-3514.52.5.994