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Chase Amante's picture


The one thing to remember here is if she wants to be with you, she'll squelch her disgust at your dirty kitchen with the greasy kitchen towels and the cockroaches that skitter off when she turns the light on. But if her other needs stop being met and she sours on you, and it's time to rationalize her decision why to you, suddenly you'll get an earful about how your kitchen has always disgusted her and she's sick of dating a pig.

The reason is something she genuinely cared about. But it gets amplified up into being a big deal when she's angry or upset at you, and it becomes a dealbreaker when she decides to dead you out.

The reality is the dirty kitchen was a minor contributing factor. The real cause are other things, like a gradual breakdown in respect, or her coming to the conclusion you will never give her the relationship she wants. But she isn't fully aware of those other things, or prefers not to articulate them, so you hear all about how you being a slob is the reason she's leaving.

Women engage in a ton of rationalization. You can't take what they say at face value too much; always need to be looking for the subtext.

Alas, if you feel a girl is doing this act, move on and don't look back. Second place is first loser, AKA you lost to a more valuable guy.

Yes, can be the right call.

Sometimes it's just a signal she's about to go back on the hunt for your replacement, though. Usually this signaling will start before she's put herself back on the market. It's simply better for her and less cost intensive if she can prompt her man to fix whatever is wrong and give her the relationship she needs than if she has to steel her emotions to him, sever ties with him, and start sifting through mates all over again.