Why Women Make You 'Dead to Them' at Breakup Time | Girls Chase

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Chase Amante's picture

Sam-G-

Yes, that's an excellent point about other instances a woman will do this in despite you not doing anything actively (or even passively) wrong:

However, could the exact same behaviour be explained not as something that she wanted from you and didn't get, but as a preemptive protective mechanism against a practical development in her life. For instance, a girl knows that she is leaving to another country to study or work. Or, she leaves for the entire summer and knows that she can't possibly hold a relationship by distance until she comes back. So, she cuts you off anyway, no matter what you had to offer to her.

Yes, if she knows she's got to go, and she doesn't feel like she'll be able to handle the emotional separation, she may dead you out in advance of that move, or as moving day draws nearer.

You should be careful about assuming deading out vs. temporary ghosting in some of those scenarios though. I had a girl I took out in college, where we had a wonderful night out together, drinking and talking and laughing and flirting, right before the semester ended, and then she just quit responding at all to my texts and phone calls the final week. I got one farewell text from her after exams were over, wishing me a good summer and saying she'd see me after, and that was it. I tried to contact her a couple times over the summer but heard nothing.

Then at the end of summer, right before class started again, I got a call from her and another girl. She was drunk, and the friend was telling me how much she liked me and that she'd been talking about me all summer. She ended up really wanting to meet when we got back to school. By the time I heard from her I'd already written her off as "I guess she wasn't that interested", and did not expect that call.

Had we not had more school together, and went off to live in different cities, I'd never have heard from her again. But instead, she radio silenced me during summer when we were apart, and then picked up where we left off once school began again and we were back at the same place.

Sometimes a girl will dead you out in these scenarios.

Sometimes she's just being practical, and not bothering to maintain the connection when she's not around you, intending to pick it up again later when she is.

Chase