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Chase Amante's picture


This is a good question too!

For the most part, no, you're pretty safe with dinner. If you're the chef, you're doing something for her, sure, but at the same time you should be ordering her around to help, or at least having her keep you company in the kitchen to keep an eye on the oven and be your taste tester for sauces. And there is something very, very sexy to a woman when she sees a man in action doing something capably and well (or even not that well, but he's making a good effort at it).

The provider-y thing to do is to take a woman out to a fancy restaurant, sit at a polite distance away from her, and pay for the meal. If she's at your place, with romantic music on, as you order her about the kitchen, or have her keep you company while you cook, or you have her cooking for you, and you're flirting and touching and kissing, this is a very 'lover'-style date to have.

I'm trying to think of a circumstance in which a dinner date where you cook at home would be provider-y. Maybe if she asked you to do it, rather than you offering, or you offering after she'd done something not good to you. And then her sitting there on the couch on her phone while you did all the work in the kitchen. That's not even provider though... that's just friend zone. I don't think I can think of a good instance of this. Basically it's going to be 'lover' unless you really screw up the date ;)