Why nobody has perfect agency is summed up well in this video.
So as long as you require something of value from another person, you have to offer something of value. I'd think that a similar calculation is made when deciding to conform vs not conform, the benefits and costs of doing so which may also tie into the Red-Black game mentioned by Varoon. Funny thing about life is that in these matters supply and demand tends to balance things out which is why if women really did sufficiently lack agency, then less parents would be willing to raise daughters and thus men would have less potential women to choose from or women trade agency for another valuable aspect in life. China's one-child policy shows this dynamic.