Who Has It Harder in 21st Century Romance: Men or Women? | Girls Chase

Add new comment

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Blogster-

Might be an attainability thing you're seeing, as I suspect it is with Ozzy above. People in general are becoming less socially savvy... makes for more delicate egos as a result. A woman scorned will look for ways to humiliate you (like try to push you into an orbiter role). You don't even need to say anything to scorn her - if she looks at you and her first instinct is, "That guy would reject me," she is immediately into 'scorned / auto-rejected' mode. Tantrums are another clue this is what you're dealing with - problem isn't they think they're out of your league; rather, it is they think you're out of theirs.

Younger women have inflated egos, but it serves a purpose in value-sorting. We aren't borning knowing whether we are a 3 or a 7 or a 10; we have to figure this out by how a large number of other people react to us. So you end up with a situation like this:

Except that in younger women's case, in a casual sexual environment, girls who are 6s are getting attention from men who are 10s. It takes time for them to realize the 10 males will not commit to them. In the meantime, they assume that since male 10s want them, maybe they are 10s too.

After enough 10 males pump and dump / refuse to commit to them, they start to auto-reject 10s, and begin to think maybe they're 9s. If enough 9 males won't give them what they want, they move down to 8s. Eventually they discover they're 6s.

Goes the opposite way for men. If you're a male 7, you may struggle to get girls who are 5s much of the time when younger. Get older though, and suddenly the 6s are friendly. Older still and now the 7s your age are friendly. Get still older and now even some of the 8s want to date you. Etc.

And of course you can speed this process up with game, fundamentals, etc. However, there is a sorting process going on, and while you may 'know' a girl is a 6 and ought to act like a 6, she can't go just off one guy's impression. You may think she's a 6, but that guy over there who is just as attractive as you might think she's an 8. Another guy might only think she's a 4. And so and so forth.

Each person must collect numerous reference points to determine what his/her actual 'rank' is, and what sort of mates she can realistically hope to hang onto.

Quite cool you were near-pro in football. I doubt there's much/any difference between the kind of conditioning you were in and the conditioning the guys who did make pro were in. The discipline required to get into and maintain that kind of shape is huge. Even if you don't use the power/skill from it post-football, the discipline alone must have come with lots of big plusses.

Chase