If you grabbed numbers early on in the night, best way to use them
later on in the night is to text to see what they're up to. "Hey, what
are you up to. We should meet up. -SZ" is usually fine. High-energy can
also be good, if you have plans: "Hey, what's up! Still out? Going to
an after party - wanna come with?? -SZ" Will always be a crapshoot;
some girls will text back, most will not. Really no way around this,
other than to get them super interested early on. But if they're super
interested early on, you should not be parting from them in the first
place.
Took me years to reach the point where I could take girls' numbers
in clubs and reliably meet up with them after. You can still pull it
off sometimes when less experienced (I shagged numerous girls off of
number-grabs in nightclubs early on; had a girlfriend come of this, in
fact), but unless you have the perfect vibe for this it often won't
work. Only time I had it work early on was when I used phone calls.
Though for every, "Oh hey, yeah!" response, I'd even more often get a,
"Oh... okaaaayyy," response to the call. And sometimes even a hang-up.
2. I want to start going to the club alone, but how do I protect
myself from haters and confrontations? I won't be with my boys, so I
need to know what to do to be safe from the haters. Sometimes you can't
avoid them, but I would like to know how I can be safe when I go out
alone to get girls at clubs and bars.
Confrontation/haters dies down once you get experienced enough at
handling social situations in nightclubs... usually. The more socially
calibrated you are, and the more relaxed you are in-venue, the more
other men will respect you and leave you alone. They see you are
comfortable, which makes you stand out in a bad way less (you are less
of a target), and makes you seem more likely to be somewhere you have
social ties (you are a bigger danger - e.g., if they start a fight with
you, they may find out you're a friend of the manager and a horde of
bouncers shows up and beats the stuffing out of them).
Barring this though, stay out of sausage party venues with high
male-female ratios. Avoid venues that play Hip-Hop (high risk), and
frat bro venues that feature lots of very drunk people (moderate risk).
If you know a place is a place where lots of fights go down, don't go
there. Or if you must go there, make sure you go on off-nights and
befriend the staff, so if shit goes down the bouncers will have your
back. I had times in the past where guys would start getting
confrontational in venues where I had connections, and a bouncer I knew
who was on the other side of the room would suddenly appear right next
to us and put his hands on the other guy and tell him to back off, or
boot him out. Those connections make a difference.
3. How do I find someone that wants to just go clubbing? I also
want that person to be someone i can trust. Everyone I know is married
or they just feel old. I still want to have fun. I'm older and it would
be weird to me to find someone younger than I am to hand out with, know
how I can find a club buddy around my age , at my age?
And start by socializing in clubs. Look for cool-looking guys who
aren't talking to anyone. Chat them up, be cool. After 10 or 15 minutes
of chilling and talking, ask them if they want to go hit on some girls.
If they say yes or sure, could be good potential wingmen.
Meet Club Girls Later; Avoid Club Haters; Find New Wingmen
SZ-
If you grabbed numbers early on in the night, best way to use them later on in the night is to text to see what they're up to. "Hey, what are you up to. We should meet up. -SZ" is usually fine. High-energy can also be good, if you have plans: "Hey, what's up! Still out? Going to an after party - wanna come with?? -SZ" Will always be a crapshoot; some girls will text back, most will not. Really no way around this, other than to get them super interested early on. But if they're super interested early on, you should not be parting from them in the first place.
Took me years to reach the point where I could take girls' numbers in clubs and reliably meet up with them after. You can still pull it off sometimes when less experienced (I shagged numerous girls off of number-grabs in nightclubs early on; had a girlfriend come of this, in fact), but unless you have the perfect vibe for this it often won't work. Only time I had it work early on was when I used phone calls. Though for every, "Oh hey, yeah!" response, I'd even more often get a, "Oh... okaaaayyy," response to the call. And sometimes even a hang-up.
Here are the steps for a same-night lay:
Confrontation/haters dies down once you get experienced enough at handling social situations in nightclubs... usually. The more socially calibrated you are, and the more relaxed you are in-venue, the more other men will respect you and leave you alone. They see you are comfortable, which makes you stand out in a bad way less (you are less of a target), and makes you seem more likely to be somewhere you have social ties (you are a bigger danger - e.g., if they start a fight with you, they may find out you're a friend of the manager and a horde of bouncers shows up and beats the stuffing out of them).
Barring this though, stay out of sausage party venues with high male-female ratios. Avoid venues that play Hip-Hop (high risk), and frat bro venues that feature lots of very drunk people (moderate risk). If you know a place is a place where lots of fights go down, don't go there. Or if you must go there, make sure you go on off-nights and befriend the staff, so if shit goes down the bouncers will have your back. I had times in the past where guys would start getting confrontational in venues where I had connections, and a bouncer I knew who was on the other side of the room would suddenly appear right next to us and put his hands on the other guy and tell him to back off, or boot him out. Those connections make a difference.
Start here:
And start by socializing in clubs. Look for cool-looking guys who aren't talking to anyone. Chat them up, be cool. After 10 or 15 minutes of chilling and talking, ask them if they want to go hit on some girls. If they say yes or sure, could be good potential wingmen.
Chase