How to Smooth Talk like a Pro | Girls Chase

How to Smooth Talk like a Pro

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Hector Castillo's picture

How to Smooth Talk like a Pro
The gift of gab can be learned, but it involves more than just words. True smooth talkers master a range of elements that culminate in a complete performance.

Smooth talkers have a deep understanding of what makes a great conversation.

A conversation’s “smoothness” is defined by how it handles transitions – how it moves from one topic to another or goes deeper into a particular topic. It is also defined by how the conversation’s errors are handled (e.g., awkward points, miscommunications, etc.).

The fewer “errors” in a conversation, and the better those errors are handled, the more smooth a conversation will feel. But transitions must also lead somewhere – a conversation can be smooth but boring, and that’s not worth much.

Thus there should be good emotions involved. A conversation shouldn’t only be smooth and fun, but also enriching.

You want the other person – or people – to walk away having learned something, felt a great connection with you, and gained more respect for your character.

What’s difficult to teach about conversation, of course, is the details.

“What do I say?”

If you expect me to tell you what to say, you’ll be disappointed. What to talk about depends on the environment, the context, the people. The occasional anecdote can be great if the context is right for it. But going in with pre-fabricated conversations can backfire, because a good conversation is dynamic. Conversations are note speeches.

What matters most is being able to start a conversation, then keep it going no matter where it goes. Context is everything with a conversation. The ability to make the conversation interesting depends on your familiarity with the context, whatever it may be.

There is one secret that I learned to developing good conversational skills, but it is not in and of itself the answer, only a force that propels you. At the end of this article, I will reveal it, but in order to utilize it, you’ve got to know the basics.

So, to start, I will teach you a system to learn how to smooth talk like a pro. If followed properly, people will seek out your company, because they know the value and the positive motions that will follow in the wake of your presence.

Let’s get to it.

Comments

Patrick Star's picture

Hector,

Love the piece. The curiosity section made me think. When you know the direction someone may be about to take conversation in because you've experienced similar conversations before, or you think you have a clue on what the person is motivated by, what's a way to make them think about their motivations in conversation without being so blatantly obvious in your attempt? I think Socratic Questioning is a valuable skill and when combined with genuine curiosity it can produce great results and/or transition well into a deep dive, but I feel like when I try to use it I come off as prying or perhaps too directly personalizing the question. If you could think of an example or any feedback and the idea I'd really appreciate it. 

 

Patrick

Vermmmin's picture

Hey Hector, great article first of all! You keep coming up with the goods.

My question was how do i find out what motivates people and what makes them tick? I remember in KOC a story about a kid that didn't like you in one of the classes. You guys got paired up and you said you knew exactly how this guy operated and the kind of person he is, after hanging out you ended up making him like you and were right in your approach. What do I have to work on o get this ability to read what kind of person someone is, what makes them tick and how to alter my behaviours around them? I know I have to meet lots of people but what else?

Thanks brother!

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