A Day in the Life of the 21st Century Woman | Girls Chase

A Day in the Life of the 21st Century Woman

Chase Amante

Hey! Chase Amante here.

You've read all the free articles I can offer you for this month.

If you'd like to read more, I've got to ask for your help keeping the lights on at Girls Chase.

Click a plan below to sign up now and get right back to reading. It's only 99¢ the first month.

Already a GirlsChase.com subscriber? Log in here.

a day in the life of a woman
What’s a normal day look like for a regular girl? Work, friends, gym, guys – lots of guys, of all kinds – and that’s just the start.

Monica’s phone alarm goes off. It’s 7:00 AM. “Ugh,” she groans. She stayed up too late to watch that stupid show again. It always seems like a great idea when she’s into it. And then it seems like dumbest, most vapid thing ever when she wakes up sleep deprived the next day. She slides her finger across the phone screen to disable the alarm, and rolls out of bed.

She shambles over to the bathroom, yanks her panties down, and plops down onto the seat. Pee hisses out. She feels relieved. She gives a few wipes, flushes the toilet, and gets up to go into the kitchen.

Breakfast... should she or shouldn’t she? She stares into her cupboard. She’s skipped it every other morning this week so far. “No breakfast” is part of her master plan to shed this light extra layer of blubber that’s crept onto her waistline. Nobody else seems to have realized she isn’t super super skinny anymore yet, but she’s realized it. Hunger overrules the desire to drop a few pounds and she pours herself a bowl of cereal. Well, at least it’s healthy cereal, she reasons. She munches on her breakfast at the table while she reads on her phone.

Looks like normal drama on her social media today. That crazy single mother Abigail in her network had posted another two-paragraph self-justification dressed up as life advice. This time she’d posted about how life is all about experience and travel and not being held back from going for the man you want. That got her a slew of likes and praise (“SO TRUE!”)... until Maria couldn’t help herself and weighed in: “That’s maybe also why 2 kids, 2 dads, still single though, right? #lifechoices.” The comments on the post exploded after that. Monica snorts out a laugh. Maria is her workmate who never held her tongue (or her punches). About 90% of the comments under Maria’s remark are other women scolding her. But Monica knows most of those women secretly hold opinions closer to Maria than to Abigail. She thinks about clicking ‘Like’ on Maria’s post, then decides she doesn’t need to get involved in that debacle.

After breakfast, she puts her bowl, spoon, and glass in the sink. There are a few days’ worth of dishes in there. Gotta clean those before they start to attract bugs, she thinks. She quick washes any milk and crumbs out of the bowl, then leaves it for a proper wash later.

She puts her hair up in a bun and takes a quick shower, using the handheld showerhead to rinse. She spends a little too long with the shower jet aimed at her clitoris. Then she moves down and rinses her legs. She gives herself a quick scrub with some soap and a pouf, then another rinse, then it’s out of the shower. She dresses herself in a neat, tidy little business-y outfit, brushes her teeth, does her hair, and grabs her purse and her duffle bag with gym clothes, then it’s out the door and off to work.

Chase AmanteAbout the Author: Chase Amante

Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone. So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating. After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website. He will teach you everything he knows about girls in one single program in his Mastery Package.



BMontana's picture

Hey Chase, interesting topic.

Here are some random questions that are running through my head:

Why did you decide to go with Monica as your role model for the 21th century woman? You could have done Beth or Maria. Or is it because it didn't matter? Would Beth and Maria experience days like Monica's and vice versa?

Is Monica a relationship type of a girl in your oppinion or would she have hooked up with a guy the same night, if she found him attractive enough?

So basically this story shows that Monica gets attention from early on in the day by her ex boyfriend, the metro guy (in reality it would be even more guys staring at her), her job colleague, the guys in the gym, Kip and random guys in the club.

So since she passed on sex, would you think she is better looking than Beth and Maria or do you think she has higher standards than them?

And what about her age? 25-28?

blogster's picture

I really think you are missing the overall points Chase is making.

BMontana's picture

What would that be?

Obviously she is an attractive woman with lots of options and Kip got her attention the most. As we know, the very next day another "Kip" guy might have approached her as well. Her life will always be like this until she gets older or marries. So what am I missing?

Chase Amante's picture


I went for an 'every girl', as close to a normal, average woman as possible. There are many more women with average personalities than there are with feisty ones or aggressive ones. A person's day will of course be different, depending on her personality, environment, appearance (fundamentals), random chance, etc.

Pretty much every girl will hook up with a guy the same night if she finds him attractive enough. The difference between different girls is how high the bar is set for "attractive enough to hook up with in a night", and what specific qualities she's rating his attractiveness along.

I'm not going to speculate on her looks or her standards; either or both or neither could be the case, as they are with real world women.

Age: sure, could be that. Or could be younger. Or older. I specifically made the story broadly applicable. She's an 'every girl'.


JJ's picture

☆☆☆☆☆♡Five stars! Lol Impressive, you'd be a fantastic romance author, (ツ)hahaha. I need more! Monica needs to nail total alpha mysterious Kip, the beta beggar of Calder & at least 12 more guys, girls going to need a packed stash (ツ). Loser Lincoln :3 goes though, the guy is soiled goods, time to move on. I'm digging it Chase! keep more of the along these lines coming if you would pls & thx.

KIP LOVER's picture


KipFanFic's picture

(>^.^)> kip <(^.^<) omg kip is so dreaaammyy <3<3<3 dream daddy :3 *tongue emoji*

Joym's picture

Hello Chase,

Could you cover a day in the life of a natural?

THe Man's picture

Yea do this if you can. It would be a VERY interesting read.

uForia's picture

Haha moral of the story: Be Kip. Although there are lots of segways the story could have taken, like if Monica has met a guy she likes in the club. How could Kip have competed in that situation? The number of available guys for Monica is staggering, if I had that many options I wouldn’t understand why anybody has trouble dating either!

Franco Lombardi's picture


I think part of the implicit message in this article is that Kip, the guy who "approached" her during the daytime (rather than at a night venue where men are drunk and looking to get laid) had a huge leg up on any guy that would have approached Monica at the night venue because Monica knows that Kip's invitation was genuine, bold, and attractive.

So, in that regard, Kip didn't need to compete at all. He simply did something that no men ever do (and women almost never experience -- even attractive ones like Monica), and all Monica could do was think about when Kip would (hopefully) text her. ;)



BMontana's picture

That's true Franco. He did something most men wouldn't do.

But Monica was attracted to him before he even said anything. He was aggressive and made her eat a desert with him, even when she was sweaty. I guess women don't feel to comfortable sitting with a guy in a snack bar when they don't feel attractive in that moment but she did. If it was just another guy, she would have left. So the question is, would it be any different had they met at night in a club? I don't think the outcome would be different, actually they would have made out or have sex if they had met in a club.

Franco Lombardi's picture


I think that kind of misses the point a bit. Circumstances can greatly affect how a woman perceives you; it's not all just based on pure physical attraction. Physical attraction is only a fraction of the pie.

In one regard, you are right: if Kip was some overweight dude with a bad haircut and baggy clothes, then yeah, Monica probably would have politely declined his invitation at the gym and went on her way. But all of those things can be corrected with good focus on fundamentals (get a stylish haircut, buy fitting clothes, and hit the gym). And Kip obviously had solid fundamentals:

"He’s smartly dressed, with a fashionable haircut."

...and he was entering a gym, so he obviously was focused on his physical fitness as well.

So assuming Kip has his fundamentals in place, then he doesn't necessarily have to be a super genetically attractive guy. Once you hit a certain threshold with fundamentals, there are other factors that can largely affect how a woman perceives you, and one of those factors is when, where, and how she was approached. You are going to have way better reception from women when their guards are down in places where they least expect a guy to be bold enough to ask them out. It's extremely attractive to a woman for a man to put himself out there in broad daylight (and sober) because he's confident in the fact that he sees a woman he really likes, and he's confident enough to approach her. It leaves an imprint on a woman's mind that could never happen through night game.

This was evident by Monica's whole attitude by going out that night. She barely had any desire to go, and she mostly did it to appease her two friends and keep herself from being extremely bored:

“I can’t guys,” Annie says. “Thank you for thinking of me. But nightclubs are not really my scene.”

“They’re not Monica’s scene, but she’s coming!” Maria says.

“For a little bit,” Monica says.

But even while she was there, she was mostly just waiting for an opportunity to leave. And this is probably while there were even more attractive guys than Kip hanging out at the club (because there's always physically attractive men at any club that is worth its dime).

The real question is, if Kip hadn't met her at the gym and instead was at the nightclub and approached Monica, would they have still hit it off?

Maybe... although it's a lot less likely. Monica would have had to have gone to the nightclub with the intention of meeting someone (which she did not), and she would have had to have found Kip extremely attractive (moreso than the other men there), and Kip would have had to have said more than just his name and that he'd like to buy her dessert or a drink sometime. He likely would have had to have a longer conversation with her, and deep-dived her, and moved her, etc. None of that was necessary in the context of the gym meet.

So, while Kip was "attractive enough" to meet Monica's standards, the fact that she was so excited about him in this story was due to the circumstances of the meet, and not just because Kip was physically God's gift to Monica's wet dreams. :)

This makes the most sense if you have experience with both day game and night game. You'll see that you'll often get much warmer receptions (and a higher rate of reply over text) with girls that you get numbers from during the day as opposed to girls that you get numbers from at a night venue.

- Franco

Mr.Rob's picture

Curious how close to the mark I am here but I'm betting the point of this article was to let readers in on the psychological inner dialogue that a modern 21st century woman goes through daily so as seducers we can empathize and relate better to the abundance of men that women have on offer to choose from on a regular basis.

Either that or Chase just felt like practicing his short story narrative skills and we're all overthinking this article. Hah in which case genius.

Chase Amante's picture

Mr. Rob-

That was a significant part of it!

The rest, I leave to the reader to find.


Slay's picture


would your facial expression in these scenarios be warm, or sexual?

1. When walking
2. When you're busy doing something but not talking to anyone
3. When youre standing still or sitting down not talking to anyone
4. When you're cold approaching, approach with warm or sexual facial expression?

And lastly. When conveying warmth, should your chin be parrallel to the ground or can it be a bit of an underlook? If the latter, would the underlook be less dramatic than when conveying sexuality?


Chase Amante's picture


Depends what you want to do. On 1, 2, 3, if it's 'look sexy', then cute and sexy look. If you just mean in general, I suggest you play around and see what works best with the girls you like best. I know some guys who swear by wearing an intense, brooding look on their faces at all times and that this really sucks in the women they like best. I for one usually have a neutral/inquisitive or playful/inquisitve look on my face, and find that serves me best with the women I like best. If I go too intense it scares them off and attracts women I don't necessarily gel as well with.

Cold approaching, usually don't go sexy unless you can already tell she's aroused. Otherwise, go with your neutral face - but add a smile. You can do intense/serious approaches, but that's generally only for more advanced guys. Easy to get those wrong and just scare the girl.

Underlook question... wew, really making me work! Slight head tilt to the side seems the best fit for conveying warmth to me. Chin up and head straight feels a bit detatched. Underlook feels more playful/sensual (not necessarily straight-up warm). So if just warmth is the intention, I'd go head tilt to the side.


Jason B's picture

The guy at the gym hit too close to home.

Bndage's picture

Would you say that women value an emotional connection and passion more than sex? Or do they value it as much as men value sex?

Chase Amante's picture


Depends on context.

A woman who is glutted with sex but starved for emotional connection will value emotional connection more than sex. A woman who is glutted with emotional connection but starved for sex will value sex more than emotional connection. And there is every sort of woman in between.

For instance, a girl with a doting friend with benefits who listens to her and cares about her but is not confident or masculine and prematurely ejaculates in the bedroom. And let's say this girl also has some very close girlfriends to tell all the things she can't tell her FWB (i.e., her complaints about his bedroom performance). She is going to value sex much more highly than an emotional connection in the next man she meets. If the next guy she meets tries to bond with her she may be turned off. If he comes across sexy and confident, she's going to view him as someone who can meet her unmet needs.

On the other hand, take a girl who has plenty of good sex on offer. Maybe she's sleeping with guys, or maybe she just knows she can if she really wants to but chooses not to. And for her, all these guys are okay... they're acceptable. But she doesn't really feel anything for any of them. None of them make her come alive. And then she meets a man who quickly connects to her, brings out her dreams and motivations, and makes her feel as though he gets her in a way no one else around her does. For this girl, the connection is more important - and a good connection will make her want sex.

In general, most attractive women are more likely to fall in the second example's category, of having sex available but being starved for connection. But there are plenty of attractive woman in the first category, of having all the emotional connection they could ever need, but no truly satisfying sex on offer in their lives.

Whatever she's missing more, she'll value higher.


kristian's picture

Chase, I would love to read an article like this, but from a guys perspective.
How is it for that top 5 percent guy? Those we all here aspire and work so hard to become?
That would be a nice read, at least for us to know what to expect.

- Kristian

Chase Amante's picture


Have you seen this article yet?

How Naturals Meet Girls and Get Laid

There is a section entitled "A Day in the Life of a “Natural”" about halfway down the post. It's not all fleshed out in narrative form like this article, but the bullets should give the general gist.

Beyond that, top 5% is a pretty broad category. You can have top jocks, top business owners, top bartenders, top skinny hipster guys, top bodybuilder guys... some outgoing, some reserved; some who cold approach, many who meet women through their circles. Each guy will have a very different lifestyle. At least for a sociable natural type, the "day in the life of a natural" lays out the first half of that man's day in a fair level of detail.


SZ's picture

This is the last time I'll talk about this topic, but it still haunts me even when I try to improve.

This isn't a rant or anything, just my thoughts.

Wasted time:

Its more than women when I realized how much time has been wasted. It's actually the 3 big things.


All wasted.

I have been trying to lose weight and get muscular for the past 3 years, I quit my job and used all of the money I saved to live off of, now I'm broke, I haven't been going out like I should have the last 3 years to practice my game with women like I should have.

Time literally went by so fast, things I can't believe that were from 3-4 years ago, they felt like last year.

Also, with my 3 problems it all happened at the same time, I guess I went into a depression without even realizing it until now, which is very sad.

I didn't do these things on purpose, it just happened, I ate like a pig and stopped working out, I quit my horrible job because I had to and lived off of money instead of trying to find a new job before funds were low, I used to go out every weekend to approach, then when my friends weren't there, I just stopped because I had no one to go with.

This wasn't an intentional thing, I just did it, the fact that this lasted for 3 years is what really bothers me and it doesn't even feel like it was 3 years ago.

I have come to the realization that I can't just do stuff when I want because I won't have all the time in the world.

I know you said you had times were you could have thought about the past when you were in school with women, but at least you were young when you started all of this.

I actually had tools to this, but 3 years just went by and I'm worse now than I was before and I'm older.

I'm not young anymore, this is the first time I've ever been old.

I never felt old until recently, that's 3 years of muscles i could have had, money i could have had, women I could of had, wasted.

I look at post I made and I'm like "I wrote this that many years ago?!, I thought it was last year! It was 3 years ago wtf

I feel like I'm in the twilight zone, there's no way I wasted 3 whole years on nothing.

My main thing is the time wasted makes me feel bad, and I hope it's true that I will get over this someday, but I think about all of the time wasted all of the time and thinking where I could be now if I just worked on it a little.

Does this happen to people normally?

I was wondering if this would be worth an article at all, about how time flies by out of no where, you don't realize it until many years go by, how you can let go of the regret and forget it and just live your life, improve, and never have it happen again.

Thank you Chase

Sz's picture

I just woke up from a bad dream about this. I have a bad dream about this every night and feel extremely depressed after I wake up. Everyday I get up I feel like shit thinking about this.

Chase Amante's picture


Every time you feel bad about this, ask yourself one thing: "What am I doing to change this RIGHT NOW?"

If your answer is, "Nothing, I'm just sitting on my rear feeling sorry for myself," then stand up, walk outside, and go do what you need to do to not be sitting on your rump doing jack squat anymore.


Dan Thomas's picture

I don't know about you guys but Kip in real life would have more than likely never got a girl to sit and eat the very thing she went to the gym to work off. This is all after a long day of work, after she had a few guys turn her off to the other sex same day and after a workout with the mental stress of going out later to a place she didn't want to go to.

Yes I get the bold and authentic approach idea....but in these circumstances you can tell this article was written by a man. Women aren't vampires. Day approach and night approach will feel equally as invasive if the timing or her frame of mind isn't open to it.

IMO the most successful guy or hero of this story is the dude she wasn't feeling who excused himself at the club. He saw that she was a red light and didn't waste his time with her. He went off to pursue some greens. This is even in the social pressure of watching his buddies succeed with her friends too, naturally most men would be like "oh they're making In's, we're bound to talk, flirt and socialize all night so I'm going to continue pursuing this one"....but no he didn't waste any time and realized it's solo time and not to waste his effort or risk his moral of getting shot down to lose momentum.

Davido's picture

I live in a small community in Sweden around 80k people and almost 80% of the girls I know in real life are on different dating apps all single and searching and I know for sure they have fuck buddies. Shall we say they are overwhelmed by all the male attentions they get and are so spoilt that they can't make a choice or the guys are not ready to get them in any meaningful relationship outside bedding them only.

It's so alarming and this has made it difficult to get an apartment without been on the queue for a minimum of 5yrs because majority are living single and depressed.

Chase please go back and complete this article because you left the part where Monica returns home after the club night to masturbate and get off before sleeping as I know many women who do this in real life.

Monica may also be getting old and tired of clubs and most likely a social gathering house party would work best for her. I have been with girls here who are just average looking and watched them swiping left on tinder and almost all the guys, infact it looks like they are just using the apps for fun to while away time like Snapchat.

On the other hand I know few guys who are killing it on these apps with multiple lays, which means 90% of the women are hooking up online with 10% of the guys who either don't have plans to settle with one or to put it correctly they can't settle with the whole 90% of women. I believe it is this sample of guys 90% of the women fucking that make them say men are pigs and call men all sort of derogatory words.

Finally I believe Monica left because her other friends were able to nab the kind of men they want whilst she was unlucky even though she was reluctant in the beginning going out, and this is exactly how I see group girls night play out. Two girls nab cool guys, third friend hits the exit door by 1am going home.

As for me when I'm out clubbing and it's to full capacity I do spam approaching anytime I'm in a big city, I don't spit my game more than 5mins.

Jimbo's picture

That's an interesting comment. However something seems to be missing in it.

You say most girls seem to be lonely, that they only hook up with a minority of guys, so it's harder for them to get in relationships given the gender imbalance. But that's only counting the guys in hookup mode. Won't most guys want to settle down sooner or later? And if that's the case, then by the same token won't that mean most girls will be in relationships? Unless most Swedish guys are just not into having girlfriends, which I find hard to believe.

Anonymous 's picture

1. Would u say you could do a lot with an mba chase? I was thinking of just majoring in something easy and just getting an mba because I see that you wrote that in a post. I'm still trying to find out if it's worth the debt and time to get. What schools do you recommend? Should I do it online? And is it worth the debt?

2. Do you have any idea how someone can get an apartment if they don't get paid a lot? I know there's a way because I see a lot of people who make a lot less and have apartments. I want to have an apartment so bad with no roommates, but they all seem so high, I live in the south, so it's not as expensive, but there's gotta be a way.

3. This guy said he had sex with 60 women this year, I can't wrap my head around this. I dream about different women constantly so it makes me excited to think I can do this, I don't know much about the guy, but I know he isn't like a pro or anything. I want to get like that, but im trying to find out how is that possible, or is it? I'm trying to figure out, how can I do this? I would love to.

4. Do you think people lie a lot on forums? I have been on 3 forums, 2 mostly males and 1 females. Almost all of the posters have super successful careers, I find it weird how 95% of them make good money, almost all of them. They explain their jobs, so it sounds real, but why so many people who make good livings on a forum? They all happen to be that successful and all of them happen to be the majority on each site? Either I'm not doing too good, or a lot of them are lying. All of them say they make 50k-200k and most of them say they do IT.

I have never seen so many people with computer science degrees, IT degrees, engineering degrees on a music forum in my life.

5. When I was asking about your progressing over 5 years, I wanted to use it kind of as time stamp on how I think I could improve within 5 years, it would be a good article tho. Just wanted to know if each year was a lot better with women than the last one and what you improved on.

6. Lastly, how can I end 2017 with a bang? This year sucked bad for me, but there's two months left. Have any suggestions?

Anonymous 's picture

Correction about question 1, you said get a master's in something practical, not mba. What are good master's you suggest to get if you have a useless degree?

Anonymous 's picture

This is a random question, but I was wondering if you knew how to handle this, or maybe u know someone who has dealt with This?

So it seems all the jobs I can get for now are call center jobs. I really dislike it, call after call, people acting like it's your fault, the thought of all of the calls I have to take and not knowing what to do, I have anxiety.

I have never had a job where, I had to take a deep breath and use all of my willpower to go to, it's like lifting a heavy ass weight. I even miss days because I hate it so much, and make excuses to not go some days, it's gotten so bad, I lost a lot of money because of this, but each day I don't work, I feel I escaped and I'm so happy for the day.

I know you're not technically supposed to love your job, but I can't bare this one.

You can also compare this to any job you ever had that was stressful like a call center where you keep getting calls every second, with a lot of anxiety.

It's literally call after call, non stop, no down time at all, and it makes me have anxiety, especially when I don't know what I'm doing and the customer is waiting for me, I study what to do, but all of the situations I have are some random thing that's not in any notes.

Could you imagine back after back calls, with no type of down time to get your mind straight for 8 hours a day? 40 hours a week dealing with people's problems? After one call I'm exhausted and filled with anxiety.

If you have any tips for being able to work 40 hours a week doing this while dealing with the anxiety, please let me know, I've been doing this for a while and i still feel no better than the 1st day, but I need the money.

P.s. how do u fight obsessive thoughts that you're fighting hard to get rid of? The more I fight, the more they come in, i also try meditation, but I don't like meditating because the negative thoughts pour in and I can't get rid of them.

I think about many negative things 24/7 and I apply what I read from the article about depression, but it doesn't seem to work.

Thank you Chase.

Add new comment

The Latest from GirlsChase.com