Do You Like Someone? Here's How... and Why (Infographic) | Girls Chase

Do You Like Someone? Here's How... and Why (Infographic)

Chase Amante

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Chase Amante's picture

Do you like someone? If so... ever wonder why?

Paging through some research, I came across a study performed in 2002 by Helen E. Fisher et al., entitled "Defining the Brain Systems of Lust, Romantic Attraction, and Attachment," published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior that introduced a 3-emotion system for attraction and mating I hadn't heard of before.

Rather than breaking this down and explaining it in a blog post though, I wanted to try a somewhat different tack than usual. So, today's post is an infographic post - something you can scan, rather than immerse yourself in.

Here's hoping you enjoy. Infographic below the jump...

Comments

Cheeky Mary's picture

While I'm a visual learner I'd much prefer to read your thoughts rather than bullet points in these diagrams (having both would be even better).

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Thanks for the feedback, Mary.

You know, I did write a post to go along with the infographic. Previewing it on the site though, it looked a bit too crowded, so I removed most of the post and just left the infographic.

The gist of the post was primarily around the difference you'll see in attraction and lust when compared to attachment - attraction and lust both work cooperatively, but attachment by its very nature is largely oppositional, with one partner becoming more attached as the other becomes less so (sex being one of the few attachment-forming exceptions, serving a function of upping attachment in both partners).

Anyway, chances are I'll revisit the content from that (now unreleased) post in a future one.

Next time I try one of these, I'll attach the post anyway and see what people think - better with the content attached or not? Might also be possible to have a post with the infographic, and a follow-up post with the content in it.

Well. Appreciate your thoughts here, and I'll make adjustments in future posts!

Cheers,
Chase

CPG's picture

I enjoyed the infographic, nice change of pace from a wall of text. You should definitely release the written part as its own post though, I'm curious about the details you're hinting at with attachment being oppositional

Mikel 's picture

I think what seems kind of sad is the apparent need for a man or woman to be "emotionally fraught" it's just depressing isn't it?

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Hey Mikel,

Probably a poor choice of wording on my part. I was trying to find a word for "emotionally intense," not necessarily a situation where someone was heartbroken or angry, which I gather you're interpreting it as (correct me if I'm wrong).

The main point of research on the subject is that people anchor intense emotions (fear, excitement, joy) they experience, no matter the cause, on people they meet while in the height of those emotions, and attach heightened levels of attraction and importance on those individuals. And it isn't even close.

I'll probably return to the study in a future article, but there's one where researchers had men crossing a bridge get stopped and approached by a female survey-taker in the middle of the bridge, who then gave the men her phone number in case they had any questions. Half the men crossed a big, sturdy bridge, the other half crossed a really shaky, unstable-feeling wooden plank bridge. The men crossing the unstable bridge were 400% more likely to call the woman later, and rated her as significantly more attractive than the men crossing the stable bridge. A similar effect has been shown for people who go through traumatic or near-death experiences, and it's even been shown that watching creepy horror movies together boosts attraction and intimacy between couples (thus, the long-running trend of guys taking girls to scary movies on dates).

Anyway, any strong emotions will suffice - it doesn't have to be bad, just a strong emotional stress of some type - could be excitement or joy, too.

Chase

Mikel 's picture

Yeah I misunderstood because that's what I though "emotionally fraught" meant, but another part of my mind thought what you were saying, anyways thanks for the response, cheers !

p.s. I've always been curious why did you decide to help out so many guys, like what made you decide to start up this site, why not keep your secrets from other "losers" ? haha

mark's picture

Nice promo/summary for your site.

I will say this, your advice has essentially changed my life. I needed some guidance on how to go from point a to point b with women, where a being talking to them, and b being bedding them.

I was maybe OK at it before stumbling upon this site. I knew I had the looks, but It was mainly just hope or guessing. Within a week after reading a big chunk of your site, I was able to bed two attractive women who still want nothing more to spend everyday with me.

For this, I thank you.

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Hey Mark,

You're more than welcome! I appreciate you taking the time to let me know. Super glad the material's made an impact - a lot of the credit still goes to you of course. Best material in the world won't do you any good if you don't get out and use it.

So nice job, man, and keep honing and implementing. And... hope you're enjoying spending time with those gals ;)

Chase

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