Fundamentals

Cruzer, a Girls Chase reader, comment on the article on entitlement asking:

“Great article, but I want to ask you something that varies from the topic.

How does one have presence?

There are some people who walk in a room and are able to instantly command attention, even though they may not be the best look person in the room......so how do I do that?”

Cruzer (and our other reader “John W.”) bring up a very important aspect of charisma and dominance: presence.

You know that feeling. That moment when a man walks into a room and everyone seems to stop for a minute and take notice. The women wonder who he is and why he has such a commanding energy. The men wonder whether he’s chill or an asshole and why this man seems to be so sure of himself.

Presence is that special character trait that very few men possess. And it is, in my opinion, one of the most difficult characteristics to develop. As I alluded to in my brief response to Cruzer, it is a combination of advanced mindsets and basic fundamentals. And something else as well.

Today I want to talk about presence; about how to develop that powerful and magnetic force that compels people toward you and forces them to take notice. Let’s go…

Note from Chase: this is Alek's first article with Girls Chase, but he's been writing on dating girls, sex, and seduction almost as long as I have. Alek – whom you may know by some other names (I'll let him share those with you below) – is a guy who makes a habit of pushing the sexual boundaries as far as he can take them with girls. His material is going to be most useful to the advanced seducer interested in pulling off more challenging sexual feats with women. Here's Alek.

Not so long ago, I received an email from our dear Chase, asking me to be a contributor here. Could I say no?

So here I am. I am Alek Rolstad, also known as Teevster, and originally known, for those of you familiar with the late, great mASF, by my old handle there, “TVA_Oslo”. I have been in the community since 2007… and I started at the age of 15! Having a high level of testosterone back then, I was deeply focused on taking part in wild sex stories. Years later, I've matured up – not that I started disliking having wild sex (I still indulge a little here and there), but my purpose in pickup and seduction has become deeper in its nature.

My purpose with studying seduction is to get a deep understanding in female sexuality and figure out ways to release women's inner beasts. Believe me or not, but female sexuality at its purest is beautiful, dirty and deep.

I will post a lot concerning these topics – how to release her inner beast… easily translated into “how to make her wet and sexually open at the same time”.

However, as this is my first post here, I would like to share something very quickly, so you can get a feel and a taste of what is about to come.

I would like to start off on a high note.

There it is: the Big Decision.

On the one hand, you've got Road #1. And it is a tempting choice. It seems like a great path to go down... maybe everything you want.

Except you're not 100% sure it'll work out.

And if it doesn't, you'll have lost all that time going down it.

Then, on the other hand, you've got Road #2. It's the safer path by far... but maybe - could it be - too safe?

If you pick Road #2, you'll probably be okay, but you might miss out on the amazingly potential upside of Road #1.

Alternately, pick Road #1 and you risk having it not lead anywhere, and then you won't end up enjoying the benefits of Road #1 OR Road #2.

So, you hem and haw, delay and stall, sending your mind into overdrive trying to figure out which choice is the right choice to make.

Only, your mind can't figure this out. There's no new information coming in.

Nothing else to tip the scales in your head to help you to decide, or force you to.

In the end, you sit there, no closer to a decision than you were when first presented with those two choices, despite endless wheel spinning, mental gears clogged with mud and grass, unable to spin any further, you unable to decide.

This article is designed to help you never have to worry about this ugly (and far too common) scenario again; it the complete manual on how to be decisive, and it's how I took myself from someone who kept ending up in these scenarios to someone who never does anymore.

You stand there, somewhere that you often go, when, out of the corner of your eye, you notice her: a sexy girl in a red, skimpy dress.

Man, I'd love to talk to HER, you think to yourself... but can't think of a way you might go talk to her, or what you might say.

Plus, she's all the way over there, and you're all the way over here; it'd be too obvious if you just walked over there.

You go back to minding your own business.

A few minutes later though, you notice that there she is again - only now, she's hovering about right next to you, looking vaguely lost and confused.

She's over here now! you think. I can't believe it! Luck is on my side! But what if she doesn't respond when I talk to her? How do I know she wants to talk to me?

So, you hesitate... and a moment later, she drifts away, as if remembering where she needed to go and going there instead. Ah, missed my chance, you think.

But it wasn't luck on your side, nor was it blind chance - that was an approach invitation.

The reason she ended up hovering next to you, seemingly on accident, was because she wanted you to approach - and wanted to do everything in her power to help make it easy for you to do so.

And if you aren't recognizing it when women do this, you are most likely missing out on a lot of pretty women who really want to get to know you.

One of our readers, Richard, asked about approach anxiety in the comments section of my last article on Girls Chase about dating for introverts:

“Colt, I must genuinely thank you for your article as, without consciously labeling my game as introverted, it is. Sex hasn't meant a whole lot to me, and even after opening several women, I generally only end up holding onto a few of the girls I meet. I respect what you write, and I greatly look forward to your future articles. That being said though, I have a few friends who introverts as well, and though my game has gotten worlds better, I can't get them over their massive approach anxiety, what worked for me hasn't worked for them. Any advice for the introverted man who has approach anxiety? You've become a huge inspiration for me man. Thank you,

Richard”

Approach anxiety is a topic that resurfaces from time to time on this site, addressed in articles such as "How to Approach a Girl Wherever You Are (Easily)" and "How to Pick Up Girls: The Success Factor, Part IV" and a smattering of other pieces. It was even systematically addressed by Chase in "Overcoming Approach Anxiety."

Yet, despite these excellent write ups, so many of our dear readers (as well as male friends of my own) continue to complain of completely freezing whenever they try to talk to an attractive woman.

I know exactly how this goes. Well... at least I used to. Approach anxiety was by far my biggest hurdle in greatly improving my skills with women. Bar none. I read everything I could, I talked to everyone I could possibly talk to, and did whatever was necessary to try to address the crippling anxiety I had.

Now, it’s not something I really think about anymore.

So team, I am now going to offer you a comprehensive post on approach anxiety; one from my own perspective, to complement Chase's previous piece and the other articles on this site that deal with the subject, to share with you everything I learned, the pitfalls you should avoid, and how you should go about moving forward. It is my hope that this will be the last post you will ever need on the topic.

Most guys who want to get good with girls focus primarily what to say when they first start out.

Me? Pretty early on, I focused on facial expressions.

Ever wonder why girls go so crazy for certain Hollywood stars? Many of them are good-looking, sure... but there are plenty of good-looking men out there that women don't go gaga for.

Stars tend to have some preselection going on, and of course there's the money / power / prestige / social status there to back it all up. So that's part of it.

Yet, many great-looking men make it into Hollywood only to never achieve that legendary "sex symbol" status that certain actors do. What sifts the wheat from the chaff?

Well, acting chops, certainly... and hit movies help. But one of the topmost factors is this: charm.

And what's up there in the mix among the chief elements of this mysterious thing called "charm"? You guessed it - it's what we talk about in this post: facial expressions.

If you get the right sensual, powerful, captivating expressions down, you become someone positively mesmerizing to women.

So let's have a look at seven (7) of the best: four flirty and sexy to ramp up your sex appeal with women, and three for putting a little social pressure to good use... while of course still keeping it pretty sexy, too.

Do you need to do things different when talking to a hot girl?

One of the most ridiculous things I see in the comments section of this website sometimes is this:

“This is stupid. It only works on average looking girls... it would NEVER work on a hot girl / a beautiful girl / a real 10.”

No qualification is given to the argument, or the experience level of the argument-maker.

There's no evidence to back the statement up.

There's no alternative solution offered.

It's just a random, unqualified wave-of-the-hand dismissal, hanging there in space, pooh-poohing 2,000+ words of case-making with what amounts to the esteemed argument of "Nope - you're wrong, I'm right, no proof necessary, I just know it! Case closed."

I see it on all kinds of articles. Everything from how to flirt with women, to how to hold a conversation with a girl, to how to handle logistics. It's indiscriminate... to believe these commenters is to believe that beautiful women live lives of celibacy, never interacting with those base creatures called "men," immune as they are to the charms of "men."

It's silliness.

But I understand where it comes from.

To the average man, hot and beautiful women really ARE like strange creatures from another world.

Mr. Regular Guy never interacts with them.

He never gets to know them.

To them, he does not exist, and to him, they exist merely as dreams... fantasies.

Is it really no different when you talk to a hot girl?

Or could it be there's something I'm not telling you?