My Past History

Ken

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jul 13, 2015
Messages
227
Location
Staten Island, NY
https://www.theodysseyonline.com/sexual-harassment-college-campus

That man she was talking about, that man was me.

I was originally going to post this on the 15th, two years to the day that article was written, but I got lazy and procrastinated. But I did show that article on that day to one of my longtime friends from college that I knew since high school, and while he said that asking a girl if she is a virgin is a bad look, we are still friends and it has not affected how he views me.

A few years ago, I nearly got expelled from college. That article was her version of the events. Some things went down the way she described it in that article, while other things did not. I told my side of this story to Richard last summer, without disclosing her name. Here it is:

I have this thing that will not keep going away. It's about a cold approach I made last year.

So last year, while I was walking to the bus inside my campus, I approached a girl that I saw from the campus newspaper that I'm a part of. I introduced myself, talked to her and got on the bus together. We talked, and then I asked her out. She said no because she was too busy with school. I kept asking her questions like "have you had sex before?" and "are you a virgin?" and clearly made her uncomfortable. My stop came first, I said bye to her and left.

Then, the next semester, we had an English class together. I was determined to make things right with her. That's where the problems began. I tried approaching one day after class, but as soon as I touched her shoulder she walked off. That was a moment of weakness for me, a dumb decision that I tried again some other day after that class and she looked the other way. She soon walked to the other part of the hallway. She gave me the middle finger in class when I looked at her one time. And during that same class, she spoke to the professor out in the hallway. I thought I was gonna get expelled for stalking or sexual harassment. Fortunately, that didn't happen. But it left me scared for the next several days.

Richard gave me advice on how to deal with her. I saw her a few times after I sent that PM, but I never talked to her again.

That was my first attempt to include sex talk in my cold approaches. It failed. Badly. I was unsubtle. Later that year, I made another approach where I was more subtle with the sex talk, influenced by the advice of a member on this board. It went better. And earlier this year, I included more subtle sex talk with a girl that I am friends with when I asked her out.

Anyway, the moral of this story is: being accused of sexual harassment is no joke. I got lucky. If she told someone, I would not be in college right now.
 
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