"Hook Up Culture"

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
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Nov 20, 2012
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i went through an article of "The Secret to Hooking Up with Friends" . Hooking up with friends is something that is largely advertised but is not getting results for most men. Even so in the media industry like Sex and the City. Not just in the media, but skimpy suits, beach parties, music industry, a lot.

i am wondering what is the false behind all this or what is the idea that 'sex' sells a lot. Maybe Chase could have some insight. I have no idea. Just this ferocious idea of hooking up and all and yet, people are still not getting it.

Zac
 

Nova

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
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Nov 27, 2012
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in an air-plane toilet, having sex
I don't think I quite understand what your asking to be honest.

Something along the lines of 'why is it hard for guys to hookup with their female friends?' Simply because that's who she sees you as, a friend, not a lover. You are too involved in her life. Its possible to hookup with female friends but extremely hard and you will have to alter how you see her as a person and how you act around her entirely. Even then it will take ages and is just not worth it imo. Perhaps the one time she will be more receptive is after a breakup, looking for someone to satisfy her sexual needs. But to be honest I have no experience of hooking up with friends.

Or are you asking why their is so much sex in the media etc. I believe because sex is very meaningful to people and evoking someones sexual side creates powerful emotions that they will naturally link to a product, song, service and feel drawn towards... But honestly, im no marketing expert.
 

Chase

Chieftan
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The impression you'll get from the media is that everybody's hooking up left and right, all the time.

In the United States, the average age at first marriage for a woman is about 27 years old. If you're talking college-educated women, and most of the guys on this board have gone to or are in college right now, it's probably closer to 31 or 32. If you imagine a reasonably sexually active woman loses her virginity at 16 or 17 and has 30 partners before she gets married at 31 or 32, that sounds like a lot, but it's actually only 2 partners a year.

2 partners in an entire year... that puts it in some crazy perspective. A lot of guys hear a girl's been with 30 guys, and say, "Whoa! That's a lot." Then they hear she's only slept with 2 guys this year, and they say, "Eh, that's nothing!"

It's REALLY hard to get accurate numbers, but my guess for the average college-educated girl who goes on to have her own career is probably somewhere between 15 and 35 partners lifetime in this day and age, unless she's a serial monogamist and has lots of long-term boyfriends. Most girls in the West go through stints where they're in committed relationships for 2 or 3 years, and then they break up and go out and sleep with 5 or 6 guys in a 6- to 8-month period.

ZacAdam said:
i am wondering what is the false behind all this or what is the idea that 'sex' sells a lot. Maybe Chase could have some insight. I have no idea. Just this ferocious idea of hooking up and all and yet, people are still not getting it.

If you watch Western TV and movies, you'll think planes are crashing all the time, and people shoot each other left and right, and hospital ERs are constantly filled with attractive young people hanging on the edge of life from some traumatic injury (and not 90% heart attacks or falls in the bathroom by people who are 60+, like most ERs). Writers for the media seize on the most gripping stories and write about them.

You wouldn't want to watch a show that showed some girl going out on 50 different episodes and only hooking up with a guy during 2 of them, would you? Or an ER that's filled with people just sitting around patiently waiting for their chance to see the doctor... real life is way too boring for TV.

Chase
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Nov 20, 2012
Messages
6,553
Chase,

Chase said:
2 partners in an entire year... that puts it in some crazy perspective. A lot of guys hear a girl's been with 30 guys, and say, "Whoa! That's a lot." Then they hear she's only slept with 2 guys this year, and they say, "Eh, that's nothing!"

It's REALLY hard to get accurate numbers, but my guess for the average college-educated girl who goes on to have her own career is probably somewhere between 15 and 35 partners lifetime in this day and age, unless she's a serial monogamist and has lots of long-term boyfriends. Most girls in the West go through stints where they're in committed relationships for 2 or 3 years, and then they break up and go out and sleep with 5 or 6 guys in a 6- to 8-month period.

In Asia here, I would like to mention, according to my observation, An average girl who is married for here, is a diploma student and graduate at the age of 20, some taking their university and finish at the age of 24 or 25, most of them gets married at about 25 or 26, and for university graduate for that matter, around 32.

the diploma student have an average sex life, about 5 partners, and her additional 'forgotten past' (which an article you wrote, and i found it to be well regarded because i see it happen during relationships in friends and facebook, people, given the chance to flirt, they will take the best 'pie' out there.) are about four to five, I would say more. The university graduate would be more likely to have lesser partners and more of her 'forgotten past', casual flings and sex due to studies and Asian Parents i would say.

In Asia, likely the numbers are about to 10 to 25.

Chase said:
If you watch Western TV and movies, you'll think planes are crashing all the time, and people shoot each other left and right, and hospital ERs are constantly filled with attractive young people hanging on the edge of life from some traumatic injury (and not 90% heart attacks or falls in the bathroom by people who are 60+, like most ERs). Writers for the media seize on the most gripping stories and write about them.

I would add here and put that the recent uprising in speeches and people like Obama, Oprah WInfrey, Abrahim Hicks as examples are getting headway because there is a growing drastic contrast between people who are happy and who are not, success and failure, what's real life and media, what's violent and peace.

Two sides, Drastic contrast of feeling.

Thanks Chase for letting me "See the Room". I able to see and associate things, and categorize, and hope to be able to manage better excellent.

I feel that people wants to be connect on a deeper emotion, and hence i write religion, sex and the media, movies like Iron Man, The Avengers, self help like Abraham Hicks, Jack Canfield Chicken Soup for the Soul and a whole lot more.

Real life is like plugging away from the Matrix. The matrix is great but not any huge among of control and it's chaos.

Just like Yin and Yang, there's always two sides of the coin you need to play. Funny how great things come in two. One is the stronger, the other, the supporting cast.

the motto just got in my head, "The King is the Leader, The Queen, (however) can't be replaced"

Life's amazing,
Zac
 
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