Girls Keeping Secret Boyfriends. Chase, I need you brother.

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Nov 20, 2012
Messages
6,553
Hello People,

First off,
Chase, thank you. You have always mention move fast, precedent. I never understood this is actually more deep, how fucking deep this is, until i see this happen quite a few times and i see this with other people

Girls always say they want a career before they settle down. I never thought of that until i see enough number of girls never EVER EVER mention their boyfriends around me. I seen enough girls sudden U-turn where i am the lover when we are not seen among others but i'm a doormat or non existent when others are around. I see this with girls having secret boyfriends on instagram, or anywhere, enough of them.

It's not that they want to cheat on the guy but.....

I realize the lesson i know but never internalize. Roles. On a sidenote, my mindmap on the human and causality is so fucking spot on. But read on.

I don't know if this is the answer but if your fundamentals are tight but the gap of your perceived social value in that environment you are in, is too far, then she has to pretend you are irrelevant. But she switches like a flip a switch.

Of course, i am hallucinating, society says, while they try to add girls from my facebook per se.

Everything is testing, Chase. But i do see this small details clearly night and day.

p.s: :p I might send u an email.

Zac
 

Chase

Chieftan
Staff member
tribal-elder
Joined
Oct 9, 2012
Messages
5,478
Zac-

Right. Big social difference between lover and boyfriend roles.

The boyfriend role is actually the higher (social) value, more socially respected role. Girls save it for men who are higher value than them, in general. The only time you get girls dating lower value men than them usually are when you have women who are control freaks who worry too high value men won't let them have their way.

The easiest way to think about this: if a girl can raise her status by publicly associating with you, she will publicly associate with you.

On the other hand, if public association with you will harm her status, she will try to keep you secret. This actually includes high value, high status guys if she can't associate herself with them in a way that raises her value. This is why you might have, say, a pretty, high status girl hook up with an even higher status guy, but not be public about it; even though he's higher status, because she doesn't have any commitment/investment from him she'll still lose status associating herself with him publicly. It's also why if she has a boyfriend who is lower status or who will negatively impact her status if she's tied to him, she'll usually be pretty mute about him as a boyfriend. And it's why if she has a boyfriend who will improve her status, and she feels sufficiently safe with him, she'll go full public with him. The bigger a status boost he provides, the more public she'll be.

There's a workplace consideration too. Which is that unless her boyfriend is high status in that particular field, it's often to her advantage not to mention him. If she's a relatively successful lawyer and her boyfriend is a very successful/respected academic, it's not often going to be socially advantageous for her to flaunt her high status academic boyfriend among her legal colleagues. He won't command much prestige, and her colleagues may even wonder "Why is she with an academic? She couldn't find a good enough lawyer to pair up with?" On the other hand, if she's a relatively successful lawyer, and her boyfriend is a partner at one of the most prestigious firms in town, odds are good everyone in her workplace will know it -- because it improves her status there, and helps her career and social power in that environment.

Chase
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Nov 20, 2012
Messages
6,553
Chase,

Thank you. God blessed. or Eckhart toile blessed. or pseudosciene blessed. Thank you, really. :)

Zac
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Nov 20, 2012
Messages
6,553
Hello
EBERYONE. ebERYone


PROACTIVITY,
HERE'S YOUR ANSWER!
COMMON DOWN!
:cool:
 
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