Real risk of false rape accusation or being overly paranoid?

Hey all,

So I read two of Chase's articles on false rape accusations and while Chase did mention you shouldn't be overly paranoid and that the chance is small, I'm wondering what the chances are for my particular situation with this girl I'm casually having contact with.

She mentioned in one of our first conversations that she was abused by some of her former boyfriends. Now according to Chase, this is a major red flag. So on top of that, I met her through social circle game. We've been having some personal conversations already and she actually knows quite a lot about me. This might also be a problem. She could seriously damage my reputation in our social circle, which is based around academics. I'm not sure how people in my country would respond to a rape accusation, but I'm thinking it could lead me to be kicked from my study, maybe even damaging my reputation in more serious ways. I'm not strong enough to take up the whole system by myself, or financially independent enough to move elsewhere and start over, although emotionally I could probably do that.

On top of the casually mentioning a history of abuse, she's also in a fucked up home situation. She manages quite okay, but it's definitely fucked up. Now there's some redeeming things about her, for instance she does see a therapist and she does take medication. She talks about the dynamic between her and her therapist and socially dominating her therapist, so she's sort of aware of that . She mentioned her being arrogant while on coke, but how she knows that the confidence is fake. She once told me honestly about a conversation with what I deemed a PUA using negging, telling her that she was totally fake and how that did work on her, yet she knew that it was just a trick and didn't take the bait. She's just a walking paradox: she's edgy, but responsible too.

I don't know what I have on my hands. Is this a fucked up girl just managing her situation really well through honest self-reflection and seeking proper help? Or is it too much craziness, will she get too clingy and dissapointed leading to bitterness leading to seeking revenge, leading to a rape accusation.
Now I've already had sex with her on the first date. However after the third date I noticed she was withholding sex, so I cooled things off and said I wasn't looking for a relationship. Apparently I played my cards well, because she kept on being interested, everytime I reached out she responded and was open to meet or have flirty contact. She also spoke out when she said she was hurt by me cooling things off, which is mature in my eyes. I think I unintentionally also kinda got attached to her in a minor way. She's beautiful, I think the most beautiful girl I've had sex with so far, this might blind me.

I just don't know. I'm really up for a relationship with a mildly crazy girl, but as a beginner my judgement isn't that good yet when it comes to craziness. I have no experience with craziness. I think eventually I would settle for a shy excited girl and be happy, but at this point in my life I feel emotionally ready to handle a turbulent, yet fun relationship. I just know that I consider the risk of a false rape accusation a real one, especially knowing she could hurt my reputation, and destroy my academic career, which at the moment is the only major investment in my future I've got going for me.

So let's say she is really too crazy and a danger to my reputation. In that case I decide to let her down. I could play my cards by saying there's something serious in my family situation that happened, which caused me to get depressed or something. This would work because she knows about my family situation as well as me knowing about hers, so she would just come to see me as a weak man who can't handle some drama (my family situation has actually stabilized over the last two years, and my relationships to my parents and brother have improved, but she doesn't know this). This is fine by me, as long as it doesn't lead to a rape accusation. I don't even care if word gets out of me being weak or whatever, even gay I wouldn't care about.
However (!), I have sort of kept her on a leash for the past half year, keeping her hopes up in some way I guess, I initiated our last contact and proposed to meet. Ditching her now would be pretty rude, and her seeing me as a weak man might then in turn lead to sex regret (from our first date) and a belated rape accusation. I am flirting with danger here. What to do, what to do...

So just wondering upon reading this, what judgment call you guys would make. I appreciate all the help!

read this : https://www.girlschase.com/content/spot ... er-b-women

study up on your campus's consent standard. Basically:
Don't have sex with women on drugs or alcohol.
Be sure people see you in a social situation with the woman after you have sex with her. Pump and dump could lead to buyers remorse. You also have witnesses that you both were happy and not remorseful.
Avoid younger women. Particularly under 21 year olds who can't handle their liquor.
Make part of your seduction involve her being the sexual aggressor. Amp up the Push Pull and encourage her to vocalize that she wants to have sex. This could take some skill.
Have a seduction that involves multi date buildup.

Thanks for replying!

I will make sure we don't drink or do drugs. She has mentioned that she has a history of drug abuse but doesn't do them anymore. I think the coke thing was just one time.
Also I will definitely make sure she will vocalize her consent, that's a good one. On our first date she was the sexual agressor all the time, so I think I should be okay in that department, unless she comes to see me as boyfriend material again and dries up. And I could grab some breakfast with her somewhere, but what would the purpose be of the witnesses? Do you mean that they could be helpful witnesses in a potential legal case, or that they would serve to prevent cognitive dissonance (e.g. "people saw me being happy, therefore, I must have been having a good time")?

I understand from what you say that I should just make sure I'm safe. I agree, and I will definitely do that. Vocalizing consent and not involving alcohol or drugs are good suggestions. But I am also concerned about the longterm, I think I haven't made that clear. I did say I'm ready for a relationship, but I guess what I am trying to say is that I'm concerned about her being a person that would label me abusive or a rapist in general, upon experiencing too much bitterness at any point in the relationship. Also, I think she definitely has some fear of abandonment going on, which is a basis for cluster b problems.

She is 23, I like that she's not naive, I can't handle the low empathy and high expectations of girls under 21.
Also I don't live on campus, nor do I think my uni has some kind of policy on this, but I will make sure I study the law.

https://www.theatlantic.com/national/ar ... der/38788/

Your Greek House should have an annual training on consent too. Wouldn't hurt to have a University official from the admin branch in charge of student conduct come in to give the presentation. It shows that the group as a whole is being proactive. In the case of someone being accused it would be a favorable point.

Thanks for your response!

I don't actually live in the U.S. and I've already left my student association. I can definitely see your point though, and I totally agree. In case you do get an accusation, it would help to have your group have some preventional measures in terms of PR. Am I right in assuming it's mainly an American thing, the whole false rape accusation?

I live in Europe and I was part of a student association for two years, this was before MeToo. I'm kind of a loner nowadays, but a comfortable one at that, I'm actually in a positive mindset pretty much consistently, no social anxiety or whatever. I used to have a lot of mental stuff, but a lot of work got me out of that. Sorry for sidetracking the convo, always feel like I have to defend my loner status.
I don't really hear about false rape accusations in my country, so maybe I shouldn't have to worry. I watched this Steven Crowder episode: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H6dv6G1FWxk and I don't think a discussion like this would ever get this heated if it was to be held at my campus. There's the occasional radical feminist but nobody really takes them that serious the way they're being taken serious in this video.