Girl Types: Clueless Girls

There’s a very special type of girl out there.

She doesn’t know why men do what they do.

She finds male behavior the most mystifying thing on Earth.

She stumbles again and again into relationships with men who are ‘all wrong’ for her.

She cannot for the life of her figure out how to get the men she wants to stay.

I call this type of girl a ‘Clueless Girl’, and boy, there are a lot of them.

These girls are, in fact, the easiest to accidentally hurt, if you are not careful:

• If you sleep with a girl but don’t want to see her after, she can feel used.

• If you have a fling with a girl but want to break it off, she can feel deeply frustrated.

• If you (God forbid) marry a clueless girl, well, man, you’re in for a rough time.

Most of the time, for the average clueless girl, at some point she will somehow bumble her way into the arms of an equally clueless guy, at which point you have to hope that they (somehow) make each other happy. Though, much of the time, one of them is bound to cluelessly screw things up.

Fortunately or unfortunately, clueless girls exist in absurd abundance, so it is worth understanding this type and knowing just how she operates (and why).

 

Clueless vs. Not Clueless Girls

To help you understand what a clueless girl is, let me start by giving you some examples of girls who are NOT clueless girls:

• A girl with a sharp mind who sees through male BS is not clueless. She can pick up on when a man is being insincere and has good instincts that men primarily want sex and will do what they can to get it. If she hooks up with a guy, it is because she goes into it knowing it will be a hook up and not expecting it will be something more. Or if, in a moment of weakness or gullibility, she hooks up with the wrong guy hoping for a relationship only to get ditched, she isn’t mystified; instead, she runs back through the interaction, sees where she went wrong, and corrects for next time.

• A girl who does not care about men very much is not clueless. She’s living her life, doing her thing, focused on her education or career or whatever her preoccupations are. If she dates men, hooks up with men, whatever she does with men, she doesn’t really even have any expectations with them, other than that they will not get clingy or hold her back. She spends little time ‘wondering’ about men or trying to ‘figure men out’. She is not clueless.

• A nymphomaniac is not clueless. She loves men, understands them deeply, and nothing men do can surprise her. Plus, she typically wants the same things men want, at the same time. So she and men are perfectly aligned. No problems here!

These women are not clueless because they rarely or never spend time thinking about men, saying to themselves, “Oh, why, oh, why, men…? Why do men…?” while failing to understand men.

Mind you, a woman does not have to be ‘hard’, a career girl, or a nympho to be non-clueless. I have known soft, wonderful women, very submissive and supportive, who nevertheless could see through male BS with X-ray vision. They are very good judges of male character and intentions.

A clueless girl, by definition, is a girl who dumps heaps of mental energy into wondering about men, while still misjudging and failing to understand them.

She squanders her time and energy running around in place, failing to achieve what she wants with men, while being endlessly frustrated by them.

She is, in other words, the female equivalent of the Average Frustrated Chump.

She is the female AFC.

Hence the term ‘clueless’.

The biggest difference between clueless girls and AFCs is that AFCs struggle mightily to get laid; clueless girls have no trouble getting laid (after all… they’re women), but they struggle mightily to get commitment.

 

What Clueless Girls Are Like

When you meet a clueless girl, you will notice there is a distinct lack of ‘intentionality’ in her.

She has no clear aim with you. She doesn’t really know what she might want with you. She is simply sort of ‘there’.

Non-clueless girls typically have some palpable emotional intent with you when they’re talking to you:

• Maybe they just really want to get to know you, socially.

• Maybe they are exploring you as a potential romantic partner.

• Maybe they are attracted to you and want something sexually.

• Maybe they see some kind of business or networking opportunity with you.

If there is nothing a non-clueless girl wants from you, you will be able to feel that too; she just doesn’t see any utility in talking with you. She might be polite and nice with you, but that is it.

Clueless girls, on the other hand, are always seeking/exploring for something, without any clear object of their exploration.

For instance, a clueless girl may be testing you to see if you match what she is looking for, but whether you do or don’t she doesn’t have a strong emotional intent about it either way.

Pass her test, and her response is a moderate bump in interest. Fail her test, and her interest wanes somewhat, but you can still turn it around.

Contrast that with a girl with strong intentionality: passing the tests of a girl like this provides you a major attraction boost, while failing them crashes her attraction hard. She either opens way up or closes way off.

When clueless girls near or pass age 30, they often switch into ‘agenda mode’, where they start screening every guy they can hard to see if he is “serious about dating” and whether he would qualify as a committed long-term partner. But the very fact that they need to be so rigid about this is just another tell they are ‘clueless’; non-clueless girls are able to vet men intuitively without needing a bunch of rigid rules, and they don’t have to set up rules to stop themselves from stumbling into uncommitted sex with men they don’t want that with, either. Clueless girls do.

Further, you will observe that even if you fail a clueless girl’s screening, she will often keep lobbing you tests just to see if maybe she “got it wrong” and perhaps you can turn things around. She doesn’t get annoyed, she doesn’t get frustrated, she doesn’t get depressed, she just seems a bit confused that you didn’t pass her test.

In a way, you can think of clueless girls as girls who are just “adrift on the sea of life.” They find themselves buffeted about, ending up with one man after another, hoping that each man they end up with will be “the one for me”, only to be disappointed when yet again he is not.

Some clueless girls are lucky, and stumble into the right committed guy early on, and are not so poisoned by social media, or dating apps, or whatever else to think “I can find someone even better!”

Not all are so fortunate, however. Many dump their early guys, thinking they’ll find someone better, then never do.

It’s sad when it happens.

If you’re a guy who’s been dumped like this, it might give you some schadenfreude.

You can’t hate them for it, though.

They are just… clueless.

 

Signs She’s a Clueless Girl

Here are your primary indicators a girl is clueless:

• She’s indecisive. If you ask her about her passions, what she wants in life, or where her life is headed, all you will discover is an amorphous, ill-defined conception, usually something adopted from whatever’s trendy. She wants to “build a career” (with no clear idea what or how high); she wants to “travel the world” (with no concrete plans to do so); she wants to “find herself” (with no ability to define what that means). Basically, her statements about her life goals are cookie-cutter soundbites adopted from what’s trendy because she herself does not know what her life goals are (if she even really has any).

• She’s a weak tester. Non-clueless girls who test test hard: “Are you single?” “Do you always say this to girls?” “Where are your friends?” They test hard because they aren’t screening men in; they are screening them out. If a guy’s unqualified, there’s the door! Clueless girls, on the other hand, are ‘screen-in’ testers. Their tests are thus weaker. “So, did you come here alone?” “It’s not very common to be approached like this. Do you meet people like this a lot?” You can feel they’re trying to give you a chance to pass; they are screening in, not screening out.

• She keeps testing after you fail tests. A non-clueless girl may shut down on you after a single failed test or two. You can feel the interest dry up. Clueless girls will keep talking to you and keep giving you chances to pass their tests. She wants to see: “Could this guy be okay? There were a few red flags earlier… but maybe I just misread him?”

• (If older) she has many rigid filters. A weak tester with rigid filters? How can that be? Basically, the rigid filters (“Must be over 6’ and make 6 figures”) are designed to compensate for her weak testing. She knows once a guy is in front of her, if he has game he can seduce her. So she throws up rigid filters at various points to try to limit the odds this happens. For instance, she may form a rule of “No sex on the first date” (after getting pumped-and-dumped one too many times), and pull that rule out any time a guy tries to pull her without sufficiently boyfriend-disqualifying himself. That’s not a test; it’s a screen/filter. You don’t respond to it by ‘passing the test’; you respond to it by figuring out how to get her to remove the filter.

• She has complaints about men. Non-clueless girls do not complain about men. They ‘get’ them: they like them, understand them, and have compassion for them. Clueless girls do not. Especially once a clueless girl has a few boyfriends/lovers under her belt, she discovers that men, for her, are endlessly confusing beasts. She cannot make heads or tails of male decision-making; men mystify her; and above all, men frustrate her. Why do men have to make everything so difficult? Why can’t men just be simple? Why is it so hard to get a man on the same page with her? It’s maddening! Of course, the reason for her frustrations is not that men are complicated (just like the reason for the AFC’s frustrations with women is not that women are complicated); it’s just that she’s clueless.

• She’s dated a lot. Nymphos date a lot and are not clueless. But girls who are not nymphos do not want to date a lot. They want to find a great guy and have a great relationship. If she has a crowded dating history and is not a nympho, she’s clueless. What constitutes a ‘crowded dating history’? I would say more than one romantic/sexual connection per two years of her romantic ‘debut’. So, if she had her first boyfriend/sex at 18, and you meet her at 25, and she’s had 4 or fewer lovers, she is not clueless. If she’s had 5 or more, and she is not a nympho, she’s clueless. (An argument could be made that it should be one partner per 3 years, not 2; though past a certain point we’re really just getting into “exactly how incisive vs. clueless is she?”)

All these are your ‘clueless girl tells’.

If you see even one of them, it’s a pretty strong sign she’s likely to be clueless.

If you see more than one, it’s more or less guaranteed.

 

Should You Go for Clueless Girls?

If you’re just starting out with girls yourself, you’re fairly likely to still fall under the AFC umbrella to some extent and are, in effect, the ‘clueless girl’s match’.

That isn’t true for all beginners; plenty of guys can be incisive, even when they aren’t very experienced with girls yet.

Past a certain point, you will start to grow shrewd enough with women and skilled enough with them, however, that it’ll become increasingly clear to you which girls you meet are ‘clueless’ and which girls are not.

At that point, you will need to make a choice about how to deal with these girls (which, because they are SO common, you are simply never going to not run into):

1. Will you be the unscrupulous playboy? i.e., the guy who realizes girls like this are clueless, realizes he is leading them on, even if he doesn’t lie outright, in order to get them into bed, then disappear, leaving them to kick themselves for ‘falling for it’ yet again? This guy’s philosophy is, “I don’t care. I didn’t lie to her. She’s an adult. She’s responsible for her own decisions.” Any wreckage he leaves trailing behind him, well, it’s her fault for making clueless assumptions about him – that’s not his doing. Or so he says.

2. Will you AVOID clueless girls? i.e., simply screen them out when you discover they’re clueless. This can save you from the questionable morality of sleeping with clueless women, but you’ll end up passing up a lot of girls, simply because so many of the women who are active and dating are clueless. Clueless girls are more likely to be single and looking for a (or rather, yet another) man than any other type of girl aside from nymphos. (The girls who are non-clueless are usually either in committed relationships or too busy with other preoccupations to be worried about dating right now.)

3. Will you become an expert expectation-setter? i.e., go far out of your way to make it extra clear to women you sleep with what they can expect with you, so they have zero illusions about this. You can use the “I’m a heartbreaker” framing, which is one of my go-tos if I want to seduce a girl who’s clueless (“I don’t know, girls keep getting hurt with me. You should stay away if you know what’s good for you”). Which, of course, only makes a lot of these types want you even more, but it goes a long way to reducing/eliminating any bad aftertaste if all you do is hook up once. You can frame yourself as super sexual, like Grand Master or Alek Rolstad with his sex talk, so the girl basically views you as something of a walking penis, removing any illusions about you looking for something serious. Or you can use my preferred go-to, boyfriend disqualification, so she doesn’t think there’s any potential for a relationship in the first place (“Guess all I can do with him is hook up”).

Option A should be out for any man with moral scruples.

Do not forget the seducer mantra: “Leave her better than you found her.”

READ MORE: Leave Her Better Than You Found Her

Thus, my recommendation, once you reach the point where you can recognize these girls and realize you have the upper hand with them, seduction-wise, is that you either get your expectation-setting dialed in or just leave these girls alone.

 

Could a Clueless Girl Ever Make an Okay Girlfriend or Wife?

Here’s the million-dollar question: are these girls ever worth dating or marrying seriously?

A LOT of girls are clueless. There is simply a bigger supply of them than non-clueless girls, generally. But by the same token, a lot of GUYS are clueless, too. There are lots of clueless men.

If you’re reading Girls Chase, you’re probably not a clueless guy.

At the very least, you will not be for long!

But could these girls make for okay relationship partners?

I dislike them for this, for a few reasons I’ll lay out for you:

• They don’t understand you and find you frustrating. They don’t ‘get’ men, and that includes YOU. It does not matter how much you explain yourself to them. The wiring in their brain precludes full comprehension of men. Unless they take to studying male psychology (the same way you are studying female psychology), they will forever stay clueless. Hence, you will frustrate them, and they will not be reasonable in their frustrations, either. They will simply assume you should be doing things that would seem absurd if they actually understood men (but they don’t). Prepare to be frustrated by a woman who finds you frustrating.

• They need many things spelled out for them explicitly. Look: you shouldn’t be going on a guy’s trip because you’re a guy. Things could happen! But it’s fine for her to go on a girl’s trip. She’s a girl! It’s safe! You will need to explicitly explain to her why you are not going to allow this. Not every clueless girl needs the same things explicitly explained to her (some of them understand that ‘girls trips are bad for relationship continuity’, for example), but I hope you are an excellent analyst and communicator because you will be breaking down and spelling a lot of things out.

• They are accidentally inconsiderate. Want a girl who takes you for granted in ways you don’t want to be taken for granted? Date a clueless girl. How about a girl with an inability to respect your time? Date a clueless girl. A girl who texts you all day long, to the point it exhausts you? A clueless girl’s your best bet for sure. You can’t blame her for not appreciating you or taking up too much of your time. She doesn’t understand. She’s clueless!

• They commit accidental sabotage and sometimes accidental infidelity in relationships. If a woman says “I didn’t mean to sleep with him! It just happened!” that is not a non-clueless girl talking (alternately: she may just be a liar. You should be able to tell the difference, though). Clueless girls will put themselves into all kinds of risky situations with men they don’t consciously realize are risky: spending time with men, drinking with men, alone in the hotel room of a man on a business trip, etc. They always assume “it will be fine” or “I’m sure he’ll be respectful”, only to easily pass the point of no return if the guy knows how to arouse and escalate them. With incisive women, if there’s infidelity, she intended it; but if she’s clueless, well, she only actually half intended it. The other half was just her being dumb and clueless. I hope you’re the forgiving sort!

• They break up relationships all the time to “find themselves.” Remember: clueless girls are adrift on the sea of life. When she met you, it was not because she chose you, but because she was just drifting along and drifted into your life. At some point, however, she may ‘drift into’ unhappiness. That is the point where she will begin fishing around for ideas from the world around her about what to do. It’s very trendy right now for women to dump long-term boyfriends and husbands they have no real problems with solely because “the emotions aren’t the same” or “I never really found myself when younger.” Now you are going through a messy breakup or divorce, possibly dealing with shared custody of any children you have, because other women on social media were talking about “finding themselves” and she thought that sounded good.

Basically, if you want my unadulterated thoughts, clueless girls are just a bit too retarded for a long-term relationship. Totally fine for a hookup, if you manage expectations properly! They’re still women, worthy of romance and affection and a good time; you just need to be careful with their expectations so you don’t hurt them (clueless girls make a lot of assumptions and will ignore even a lot of clear expectation-setting as they try to convince themselves “I’m sure THIS ONE will stay with me”, despite all signs to the contrary!).

As relationship partners, clueless girls are just way too annoying to deal with, unless, I suppose, you are the kind of man who is extremely patient, understanding, and forgiving, and prefer clueless women for some reason that, I have to say, is a bit beyond me (maybe you just don’t feel comfortable with incisive women, or feel judged too hard by them, or what have you).

Basically, if you have the value as a man and the relationship management skills to secure and retain an incisive girl, in my opinion you are simply always going to be more satisfied, with less absurd shenanigans to deal with, than getting into a relationship with a bumbling, fumbling, “no idea what she wants in life” clueless girl.

 

If You Date a Clueless Girl, Keep Her on a Tight Leash

That said, if you’re just really smitten with this type of girl (for whatever reason), and you’re certain that clueless girls are the girls for you, here is my advice:

Keep her on a tight leash.

If you want someone who is floating through life to avoid floating off, or floating into trouble she then pulls you into, you’re just going to have to tie her up or hem her in. You need to be decisive enough for the two of you.

Read my articles on controlling your girlfriend or wife without being controlling, things to forbid your girlfriend or wife from doing, and avoiding control of your woman by the environment around her (including friends, social media, her workplace, etc.).

Those articles are important for all relationships – but they’re especially important for men attached to clueless girls.

 

Wrap Up

A large number of women – generally the majority of single women at any given time (I have no idea if they’re actually the majority of women overall) – are what I call ‘clueless girls’.

A clueless girl is any girl of low intentionality who simply ‘exists’ in life, floating along, going for whatever she can grasp that seems a bit desirable to her.

These girls tend to be unskeptical and easily led, which makes them rather easy to sleep with even if your game is not completely on-point. However, due to their nature, they also assume that the guys they want will of course want relationships with them too, and are easy to hurt if you aren’t setting expectations properly.

As they get older, after too many failed relationships, they do their best to impose rigid filters on their dating, trying to compensate for their own cluelessness by putting men through the wringer. This can help them, sometimes, but at the same time it also scares off most of the best guys, who “ain’t got no time for that.” Overly rigid filtering is a compensatory adjustment for their weak testing ability compared to more incisive, intentional women.

Because these women are clueless and ‘adrift’, it’s easy to get relationships with them, but can be harder to keep them. They tend to drift toward the exits unless you properly ‘tie them down’, and can drift into being swayed by current cultural zeitgeists that pull women out of relationships.

My recommendations are that (once you’re at the point you can recognize these girls) you seduce them by boyfriend disqualifying yourself first, that way they do not get hurt if you don’t want to stick around.

Past that point, I recommend you do not stick around!

Keep them in friends with benefits relationships, and you will have a very hard time stopping them from getting attached, no matter how fully you disqualify yourself as a long-term mate.

Then when you break up with them (assuming you do not fall into a relationship with them first; highly NOT recommended with a clueless girl!), they will beat themselves up yet again for getting sucked into ANOTHER relationship they hoped might go somewhere but didn’t!

Of course, we all have different preferences.

Perhaps, for you, clueless girls are the ideal.

I’ve laid out the risks of dating them above.

If you feel prepared to take that on (and are not just being clueless yourself, gullibly concluding “I’m sure it will be fine! After all, I love her and she loves me! ❤️”), then more power to you, my friend.

After all: someone needs to rescue these poor chicks from their strings of bad decisions. That someone might just be you!

Ciao for now,

Chase Amante