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\u0027ShowBlocks\u0027]\n]\n    ","enterMode":1,"shiftEnterMode":2,"toolbarStartupExpanded":true,"width":"100%","skin":"moono-lisa","format_tags":"p;div;pre;address;h1;h2;h3;h4;h5;h6","show_toggle":"t","default":"t","allowedContent":true,"ss":"2","loadPlugins":{"drupalbreaks":{"name":"drupalbreaks","desc":"Plugin for inserting Drupal teaser and page 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id=\u0022comment-369\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/369#comment-369\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022glados\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022glados\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022glados\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022glados\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/369#comment-369\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EA long time ago, I read a\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003Eglados (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 28 July 2011  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EA long time ago, I read a post about this subject which stuck with me: \u003Ca href=\u0022http:\/\/www.sosuave.net\/forum\/showthread.php?t=165396\u0022\u003Ehttp:\/\/www.sosuave.net\/forum\/showthread.php?t=165396\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u0027d like to hear your opinion on it.  He seems to be giving the opposite advice.  I tend to waffle back and forth on the subject, myself.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/369\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-372\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/372#comment-372\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/372#comment-372\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ERe: A long time ago, I read a\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Friday, 29 July 2011  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/369#comment-369\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHey Glados-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYeah, great stuff there, brother. I actually agree pretty much \u003Cem\u003Ecompletely\u003C\/em\u003E with what the poster there is talking about -- not opposing advice at all!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThis post, I\u0027m talking about cutting yourself short on improving yourself because you think people should just like you for how you are and those that don\u0027t have something wrong with them.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIn that post you linked to, the author\u0027s talking about how his buddy who exudes warmth and familiarity and non-judgmentalism does so exceptionally well with people in general, and women in particular.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u0027m a huge proponent of warmth, familiarity, and being non-judgmental on here, too. For a few examples of this, check out \u0022\u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/most-important-thing-becoming-lover-women-dont-be-bitter\u0022 title=\u0022The Most Important Thing for Becoming a Lover of Women? Don\u0027t Be Bitter.\u0022\u003E\u003Cstrong\u003EDon\u0027t Be Bitter\u003C\/strong\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u0022 and \u0022\u003Cstrong\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/reference-points-and-changing-worldviews\u0022 title=\u0022Reference Points and Changing Worldviews\u0022\u003EReference Points and Changing Worldviews\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/strong\u003E.\u0022 I\u0027m a big believer that warmth and acceptance and familiarity, in concert with sexiness and edginess and decisive leadership and being a bit of a challenge, are the ingredients for becoming as good with women (and people) as you could ever want to get.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u0027ve been meaning to get up a proper treatment on being non-judgmental for months now; I drafted an article on it back in December, but didn\u0027t like what I came up with and shelved it. But for sure man, no conflict at all between what I\u0027m talking about here and what that poster\u0027s talking about in the post you linked to -- everything he says is great advice.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ECheers,\u003Cbr \/\u003E\n  Chase\n\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/372\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-376\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/376#comment-376\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/laurentay\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/picture-2063_0.jpg\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Lau\u0026amp;#039;Ren\u0026amp;#039;Tay\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Lau\u0026amp;#039;Ren\u0026amp;#039;Tay\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/picture-2063_0.jpg\u0022 alt=\u0022Lau\u0026amp;#039;Ren\u0026amp;#039;Tay\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Lau\u0026amp;#039;Ren\u0026amp;#039;Tay\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/376#comment-376\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EDamn son\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/laurentay\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/laurentay\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003ELau\u0026#039;Ren\u0026#039;Tay\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 31 July 2011  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EAye Chase how it going man? I haven\u0027t been here in forever, your still banging out the good stuff bro (: . Hahaha that\u0027s hilarious... just being yourself is absolutely the worse epidemy of  dating advice to man; when I hear people say it to other man, or woman I cringe.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI remember my sister telling that to me in the past(cringe). Just being yourself is basically not improving anymore obviously, and giving up in my opinion. Which with  that kind of negative mindset, could back fire on you, with detrimental consequences ,which equals unhappiness =O . Anyway I really like the one, \u0022just make yourself\u0022...sounds totally bad ass.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EGlados, that link to that post is good, and dead on target. I liked it a lot...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/376\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-379\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/379#comment-379\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/379#comment-379\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ERe: Damn son\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Tuesday, 2 August 2011  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/376#comment-376\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHaha, Lau\u0027Ren\u0027Tay, glad to see you around these parts, brother! Life is good... unbelievably busy, but lots of exciting things happening right now.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYeah, giving up on improving is quite akin to giving up, isn\u0027t it? People like to pretend there\u0027s some sort of nobility in \u0022accepting who you are,\u0022 but it\u0027s really a sign that you\u0027ve reached the end of your rope and simply can\u0027t or won\u0027t try anymore.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnyway, always good to hear from you, man. Hope all is well back home in the good ol\u0027 US of A, and that you\u0027ve been kicking ass lately ;)\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/379\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-383\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/383#comment-383\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Migz\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Migz\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Migz\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Migz\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/383#comment-383\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EBetter advice: Adapt or die.\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EMigz (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Tuesday, 2 August 2011  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EBetter advice: Adapt or die.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/383\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-400\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/400#comment-400\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Kaisa\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Kaisa\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Kaisa\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Kaisa\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/400#comment-400\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EOops... Now I\u0026#039;m feeling\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EKaisa (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Monday, 8 August 2011  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EOops... Now I\u0027m feeling guilty that I\u0027m actually said this one to many guys. Well, if you put it like that, of course it sucks. Yet I feel there\u0027s a point to this advice, if taken the right way.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ETo me, the point with this one was never that you shouldn\u0027t improve yourself. Of course you should, if you can, and it\u0027s great fun, too. The thing you shouldn\u0027t do is to start feeling like you suck, and get desperate. There are guys there who have a really low self esteem, and that\u0027s not a turn on for any woman. Some people criticise themselves so much that they end up intimidated by their own criticism, thinking they are hopeless, they\u0027re doing everything wrong, and until they have improved a zillion things in themselves, nobody\u0027s going to like them and it\u0027s not worth even trying. Or they end up trying SOOOO hard, overdoing it and looking like fakes, and that won\u0027t work either.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EHow I see it, you should \u0022be yourself\u0022 in a sense that you are confident. You recognise the good stuff you have and be proud of it. You don\u0027t rush to change EVERYTHING about you only because some alpha guy seems to be doing it differently. (\u0022I\u0027m wearing blue shirts and that cool guy there is wearing black ones and he\u0027s getting women... My shirts must suck. Gotta replace them!\u0022) Instead, you should have the courage to do some things your own way - IF they are good things, of course. Sometimes it\u0027s hard to tell.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESome guys, I feel, really think too little of themselves. I have a male friend (I\u0027m a woman myself) who thinks he\u0027s too thin and not \u0022manly\u0022 enough as he doesn\u0027t have big muscles. Should he go to the gym and try to \u0022improve himself\u0022? Maybe he should, I don\u0027t know. But I feel he\u0027s very attractive and there\u0027s nothing wrong with his body. Many women like guys who are not so big and athletic, just like many men like women with B size boobs, even more than they like women with huge ones. My point is, whether he chooses to work out or not, I think his real problem is that he THINKS he sucks. That makes him shy with women, not talking to them, thinking like, \u0022they won\u0027t like me anyway\u0022. If, instead, he would be like \u0022Well, there are women who love guys JUST like me, let\u0027s go get them\u0022, I\u0027m sure he would succeed.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EEven when you do have obvious faults, there\u0027s a point in \u0022being yourself\u0022, in a sense that you recognise your faults and don\u0027t panic. :) Don\u0027t be ashamed of them, don\u0027t get intimidated by them and don\u0027t desperately try to hide them and be somebody else. Instead, be cool. The message you\u0027re giving to other people should be: \u0022I know I have these faults but it\u0027s ok. I\u0027m working on them.\u0022 This is my idea of accepting oneself. It doesn\u0027t mean you should suck for the rest of your life. :)\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo... When I\u0027ve told people to \u0022be themselves\u0022, maybe I should have said \u0022be confident\u0022, or what?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThanks for the interesting post, by the way.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/400\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-407\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/407#comment-407\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/407#comment-407\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ERe: Oops... Now I\u0026#039;m feeling\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Tuesday, 9 August 2011  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/400#comment-400\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHi Kaisa,\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYeah, generally you want to stay away from any kind of clich\u00e9 advice, just because people stop \u0022hearing\u0022 clich\u00e9s or end up misinterpreting them to mean something else a great deal of the time. So, when most guys hear, \u0022Just be yourself,\u0022 they think, \u0022Oh, great! All I have to do is go be exactly the same way I always am, and women will like me!\u0022\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnd then it doesn\u0027t go so swell and they feel a little lost and confused at why being themselves wasn\u0027t enough.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYour understanding of \u0022be yourself\u0022 is perfectly sound -- the guy who does best with women really IS himself, and is much more in touch with his real personality usually than most men are. People can sense genuineness, and they tend to respond to it enthusiastically.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EUnfortunately, when you tell most guys to be themselves, they\u0027ve spent so much time wrapping their \u003Ci\u003Ereal\u003C\/i\u003E selves up in so many appearances and defense mechanisms that the appearances and defense mechanisms are what people see. That\u0027s stuff like cynicism, clique-ishness, one-sided opinions, etc., that are much more for protection or group affiliation than they are a part of that person\u0027s actual self -- but people come to identify themselves through those things and think that that\u0027s what they ought to show off when they\u0027re told to \u0022be themselves.\u0022\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EMaybe instead of saying \u0022be yourself,\u0022 you might say, \u0022be cool, don\u0027t come off like you\u0027re trying to impress or be fake at all, but at the same time make sure you\u0027re getting to know about her dreams and motivations and that you\u0027re moving things forward, because women aren\u0027t going to make the moves themselves.\u0022\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf you want quick advice to give to guy pals, that\u0027s probably some of the best 5-second advice you can give!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ECheers,\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/407\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-670\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/670#comment-670\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/670#comment-670\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EWhy is it that our fathers\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Monday, 26 September 2011  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EWhy is it that our fathers (well, not mine, he isnt Western) and grandfathers seemed to be born naturally able to find women and partners? What has changed in society that is creating legions of men unable to do what seemed to be a natural male trait? What caused this \u0027feel good\u0027 Political Correctness crap?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/670\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-676\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/676#comment-676\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/676#comment-676\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EMy Hypothesis would be:\n1.\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Tuesday, 27 September 2011  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/670#comment-670\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EMy Hypothesis would be:\u003Cbr \/\u003E\n1. Feminism and its effects. Men can no longer be like their grandfathers and grand-grandfathers and still hope to be successfull since the very idea of being a man has changed over the last decades. (Though at the same time people still cling to the old chliches.)\u003Cbr \/\u003E\n2. Free choice of partners. Maybe not even 100 hundred years ago many societies would\u0027ve some sort of arranged marriages and such, which made looking for partners unnecessary. But since the increasing freedom during the 20th century people had to start looking for partners all by themselves which to some extent is a rather new concept. (Casanova and suchlike only looked for affairs and flings and such. But seriously, how many poor farmers etc. had even the chance or time to look for partners or flings?)\u003Cbr \/\u003E\n3. Hollywood. One of the worst brainwashing-mechanisms in postwar media, imho. We\u0027re infused with all those fake ideas about how love and relationships should work, but in reality it hardly ever (or never) works out like in those movies. Especially women seem to be affected by these made-up ideas of romance and \u0022the one\u0022 and all that crap. As a result their expectations towards dating and mating changed over time and both men and women still struggle with it. \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EJust a few spontaneous ideas.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/676\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-695\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/695#comment-695\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/695#comment-695\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ERe: Why we\u0026#039;ve got political correctness\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Tuesday, 27 September 2011  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/670#comment-670\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EI think this is deserving of a post in and of its own right, as it\u0027s a pretty interesting topic and it isn\u0027t, as far as I can tell, quite what you might think. I\u0027ll get that one up shortly.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/695\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-2036\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/2036#comment-2036\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Omer\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Omer\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Omer\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Omer\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/2036#comment-2036\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EI disagree\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EOmer (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 14 June 2012  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHello,\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYou completely misunderstood the term \u0027just be yourself\u0027. It\u0027s an imperative, not a descriptive sentence. And you consider it as if it were a sentence that tells you not to do anything, just to stay the way you are. And that would be a terrible advice most of the time, since people are usually \u0022not themselves\u0022, especially with girls.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nIn my honest opinion, \u0022just be yourself\u0022 means more or less \u0022be authentic\u0022, and it\u0027s not \u0022just\u0022 actually, because it\u0027s not simple. It\u0027s very difficult and takes a lot of time and practce. It is about self-improvement here, to discover what you really want at all times and all costs. I believe that people who do so, barely need any social advice, maybe just some tips here and there. They are being themselves\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u0027m sorry for my English, and I would be really happy to listen to replies\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/2036\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-4491\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/4491#comment-4491\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/4491#comment-4491\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003E\u0026quot;Be yourself\u0026quot; is great advice\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Friday, 23 November 2012  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003E\u0022Be yourself\u0022 is great advice *for the moment* when you\u0027re with a girl. Being congruent\u2014not putting up a show; thoughts, words and actions aligned)\u2014is one of the defining factors in pickup.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAs a lifestyle advice, it\u0027s bad. Men have been socially conditioned to beliefs that serve the female imperative and are counterproductive to getting laid.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/4491\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-4791\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/4791#comment-4791\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Garrett\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Garrett\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Garrett\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Garrett\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/4791#comment-4791\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EChase, I really need your help with this man!\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EGarrett (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Friday, 30 November 2012  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHey Chase!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo I\u0027ll break things down for you. I follow your blog quite often, and I think you have a lot of logical and great applicable advice for your followers. I came across this post though and it really bothered me....\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe thing is, I\u0027m a young guy, and I\u0027m honestly not looking to have sex with a girl right away. I\u0027m down with making out with her and all that good stuff, but due to my religious beliefs and my morals, it feels wrong. Chase, I honestly did look at myself and think \u0022Are you just saying that because you can\u0027t get girls to sleep with you?\u0022 Honestly though, I\u0027m not being a victim here because I know that\u0027s not what I want, regardless of if I could get with a girl in one night or not, it\u0027s sincerely just not my thing. I\u0027d rather get to know a girl, make a move if I\u0027m interested, and build the relationship if it\u0027s what we both want.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo what I\u0027m wondering is, if I don\u0027t sleep with the girl, what\u0027s the deal? Am I always going to be relegated to the \u0027boyfriend\u0027 who has to work hard in order to get what I want?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAlso, about being yourself, I think you should be yourself to an extent, and this is why I disagree with you. If you aren\u0027t yourself, how are you going to be comfortable knowing that you are basically \u0027acting\u0027 all the time and lying to everyone you meet? I think constant self improvement is essential to becoming the best person you can be, and I\u0027ve been incorporating what you\u0027re saying in your blog into my life. I feel like it works, but recently I wasn\u0027t being myself at all, I would have be in \u0027acting mode\u0027 and would eventually cave and throw emotional bombs on girls because I felt like I was manipulating them. It just wasn\u0027t my thing man.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe thing is, I like to incorporate what you teach, but I don\u0027t want to completely change who I am to attract women. What\u0027s your view on this? Do you see my side of the argument, because from my standpoint it feels wrong because you are essentially manipulating people\u0027s emotions in order to get what you want. I know most girls want the badboy and don\u0027t appreciate the nice guys, but why not be a mix of both? Just be yourself, don\u0027t be the \u0027shopping buddy\u0027 and don\u0027t be a jerk? Because naturally, I\u0027m a blend of both. I want to get better with girls, and get high quality girls, but I don\u0027t want to manipulate them and sleep with them on the first night.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI may have misinterpreted things to an extreme level, but I\u0027m looking forward to your views on this Chase; it will probably really help myself as well as others improve on our game!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThanks,\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nGarrett\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/4791\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-4793\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/4793#comment-4793\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/4793#comment-4793\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ESociety\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Friday, 30 November 2012  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/4791#comment-4791\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHey Garrette\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI wrote out an elaborate response to this with many questions, I felt like I came off like a psychopathic cult leader trying to get his members to question reality.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe truth is, you need to ask yourself.. Why do you feel guilty for indulging? Is this guilt great enough that it\u0027s holding you back? My friend who has religious parents used to be like this, but as he became more independent and enjoying life more.. he stopped feeling guilty. He became happier and less depressed. He tells me he still feels that way watching porn but he\u0027s dating multiple girls and a stripper at the moment.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EA good thing to think about is that often people with addictions do things that they regret. So obese people eating, and then feeling guilty about it. Alcoholics who like drinking but feel guilty about it. The problem here is that you\u0027re letting society telling you what you should think, and thus feeling guilty like my friend. This often perpetuates the problem, making them indulge more and then feeling even more guilty about it. Then depression, and more indulgence. Etc.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYou seem to enjoy being around women, so why let society limit you? Is God going to hate you for doing what you love? Seems like rubbish to me\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESame thing goes for the word you used, \u0022manipulation\u0022. It has such a negative connotation, and often is used as a label. Society and people do this to stop others from deviating from the norm. To hold us back. So you may want to think about why exactly you use that word so much.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAlso, the whole part about \u0022being one\u0027s self\u0022. Honestly I see this more in the younger population, so your opinions on this will probably change by the time you get older (but then it will be too late).. and well.. I can\u0027t say many people would appreciate me crying all the time and tossing food everywhere like when I was a toddler.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E*shrugs*\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E- Eric\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/4793\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-4811\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/4811#comment-4811\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Garrett\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Garrett\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Garrett\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Garrett\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/4811#comment-4811\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EResponding to Anon\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EGarrett (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Saturday, 1 December 2012  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHey Eric,\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIn terms of the guilt... my parents aren\u0027t religious at all, and they don\u0027t push me to believe in anything. Going to Catholic School and taking religious courses, my morals have somewhat deviated from what they were before. So it\u0027s basically my own choice man. I don\u0027t feel guilty about it.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe thing is, I\u0027m not really interested in having sex with some random girl that I meet off the street. I\u0027ll give you this though... if the girl was really hot, had a killer personality, would benefit me, and I knew if I didn\u0027t do it she would leave, then yeah I would probably go for it to be honest. \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase did raise a good point in one of his articles though, about the Doctor who was kissing the girl here and there, vs. the guy who took the girl home right away. I think it depends on a few factors though, like how good your game is, and the morals of the girl.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI enjoy being around women, and want to get better game. I feel I may have misinterpreted the whole \u0027be yourself\u0027 mentality. I believe that people should continuously work on and improve themselves, and when something goes wrong, look at themselves first before blaming others, because that\u0027s how you grow and truly learn from your mistakes. I hate it when I\u0027m talking to someone and I say \u0022You know what, I think we were both at fault, I shouldn\u0027t have hurt your feelings.\u0022 Then they comeback and say, \u0022No, you were at fault, I didn\u0027t do anything.\u0022 Failing to recognize one\u0027s faults really inhibits growth.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhen I read your post, Eric, I really considered your point of view. I don\u0027t think it applies to me though in all honesty. In my opinion, society doesn\u0027t do much to tell guys not to have sex, if anything, it\u0027s typically encouraged. I think you are referring to society\u0027s point of view on girls having sex, because girls who go around doing it may develop a bad reputation. If I went around having sex, I\u0027d probably develop a better reputation than I have now, although I\u0027d prefer to better my reputation in different ways.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThanks for the input Eric,\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nGarrett\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/4811\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-6175\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/6175#comment-6175\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Michael Makovi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Michael Makovi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Michael Makovi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Michael Makovi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/6175#comment-6175\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ESelf-improvement. But what if there\u0026#039;s nothing \u0026quot;wrong\u0026quot; with you?\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EMichael Makovi (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Friday, 11 January 2013  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EI arrived here from \u003Ca href=\u0022http:\/\/www.frumsatire.net\/2013\/01\/09\/the-nerdiest-shidduch-resume-ive-ever-seen\/#comment-171224\u0022\u003Ehere\u003C\/a\u003E.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo this article speaks of self-improvement. Well-taken. But what if there\u0027s nothing \u0022wrong\u0022 with you? Well, obviously, I mean relatively, because nobody is perfect. \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EFor example, a Star Trek nerd might have less success in picking up women than a non-nerd. But there\u0027s nothing \u0022wrong\u0022 with being a nerd. So why should he have to abandon his nerd-dom in the name of \u0022self-improvement\u0022?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EFurthermore, even if he successfully ceases to be a nerd, my guess is that the utility he will derive from greater dating success, will be less than the disutility of his no longer having the satisfaction of being true to himself. In other words, there is utility to be had from both being true to oneself, and from romantic associations. Where these two utilities conflict, one must decide which one is greater. \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOn top of that, if you are true to yourself, I will wager that eventually, you will find someone. It may take longer for the Star Trek nerd than for the jock, but sooner or later, the Star Trek nerd will succeed as well. So it\u0027s a simple matter of time-preference (time horizon): the nerd can make himself into a jock and thereby acquire a romantic partner sooner, but all he has done is bring a future utility closer to the present. This is indeed valuable (present goods are more valuable than future goods). But in the process, the nerd has lost the utility of being true to himself. He has entirely lost one utility (being a nerd, true to himself), and merely brought a future utility (romantic partnership) closer to the present. Ultimately, it will depend on his personal time preference (his own personal rate of discounting the value of the future relative to the present, i.e. his own degree of patience or impatience).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAssuming a low enough time preference (i.e. a high degree of patience and willingness to wait), then the best strategy would seem to be to be oneself, and be willing to wait. The nerd, rather than become a jock and gain a romantic partner today at the cost of his satisfaction of being a nerd, ought to remain a nerd and retain that satisfaction, and wait another five or ten years for a romantic partner.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnd the truer he is to himself, the sooner he will find someone who appreciates him for who he is. Assuming a general strategy of being true to oneself, then any divergence away from this will actually delay gratification by making it more difficult for his would-be other to find him. The nerdier a nerd is, the faster another nerd will find him. The more a Star Trek nerd talks about Star Trek, the sooner he will find another Star Trek nerd. Cf. OKTrends, \u003Ca href=\u0022http:\/\/blog.okcupid.com\/index.php\/the-mathematics-of-beauty\/\u0022\u003EThe Mathematics of Beauty\u003C\/a\u003E: \u0022We now have mathematical evidence that minimizing your \u0022flaws\u0022 is the opposite of what you should do.\u0022\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo ultimately, what it comes down to is, one must evaluate one\u0027s own respective utilities for being oneself, for having a romantic partner, and for enduring or not enduring the passage of time. One\u0027s behavior ought to be a function of these three variables.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/6175\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-8020\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/8020#comment-8020\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Garrett\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Garrett\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Garrett\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Garrett\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/8020#comment-8020\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EBe yourself\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EGarrett (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 24 March 2013  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EAfter spending a while off of this site, I\u0027ve actually come to disagree with everything on here. The reason why is because yes you can change who you are and yes what this site advocates does work, but you really have to sit down and think about what you want. Maybe some people are satisfied living an average lifestyle. How is studying for a test not being yourself? This post is extreme in the fact that it says you can\u0027t be yourself and have the lifestyle you want. I can study for law school and still be myself? I can eat healthier and still be myself? Regardless, even if you meet a girl with the methods on this site, what are the odds of finding someone who you can just hangout with, bond with, be entirely authentic with and enjoy spending time with? I see several married couples, including my parents, who enjoy spending time with each other because they like who the person is both inside and out. Chase, maybe that girl left you after you spent boatloads of time on her, but did you ever really think that maybe she\u0027s just not right for you? Sleeping with girls and toying with their emotions is wrong in my opinion, this site is way too complex regardless of intelligence, and people need to follow their heart as opposed to acting like robots to attract women. I\u0027m sure you become natural as you change your behavior, but it\u0027s completely unnecessary, unnatural and unrealistic. You were born the way you are for a reason, why change yourself so that someone who wouldn\u0027t like you for who you are naturally would suddenly start liking you because of the changes you\u0027ve made? It\u0027s complex, and yes I know this site works, I spent half a year and endless hours trying to change my behavior\/appearance. It worked, but I wasn\u0027t finding the true bond that you can only find if you naturally just be yourself, follow what you want to do, and with time, wait for the girl of your dreams to come around when you least expect it, you just have to have faith and chill out :p. Balance is key here, and if you\u0027re doing nothing to take care of yourself, that should probably concern you. To each his own though, if guys are happy living like that it\u0027s fine, but you don\u0027t have to go to the other extreme and spend all you\u0027re time worrying about improvement. It\u0027s not all or nothing, look towards the middle of the spectrum, take care of yourself if you want, and eventually you\u0027ll run into your dream girl who likes you for who you naturally are :).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EGarrett \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/8020\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-8734\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/8734#comment-8734\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chan\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chan\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chan\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chan\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/8734#comment-8734\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003Eyes, accept and be yourself!\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChan (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 2 May 2013  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EAmen to the responders who say \u0022accept and be yourself\u0022. Any kind push for a change reflects an assumption that as you are \u0022is not okay\u0022 and you should change. Actually this is a very deeply ingrained belief in the Western mind (we\u0027re all flawed in some way and we should all \u0022improve\u0022 and \u0022change\u0022 to something better). \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut that\u0027s a lie. We\u0027re perfectly okay and deserve to be accepted and loved as we are -- with all our imperfections!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ENow if you\u0027re drinking for the entire day, lying on the couch eating chips, watching television, this self destructive behavior reflects not your self-love and self-acceptance but more likely self-hate. You probably don\u0027t accept yourself, so you\u0027re self destructive.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo the solution paradoxically is in greater self love and self acceptance -- without the need for any kind of great self improvement projects. If we\u0027re able to achieve that, we\u0027ll be able to find  and develop deep loving relationships too.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe book \u0022Radical Acceptance\u0022 helped me in this area a lot in case you like this line of thought and find it helpful. \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/8734\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-11669\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/11669#comment-11669\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/david-longhair\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/picture-4768_0.jpg\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022David Longhair\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022David Longhair\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/picture-4768_0.jpg\u0022 alt=\u0022David Longhair\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022David Longhair\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/11669#comment-11669\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EI feel I have to comment on this\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/david-longhair\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/david-longhair\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EDavid Longhair\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Tuesday, 23 July 2013  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EChase, I think you being overtly critical of the saying \u0022Just be yourself\u0022. Of course if this means - being a slob, eating whatever junk food you want, playing computer games 24\/7, masturbating to porn when you aren\u0027t playing computer games, and dressing whatever crap you can find - then yes, of course that is detrimental.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut we are also individuals with different personalities. I like unique things, I like pretty things, I collect art and fine porcelain. I don\u0027t like to watch sport and I couldn\u0027t give a rats arse who won the World Series, the Grand Slam, or the World Cup. Recently my friend told me off and said I was being too eccentric and told me to hide the fact that I have a metrosexual side. But then what? I want to meet intelligent girls I want to fuck intelligent girls who like what I like.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u0027ve recently removed several females from my facebook list - why? Because they really didn\u0027t give a damn about me. They were simply after a Mr. Perfect - someone who had a well paying job, drove a good car, went to the right Uni - did the right degree, and said the right things at gatherings - and basically be their bitch - fuck that. \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/11669\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-11927\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/11927#comment-11927\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Alex Adieu\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Alex Adieu\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Alex Adieu\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Alex Adieu\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/11927#comment-11927\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EI REALLY needed to hear this...\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAlex Adieu (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Monday, 29 July 2013  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EThank you for writing this.  It is even worse when everyone around you tells you to \u0022just be yourself\u0022 when you have a mental disability.  Although I act normal enough that no one suspects it, I am missing social filters.  This used to make me so angry when people would tell me to \u0022just be myself\u0022 because I knew it was bullshit.  Me just being myself results in failure because of missing social filters.  At times it\u0027s like I can do no wrong, at other times it\u0027s like I can do no right-socially.  Sometimes only the \u0022right\u0022 things are coming out of my mouth and other times nothing \u0022right\u0022 is coming out of my mouth(endless debates about religion with hot women, talking about my non existent sex life, complaining, etc etc and I won\u0027t realize I\u0027m doing it till after the fact).  I also think that this idea of \u0022just be yourself\u0022 came from romantic delusions and religion(after all it is all about \u0022destiny\u0022 or the \u0022will\u0022 of whatever imaginary friend strokes people\u0027s ego and how dare the rest of us have the audacity to trample on these moronic irresponsible ideas that only sheep buy into).  I have been feeling down lately and almost like giving up despite being so close to changing my behavior(only asking questions when around women without creeping them out for instance as opposed to talking about me) due to more or less having a diagnosis of Aspergers(even though I\u0027m not clumsy and I look normal, most women would consider me to look like a male model but my issues have always made sex difficult although I have been engaged before).  I realize if I don\u0027t change, I don\u0027t get the smoking hot woman.  The type of woman I lust for I won\u0027t find at a Star Trek convention most likely aside from Jeri Ryan lol(despite my obsession with Star Trek).  How many people have condemned me for wanting to change myself like I am killing someone or doing something that is a \u0022mortal sin\u0022.  All I can say to them is that if they want to be sheep, baaaaaahhhhh, baaaaahhhhh, living in their double standards(concerning sex, want to change personality issues you might as well be Hitler, but if it was the SAME personality issues hitting their wallet-preventing them from getting jobs due to \u0022just being themselves\u0022 at a job interview-they would jump through burning hoops going to the ends of the earth to change the SAME things, hypocrisy at its finest), they want to be failures and not run their life, piss on them.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/11927\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-12169\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/12169#comment-12169\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022lucifer7\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022lucifer7\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022lucifer7\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022lucifer7\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/12169#comment-12169\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003E\u0026quot;improve\/work\u0026quot; VS \u0026quot;work to live\/enjoy life\u0026quot;\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003Elucifer7 (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 4 August 2013  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003ELiked the gist of the article, but my Southern European roots tell me that it seems a bit like the classical American clich\u00e8 \u0022work hard to get what you want\u0022.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYes, of course, improve, but should you be making that your ULTIMATE goal?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EDo you know what\u0027s one of the most common regrets people have in their last day?\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nHaving worked too much.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf your ultimate goal is always improving, when will you stop to catch your breath, like yourself the way you are -which IS important to be happy- and... Enjoy life? \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo yes, improve, but also learn to like yourself even *before* you reach those goals of improvement and no matter whether or not you\u0027ll reach your goals.... Learn to enjoy life anyway, that\u0027s what really matters in the end.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Elucio \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/12169\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-14202\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/14202#comment-14202\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Toni\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Toni\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Toni\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Toni\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/14202#comment-14202\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ETotally Agree with this.. \u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EToni (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 26 September 2013  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EI think people who say \u0022Just be yourself\u0022 meant that they just need to be themselves when they are actually on the date itself. Something like, relax or something. ... And don\u0027t be a fake... (I\u0027m not good with trying to justify it because being a fake actually worked for the better for me) \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnyway I totally agree with the idea of don\u0027t just be yourself and make yourself (as long as the direction is for the better version though) \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI don\u0027t know what else to put in this box since I already expressed my thoughts on my blog. (I don\u0027t usually expose my blog but heck, here\u0027s the link if you want to hear my thoughts about your article) \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022http:\/\/quarterlifecrisisneverends.blogspot.com\/2013\/09\/be-yourself-turns-out-to-be-worst-advice.html\u0022\u003Ehttp:\/\/quarterlifecrisisneverends.blogspot.com\/2013\/09\/be-yourself-turns...\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf you don\u0027t read it, it\u0027s fine too. Lol just wanted to comment here that I agree with the whole perspective of becoming a better person because I also was the type of girl before who had a mentality of saying \u0022I don\u0027t need them in my life\u0022 everytime a person ends up hating me. On the other hand, I think that line is actually just a defense mechanism to make myself feel better and to tell myself I don\u0027t need to change anything about me. But deep inside I knew that I need to change some parts of my personality and behavior. I was just probably in the \u0022indenial\u0022 stage. \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EDon\u0027t know if my comment made any sense. Sorry. I hope it did. \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/14202\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-16981\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/16981#comment-16981\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/16981#comment-16981\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003E\u0026quot;Kinda\u0026quot; agree \u0026amp; disagree\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Friday, 15 November 2013  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EI get your point of wanting to improve oneself. It\u0027s always great to work towards improving your education, health, friendships, confidence, etc. I think the whole \u0022be yourself\u0022 is meant more to mean \u0022do whatever makes YOU happy\u0022. If you are unhappy with your health, then you should eat healthier and exercise more often. If you are unhappy with your career, then you should try to find another that does make you happy. If you are unhappy with your anger issues, then you should try to control the emotions that make you unhappy. Self-improvement is something we should all strive for in one way or another. \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut that doesn\u0027t mean that you should do things just so other people will like you better. If you are naturally a nice and compassionate person, you shouldn\u0027t treat people mean because you hear that some people prefer \u0022naughtiness\u0022. Because it will come across as insincere and make you feel uncomfortable as well. Same thing the other way. If you enjoy being the life of the party and outgoing, you shouldn\u0027t hold back because people classify you as \u0022loud and obnoxious\u0022.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBeing yourself should be taken as \u0022doing things that make you feel happier and proud of yourself\u0022 not just for the purpose of influencing other people\u0027s opinions. That will come naturally when they see you trying to become a better you. There will always be people that love and care for you no matter your highs and lows. But there will also always be people that don\u0027t like you no matter what you do. So being yourself is great advice in that sense because if you try to be someone you\u0027re not just to make people like you, then you will always feel inadequate. The only thing we can really control in this life is our happiness. \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EHopefully this helps. :)\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/16981\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-38929\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/38929#comment-38929\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022learner419\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022learner419\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022learner419\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022learner419\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/38929#comment-38929\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003Eon going with the flow and being yourself\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003Elearner419 (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 27 November 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003Ethanks for the astute and frank observations, Chase.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nIt makes me recall something a female teacher (I went to a co-ed school) graciously told a huddle of her final year studes about the end of our last school year. This youngish married woman  opined: \u0022you worry too much about dating, looks, attraction, socializing  and so on. Marriage, romance, if you want it, is there waiting.  Just let it happen.\u0022 Not really knowing better, and distrusting  my own intuition, I was willing to believe  those sage words coming from someone who was so obviously wiser (I guess she was all of 30!) Besides, whatever, it just felt good to listen to teacher\u0027s homily. I secretly admonished myself for being blind to the soothing truisms .\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nThe worst aspect of this type of advice is that it  comforts the lazy person for being passive. It is only by seeing that the advice such as \u0027go with the flow\u0027  doesn\u0027t work in other aspects of life- career and sport, for instance- that you learn to see through it.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nOne other point: if something doesn\u0027t work, don\u0027t keep repeating it. Telling me to be myself only keeps me in a rut of no escape.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nPersevere with self- improvement and self-mastery, not with repeating the same mistakes and the old mindset.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nBut the person who tells you \u0022just go with the flow and things will work out\u0022 will not foresee your further frustration and cares nothing about your outcomes.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nWhat happened to that teacher and her marriage I never got to know.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/38929\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-38969\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/38969#comment-38969\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022learner419\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022learner419\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022learner419\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022learner419\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/38969#comment-38969\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003Ewhat Oscar Wilde said\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003Elearner419 (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Friday, 28 November 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003E\u0022Being natural is just another pose,  and a rather irritating one at that. It is one\u0027s duty .... to be as artificial as possible.\u0022 (apologies for any inaccuracies)\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nProvocative words left by England\u0027s\u0027 most famous agent provocateur. But don\u0027t quote Mr Wilde unless you can speak with conviction. Or else you will only sound fake!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/38969\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-64901\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/64901#comment-64901\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/64901#comment-64901\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EJust Be Yourself\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Tuesday, 9 June 2015  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EJust be yourself.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nEver notice that the woman who is stating this may be wearing a push up bra, artificial nails, dyed hair, high heels, make up, false eye lashes, spanks to squeeze and lift her buns, glitter around her eyes, lipstick, and maybe even shoulder pads?\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nBut, she will tell you to just be yourself, because the general advise to men will make it easier for her to size up men and filter them out. Of course, you get her naked and you find out her tits aren\u0027t as big nor as firm as they appeared to be, and her ass isn\u0027t as tight and as firm as it appeared to be, and she is several inches shorter than she appeared to be, and without her makeup on she does not appear as attractive as you thought she was, and in the harsh light of morning her hair color appears to be quite unnatural. But damned if you didn\u0027t game her into bed, though. Time to down a beer and run. She fooled you into bed, and you did the same to her. Even match.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/64901\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-65573\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/65573#comment-65573\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022SBM\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022SBM\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022SBM\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022SBM\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/65573#comment-65573\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ETo sellout, or not to sellout?\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003ESBM (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Tuesday, 14 July 2015  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHere\u0027s something I\u0027ve been chewing over for a while now? Suppose, you have the metalhead (as in has long hair, wears band tees, etc.) wants to be more successful with women? Should he really sellout his style, start listening to rap, and dressing like a swagfag (as in cut the hair, ditch the band tees and replace all that with snapbacks, short, flippy hair, and shades) in order to be more attractive to women? Or just wait to meet a girl who is also into metal and likes guys with long hair? (Btw, these kinds of women who do exist are far and few between, and most of the ones I\u0027ve met, are either obese, have dominant and promiscuious personalities, or are never single.)\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/65573\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-65579\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/65579#comment-65579\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/franco\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-3879-1483064671.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Franco Lombardi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Franco Lombardi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-3879-1483064671.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Franco Lombardi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Franco Lombardi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/65579#comment-65579\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EYour Fashion Style Doesn\u0026#039;t Have to Represent Your Interests\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/franco\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/franco\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EFranco Lombardi\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Tuesday, 14 July 2015  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/65573#comment-65573\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003ESBM,\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI think the mistake that most guys make here is that they let a very particular passion (in this case, music) completely encompass who they are. The problem with that is that, unless you\u0027re a very successful musician in the metal scene, then you\u0027re basically just a \u0022kid\u0022 wearing a ton of t-shirts\/belts\/shoes\/etc. that represent an interest rather than a career, future, or mission.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EImagine if a kid who loves Dungeons \u0026amp; Dragons comes up and asks you the same question (i.e. \u0022hey, if I want to get better with women, should I stop wearing Dungeons \u0026amp; Dragons t-shirts?\u0022) You\u0027d probably say, \u0022Umm... definitely,\u0022 right? That\u0027s a slightly more extreme example, but it\u0027s the same thing here.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf you want to get higher quality women, you have to have a fashion style that is actually attractive to them. And you\u0027ll occasionally be surprised how there are some women out there who love hard rock or metal but don\u0027t dress in a way that indicates that at all. That\u0027s because these women understand that their appearance affects what type of men will approach them, and if they don\u0027t want \u0022kids\u0022 approaching them, then they won\u0027t dress in a way that draws them in. So you can still be the sophisticated guy who dresses well and displays good fashion, but you also have a strong passion for metal music.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EEDIT: If you\u0027re \u003Cem\u003Egoing\u003C\/em\u003E to a live metal concert, then yeah, you can probably bust out your band tee and torn jeans because the expectation is that everyone will be dressed that way.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOf course, the other option is to actually \u003Cem\u003Ebe\u003C\/em\u003E in a metal band and work toward a musical career. At least your fashion is then congruent with your goals, and that is why \u0022rock stars\u0022 usually have a good choice of women; their music isn\u0027t just one of their passions, but it is also their career and their \u0022mission\u0022 as well.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E- Franco\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/65579\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-66611\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/66611#comment-66611\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/66611#comment-66611\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EThis article fails so hard; i\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Friday, 4 September 2015  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EThis article fails so hard; i strongly advise anyone to not listen to this; i used to be in a relationship where i wasnt being myself; it was torture ! There were so many things i wanted to say but i couldnt say because i was worried about what my girlfriend would say if i showed my true self! Yes i agree that you need to progress...you dont stay static in one spot forever....but say you grow your knowledge innnn, geeky subjects, like aliens? And say you grow a passion for alien topics....but you dont discuss aliens with your girlfriend because youre afraid of showing your true colors? Its fuckin mental torture man. He progressed but he cant even express his progression! Dont listen to this article!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/66611\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-66638\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/66638#comment-66638\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/franco\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-3879-1483064671.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Franco Lombardi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Franco Lombardi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-3879-1483064671.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Franco Lombardi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Franco Lombardi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/66638#comment-66638\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003E...What?\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/franco\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/franco\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EFranco Lombardi\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Friday, 4 September 2015  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/66611#comment-66611\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EAnon,\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYou either didn\u0027t read the article, or you didn\u0027t understand the article. \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EEither way, this comment was not helpful as you did not provide any empirical evidence as to why we should not listen to this article and just \u0022be ourselves\u0022 other than you making a reference to a small anecdote of when you were apparently terrified of talking to your own girlfriend.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EPlease stick to providing useful comments on here.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E- Franco\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/66638\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-86604\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/86604#comment-86604\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Nobody\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Nobody\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Nobody\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Nobody\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/86604#comment-86604\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EOf course this is bad advice.\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003ENobody (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 17 May 2018  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EOf course this is bad advice.  It\u0027s feminine advice.  Just submit rather than trying to dominate.  This is the philosophy of rolling over and taking it because the invaders will kill you otherwise; this is written into female genetics, men should know better.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nI find your disdain for trying to win converts while running a site like this ironic and a holdover of this type of thinking.  Women try to lone wolf while pretending to be friends.  Men dominate and add their vanquished opponents to their ranks (this is how rockefeller conquered the world by the way).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/86604\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-91591\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/91591#comment-91591\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022stefqwerty\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022stefqwerty\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022stefqwerty\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022stefqwerty\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/91591#comment-91591\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003Ewhat? how does improving\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003Estefqwerty (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 28 October 2021  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/just-be-yourself-worst-dating-advice-known-man\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/86604#comment-86604\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003Ewhat? how does improving oneself means \u0026quot;submitting\u0026quot;, this makes no sense.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nYou can be yourself and have success and dominate, the caveat is that most of the time your definition of yourself for that would have to be \u0026quot;I am someone who is constantly improving\u0026quot;.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/432\/91591\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/dev\u003E\u003C\/dev\u003E\u003Cdev class=\u0022comment-form ajax-comment-form\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv id=\u0022comments\u0022 class=\u0022comment-wrapper\u0022\u003E\n  \n  \n      \u003Ch4 class=\u0022title comment-form\u0022\u003ELeave a Comment\u003C\/h4\u003E\n    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for=\u0022edit-notify\u0022\u003E\u003Cinput type=\u0022checkbox\u0022 id=\u0022edit-notify\u0022 name=\u0022notify\u0022 value=\u00221\u0022 class=\u0022form-checkbox\u0022 \/\u003ENotify me when new comments are posted\u003C\/label\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv id=\u0022edit-notify-type\u0022 class=\u0022form-radios\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022form-item form-item-notify-type form-type-radio radio\u0022\u003E \u003Clabel class=\u0022control-label\u0022 for=\u0022edit-notify-type-1\u0022\u003E\u003Cinput type=\u0022radio\u0022 id=\u0022edit-notify-type-1\u0022 name=\u0022notify_type\u0022 value=\u00221\u0022 checked=\u0022checked\u0022 class=\u0022form-radio\u0022 \/\u003EAll comments\u003C\/label\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022form-item form-item-notify-type form-type-radio radio\u0022\u003E \u003Clabel class=\u0022control-label\u0022 for=\u0022edit-notify-type-2\u0022\u003E\u003Cinput type=\u0022radio\u0022 id=\u0022edit-notify-type-2\u0022 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