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id=\u0022comment-88684\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88684#comment-88684\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/user\/23888\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-23888-1584430292.jpg\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Zanardi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Zanardi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-23888-1584430292.jpg\u0022 alt=\u0022Zanardi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Zanardi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88684#comment-88684\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EGuilty\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/user\/23888\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/user\/23888\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EZanardi\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Monday, 22 July 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/you-can-learn-first-you-must-deprogram-unhelpful-beliefs\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003E\nA man thinks if a woman\u00a0\u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/ultimate-get-girls-dance-floors-guide-handling-resistance\u0022\u003E\u003Cstrong\u003Eresists you at all\u003C\/strong\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E, it means she isn\u0027t interested, and you should stop all pursuit of her\n\u003C\/p\u003E\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EGuilty as charged. In process of deprogramming.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3040\/88684\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88687\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88687#comment-88687\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Ben\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Ben\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Ben\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Ben\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88687#comment-88687\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ELeaving behind unhelpful beliefs\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EBen (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Tuesday, 23 July 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/you-can-learn-first-you-must-deprogram-unhelpful-beliefs\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EChase so if I want to eradicate these harmful beliefs of me thinking that I can\u0027t get women because I have eczema,scars,i\u0027m an awkward lover,not a sexy guy,have a soft voice what\u0027s more important to getting rid of it? To stop being a bitch and just leave my house to go approach girls even if I feel depressed,incompetent, or just like shit until the concerns that I have with women\u00a0go away? Or do I really have to adopt the right\u00a0mental mindset in order to be able to get girls? I hate feeling this way and I know I have the potential to do good with girls because I belief wholeheartedly in everything you guys teach at this site regarding dating and women. I guess i\u0027m the aware,unwilling guy you mentioned but not cause I think nothing works or it\u0027s wrong.It\u0027s more because I think I can\u0027t do it because of those insecurities I mentioned earlier which really eat at me.\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3040\/88687\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88692\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88692#comment-88692\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/user\/23888\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-23888-1584430292.jpg\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Zanardi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Zanardi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-23888-1584430292.jpg\u0022 alt=\u0022Zanardi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Zanardi\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88692#comment-88692\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ETo stop being a bitch and\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/user\/23888\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/user\/23888\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EZanardi\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Wednesday, 24 July 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/you-can-learn-first-you-must-deprogram-unhelpful-beliefs\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/88687#comment-88687\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003E\nTo stop being a bitch and just leave my house to go approach girls even if I feel depressed,incompetent\n\u003C\/p\u003E\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThis. Meanwhile you work on fixing your flaws.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3040\/88692\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88815\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88815#comment-88815\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88815#comment-88815\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EGetting Over Body Issues\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Saturday, 7 September 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/you-can-learn-first-you-must-deprogram-unhelpful-beliefs\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/88692#comment-88692\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EBen-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EJust to +1 this, but once you push yourself out and get a little success, it lets you rewrite your mental model. You say \u0022Oh, that\u0027s funny. That girl liked me even though I have these scars.\u0022 Then next you say \u0022Wow, that girl saw me naked and she didn\u0027t even object, we just had sex. Maybe she didn\u0027t notice?\u0022 Then later on you say \u0022I\u0027ve had a few really beautiful girlfriends now who didn\u0027t even pay attention to these things about my body I thought were just total deal breakers. Are these chicks weird or have I been worried about stuff many girls don\u0027t care about?\u0022\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnd then eventually you reach a point where you maybe still aren\u0027t a huge fan of whatever it is you don\u0027t like about your body but you don\u0027t think about it, worry about it, or care about it anymore at this point because time has taught you nobody else does.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYou may also want to check out \u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/how-deal-your-physical-insecurities\u0022\u003Ethis article on physical insecurities\u003C\/a\u003E by Darius.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EFor my money though, there\u0027s nothing that wipes away worries about trivialities (that feel like monumental issues at first) quite like success.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3040\/88815\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88702\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88702#comment-88702\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Lover\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Lover\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Lover\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Lover\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88702#comment-88702\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EEmbrace your insecurities.\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003ELover (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Monday, 29 July 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/you-can-learn-first-you-must-deprogram-unhelpful-beliefs\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/88687#comment-88687\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EEmbrace your insecurities. Learn to act despite them being there. Right now your truth is \u0022I can not get girls because of bad skin, awkward personality and soft voice\u0022. The only change you really need to make is to remove the \u0022not\u0022 from that sentence. But creating that new truth comes from experience, not from rolling your thumbs and waiting for yourself to think \u0022oh okay, now I can get girls\u0022. \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhen you have seen yourself sleep with a girl, that\u0027s when you gradually decrease the influence of your insecurities.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3040\/88702\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88690\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88690#comment-88690\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Xander\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Xander\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Xander\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Xander\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88690#comment-88690\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003Eresistance and the anatomy of failed first date\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EXander (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Wednesday, 24 July 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/you-can-learn-first-you-must-deprogram-unhelpful-beliefs\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EDear Chase,\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe same thing happens to me on dates over and over and simply I must ask you for advice. When you mentioned women resistance above in article I must ask you. Sorry if I bother you with too much questions but this kind of failure in seduction disturbs me the most. It is about failed first dates.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe pattern is always the same: to go on date with not good logistics because she does not want to invest in traveling to longer distances. Then she tries to push friendly or non-personal conversation. After I suceed with deep diving to turn conversation to be personal she only talkes about her life path and achivements and is not interesting for what I say or propose. Also does not care about my very honest compliments. Because I do not want to miss escalation windows, usually in the middle of conversation I propose moving to other location or sceduling the second date (due to better logistics) and she firmly declines. Again we continue conversation and I came out with the proposal of other kind of date (some activity together) and she again declines. Every time I try to use panoply of reasons but she is firm. Then after she finishes her story she usually gives me some excuse that has to leave and act dissapointed like I missed escalation window. Before leaving for the last time I try to propose one more date (like: lets grab some cheap and quality drinks these days, I know perfect place) and she usually tells me \u0022I am not in that mood, I won\u0027t be available for a long time\u0022. Then tells me \u0022good luck\u0022 and I never see her again.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EGood news are that I can get dates with girls I like and bad they usually end up like this. Last one happened yesterday. Is it possible that these girls just were not interested or available for me? Or I failed to enter to provider or lover category? Two called me bro in conversation so I guess I was friend zoned maybe even before the dates? Could some smooth persistance work after this kind of dates after some period of silence? I usually assume that these girls don\u0027t want me and simply cut contact and go to meet other girls. Please tell me your opinion about reasons and potential prevention of failed first dates.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAlso I have another problem with expressing lover qualities in larger cities where girls don\u0027t know about me. After I remove provider qualities a lot of girls don\u0027t see me worth at all and just go away. I use a lot of things to paint myself as lover but I am not there yet. Besides things I read on site what else could be done to increase odds for getting there? Sometimes I feel that some girls would accept me as a lover if I improved or said something but I do not know what.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EMy last question is not related with this article. I know some girls that friend zone every possible guy they meet. Nobody is good enough for them. And then they go to vacation and hook up with the first guy they meet in nightclub or hotel. Is there effective way for gaming this kind of girls? What causes such behaviour?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESorry for too many questions and bad English.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EXander\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3040\/88690\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88816\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88816#comment-88816\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88816#comment-88816\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EFriend Zoning First Dates\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Saturday, 7 September 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/you-can-learn-first-you-must-deprogram-unhelpful-beliefs\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/88690#comment-88690\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EXander-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWell that\u0027s no fun. It sounds like these girls are already showing up to the first date having mentally friend zoned you. So whatever it is that\u0027s going wrong, it goes all the way back to the initial approach.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI don\u0027t know what your approaches are like so I can\u0027t say what\u0027s wrong, per se. But usually when you see a pattern like this the problem comes down to vibe. You may want to (re)read these articles:\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cul\u003E\n\u003Cli\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/how-pick-girls-success-factor-part-i\u0022\u003ERicardus\u0027s X-factor series\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003Cli\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/constructing-your-sexy-vibe-and-making-girls-go-nuts\u0022\u003EConstructing your sexy vibe\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003Cli\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/how-be-sexy-man\u0022\u003EHow to be a sexy man\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003Cli\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/how-be-edgy-and-turn-women\u0022\u003EHow to be edgy\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003Cli\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/devil-may-care-attitude-what-it-how-get-it\u0022\u003EDevil-may-care vibe\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003Cli\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/3-flavors-sexy-brooding-smooth-and-talkative-vibes\u0022\u003E3 flavors of sexy\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003Cli\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/how-be-vulnerable-enchanting-and-alluring-women\u0022\u003EByronic flaws\u003C\/a\u003E (and \u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/tactics-tuesdays-spin-your-flaws-byronic-flaws\u0022\u003EByronic flaws part II\u003C\/a\u003E)\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EVibe is hard to nail down. But once it\u0027s nailed, friend zoning largely stops. You\u0027ll still get it sometimes (impossible to totally avoid... just because not every woman is susceptible to your charms, no matter how charming you may be). But a strong sexy vibe minimizes it.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAlso, make sure you\u0027re \u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/how-get-her-say-yes\u0022\u003Egetting compliance\u003C\/a\u003E from girls. Sexy vibe + poor compliance = \u0022this guy\u0027s a curiosity.\u0022 Mediocre vibe + excellet compliance = \u0022There\u0027s something about this guy I can\u0027t put my finger on. But he\u0027s compelling!\u0022 Getting a woman invested makes a big difference (of course, the better your vibe, the less work it is to get her to invest).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E(be careful too about throwing out provider value when your lover value isn\u0027t there yet. \u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/tactics-tuesdays-what-do-if-youre-not-sexy-yet\u0022\u003ESee this article\u003C\/a\u003E)\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOn this issue:\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003EMy last question is not related with this article. I know some girls that friend zone every possible guy they meet. Nobody is good enough for them. And then they go to vacation and hook up with the first guy they meet in nightclub or hotel. Is there effective way for gaming this kind of girls? What causes such behaviour?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYeah, I know the kind of girl you\u0027re talking about.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe best way to get them in my experience is just persistence. Keep talking to them, keep asking them out, keep pursuing them, keep putting the moves on them. Eventually you can wear them down.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe psychological profile seems to be \u0022No guy is good enough for me. But a girl needs a release! So when it\u0027s a vaction, it\u0027s okay. That guy would \u003Cem\u003Enever\u003C\/em\u003E be good enough for me back home! But he\u0027s sexy and it\u0027s vacation so I\u0027ll accept him.\u0022 It actually works the same way when persisting with them on their home turf: \u0022No guy is good enough for me. Bu a girl has needs! So, all right, fine, this guy has been after me for months, and he is just so persistent, and I don\u0027t think he measures up, but whatever, I\u0027m tired of being lonely, I know he\u0027s an okay guy so I guess I\u0027ll go along with it for a bit.\u0022\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe other thing you can always try is getting them to go along on some group travel with you. Then just hooking up with them on the trip. STA Travel or another travel package like that could work great. Only if the gal is really worth the effort though, or if you\u0027d travel otherwise and might as well make it a group thing and involve her. Try to find a package likely to have other hot girls too (in case it doesn\u0027t work out with the girl in question... or you need a few more girls to bounce some preselection off her with).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3040\/88816\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88705\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88705#comment-88705\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022SZ\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022SZ\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022SZ\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022SZ\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88705#comment-88705\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EQuestions \u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003ESZ (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Wednesday, 31 July 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/you-can-learn-first-you-must-deprogram-unhelpful-beliefs\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHey Chase,\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E1. when you said Indians live with their parents well into college, is it expected all students live on campus?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Ethis is a new one I never heard before, it sounded to me that it\u0027s normal that college students live on campus instead of at home.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Eis it like that from what you know? that it\u0027s expected to live on campus or in a student apartment?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Ewhat if they don\u0027t want debt?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E2. How do you maintain the momentum after you force the change after hitting rock bottom? this question is about how you did it as well.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Elike with the gym, music, girls, ball, etc.\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Ehow did you maintain the momentum that you didn\u0027t have before to keep doing this new thing you haven\u0027t done?\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Eif a person is the opposite of hard working, how does he change and keep working hard if he\u0027s been non hard working for so long?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Ehow do you change yourself and keep on doing It, what are the steps?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Elike could you give an example for the gym, ball, girls, etc?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E3. what if a person reaches a point where you said a person should be by that time and gives up because he\u0027s not there yet?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Efor example, in your article about being older and being either retired, having your own business, or being high up in where you work by mid 30s if you want younger women.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Ewhat if a guy isn\u0027t there and gives up because he doesn\u0027t have those things by that age? should he just give up on younger women? doesn\u0027t matter how the guy gets there, he could have done things right and lost his job and never could get back in the field, he had a business, but it never took off, he hasn\u0027t had luck with any job at all. so here a guy is at mid 30s with none of those things financial wise, what is he to do then? \u00a0\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Eby reading that article it seems he needs to have one of those by that age or other wise he can\u0027t get younger women.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Eso what would be the solution for him? does he push on to try to get girls as he works on himself even though it sounds like he can\u0027t because he isn\u0027t where he needs to be financially? or does he give up because he doesn\u0027t have those things?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E4. is there anything you think I should deprogram from what you know about me\u00a0and start fresh? let me know what I can work on.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Ethanks\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3040\/88705\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88817\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88817#comment-88817\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88817#comment-88817\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EMaintaining Momentum, Giving Up\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Saturday, 7 September 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/you-can-learn-first-you-must-deprogram-unhelpful-beliefs\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/88705#comment-88705\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003ESZ-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI mean, it depends on the school.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf it\u0027s a \u0027normal\u0027 university, then yeah, kinda weird if you don\u0027t live on campus at least the first year.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf it\u0027s a commuter school or a community college, it\u0027s typically more normal to have some\/all students commuting from off campus. So very much depends. I was chiefly thinking of big \u0027normal\u0027 4-year universities.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EFor maintaining momentum post-rock bottom, \u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/how-create-habit-you-ll-stick\u0022\u003Ebuilding new habits\u003C\/a\u003E is probably the single most key facet. You have a new habit in place after only 30 or so days (sometimes less; I saw a claim of 21 days for habit formation recently), so you\u0027re not telling yourself \u0022I have to do this forever\u0022 but \u0022I have to do this for 30 days.\u0022 Because once the 30 days are past, you\u0027re in the habit of doing it, and it now takes little to no will power to continue to do it.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf you\u0027re trying to learn a better work habit when you haven\u0027t had one, I\u0027d recommend \u003Cem\u003EThe Practicing Mind\u003C\/em\u003E. Great book on building good habits and motivating yourself.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/what-point-do-you-give\u0022\u003EI\u0027ve talked in-depth about giving up before\u003C\/a\u003E, and suggest you read that article for my full views. But on giving up, if you are The Guy Who Gives Up Too Early I mentioned in that post, then it\u0027s mostly comes down to faith. You \u003Cem\u003Edon\u0027t believe\u003C\/em\u003E continuing on the way you are will get you where you want to go, so you quit. Is that the right answer? It might be! It could be the path you were on really wasn\u0027t the right one for you. It may well have been a dead end for you. Or it could just be that was the right path for you, but you quit too soon. Differs on a case-by-case basis.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWith something like game though, you have to have a mentality of \u0022Well, if I don\u0027t have X thing I probably should have, and I can\u0027t change that, then I need to get where I want to get to without that.\u0022 This is a perfectly fine mentality and it works. It you don\u0027t have that mentality, it\u0027s because you don\u0027t believe it, and it\u0027s again a faith thing. It\u0027s very hard to teach that and I\u0027m not sure how. I can write plenty about it, and many guys may read that and say \u0022Man, Chase is right, I\u0027m sold,\u0022 then go get to it. You I know are just like \u0022Man, I don\u0027t know, I still have my doubts\u0022 about which there isn\u0027t much I can do. If a guy shares his points and his stories and anecdotes and advice and you are still doubtful, you need to find some other way to reassure yourself. That might be meeting someone personally who is already doing what you\u0027re doing and watching what he does \/ studying under him. Or it might be finding someone else teaching the thing in a different way that appeals to you more.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003E4. is there anything you think I should deprogram from what you know about me\u00a0and start fresh? let me know what I can work on.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOh, dude... so many things.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u0027d start here though:\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cul\u003E\n\u003Cli\u003E\u0022Women are most attracted to men in their 20s. After 29, it\u0027s all downhill.\u0022\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003Cli\u003E\u0022You\u0027ve either got to be young or rich if you want to do well with girls.\u0022\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003Cli\u003E\u0022I don\u0027t want to do \u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/top-7-easiest-ways-get-laid-raise-your-notch-count\u0022\u003Ethe notch count stuff Chase recommends\u003C\/a\u003E. But I\u0027m sure there must be another way to easily reach 100 notches.\u0022\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003Cli\u003E\u0022I just need to figure out the right magic bullet to make getting the women I want easy. Maybe I can ask Chase enough questions to get him to tell me it.\u0022\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf you deprogrammed yourself of just those four beliefs, I suspect the rest would take care of itself.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAs to your other questions in the other comment: it\u0027s a hobby if you want it to be a hobby. Or it can be a passion. An obsession even. Very much depends on the guy.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EMe, I approach when I feel like it these days. When I see a very cute girl, or if I\u0027m suddenly just in the mood for it, mostly. I don\u0027t need to schedule it or obsess over it at this point. I\u0027ve pretty much not been single since getting seriously into the game in 2006; there have always been women in my life since from that point forward. Scheduling it and obsessing over it was only something I did during my big learning push between 2006 to 2010. It\u0027s a grind to go out all the time and pick up all the time (although I know a few guys who live for that grind... looking at you, \u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/articles\/alek-rolstad\u0022\u003EAlek Rolstad\u003C\/a\u003E!). At least for me once I was happy with where I was at I didn\u0027t need to make it top priority in my life anymore where I carved out huge blocks of time all the time to be in clubs four days out of the week or have tons of dates set up every week. The obsession\/learning phase ends and it just becomes a pasttime you engage in when you feel like it, rather than this thing you \u0022have to do\u0022 all the time.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003E3. Can a semi older guy like me with child-like math skills, failed out of stem, and has 50k student loans debt, have his money handled at all in the not too distant future?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAs always, every time you ask this question, sure.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EHis pathways there are more limited than they are for perhaps some other men. But there are plenty of men with plenty of money who are terrible at math and science and used to be in debt.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThat said, to get there, you\u0027ve got to find \u003Cem\u003Esomething\u003C\/em\u003E you are good at (or can be good at) that allows you to make money.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnd once you find it, you\u0027ve got to hustle hard.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ENo guy ever got rich by sitting on his rear waiting for money to strike him.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003E4. when you wrote about older men in their 40s without their money handled, it made me worry a lot. It\u0027s like what do I focus on? I don\u0027t want to try and learn to sleep with a bunch of girls as an older man, but I don\u0027t want to be broke either or lonely.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Eso its like I have to do both so I can be set in my 40s, I have to be good with money and women by then.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EFast track one, slow track the other, but work on both.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EGo out four days a week, schedule as many dates as possible, tweak your game and fundamentals incessantly, and obsess over game if that\u0027s the fast track one. Meantime, be taking little steps that have the potential to grow into something much larger down the line when it comes to money if that\u0027s the slow track one (e.g., gradually learn coding. Or Internet marketing. Or a well-paying trade. Chip away at it).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOr do it the other way: get an apprenticeship for some career opportunity with loads of upside, and pull out the stops to do the best job you can, soak up as much knowledge as you can, network like crazy in the space, and turn yourself into the go-to guy on [some unique, critical aspect of the space]. Learn obsessively about it. Become an expert of some key part of your niche. Get known by everyone you can, and maintain an impeccable work reputation. Meantime, flirt with women when you meet them. Ask them out, schedule dates where you can. Get practice in while you can. Slow track it, but still work on it between work.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYou can do both. But you probably can\u0027t fast track both. That\u0027s fine, slow track one while you fast track the other, so you\u0027re still making progress on the one, and planting seeds that can grow a lot more a little later down the line.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003Ethen comes the kids thing, do I have kids now while young and broke to get it out of the way? or do I wait until I\u0027m older and better off financially? but what if I\u0027m not better off and have no kids, but I\u0027m older now?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Ethen it\u0027s too late.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI suggest you get at least women or money handled before you have any children.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EMaybe set yourself a hard cutoff if kids are important of \u0022If I hit 42 and I\u0027m still not where I want with women or career, but I know I want kids, this is the age where I say well, time to stop dreaming, and produce some offspring.\u0022 Or whatever age is your cutoff age for that.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003EI think I have to get extremely well with money and women at the same time, I want kids, but not until I get both those handled.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EVery few people ever get extremely good with both romance and finance.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThere is the added wrinkle on top that once you reach the point where you are much better than you are, you still feel like you have a long way to go before you are \u0027extremely good\u0027. Thus you might actually be pretty well off, relatively to the average man, yet still unhappy with where you\u0027re at.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAgain, I recommend \u003Cem\u003EThe Practicing Mind\u003C\/em\u003E for thinking about this. Excellent book for that.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3040\/88817\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88809\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88809#comment-88809\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022SZ\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022SZ\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022SZ\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022SZ\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88809#comment-88809\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EReply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003ESZ (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 5 September 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/you-can-learn-first-you-must-deprogram-unhelpful-beliefs\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHey Chase, this is a reply to your last comment.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E1. Is learning pick up and sleeping with a lot of girls just a hobby really? money is king we know, but I thought that getting and sleeping with many girls helps us in life with getting a partner and helps us have self confidence because we know we\u0027re wanted.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI know guys do get tired of it, but maybe I read what you wrote wrong, but I feel it\u0027s a little more than a hobby because you built a big business off if it and all guys talk about is getting girls.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIdk maybe you mean that making money is more important for yourself than getting girls because they don\u0027t help you in the same way.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Ebut when I think of it as a hobby, it makes me think it isn\u0027t worth my time because I\u0027m not getting g anything from it, but it must be important because there\u0027s many sites and videos about relationships.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Ewhen you were learning this stuff, you had to have known sleeping with many women was important for something.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E2. How often do you approach now? I know you\u0027re super busy and have been the past few years, and how do you keep it consistent with your busy schedule?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E3. Can a semi older guy like me with child-like math skills, failed out of stem, and has 50k student loans debt, have his money handled at all in the not too distant future?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E4. when you wrote about older men in their 40s without their money handled, it made me worry a lot. It\u0027s like what do I focus on? I don\u0027t want to try and learn  to sleep with a bunch of girls as an older man, but I don\u0027t want to be broke either or lonely.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Eso its like I have to do both so I can be set in my 40s, I have to be good with money and women by then.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Ethen comes the kids thing, do I have kids now while young and broke to get it out of the way? or do I wait until I\u0027m older and better off financially?  but what if I\u0027m not better off and have no kids, but I\u0027m older now?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Ethen it\u0027s too late.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003Eall this stuff is confusing me.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI think I have to get extremely well with money and women at the same time, I want kids, but not until I get both those handled.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThanks\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3040\/88809\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-89213\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/89213#comment-89213\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022amit\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022amit\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022amit\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022amit\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/89213#comment-89213\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003Etruth!\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003Eamit (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Saturday, 14 December 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/you-can-learn-first-you-must-deprogram-unhelpful-beliefs\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003Eas an indian non brahmin guy, who had to scrap from the bottom, with zero social skills, had to acquire all skills in life, i can honestly say this is an accurate assessment about indian guys.  most of them are mama\u0027s boys and think everything should be handed to them.  now i have been able to consistently lay women in all categories, and have had them chase me pretty hard.  i tried to teach what i learned to others but their programming is backwards.  its good to see that this wasnt all in my head.  still working on destroying more limiting beliefs.  regarding success in life more then women, but i thnk they are all intertwined.  thanks for the article.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3040\/89213\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/dev\u003E\u003C\/dev\u003E\u003Cdev class=\u0022comment-form ajax-comment-form\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv id=\u0022comments\u0022 class=\u0022comment-wrapper\u0022\u003E\n  \n  \n      \u003Ch4 class=\u0022title comment-form\u0022\u003ELeave a Comment\u003C\/h4\u003E\n    \u003Cform class=\u0022comment-form user-info-from-cookie\u0022 action=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3040\u0022 method=\u0022post\u0022 id=\u0022comment-form\u0022 accept-charset=\u0022UTF-8\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cdiv 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