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id=\u0022comment-88538\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88538#comment-88538\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Ben\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Ben\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Ben\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Ben\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88538#comment-88538\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EBeing an avoidant attachment child\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EBen (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Monday, 24 June 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/female-attachment-profiles-secure-avoidant-and-more\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHey chase so I thought this was interesting you brought this up because I think that i\u0027m an avoidant attachment person. I don\u0027t really seek out connections with other people. I have dropped a lot of my old friends because they\u0027re low value or treated me like shit when they were younger. Now I don\u0027t even seek out friendships with other men. Like unless they\u0027re a cool guy who I know can pickup girls I act cold towards them because i\u0027ve met so many people in my life that making friends is not that valueable to me. The only thing I care about is having women in my life. I don\u0027t reach out or text people from my social circle much and only meet up with a few close friends if they invite me. My parents are south asian so I was raised in a culture where the child must abide by everything the parents do\u00a0and nothing else matters. Not the child\u0027s happiness,self esteem, whether he or she grows up with\u00a0positive life experiences. My parents literally even said that life is not about fun. I also was picked on,bullied and insulted a lot throughout my adolescent life, and wasn\u0027t very attractive growing up which is why I always assume that negative outcomes will happen for me with girls even though i\u0027m in a much better place than in high school. Have you known guys who walked a similiar path where he had so many negative life experiences as a youngster,but then overcame it and was able to build himself\u00a0a successful career in the field he wants, strong circle of friends, and have beautiful lovers to support him? I know anything is possible if you out in the work, but it\u0027s hard for me to believe in myself.I\u0027m not sure if this is victim mentality because I don\u0027t blame anybody for my current struggles. I\u0027m just bitter towards my parents and their contribution towards how neurotic I am and also the kids\u00a0I went to school with who treated me like shit.\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3013\/88538\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88548\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88548#comment-88548\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88548#comment-88548\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EOvercoming Avoidant Attachment\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Tuesday, 25 June 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/female-attachment-profiles-secure-avoidant-and-more\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/88538#comment-88538\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EBen-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYes, that\u0027s a childhood that\u0027ll predispose you to avoidance for sure.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u0027ve known guys who\u0027ve changed their attachment styles, yes. The big obstacle is not really \u0022can someone do it\u0022 but \u0022is this person driven to do it?\u0022\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf he actually is driven to do it, a guy can completely rewire his own brain. I personally was probably fairly heavy on the avoidant spectrum when younger. I loved my independence, had zero need for friends, only wanted women in my life, and would get pretty uncomfortable when women (even beautiful women I\u0027d previously chased hard for) grew too attached. However, I consciously forced myself into heavy socializing (where I\u0027d be out with different groups of friends\/people probably 3 or 4 days a week... in addition to going on dates or going out solo to meet girls several more days per week, and in addition to having at least one regular girlfriend at a time, too) for several years. I forced myself to stick around in all sorts of friend and girl situations where people would be expressing their emotions to me, just to make myself comfortable with it. I didn\u0027t take an attachment styles test when younger, but if I did I probably would\u0027ve been much higher on avoidance (and probably disorganized and maybe some anxious as well). Now my avoidance is a small sliver, and I am mostly secure.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe only reason I was able to do all this stuff though was because I had a philosophy that \u0022this emotional\/connected stuff makes me uncomfortable, and discomfort is a weakness, so whatever I am uncomfortable with, I need to spend enough time around to get comfortable with it; otherwise I am weak.\u0022 Many other guys I see do not seem to have any real motivation to change their attachment styles... so they don\u0027t.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThere is a difference between \u0022I would like to change X\u0022 and \u0022I am driven by Y and Z to change X.\u0022 \u0022I would like to\u0022 is not enough. You must find a driver you can use to motivate yourself to put in the hard work exposing yourself, again and again over a period of time, to situations that are uncomfortable to allow your brain to adapt to the emotional stimuli you have learned to avoid.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3013\/88548\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88551\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88551#comment-88551\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/340breeze\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022340Breeze\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022340Breeze\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022340Breeze\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022340Breeze\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88551#comment-88551\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EGood Article, but...\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/340breeze\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/340breeze\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E340Breeze\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Wednesday, 26 June 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/female-attachment-profiles-secure-avoidant-and-more\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EOne thing you didn\u2019t talk about is how the male\/female attachment styles interact. Like what happens when an avoidant male pairs off with an anxious female. Or an anxious male with an avoidant female. \u00a0Or other combinations thereof. \u00a0Some anxiously-attached\u00a0women seem to only be attracted to \u0027avoidant\u0027 style men, and find secure men to be boring. \u00a0Are some of the material on this website that teaches men not to chase, to seem cool even aloof, etc., written to deal with the anxious-style female? \u00a0How would seduction techniques differ depending on the attachment-style of a woman? \u00a0I don\u0027t think a securely-attached woman would find a securely-attached man to be \u0027boring.\u0027\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAlso how does a man move from avoidant\/anxious\/disorganized to secure? A man\u2019s attachment style is going to affect how he seduces\u00a0and how he responds \u0022when women test.\u201d And women always test. An avoidant seducer is completely different than a secure seducer (on an emotional and relational level). Maybe what makes women so hard to understand for some men has to do with attachment styles.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EFinally, relationships are supposed to be a safe space. \u00a0I think alot of people in the West seem to have forgotten (or never learned) that. \u00a0Unfortunately, if, as a child\/teen, you\u2019ve been abused, molested, denigrated, or otherwise suffered emotional or even physical trauma , and you haven\u2019t healed yet (whether from therapy or meditation or being in a relationship with securely-attached individuals) you won\u2019t even consciously know (much less unconsciously) that your behavior in a relationship should be to seek to create safety and reassurance.\u00a0 Emotional Trauma causes PTSD, and a lack of healing from emotional trauma will affect you in your relationships and how you seduce. Without healing, you probably will create chaos in your relationship and not even realize, or don\u0027t know how to sidestep it. \u00a0You can read all the material you want on girlschase, but you will still languish as a seducer (and a creator of safe spaces with your women) until and unless\u00a0you do the grief work to heal from your pain, and release the negativity percolating deep in your unconscious. Some men seem to gravitate towards personality disordered women, but many of those Men are themselves silent sufferers of abuse molestation or worse. But when you heal, and come to understand on an intuitive level the need for safety in your relationships, cluster b or bitchy or selfish lack of empathy women etc, become completely UNAPPEALING because your unconscious doesn\u2019t view them as \u201csafe.\u201d When you heal, you develop an unconscious protective shield against bs that some of these women spew. \u00a0Women that lack empathy, or are perpetual victims, or otherwise can\u0027t empathize\/see the male point of view don\u0027t create safety in relationships. \u00a0That\u0027s why it\u0027s best to avoid them... no one forces any man to be with a woman. \u00a0He chooses to do so, or not. \u00a0So choose wisely. \u00a0Choose and cultivate safety. \u00a0Heal. When you heal, you vibrate on a different level...on a zen level. \u00a0Women that don\u0027t vibrate on your zen frequency (and instead are drama queens because of their own unhealed pain etc) are \u0027problem\u0027 women in my view. \u00a0We can\u0027t change anyone..they have to want to change. \u00a0So unless and until a woman does her own grief work to heal (even if she\u0027s a 9 or 10 and the pussy is goood), she still needs to be\u00a0released\u00a0back into the wild if she fucks with your zen. \u00a0Value your sanity and safety above all else.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EId argue that to become the best seducer, it starts within. Healing from pain\/suffering\/trauma. Finding the love within yourself. Long in advance of any conversation with any woman.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3013\/88551\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88577\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88577#comment-88577\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88577#comment-88577\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EAnxious Attachment Women, and Attachment Styles in Men\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 4 July 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/female-attachment-profiles-secure-avoidant-and-more\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/88551#comment-88551\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003E340Breeze-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EGood questions.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYes, people with anxious attachment styles need to pursue. They value more highly those people who make them chase. The kind of chasing I urge men to get women to do on this site is not necessarily \u0027anxious woman\u0027-tier chasing... though you can get that kind of chasing if you use the material and you run into an anxious gal. However, even secure and avoidant attachers will chase you a bit if they\u0027re into you and you create a bit of that vaccuum to suck them into.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EEven with secure attachers, people are most attracted to what is a bit of a challenge. The level of challenge someone wants differs by attachment style. If we had a rating of 1 to 10 levels of aloofness, where 1 is \u0027completely available\u0027 and 10 is \u0027completely unavailable\u0027, a secure woman might be most attracted to a man who is, say, at level 4 aloofness, while an anxious woman might go craziest for a man who\u0027s at 7 or 8. You do need to modify your level of aloofness (if you want to date different types of women with different attachment styles), but all women do need at least some of it. An excess of absolutely too much over-availability can make everyone lose interest.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOne thing I will say is it\u0027s fascinating to watch a highly anxious individual and the sort of relationships he will have. He\u0027ll chase hard after another partner, think he\u0027s desperately in love with her, and then if he ever gets her and she gives himself over to him completely, he loses all interest. Then at some point, once she realizes she\u0027s lost him, she may go ice cold to him, leave, and then all of a sudden he realizes he\u0027s obsessed with her again.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003EAlso how does a man move from avoidant\/anxious\/disorganized to secure? A man\u2019s attachment style is going to affect how he seduces\u00a0and how he responds \u0022when women test.\u201d And women always test. An avoidant seducer is completely different than a secure seducer (on an emotional and relational level). Maybe what makes women so hard to understand for some men has to do with attachment styles.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe only ways I know are consistently successful are:\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Col type=\u0022a\u0022\u003E\n\u003Cli\u003ETherapy\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003Cli\u003ERelationships with secure individuals\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ol\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI shifted my attachment style in my 20s, partly from relationships with secure women, partly from doing active work to change how I felt about other people. More details on that in \u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/comment\/88548#comment-88548\u0022\u003Ethe comment above yours\u003C\/a\u003E.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThis is an excellent comment:\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003EFinally, relationships are supposed to be a safe space. \u00a0I think alot of people in the West seem to have forgotten (or never learned) that. \u00a0Unfortunately, if, as a child\/teen, you\u2019ve been abused, molested, denigrated, or otherwise suffered emotional or even physical trauma , and you haven\u2019t healed yet (whether from therapy or meditation or being in a relationship with securely-attached individuals) you won\u2019t even consciously know (much less unconsciously) that your behavior in a relationship should be to seek to create safety and reassurance.\u00a0 Emotional Trauma causes PTSD, and a lack of healing from emotional trauma will affect you in your relationships and how you seduce. Without healing, you probably will create chaos in your relationship and not even realize, or don\u0027t know how to sidestep it. \u00a0You can read all the material you want on girlschase, but you will still languish as a seducer (and a creator of safe spaces with your women) until and unless\u00a0you do the grief work to heal from your pain, and release the negativity percolating deep in your unconscious. Some men seem to gravitate towards personality disordered women, but many of those Men are themselves silent sufferers of abuse molestation or worse. But when you heal, and come to understand on an intuitive level the need for safety in your relationships, cluster b or bitchy or selfish lack of empathy women etc, become completely UNAPPEALING because your unconscious doesn\u2019t view them as \u201csafe.\u201d When you heal, you develop an unconscious protective shield against bs that some of these women spew. \u00a0Women that lack empathy, or are perpetual victims, or otherwise can\u0027t empathize\/see the male point of view don\u0027t create safety in relationships. \u00a0That\u0027s why it\u0027s best to avoid them... no one forces any man to be with a woman. \u00a0He chooses to do so, or not. \u00a0So choose wisely. \u00a0Choose and cultivate safety. \u00a0Heal. When you heal, you vibrate on a different level...on a zen level. \u00a0Women that don\u0027t vibrate on your zen frequency (and instead are drama queens because of their own unhealed pain etc) are \u0027problem\u0027 women in my view. \u00a0We can\u0027t change anyone..they have to want to change. \u00a0So unless and until a woman does her own grief work to heal (even if she\u0027s a 9 or 10 and the pussy is goood), she still needs to be\u00a0released\u00a0back into the wild if she fucks with your zen. \u00a0Value your sanity and safety above all else.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYou have my complete agreement. Nothing to add here.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003EId argue that to become the best seducer, it starts within. Healing from pain\/suffering\/trauma. Finding the love within yourself. Long in advance of any conversation with any woman.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EHuge part of what we might call \u0027true\u0027 success.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThere are a lot of highly prolific seducers who are very broken guys. The brokenness actually helps their success as seducers... largely because they cannot hang onto relationships at all and are perpetually on the hunt for fresh bedmates.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EHowever, when you\u0027re like this you tend to struggle with a great deal of depression, self-doubt, even suicidal feelings, that the parade of women into your bed only temporarily alleviates. There\u0027s certainly nothing wrong with going for a high notch count, and unlike some folks on the Internet I actually think it\u0027s pretty healthy if you have the right psychology for it. If you\u0027re using it to self-medicate though, it\u0027s just a bandage rather than a permanent fix.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOften I have seen high count guys who used women to self-medicate completely lose interest in casual sex once they fix their broken internal issues, and end up in lasting relationships they\u0027re very happy with not long after. It\u0027s always a surprising transition to see. But you can see the guy is much more content, so you\u0027re happy for him.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3013\/88577\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88552\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88552#comment-88552\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022SZ\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022SZ\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022SZ\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022SZ\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88552#comment-88552\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EQuestions \u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003ESZ (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Wednesday, 26 June 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/female-attachment-profiles-secure-avoidant-and-more\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHey Chase,\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E1. I\u0027m fine with making a lifestyle change to get my lays up to 100s. To be honest, I\u0027m fine with getting 15-20+ women a year then doing more the next. 100 us the goal in the near future, but for now reaching a baseline of consistent notches is the goal for the very short term.\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe thing is, what do you mean exactly by lifestyle change? I\u0027m assuming you mean putting my energy into getting laid all the time and cutting things out, which makes sense.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut I\u0027m not sure if I\u0027m correct on how I\u0027m thinking. Would it really be that time consuming? How do men get up there and still live their lives?\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBasically everyone works a 9-5 and I would assume a guy would have to have money coming in to go on dates, get fashion, pay for necessities, etc. A guy has to get his body right to date and I\u0027m sure he has other hobbies, etc. And can still get a lot of lays.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo I\u0027m kind of lost on what I would have to give up in order to make this lifestyle change or what you recommend?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI am very obsessed with getting laid, not in the needy way, I just love pussy, I love kissing all over women\u0027s bodies and making them feel good. I think about fuckin a lot, so in that part I want to make getting laid regularly a reality.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI feel I can still make the lifestyle change with what I\u0027m focusing on now, maybe not to an extreme extent because I have a lot to work on, but I don\u0027t see what I would have to really change.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI do have a lot on my plate, but I can find some time to talk to women, it\u0027s just during those times I like to relax.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo if a guy works a 9-5, goes to the gym, learns skills, and has hobbies. What does he have to change to make his lifestyle about getting laid?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ECould you give an example of what a guy is doing to change his lifestyle to getting laid? All I can think of is going to pickup after work during the week and going out on the weekends.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u0027m thinking about self improvement and women so much all of the time, there has to be a way to make these things work.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf you could give an example of the guy who\u0027s lifestyle is about getting laid I\u0027d appreciate it.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E2. Could you also give an example on how you wouldn\u0027t pay for a cheap date? (Coffee, ice cream, pizza, drinks). I can\u0027t think of a way to get out of not paying, I\u0027d be paying because I want things to go smooth and I don\u0027t want to look cheap. So I don\u0027t feel it would be right to do something I don\u0027t want to do. I just can\u0027t think of any scenario of a girl who wouldn\u0027t expect me to pay. How would a date like that work going dutch?\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAll I can imagine is that she\u0027ll look at me crazy for not paying and bitch about me being cheap.\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI imagine we get on line and I just see the scenario of her looking at me to pay every time and it not ending well. I can\u0027t think to make it work, but I do not want to pay of it won\u0027t work for me, I just can\u0027t visualize a girl not expecting me to pay for her cheap stuff.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EJust wondering what do you do in that situation when you\u0027re both on line and she expects you to pay? Like what do you tell her for your reason not to pay?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E3. What is the age gap of the distinguished Older gentleman anyway? I\u0027m not too much older than these girls (4-5 years). Would it be like 10?\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E4. I don\u0027t have anyone to see what I\u0027m doing wrong which sucks, and the only time they could see is at the club because that\u0027s the only time I\u0027ll be with someone getting girls.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe guys I\u0027m with usually get girls the same way I do, just dance with them and get their number. Or even talk and get their number, I observe.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThere\u0027s nothing really great about their game to me. These girls just cooperate more.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOne of them told me to talk to the girls for a week or two before asking for the date. I\u0027m against that and actually tried it and it didn\u0027t work.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ETo me it\u0027s really a luck thing.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI can\u0027t get dates for shit, but everything else is good. Of course if you can\u0027t get dates, you can\u0027t get laid. I have gotten laid more than I have been on dates with different women lol.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI can get numbers all day, I get compliance, I try to deep dive a little, etc.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThese girls also hook as well. There\u0027s times where I talk to girls and it gets quiet, I actually try to leave, but the girl will keep talking to me asking me questions, which makes me stay and to keep talking to her.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u0027m in my head a lot about what I\u0027m doing and try to think of what I read from on here, I\u0027m smooth with it, and I\u0027m very aware of what I\u0027m doing.\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThings work great in person, but that date never comes.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI just started using apps and have been getting matched a lot, but these girls are just time wasters.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI actually had conversations with girls from apps and tried to do some deep diving on the phone even to switch the game up.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI tried being on the phone short and I tried being on the phone long.\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EDidn\u0027t work.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EMy things is clubs and apps suck for meeting women right? But if you talk to 100s of women from both, wouldn\u0027t you get lucky some of the time?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf you have 20 matches or talk to 20 girls in the club, you can\u0027t get 5 to go on a date? That makes no sense to me.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo yeah, I don\u0027t have anyone to go out with, and I also don\u0027t have anyone to go out with that pays attention like that with game. They aren\u0027t thinking like that, this isn\u0027t a skillset to them, it just happens.\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnd I\u0027m not saying these guys got it easy, but they get dates, and they are not black, which I think makes it easier for them because that\u0027s what a lot of women care about more.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo, I\u0027m going to try to fix this myself.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWith real life dating, all I can tell you is that I can attract women, my conversations are good, I have women giving me compliance, I have women talking to me and wanting to talk to me. I\u0027m asking for dates and getting numbers.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWith online, I get a lot of attractive matches and I barely have worked on my profile. A lot of girls give no conversation. It\u0027ll be hey, and I ask them something and that\u0027s it, I just assume they\u0027re time wasters.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe girls who do bite, I get the number fast and I talk to them, they act very excited to see me and I get them on short calls (like recommended on the site). Then their whole attitudes change and they just don\u0027t come out and ghost.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo I thought, let\u0027s try to deep dive on the phone and then meet up for a second and try to bring her right back over in 10 minutes or less.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ETalked to this chick for hours deep diving, she texts me the next day, then she just stops texting me that same exact day. I didn\u0027t bother reaching out.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAll of this is mind boggling.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhat I can also say is that I have gotten my most success from work. I got so many girls from work, some would play games, but a majority it was straight to the bed.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI know a lot of people hook up from work, but I was getting these girls straight to the bed, no dates or anything.\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIt would be many girls, they all are giving me their phone numbers, \u00a0coming straight over to fuck, loved it. I would have many girls that liked me, one time I had 8-10 chasing me at once.\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThese girls made it pretty straight forward. Either I\u0027d ask them out or they asked me out and that was it.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo that\u0027s where I shined at.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI say that to see if you can see what the difference is between work and the other avenues that I used for girls.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EMaybe you can find something and connect what I could be doing right and maybe I\u0027m missing something and could use that to fix everything.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ETo sum it all up, I just would like you know what you think the remedy is to fixing this.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI can get girls doing everything in person, I can even get them talking on the phone, but for them to come out its extremely challenging.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo what would be the solution to getting attraction, having good conversations, getting girls to agree to dates, exchanging numbers, but no dates?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ECould it be a deep diving thing? Do they think I\u0027m a player? Do they think I don\u0027t take them serious?\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u0027m wracking my brain on what I can do differently.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI tried having quick convos on the phone to set up the date.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI tried long convos.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI tired no texting, but to only set up that date. If the date was a week a way, I would not contact her until the day before.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI tried having meaningless all day text conversations just to see if that would work.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EStill the same thing.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf you can just give me some type of idea on what a guy needs to do to get a girl to want to see him again or the first time if it\u0027s online dating, and I\u0027ll do it.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf I need to talk more over the phone I\u0027ll do it, text more I\u0027ll do it, whatever you can give me an idea on how making a girl want to go out on a date I\u0027ll focus on that.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThanks\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3013\/88552\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88579\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88579#comment-88579\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88579#comment-88579\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ERaising Notch Counts; Diagnosing Problems You Can\u0026#039;t Diagnose\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 4 July 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/female-attachment-profiles-secure-avoidant-and-more\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/88552#comment-88552\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003ESZ-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIt\u0027s all in this article:\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/top-7-easiest-ways-get-laid-raise-your-notch-count\u0022\u003ETop 7 Easiest Ways to Get Laid \u0026amp; Raise Your Notch Count\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf you have one of those jobs, you don\u0027t need any extra money for dates. If you\u0027re a bartender, or a DJ, or a lifeguard, or a tour guide, probably 10% of your lays come from dates. Once you figure out your angle, you likely don\u0027t even do dates at all for the first few years, until you get tired of what you\u0027re getting from casual sex and decide you want to see what the girls it takes a little more investment to get are like.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI think you just are not familiar at all what a lifestyle with abundant women looks like. Imagine women horny to have sex with you, who are competing to be the one you pick. You don\u0027t have to spend any money on these women. You don\u0027t even have to spend much extra time. You still do need game; you need some personality; and so on. The job itself is not enough, you must still be attractive. But as soon as you have a \u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/when-girls-compete-over-you\u0022\u003Ecompetition effect going on\u003C\/a\u003E, seduction gets 10x easier.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ECheap date: \u0022I\u0027ll get the pizza if you\u0027ll get the beers.\u0022 \u0022Ice cream\u0027s on me if you\u0027ll spring for movie tickets later.\u0022 \u0022Wanna grab this one and I\u0027ll get us next time?\u0022 Or just wait until she goes for her wallet: \u0022Cool, you go this?\u0022 YMMV, of course... the more highly she values you, the less she\u0027ll care about paying. The more she may WANT to pay, just to even out the value differential a bit. However, the less valuable you are to her, the more she may resent you not paying. The value has to be there for her to be cool with paying.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003E3. What is the age gap of the distinguished Older gentleman anyway? I\u0027m  not too much older than these girls (4-5 years). Would it be like 10?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ECompletely subjective. Some 18 y\/o college girls think a guy is \u0022way too old\u0022 if he\u0027s 23. And then you\u0027ll find a 25 y\/o chick who\u0027s happy dating her 46 y\/o beau because he\u0027s attractive, fit, confident, energetic, and reasonably successful. Really depends.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003EThere\u0027s nothing really great about their game to me. These girls just cooperate more.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ETo me it\u0027s really a luck thing.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EJust because you can\u0027t see it, and they can\u0027t describe it, doesn\u0027t mean \u0022well it must just be luck.\u0022 It rarely is.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003EMy things is clubs and apps suck for meeting women right? But if you  talk to 100s of women from both, wouldn\u0027t you get lucky some of the  time?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf you have 20 matches or talk to 20 girls in the club, you can\u0027t get 5 to go on a date? That makes no sense to me.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYes, if you do enough numbers, you should have some girls it randomly connects with.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI got dates from nightclubs even back when I was a beginner. It was low odds, and most girls flaked\/ghosted, but every now and then a girl I\u0027d met at a club but hadn\u0027t slept with would come out on a date with me. Just by pure random variation, if you\u0027re taking 20 numbers from girls at clubs, you should be able to get 1 or 2 dates out of that.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ENot high odds, but it shouldn\u0027t be zero, either.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003EThe girls who do bite, I get the number fast and I talk to them, they  act very excited to see me and I get them on short calls (like  recommended on the site). Then their whole attitudes change and they  just don\u0027t come out and ghost.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo I thought, let\u0027s try to deep dive on the phone and then meet up  for a second and try to bring her right back over in 10 minutes or less.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ETalked to this chick for hours deep diving, she texts me the next  day, then she just stops texting me that same exact day. I didn\u0027t bother  reaching out.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAll of this is mind boggling.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo you\u0027re losing them at the phone call.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u0027d zero in on that and figure out what the problem is there. Even if you think your conversations are good, clearly there is something there causing women to hit the exit at that point.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003EWhat I can also say is that I have gotten my most success from work. I  got so many girls from work, some would play games, but a majority it  was straight to the bed.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI know a lot of people hook up from work, but I was getting these girls straight to the bed, no dates or anything.\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIt would be many girls, they all are giving me their phone numbers,  \u00a0coming straight over to fuck, loved it. I would have many girls that  liked me, one time I had 8-10 chasing me at once.\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThese girls made it pretty straight forward. Either I\u0027d ask them out or they asked me out and that was it.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo that\u0027s where I shined at.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI say that to see if you can see what the difference is between work and the other avenues that I used for girls.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYeah, so you\u0027re more attractive over the mid- to long-game.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOnce a girl gets to know you, she\u0027s sold.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut you suck on the approach when you\u0027re still a stranger.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EUsually this is a sign you\u0027ve developed qualities that let you gradually shine as someone is exposed to you more. But you\u0027re not good at selling yourself fast with people who don\u0027t know you yet.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI was this way until maybe a few years into seduction. Put a girl around me for a few months and she\u0027d be in-love with me, 100%. Put a girl around me for 10 minutes, first meet, and she has no idea who I am and doesn\u0027t care. It\u0027s very frustrating because you know if you could somehow get her around you longer, she\u0027d fall for you. But you can\u0027t, you\u0027ve just got those 10 minutes, and your long-term charms don\u0027t work.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYou have two choices... the one I went for was \u0022I\u0027m just going to have to develop this completely new, totally alien skill set of cold approach, where I figure out how to make an excellent first impression and make women want me within a couple of minutes.\u0022 A lot of this website is geared toward that. It\u0027s learnable, but it\u0027s tough to learn if it isn\u0027t natural for you.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe other is to redesign your life in a way you are around a lot of attractive women all the time and get those opportunities like your work gave you. See the notch count post above, or pick a job in the restaurant industry or another similar industry where everyone sleeps with everybody.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003ETo sum it all up, I just would like you know what you think the remedy is to fixing this.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EImpossible for me to Internet diagnose, man.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ETo diagnose something over the Internet, you need the guy to at least have some idea what\u0027s going wrong, or he needs to have a standard problem. Yours is non-standard. The way you report it, you\u0027re doing everything (more or less) you should be doing to succeed. But you\u0027re not succeeding. Which means there are one or more big things hobbling you, but you don\u0027t know what they are, and there aren\u0027t clues in what you\u0027re telling me. It\u0027s almost certainly some kind of miscalibration, but that\u0027s impossible to diagnose via text.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3013\/88579\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88554\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88554#comment-88554\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022SZ\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022SZ\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022SZ\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022SZ\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88554#comment-88554\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003E1. Also, what did you do to\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003ESZ (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 27 June 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/female-attachment-profiles-secure-avoidant-and-more\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003E1. Also, what did you do to help your friend solve his problem with having a hard time? You said he\u0027s getting lays, but not keeping them in relationships.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI have had a girl on me for three years and she focused on me and I didn\u0027t commit and she gave me compliance 100%, she was begging for a relationship for three years, that\u0027s past the 2 year drop.\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI had to cut her off, so I believe I\u0027m good at keeping women around a long time. I also have girls come back from years ago trying to rekindle things.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI had another girl chase me for around 2-4 years as well giving me pussy whenever, I have had girls hit me up all the time.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo I got relationships down and keeping women attached, I just need to get more lays.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhat did you do to help your friend overcome his problem to get more lays? Maybe it\u0027ll help me.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E2. I also am going through a dry spell now pretty bad since I left my last chick. It\u0027s to the point idk what I should do. Should I fuck a whale? Should I pay? I am at the point where I can\u0027t control my urges anymore, I need sex and I need more partners, I need to sow my oats and to have multiple women in my pesence.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhat do you recommend to get out of a bad dry spell? I don\u0027t want to pay, nor fuck a huge chick.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThanks\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3013\/88554\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88580\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88580#comment-88580\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88580#comment-88580\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EGetting Laid More; Bang a Fatty to Break a Dry Spell?\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 4 July 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/female-attachment-profiles-secure-avoidant-and-more\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/88554#comment-88554\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003ESZ-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EStill not solved. We figured out he was dating mostly avoidant women, and that these women don\u0027t want long-term relationship with him. It\u0027s a bizarre scenario, because in many ways his boyfriend\/husband value appears to be off-the-charts, while his lover value is just okay. But for some reason the only women he gets are a.) women who want long-term with him but whom he doesn\u0027t want for that, or b.) women he wants long-term with but who only want him short-term. Just a very unusual issue... at this point I half-think the only way I could solve it would be to spend a couple weeks with him in-person just observing how he is when meeting women, on dates, back at his place with girls, etc.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003EWhat did you do to help your friend overcome his problem to get more lays? Maybe it\u0027ll help me.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EHe took me up on the \u0027invite at least one woman home with you every day for 30 days\u0027 challenge. That didn\u0027t get him laid I don\u0027t recall, because he hit resistance with every girl he pulled, but it opened his eyes to how surprisingly easy it is to get many women home with you, even if you\u0027ve just met, if you simply invite them.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EHe found the SAC model from One Date very useful, and I worked with him a bunch on that. In particular we focused on making him less intimidating, which he didn\u0027t realize was a problem, and didn\u0027t listen to me at first when I said it was (he\u0027s a very nice guy in person, yet also quite intimidating), until he heard it from another friend and a handful of women. Working on making him less intimidating \/ more approachable seemed to help a lot.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAlso helping him realize when women turned him down for sex, the way they were doing it, often they liked him and just needed to feel more comfortable with him first (so he should not write them off as quick as he had been).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBeyond that, he\u0027s a self-improvement-oriented guy, studies a lot of stuff, and has a bunch of friends who are good with girls. So I don\u0027t know how much credit for any improvements he\u0027s seen should go to me, and wouldn\u0027t want to make any claims there.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003E2. I also am going through a dry spell now pretty bad since I left my  last chick. It\u0027s to the point idk what I should do. Should I fuck a  whale? Should I pay? I am at the point where I can\u0027t control my urges  anymore, I need sex and I need more partners, I need to sow my oats and  to have multiple women in my pesence.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EJust go out, spam approaches, take as many phone numbers as you can, invite as many women home as you can, set up dates every slot of free time you have available. Hustle your ass off. I don\u0027t think I\u0027d pay, but maybe it\u0027s an option? Same thing with whales... I don\u0027t like that idea, but I have a couple 200+ count friends who swear by them (\u0022good for momentum\u0022). So, it\u0027s an option.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EMake sure you\u0027ve read this article by Alek:\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/\/www.girlschase.com\/content\/sexual-dry-spells-negative-momentum-and-big-picture\u0022\u003ESexual Dry Spells, Negative Momentum, and the Big Picture\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3013\/88580\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88563\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88563#comment-88563\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Sam2-\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Sam2-\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Sam2-\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Sam2-\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88563#comment-88563\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EHow to keep Anxious or Disorganised Women\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003ESam2- (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Monday, 1 July 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/female-attachment-profiles-secure-avoidant-and-more\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EAmazing article Chase,\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u00a0\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI have recently met and bedded a very beautiful 19-year old girl who has strong characteristics of either an anxious or disorganised personality (more likely disorganised). While I had multiple times sex with her making her in fact cum for the first time, I wouldn\u2019t mind spending some quality time with her.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhat type of man a guy should be in order to keep her around? The reliable boyfriend material or the lover who calls her shit out? I have been with her mostly the latter. Does being reliable and showing you care work with her or it will work in the opposite direction: she will get your reassurance and she will leave?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3013\/88563\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88581\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88581#comment-88581\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88581#comment-88581\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ERelationship Management with an Anxious\/Disorganized Chick\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 4 July 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/female-attachment-profiles-secure-avoidant-and-more\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/88563#comment-88563\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003ESam-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWell, I can tell you this... my longest anxious\/disorganized girlfriend had two very reliable boyfriends before me. She dumped both of them after fairly short relationships (a couple months in one case; one month in the other case). And would vascillate between saying she wished I would be more like them, versus saying they were not guys she would\u0027ve dated long-term. I was her first actual long-term relationship.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI kicked the relatioship off with her as basically an unreliable lover who was a good guy but just... not someone you would treat as a dependable prospective boyfriend. Although I still showed plenty of boyfriend qualities, offset by my being not so dependable. It drove her nuts, and she kept trying to leave, then immediatley coming back. My attitude the entire time was *shrug*... I liked her a lot, thought she was great, but wasn\u0027t going to get sucked into the drama. If she wanted to stay, cool. I\u0027d give her a good relationship to the best of my ability, but I\u0027m still a bit of a cad, so there is that. If she wanted to go, I understood. I wouldn\u0027t fight her on that. She was free to leave if that was what she needed to do. She had my blessing and I was sure she\u0027d find someone she\u0027d be thrilled with.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThat ended up being a winning formula with her... nice to her if she wants to be nice, \u0027whatever\u0027 with her if she wants to be schizo. Give her warmth when she\u0027s warm, withdraw it when she\u0027s cool. Worked very well with that type of personality.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EFor the record, that is not my normal behavior with a girlfriend at all. With a more securely attached gal, I\u0027m warm with her when she\u0027s warm, and warm with her when she\u0027s cool. Because usually if she\u0027s annoyed at me, I can just warm her back up into not being annoyed anymore. With an anxious\/disorganized girlfriend, trying to be warm when she\u0027s displeased only repels her from you. So I\u0027d just cool off toward her until her storm had passed, and she\u0027d go back to being warm\/happy again as if nothing\u0027d happened.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3013\/88581\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-88593\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/88593#comment-88593\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Sam-G\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Sam-G\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Sam-G\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Sam-G\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/88593#comment-88593\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EDisorganised Women Live In The Now Only + 1 Question\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003ESam-G (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Friday, 5 July 2019  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/female-attachment-profiles-secure-avoidant-and-more\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EChase,\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThank you for your reply. Also, thank you for the high value content of OneDate. I really enjoyed it.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI am shocked about how similiar my case is to yours, so I will just add a few comments and one last question.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nShe already left once and came back because of jealousy.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nNow, she left for summer vacations to her country and she will come back sometime in September.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nBefore she was about to leave I made a sexual remark in front of her girl friend and she got angry and threw me under the bus, saying for the second time \u0022goodbye\u0022. I then made her again jealous via Instagram. She got again mad and unfollowed me. She texted me that \u0022while I don\u0027t consider you mine at all, I don\u0027t like seeing you with other girls\u0022. She then said again \u0022goodbye\u0022 and also that \u0022I will be here for you if you need me\u0022. I replied with the same fatherly understanding and attitude and I left it there.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EFor this girl I have been the second man in her life and the first one to make her cum for the first time in her life.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nI know that I can\u0027t really have something long-term with her without huge dramatic ups and downs.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nI also know that she lives only for the heat of the moment. So, her \u0022now\u0022 currently says \u0022I am in my country and away from him\u0022.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u003Cstrong\u003EDo you, Chase, think possible (based on your experience and the details I provided) for her to return for more when she comes back in September, given the fact that the sex experience I gave her was according to her \u0022the best of her life?\u003C\/strong\u003E I just feel that the whole thing was prematurely cut off and I would like some more rounds with her. Also, there was some more sexual experimentation that she wanted to do with me before I have led her to autorejection from my sexual comment. She wanted me to fuck her in unusual places, she wanted me to fuck her raw etc I mean even for the sex itself if I was her, I wouldn\u0027t just close the door completely.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3013\/88593\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/dev\u003E\u003C\/dev\u003E\u003Cdev class=\u0022comment-form ajax-comment-form\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv id=\u0022comments\u0022 class=\u0022comment-wrapper\u0022\u003E\n  \n  \n      \u003Ch4 class=\u0022title comment-form\u0022\u003ELeave a Comment\u003C\/h4\u003E\n    \u003Cform class=\u0022comment-form user-info-from-cookie\u0022 action=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/3013\u0022 method=\u0022post\u0022 id=\u0022comment-form\u0022 accept-charset=\u0022UTF-8\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022form-item form-item-name form-type-textfield form-group\u0022\u003E \u003Clabel class=\u0022control-label\u0022 for=\u0022edit-name\u0022\u003EYour name \u003Cspan class=\u0022form-required\u0022 title=\u0022This field is required.\u0022\u003E*\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/label\u003E\n\u003Cinput class=\u0022form-control form-text required\u0022 type=\u0022text\u0022 id=\u0022edit-name\u0022 name=\u0022name\u0022 value=\u0022\u0022 size=\u002230\u0022 maxlength=\u002260\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022form-item form-item-mail form-type-textfield form-group\u0022\u003E \u003Clabel class=\u0022control-label\u0022 for=\u0022edit-mail\u0022\u003EE-mail \u003Cspan class=\u0022form-required\u0022 title=\u0022This field is required.\u0022\u003E*\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/label\u003E\n\u003Cinput class=\u0022form-control form-text required\u0022 title=\u0022The content of 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