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id=\u0022comment-78748\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/78748#comment-78748\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Lawliet\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Lawliet\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Lawliet\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Lawliet\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/78748#comment-78748\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EWhat if it\u0026#039;s us \/ ignoring\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003ELawliet (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Tuesday, 31 May 2016  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/why-you-always-date-wrong-person\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHey Chase,\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAs I read the article, I kept thinking, \u0022What if we have trust issues?\u0022\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nMemories about past self, how I was skeptical.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nThen advice reflecting your \u0022Elliot Roeger\u0022 article pop up.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nIt\u0027s mental mindset issue,  Thanks for that article.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI do however still find myself more happy when others smile at me, and work harder (especially employers smiling at me), makes me warm inside.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nNot sure if this is a problem or not, but I dislike the lack of control (reliant on others smile to brighten your day...not that extreme, but it does make me feel warm inside)\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EDid you have similar experiences?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ERe: Ignoring \/ bored face\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ENow we know about that facial expression is powerful and ignoring unhelpful things to keep things going the right direction.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut what if someone uses these on us?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhen people ignore us, say we ask a question, and they completely don\u0027t reply, what do we do that save face or as a high value man?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI tried repeating again, in case they didn\u0027t hear (it happens).\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nIf they ignore again, I drop it (feels unpowerful)\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nI tried asking until they respond but they get annoyed\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nI tried talking continuously as if they replied and they get annoyed but it\u0027s hilarious! :)\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ELawliet\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/2043\/78748\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-79326\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/79326#comment-79326\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/79326#comment-79326\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EApproval, Someone Ignores You\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Wednesday, 15 June 2016  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/why-you-always-date-wrong-person\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/78748#comment-78748\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003ELawliet-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EDepends whether I respect the guy or not. If I respect him, his\napproval will motivate me. If I don\u2019t respect him, his approval turns\nme off (\u201cUgh, he\u2019s smiling at me\u2026 I must\u2019ve done something wrong\u201d), and\ndefiance fires me up (\u201cI\u2019ll show that asshole. I\u2019m going to leave him\nso far behind he\u2019ll think the only possible reason is he\u2019s a victim of\ncircumstances\u201d).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EDon\u2019t repeat yourself. If someone doesn\u2019t respond, rephrase the\nquestion. If they don\u2019t respond again, shrug and talk to someone else.\nOr demand compliance:\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Cp\u003E\u003Cspan style=\u0022font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 153);\u0022\u003EYou:\u003C\/span\u003E\nSo, where you\u2019d get that hat?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u003Cspan style=\u0022font-weight: bold; color: rgb(204, 51, 204);\u0022\u003EHer:\u003C\/span\u003E\n[no response]\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u003Cspan style=\u0022font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 153);\u0022\u003EYou:\u003C\/span\u003E\n[pointing] That hat, it\u2019s nice. What\u2019s the origin?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u003Cspan style=\u0022font-weight: bold; color: rgb(204, 51, 204);\u0022\u003EHer:\u003C\/span\u003E\n[no response]\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u003Cspan style=\u0022font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 153);\u0022\u003EYou:\u003C\/span\u003E\nOkay, come here. Lower your head a moment. May I? [take her hat, check\nthe tag] Made in India? Ah, so that\u2019s why it looks so interesting. Good\ntaste.\u003C\/p\u003E\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBy this point she will either hate you, or she will be grinning at\nhow mighty your frame control is.\u003Cbr\u003E\n\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/2043\/79326\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-78942\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/78942#comment-78942\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022misterS\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022misterS\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022misterS\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022misterS\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/78942#comment-78942\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003Ewow!\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EmisterS (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Friday, 3 June 2016  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/why-you-always-date-wrong-person\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EI opened this article thinking - that sounds kind of boring - dating and relationships is not what im really into now.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThen I start reading, and it is really confronting. About the ways in which people with trust issues act and repel others. I definately am someone with trust issues. And clearly I could see how, what you said, happens in my life. It is like I was totally blind to all the ways in which the trust issues shine through before reading about them.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhatever caused these trust issues and defense mechanisms as a way of trying to protect myself. They have long outlived their usefulness.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI will definately try your cure TODAY of trying to \u0022fake it till you make it\u0022 with acting more open and trustworthy to strangers.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI guess in cold approach - getting into the flow kind of negates the negative effects of the trust issues.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYou always amaze me with the depth of your knowledge about humans. It is second to none.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThanks a lot\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/2043\/78942\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-79327\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/79327#comment-79327\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/79327#comment-79327\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ETrust Issues\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Wednesday, 15 June 2016  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/content\/why-you-always-date-wrong-person\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/78942#comment-78942\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EMisterS-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EGlad to hear it :)\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u2019ve seen numerous folks with trust issues abandon them over time. It\u2019s generally a process of piling enough positive experiences that the brain realizes most people aren\u2019t going to screw you over, plus taking enough care to not bring about those situations yourself (self-fulfilling prophecy: you suspect people of this or that, raise the paranoia in the relationship, drive them crazy, seed the idea repeatedly of them doing to you what you fear, and eventually it becomes a reality and your fear is \u201cvalidated\u201d \u2013 gotta break that cycle if you catch yourself in it and give people the chance to prove your suspicions wrong).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca 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