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id=\u0022comment-22664\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22664#comment-22664\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22664#comment-22664\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EHey\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Wednesday, 22 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EGreat article Chase really enjoyed reading (and learning!)\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESpeaking of mentors, how important do you think it is that the mentor is still active in whichever field he has expertise in?  You think it makes much difference if he\u0027s retired from his field or not?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOn that note, just out of interest how active are you at the moment in the world of seduction?  Do you still pickup women from clubs\/bars etc?  I only ask because I know on the forum you made a thread about monogamy and how it can work etc which made me think you might be in a solid relationship?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnyway my main question is:  How do I go about competing with those high energy, life and soul of the party, I have everybody\u0027s attention, joke cracking kinda guys?  I find it hard to get a girls attention from them.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThanks Chase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22664\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23161\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23161#comment-23161\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23161#comment-23161\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EActivity Levels\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22664#comment-22664\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EAnon-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI think the best things to look for in mentors are individuals who have some level of ongoing firsthand activity - even if it\u0027s mainly just doing basic stuff like shooting around if it\u0027s a guy coaching you in basketball, say - but also importantly, individuals who are regularly working with other pupils around your levels, because that\u0027s how a coach trains up his ability to identify missing pieces in others\u0027 approaches and give them targeted suggestions. I\u0027ve noticed that in seduction, for instance, guys who are both removed from the game for a few years (i.e., in exclusive relationships) and who do not work regularly with providing practical coaching to beginners start to become increasingly \u0022in their heads\u0022 and begin to give out increasingly speculative advice. It\u0027s important that a coach be getting feedback, either from doing the things he\u0027s suggesting you do himself, from hearing back from others he\u0027s coaching to do those things and what their results are, or, ideally, both.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ERe: me, bars\/clubs are still among my favorite places to pick up, even if I abstain from dating women I meet there. I rarely go out and burn it to the ground doing the \u0022approach 20 to 40 women\u0022 thing anymore these days, as I did during my prime learning phase (2005 to 2009 or so); I\u0027m good enough at identifying which women will be most receptive to me, and also attracting girls into me for easy meeting, that walking around and opening truckloads usually isn\u0027t worth my while any more. I\u0027ll occasionally still do it if I\u0027m feeling off or very out of my element and just am going to throw a lot of stuff at the wall and see what sticks, though. As far as relationships are concerned, I\u0027ve spent very little time being purely single since 2006... I nearly always have at least one solid or solid-ish relationship going on.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ERe: competing with the high energy guy, this article addresses this directly - check it out: \u0022\u003Ca href=\u0022\/content\/trouncing-male-competition-girls-dating-scene\u0022\u003ETrouncing Male Competition for Girls in the Dating Scene\u003C\/a\u003E.\u0022\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23161\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22665\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22665#comment-22665\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Danny \u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Danny \u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Danny \u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Danny \u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22665#comment-22665\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EDoes that mean we men can only date\/marry down?\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EDanny  (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Wednesday, 22 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EDear Chase, \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnother great article! I guess one of the most luckiest event in my life is to discover your site, purchased your ebook, and have you to be my mentor not only in pickups, but also in social dynamics \u0026amp;interactions. Again, thank you! \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI have a queation regarding to your previous 1950 Housewives article. Basically the message I received from u is that if we become a high quality alpha male which women desire (high income, high education, high status, good fundamentals etc), women will more likely to stay loyal to us. They are also more likely to be more feminine (adopt her role as a gentle housewife, mother, caretaker) toward us because high qualify men are not that replacable.  \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EMy question: Does that mean we men can only date down or marry down? We men can only date\/marry down If we want to have relationship control so our women can be faithful to us? What if I am interested in the same type of women as Chase Amante ,the women who are gorgeous and have a master\/ phD degree? \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf I am interested in women who have phD (Or in the process of getting her PhD) and I want it for a long term, does that mean I should get at least a master myself? How did u Chase Amante get high educated women and keep them in your previous relationships? \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThank you Chase!  Keep up the good work.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22665\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23162\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23162#comment-23162\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23162#comment-23162\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EDating\/Marrying Down\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22665#comment-22665\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EDanny-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ETo an extent it does, but the rules are pliable. \u0022Marrying up\u0022 in humans is expressed in women seeking more dominant, higher status males, and men seeking more attractive females (money problems are the number one cause of divorce [man not high status \/ successful enough]; and men and women are happiest in marriages where the woman is more attractive than the man, and both are less happy in marriages where the man is more attractive than the woman).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYou don\u0027t, however, need a PhD to date or marry a girl with a PhD; you just need to surpass her intellectually and\/or financially. And to sleep with her or have a fling with her, you often won\u0027t even need that; while she probably won\u0027t marry the pool boy, she might well have a fling with him, to enjoy his sexy abs (or whatever else he\u0027s got going on that\u0027s sexy about him).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAssuming successful, educated women find you inspiring, admirable, and powerful, they\u0027re usually not going to worry too much about what specific credentials you have. Much of my life has been spent dating women with more education than I have who make more money than I do who nevertheless view me as an authority because 1.) I know more than they do, and can hack my way out of all kinds of situations \/ provide solutions to all manner of things in the snap of a pair of fingers that they\u0027d otherwise never solve, and 2.) they view me as a guy with tons of future potential who\u0027s more or less destined for success \/ great things.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo, women DO marry up for status \/ wealth \/ power (just as men marry up in terms of looks... certainly all of my girlfriends have been bettering looking than me!), but what counts as status \/ wealth \/ power is a fairly broad range of traits and attributes, and if you\u0027re conditioning yourself to be an attractive, powerful, desirable man, you\u0027re generally going to score pretty well there.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23162\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22667\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22667#comment-22667\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22667#comment-22667\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EThis is excellent!\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Wednesday, 22 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EI love articles like this. Practical, real world advice. Chase, are you thinking about doing a in depth post about social awareness? I read your post about ultimate social calibration, but I was hoping you could write something a little more basic. Sorta like an idiot\u0027s guide to increasing your social awareness. I\u0027d appreciate it!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22667\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23163\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23163#comment-23163\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23163#comment-23163\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ESocial Awareness\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22667#comment-22667\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EAnon-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EDidn\u0027t have it on there, but I will add it to the topic queue!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23163\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22677\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22677#comment-22677\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/hector-castillo\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-5636-1662350368.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Hector Castillo\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Hector Castillo\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-5636-1662350368.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Hector Castillo\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Hector Castillo\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22677#comment-22677\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003E\u0026quot;How To Seduce A Mentor\u0026quot;\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/hector-castillo\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/hector-castillo\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EHector Castillo\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Wednesday, 22 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EChase,\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYou should definitely rename this \u0022How To Seduce A Mentor.\u0022 \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EHave something to offer the mentor? Don\u0027t whine? Nurture the relationship, because genuine connections can\u0027t be forced? Listen to the person; don\u0027t argue with them; *understand that person*, and reflect what it is they value?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAll of this sounds eerily familiar to other stuff I\u0027ve read on here ;)\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E- Anatman\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22677\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23164\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23164#comment-23164\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23164#comment-23164\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ERe: \u0026quot;How To Seduce A Mentor\u0026quot;\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22677#comment-22677\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EAnatman-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI very well could, couldn\u0027t I? :)\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe principles of human interaction are all the same... if you want to build a relationship with someone you know has value to you, but you also know is going to be skeptical about whether you will provide value in return (or just end up being another time sink \/ energy vampire), seduction is what you must employ.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThen all you\u0027ve got to do is make sure you hold up your end of the bargain, and it make it a rewarding experience for the one being seduced!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23164\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22678\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22678#comment-22678\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022B\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022B\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022B\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022B\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22678#comment-22678\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003Ea good eye opener\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EB (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Wednesday, 22 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EI found this site a while back and created an account on the forums just recently as a learning tool and to get some feedback here and there in the field reports section. In my spare time I was looking around the beginner forums and saw a couple unanswered posts. I felt I had some good ideas to contribute to these so I answered several of them. Soon after I got positive support from some other users saying that my advice was great. I even got a personal request for help in my inbox. This made me feel good about my involvement and contribution. And I went on a short stint answering questions, giving a good deal of feedback for a while feeling it was constructive. Today things felt like they were going over the top a bit. \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EReading this was very helpful. I don\u0027t want to overextend and fall into the \u201cIntermediate giving advice to beginners\u201d category. Also I understand if I wanted to give my own advice that is not covered in the articles then I should do it on my own website instead of someone else\u0027s. This article was eye opening and also motivated me to hit the field harder than ever.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22678\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23165\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23165#comment-23165\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23165#comment-23165\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EAdvising as an Intermediate\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22678#comment-22678\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EB-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIt\u0027s fine to give advice when you\u0027re intermediate - I did it, and most people on discussion boards do it and did it when they were at that point. That\u0027s fine. Where it gets tricky is if you take on \u003Cem\u003Eas a mentor\u003C\/em\u003E someone who is only intermediate; an intermediate guy can provide some good bits of advice here and there with situations he\u0027s already got handled or has pretty good instincts for, but he\u0027ll generally have a mental model that\u0027s missing a lot of other pieces and has a lot of holes in it, and taking on a mentor is basically about assuming someone else\u0027s mental models and copying them into your brain - which becomes all the more dangerous when you assume someone else is a pro and assume the model you\u0027re getting from him is complete and needs no revisions or improvements, when in fact it\u0027s only a partial model.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo, I\u0027d say - giving advice as an intermediate, on things you KNOW you\u0027ve got down, or else quoting a shared mentor or referring a learner to resources from an expert teacher, is fine and good and enhances both your learning and the person you\u0027re advising\u0027s learning; when I was intermediate I used to do TONS of \u0022Expert A advises that you [blank]\u0022 on things I wasn\u0027t personally that experienced with yet (and even today, I bow to research and other friends\u0027 experiences to bolster my own arguments or provide alternate views). Where you want to be careful is in giving advice on those things you aren\u0027t nearly as confident on - because once you venture into the realm of speculative or theoretical advice, that\u0027s when you start filling guys\u0027 heads with accurate-sounding stuff that leads them farther away from where they\u0027re trying to get to instead of closer.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23165\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22687\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22687#comment-22687\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022MarkO\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022MarkO\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022MarkO\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022MarkO\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22687#comment-22687\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EBusiness partner\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EMarkO (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Wednesday, 22 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EDo you have any tips on picking a good business partner? ... or do you need one at all?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EMark\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22687\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23166\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23166#comment-23166\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23166#comment-23166\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ERe: Business partner\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22687#comment-22687\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EMark-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYes, absolutely. Whether you need a business partner depends on what kind of business you\u0027re trying to build, and how confident you are about your own abilities; I\u0027d probably advise everyone to run a small business on his own for a year or so before seeking a business partner, just so you aren\u0027t going in a complete business newbie and making dumb mistakes. You\u0027ll also have a far better idea about what precisely you need a business partner to do.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EFor actually selecting a partner, I\u0027d advise picking someone who is NOT a close friend, and whom you avoid doing too many \u0022friend-like\u0022 things outside the business even once you\u0027re working together, to make sure the relationship stays mostly business (easier to make the hard decisions this way).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u0027d also advise picking someone who is a complement to your natural (most desired) abilities, and who wants nothing to do with the parts of the business YOU want, and EVERYTHING to do with the parts of the business you have no interest in. So, if you really want to be a CEO, and the other guy really wants to be the CEO, don\u0027t be partners, because one of you is going to get miffed and start phoning it in. Instead, find someone who wants nothing to do with the spotlight and instead wants to build whatever you want to build.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EA shared vision is also extremely important - if you want to get VC funding, build something up in a few years, then flip it for a big payout, but your partner wants to bootstrap the business and build it up into a business empire that he runs for 40 years, you\u0027re going to have BIG problems on all sorts of fundamental decisions about how the business grows and changes, and, again, will probably end up with someone checking out pretty early.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ELast one is contracts: it\u0027s very, very, very important to contract in the \u003Cem\u003Especific\u003C\/em\u003E duties each person has to the business. You need to assume that you\u0027ll be pouring your lifeblood into the business, and that the other person may NOT (even if he seems super excited), so you\u0027ve got to know what the bare minimum you\u0027re willing to accept from him is for him to get whatever amount of equity he\u0027s getting. Again, this is much easier if you already have a year of business experience or so, because you\u0027ll have a much better awareness of just how much work is involved in running a business (one of the huge mistakes I made early on was thinking I\u0027d be fine having even splits with business partners, but doing most of the work - \u0022Hey, they\u0027re my friends, and if they don\u0027t contribute quite as much, it\u0027s okay - I can handle it\u0022 - that changes pretty fast once you\u0027re breaking your back to build something and your partners are MIA 85% of the time). You also need explicitly clear exit \/ break up clauses - if one party will leave the business, what do the other partners do \/ how are his shares dealt with? If the business fails, how are its assets divided? Most businesses fail, and if you want to avoid a messy break up that destroys your relationship with your business partner(s), put it in writing and take all the emotion out of it before the emotion even has a chance to end up there.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe right business partner can be totally awesome; often though, that isn\u0027t the first person you run across, and it takes some prior business experience to be able to see who the right business partner is.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23166\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22703\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22703#comment-22703\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Empy\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Empy\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Empy\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Empy\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22703#comment-22703\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EA Small request\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EEmpy (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 23 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHey Chase. I love your and everybody\u0027s articles here. They really changed me for the better.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nBut I was wondering, how can I become a good mentor.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nI have a few friends who want to learn to play the guitar from me. Some also want me to teach them with girls, and since i amassed a whole load of skills, there goes a good amount of friends who also want to learn those skills.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nI know the basics of teaching: Show him this show him that, but is there something more to it? Something that really shows results?\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nThanks in advance!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22703\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23167\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23167#comment-23167\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23167#comment-23167\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ETeaching\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22703#comment-22703\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EEmpy-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ETeaching\u0027s amazingly simple if you just use one magic trick: start giving people things to do that are right at the boundaries of their current abilities.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo, if you\u0027ve got a friend who wants to learn guitar, and he knows nothing about it, start out by showing him some simple strumming techniques and tell him to go practice strumming for 3 hours over the next 2 or 3 days. When he comes back, listen to his strumming, ask him how it feels, give him some feedback, and give him his next assignment (probably more strumming).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESame deal with girls - if a friend wants to do better with girls, give him tasks similar to what I\u0027ve got up in the \u003Ca href=\u0022http:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/boards\/viewtopic.php?f=13\u0026amp;t=34\u0022\u003ENewbie Assignment\u003C\/a\u003E on the discussion boards, one day at a time, and have him report back and help him analyze and give him feedback if you were there and watching him.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EJust keep giving people things to do that will challenge them and push them, and so long as they are doing them, they will learn.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23167\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22706\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22706#comment-22706\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22706#comment-22706\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003Edo you make tours\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 23 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHey chase..\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EGreat article on mentoring. I always wondered if you ever did tours would be a great opportunity to meet and learn from you in person.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\n Also i  had a few questions.Read your articles on texting but i felt though it covered the content it didnt involve in depth discussion on timing of the texting. Because a lot of time my bad sense of timing has either got a girl auto-rejecting me or my over eagerness has lost me great deal of attraction. I mean i am not intutive enough yet to know when to pause or when be immediete in texting whether it comes to getting a girl back or dealing with current short affair or handling a relationship.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22706\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23168\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23168#comment-23168\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23168#comment-23168\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ETours \/ Texting\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22706#comment-22706\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EAnon-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI don\u0027t do tours or anything in-person these days, no. I used to coach in-field back in the day, and maybe at some point we\u0027ll do tours or something similar in the future, but not before business is big enough that it doesn\u0027t require me to do a lot of the day-to-day anymore.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ERe: timing of texting, I\u0027m not entirely sure what you mean \/ what specifically is wrong with your timing (e.g., waiting too long to respond to girls or responding too soon? Or, sending date requests or conversational texts at inconvenient times? etc.). If you want to clarify in a comment response here, if it\u0027s something I can do an article on, I\u0027ll add it to the queue; or, if you have specific examples you want feedback on, if you post on the \u003Ca href=\u0022http:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/boards\/viewforum.php?f=26\u0022\u003EPhone Calls and Texting Board\u003C\/a\u003E on our discussion forum, there are a lot of very sharp guys with texting there who can probably give you some nuanced feedback on what they see that you can adjust.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23168\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22708\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22708#comment-22708\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Torus\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Torus\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Torus\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Torus\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22708#comment-22708\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EMentor good at one thing, but wants to teach you an other\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003ETorus (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 23 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EThis article comes at the perfect time! I have been soaking up information from Masters in a similar manner. (Could it be you have posted similar ideas a year ago?)\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EMy Question:\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nI just met an old and retired, but curious and successful happy man.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nWe talked for half a day, exchanging life stories. He has mentored 7 people in his life, from artist over bureaucrats to doctors and now he got interested in me.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EHe is really good at social skills, is also at home at high society events and knows how the big decisions are made. He is also really happy. That is what I want to become better at.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe problem is that he advised me to go back to University to finish my high status medical degree, whereas I concluded that I can have a much bigger impact on humanity when advocating necessary technological change in the next 30 to 50 years. I know what I am doing, since I learned about these technologies from the best in the world.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EHe (like many people form other fields) had a hard time seeing the benefits of this approach and would like to see me on a more conventional path to success, whereas I want to learn his social skills to carry real science to the decision makers.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EHow can I tell him, that, without seeming to break #1 in your post?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnything else besides explaining it like I did here?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThank\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22708\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23171\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23171#comment-23171\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23171#comment-23171\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EConflict with Mentors\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22708#comment-22708\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003ETorus-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAssuming this isn\u0027t a major part of your usual conversations, the easiest way of dealing with mentors giving you advice you know you don\u0027t want to take is to ask them questions about it, like, \u0022Hmm. Why do you think medical school, where I\u0027d make more money but influence far fewer people, is the better path to technology advocation?\u0022 He\u0027ll then go into his points about why he thinks the one is better than the other. \u003Cstrong\u003EVery important to not get into a debate here\u003C\/strong\u003E - this is about values, and if you communicate that something as important as how you want to spend your life differs markedly from how he thinks you ought to spend it, that\u0027s a potentially mentorship-ending value clash.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAfter that, take his counsel, and thank him for it. Then just don\u0027t talk about it again unless he brings it up. If he does, either tell him you\u0027re still deciding, because it\u0027s a hard choice and there are very different reasons to go in either direction, or that you\u0027ve gone the path you\u0027ve gone but maybe you\u0027ll realize it was a mistake and end up on the other path a few years down the road and he\u0027ll turn out to be right.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EComing from the perspective of someone who\u0027s been both mentor and mentee a number of times, I can tell you that minimizing it helps, but it still puts a damper on your relationship with most mentors unless the guy largely forgets about it \/ you successfully avoid letting it ever become a big issue and broom it when it comes up; from the mentor point of view, when you\u0027re advising a guy to go do something you think is going to be critically important for his life, and he doesn\u0027t listen and goes and does something else but keeps coming to you for advice, the feeling you get is something like, \u0022Why are you still asking me for advice? It\u0027s clear you only want the small pieces of unimportant advice, and on the big, most important issues, you\u0027re going to go another, less effective, mediocre route.\u0022\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EKeep in mind that mentorship isn\u0027t free - someone who trains you in something generally trains you in it because he wants you to use it in a specific way. Mentors \u003Cem\u003Ereally\u003C\/em\u003E don\u0027t like their advice being used in ways that clash with how they intend them to be used, so if this guy thinks you\u0027ll be doing a lot of good in medicine and throwing that away in technology, that might just be a dealbreaker for him working with you.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23171\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22711\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22711#comment-22711\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/gijas04\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022gijas04\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022gijas04\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022gijas04\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022gijas04\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22711#comment-22711\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EA Mentor As A Beginner\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/gijas04\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/gijas04\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003Egijas04\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 23 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI came across a strange situation where as a beginner myself was giving advise to another beginner. I didn\u0027t really feel like I had to but he was chasing this girl and I had to say something. I told him to stop and let it go. I\u0027ve been there myself and it doesn\u0027t work. He kept asking questions as if I was a mentor. But after reading your article it makes sense. We are both beginners so we are on the same level. However, I seem to know more about the subject since I have been out in the field longer and I am also 15 years his senior. So I see were he needed advice from me. And I was happy to give it to him. It made me feel good. I do feel I need a mentor myself but like you suggested until I start seeing success regularly on my own, I will need to work hard to be at a place where I can finally say, yes, I need a mentor now to advance to the next level. Thank you Chase for your insight!\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nJason\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22711\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23172\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23172#comment-23172\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23172#comment-23172\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ERe: A Mentor As A Beginner\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22711#comment-22711\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EJason-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYeah, it\u0027s tricky when you know some things that seem very insightful to other people but aren\u0027t really \u0022there\u0022 yet yourself... they\u0027ll tend to think you\u0027re an expert and start bombarding you with all manner of questions, which you\u0027ve got to be careful you don\u0027t let get to your head and make you start giving out speculative advice because it feels good to seem like an expert. Best here to just say, \u0022You know, honestly, I\u0027m still just starting out too and I don\u0027t have much experience with that yet, so all I can say is go try out a few different things and see which ones work best.\u0022\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo long as the advice you\u0027re giving out is either stuff you know personally through and through, or that you\u0027ve gotten from an expert you trust (and you\u0027re just repeating it as you got it, and not drawing too many conclusions off of it), you\u0027ll usually be fine.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnd absolutely - reaching that initial plateau first makes it all the easier to get a mentor later, and get the \u003Cem\u003Eright\u003C\/em\u003E one, at that!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23172\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22712\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22712#comment-22712\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Jay1\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Jay1\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Jay1\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Jay1\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22712#comment-22712\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EA much needed article\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EJay1 (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 23 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EGreat column, Chase. I think this one was long overdue, and it\u0027s great to see you tackle this subject so well. For any successful endeavors I\u0027ve taken in life, I\u0027ve looked to and found help from a mentor. Having a mentor is not only critical in many fields, but I think it\u0027s underrated since many men don\u0027t want to take a subordinate role and think they can handle things on their own. Having the humility to accept that you can learn from someone else is one of the greatest thing I have learned in life. I now listen to others more than ever in my life, and it has been immeasurably beneficial to not only my career but my life in general.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EA while ago, I asked if you were going to do an article about relocating to a new city and starting anew somewhere. You mentioned you did a piece on living abroad, but I was curious when you\u0027re going to do one specific to a city within one\u0027s own country (the U.S., in my case) and the ins and outs of starting anew, rather than adjusting to a new culture as that other article was more focused on.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESorry to keep bothering you about this article, but I really want to get your take on this, brother. You\u0027re one of the people who I listen to on a regular basis and have learned quite a lot from.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThanks again.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ERegards,\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nJay\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22712\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23173\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23173#comment-23173\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23173#comment-23173\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ENew City\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22712#comment-22712\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EJay-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ECool to see how much having mentors is impacting your life. It\u0027s pretty astonishing both 1.) how big a differences these make, and 2.) how few people tap into using mentors purely because of ego reasons, and end up stalling their own progress out.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnd, noted on starting up in a new town in one\u0027s own country - I\u0027ll see what I can do. That\u0027d be a fun one to write.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23173\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22713\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22713#comment-22713\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22713#comment-22713\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EON and OFF modes\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 23 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EI feel myself having a mindset deficit and maybe you can shed some light.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nMy end goal is to be a confident operator wherever I go and with whomever I interact, whether it\u0027s new women, a new job, a new country.  The confident operator finds solutions to his problems and acts without hesitation or doubt to get what he wants.  Sometimes his desires might be considered a little psycho because he dreams big and expects big.  But the difference between him and the frustrated entitlement guy is the confident operator has the ability to ACT in ways that impact people\u0027s emotions in the ways he needs in order to shape their behavior toward him and in turn get what he wants via frame control and other means.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EProblem I face is, I know the end goal in theory, what it looks like if someone is doing it in front my face, but I just don\u0027t know how to get there in automatic visceral fashion at ALL TIMES.  I feel like my confidence is conditional.  If I feel good on a certain day, say I had a few successes early in the morning  then I\u0027m primed to go risk take and say hello to 5, 10 girls that day and persist hard.  Or I\u0027m primed to speak up in meetings and throw out wild ideas without worry about being judged\/ostracized.  These are the \u0022ON\u0022 days.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOn other days, that I categorize as the \u0022OFF\u0022 days, if I don\u0027t have that \u0022ON\u0022 feeling, that feeling that I can win or that I don\u0027t really care if I lose, then I hesitate.  I get intimidated more easily (say by superior performers in the environment). Instead of acting from my automatic unconscious, I become self-conscious, and doubt sets in, my heart pounds, I get nervous.  This feeling affects everything, from how I see the world (threats vs opportunities) including interactions with others.  But on the \u0022ON\u0022 days, I automatically inject wit, humor, banter, teasing, chase-framing etc into my conversations.  I remain emotionally detached from the outcome of conversations (with strangers), and I lead interactions and I try to be the bringer of the energy.   I lead interactions.  And if my conversational partner is boring, then I walk away and find another.  Rinse and repeat. \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOn the \u0022OFF\u0022 days though, that \u0022bringer of energy\u0022 state dramatically abates, and in order for me to bring out my true personality, one of two things must happen: a) the person has to be a master conversationalist and their energy and taking the lead (where I respond to their energy) warms me up from my hesitant, lukewarm state.  If they fail to be interesting, exciting, alluring, then the conversation basically ends and dies.  or b) I have to like the person.  If I am indifferent to their existence, then I view scintillating conversation with them as me having to expend more effort than I care to, so I remain quiet.  And if I don\u0027t like the person, they might as well be dead to me.  \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut why? Were you ever like this? Am I just an introvert? I dont get my emotional reactions to people on my OFF days... it isn\u0027t that I don\u0027t want to socialize at all on my OFF days, it\u0027s that if that uncontrollable uncofident, uncomfortable feeling comes in, then I don\u0027t want to be the LEADER of the interactions (at least not until I warm up), I just want to FEEL comfortable and respond to others...(and for me to FEEL comfortable takes interacting with a master conversationalist who can keep conversation going, and they speak in interesting ways to keep me engaged...otherwise I\u0027m like fuck it, don\u0027t need it). \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThing is, I\u0027ve observed some people seem to have the ability to just BE ON whenever the situation requires.  Everyday.  Immediately in response to questions they can dive in to master conversationalist mode.  They can be dominant and lead conversations, and just make things happen no matter who they\u0027re around and how they personally feel toward the individual.  Me on the other hand, I feel like I  can do it some of the time when I\u0027m in ON mode, but on my OFF days, my actions are much more tied to HOW I feel about a person.  My aggressiveness fades.  I have to LIKE the people I interact with FIRST to be able to bring any energy at all...and if I don\u0027t like them already then I need for them to warm me up first before I can bring out my real personality and do what I want.  If they can\u0027t warm me up then I just stay quiet and lukewarm.  Sometimes I\u0027m nervous, other times I\u0027m just distant and aloof.  I guess somewhere deep down I still want people to like me.  \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI don\u0027t know what the fucking problem is, but I want to be ON more than I\u0027m OFF.  And if I\u0027m OFF I want a way to be ON without having to rely on the unpredictable stochastic probability that a master conversationalist will be around to warm me up!  I mean how likely is that to happen? Is there a way to do this? To think my way out of feeling timid, reserved, hesitant? To do it on-demand? I guess a solution is just to get my legs moving and do what I need to do, despite my underlying emotions.  \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut on my off-days I become nonchalant, indifferent.  Not wanting to expend much energy.  Feeling rather lazy.  And this conditional aggressiveness, is a limiting situation.  Because say I need to inject sexiness into a conversation with a girl.  If I am in OFF mode, and I somehow ended up in conversation with a woman I\u0027d only be sexy if I really liked her.  If she\u0027s ok, meh, then no, my subconscious doesn\u0027t deliver a sexy routine to try out.  But this is boring!  If I\u0027m in ON mode on the other hand, then I\u0027m playful by default, so it doesn\u0027t matter all that much about my emotions toward her (most girls I meet don\u0027t really excite me anymore anyway, so my strategy has changed into me exciting them instead wating in vain for them to excite me) I naturally find a way to inject sexiness, even if I don\u0027t like her all that much.  I do it more for the thrill to see what I can get away with, not whether or not she\u0027ll go for it.  Whether it\u0027s by misinterpreting what she\u0027s saying, watching her with a sexy look, etc I don\u0027t care, I just do it.  \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo if you have any insights on how to think about hesitation, doubt, feeling cold and aloof in real-time, and how to interrupt it when it\u0027s happening to me (it happens often enough even though I don\u0027t want it to)  I\u0027d appreciate.  Aggressiveness is necessary when going after what you want, whether it\u0027s moving on a new woman or doing amazing things at work or somewhere else.  I can\u0027t be a victim any more.  So I figure I\u0027ll start with your help and try to develop some kind of mental model that I can deliberately practice when I feel OFF.  And the hope is that I slowly start interrupting negativity and start injecting positivity.  This way,  not only can I affect my homeostasis, but I get to keep the pressure on my desire to be a confident operator no matter where I go, whom I with, regardless of whether I feel intimidated or not, and no matter if I feel ON or OFF.  I know logically that there is no real risk to just doing what I need to do, but it just feels like there is a big damn risk.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThis is a rather long-winded message but those are my thoughts in summary (lol), so if you can mentor me a little I\u0027d appreciate.  Thanks!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22713\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22802\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22802#comment-22802\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22802#comment-22802\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EI know what you mean. I\u0026#039;ve\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 26 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22713#comment-22713\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EI know what you mean. I\u0027ve experienced higher highs but the tradeoff is lower lows. The lowers lows definitely prolong more than the higher highs, and I\u0027m reaching a point where my mind cannot remember and cannot act the way I want it to and I have no idea why. I\u0027m starting to think we go through cycles of moods and that what we think is our own doing is just awareness of a natural shift in mood.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22802\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23175\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23175#comment-23175\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23175#comment-23175\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ERe: ON and OFF modes\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22713#comment-22713\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EAnon-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThis is an interesting topic, and decides its own dedicated article; I\u0027ve noted down to do one on it. In the meantime, I can say that yes, everyone goes through this; personally, I found this frustrating early on, and so much of my training in anything I do (pickup \/ seduction \/ relationships \/ martial arts \/ negotiation \/ etc.) is centered around learning how to simulate \u0022on\u0022 in \u0022off\u0022 modes - that is, how to take the same actions in \u0022off\u0022 mode, how to assume the posture and facial expressions of \u0022on\u0022 mode while in \u0022off\u0022 mode, how to follow the same behavior patterns, etc.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhat ends up happening is you LOOK like you\u0027re \u0022always on\u0022, even when you\u0027re internally very \u0022off\u0022, and the results between \u0022on\u0022 and \u0022off\u0022 blur - for me, I tend to have better results when I\u0027m \u0022off\u0022 with most things I\u0027m trained at, since I\u0027m more consciously following an ironed-out process that generates results, than I do when I\u0027m \u0022on\u0022 and doing whatever I feel like doing because I feel great but often end up breaking process and not taking right action.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI talked about this somewhat in \u0022\u003Ca href=\u0022\/content\/going-out-meet-women-even-when-you-don%E2%80%99t-want\u0022\u003EGoing Out to Meet Women Even When You Don\u2019t Want to\u003C\/a\u003E\u0022, but I\u0027ll go into it more in-depth when I can get a proper article on it up.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBasically, the gist would be, \u0022Train to act AS IF you are \u0027on\u0027 EVEN WHEN you are \u0027off\u0027.\u0022 That requires some degree of awareness of when you\u0027re \u0022on\u0022 and monitoring of what you\u0027re doing differently than the rest of the time, when you\u0027re \u0022off.\u0022 e.g., maybe you notice you smile a lot more when on, so you start doing that when off, too; or, you notice you interrupt girls a lot more when on, so you start doing that in the same ways and at the same times in conversation when you are off - things like that. That\u0027s how you transfer the fleeting boosts that being \u0022on\u0022 gives you over into permanent upgrades that apply even when \u0022off.\u0022\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23175\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22718\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22718#comment-22718\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Dogan\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Dogan\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Dogan\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Dogan\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22718#comment-22718\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EAlways\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EDogan (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 23 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHey Chase,\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nYour acknowledge and style make me wonder to think about real world. You are bending the rules. You are not only sitting and writing, at the same time you are working, surveying in the field. Now I am addicted to your site. Thanks for having attitudes in this direction. \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EFirst I want to ask you. Why we(or I) can not reach the stability. Sometimes I feel like the world is mine!( usually When I have positive interaction with a female) and Sometimes I feel like the world is on my shoulders. I become to think what is wrong with me, what can I do, there must be something to be changed. But on my own temper, soul, brain. Nobody helps, shows me the way. Maybe I further ten times or looking my picture from hill or understand that I am fighting with mud ! \u0130f I could have a mentor.  \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u0130f you aren\u0027t find a high-caliber one to be your mentor. What is the right way to follow. Could your father be the best mentor?\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nI think I am in obligation to you\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nThank you.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22718\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23176\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23176#comment-23176\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23176#comment-23176\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EInconstancy\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22718#comment-22718\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EDogan-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe lack of never being satisfied enough is the human tendency toward acclimation. e.g., both lottery winners and victims of full-body paralysis return to the base levels of happiness they were at prior to their life-altering incidents within 18 months; if you were unhappy before winning the lottery, you\u0027ll be equally unhappy a year-and-a-half later; and if you were a bucket of joy before being paralyzed, you\u0027ll be a bucket of joy again in 18 months\u0027 time.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOn a shorter timescale, we adapt to most less dramatic chances in our lives (i.e., NOT winning the lottery or using the use of our limbs) far more rapidly. So, things that make you feel like you\u0027re on top of the world one day are no longer so exciting the next, and you get used to your new way of being and start to wonder what more you can have. This is what causes the \u0022grass is always greener\u0022 phenomenon; all non-depressed people are constantly in search of a way to have MORE and BETTER in their lives (and when you run into obstacles getting that, or it feels like you\u0027re stalling out, you\u0027ll get upset or beat yourself up over it).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhether your father could be your mentor is all about what he\u0027s good at and whether you want to be like him. If he\u0027s good at things you want to be good at and you admire him for the man he is, he may very well be an excellent mentor. Frequently, as you grow older, you\u0027ll begin to realize that you say and do things and behave like your father in ways you might never have expected you would previously.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23176\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22725\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22725#comment-22725\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22725#comment-22725\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ERight on\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 23 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EI\u0027ve used most of these methods in my life, somewhat instinctually.  They have worked incredibly well in getting a mentor and in skyrocketing my success.  Of course, I could not have explained them as eloquently as Chase, nor have I implemented every technique he suggests.  Please, everyone, DO THIS STUFF.  IT WORKS BETTER THAN YOU COULD EVER IMAGINE....just like everything else on this site.  Chase: You are a fucking genius.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22725\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22730\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22730#comment-22730\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22730#comment-22730\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EEye Contact\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 23 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EChase,\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nwhen someone wear glasses, it kinds of hide his eyes a bit...\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nif you have to do a deep eye contact, the glasses may\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nbe some sort of problem as it slightly hide your eyes.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nI just want your opinion.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22730\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23177\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23177#comment-23177\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23177#comment-23177\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EGlasses\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22730#comment-22730\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EAnon-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ECheck out this comment response for my thoughts on glasses: \u0022\u003Ca href=\u0022\/content\/reversing-poor-past-precedent-girls-you#comment-20980\u0022\u003ERe: Glasses\u003C\/a\u003E.\u0022 I wouldn\u0027t worry too much about deep eye contact specifically; assuming you\u0027re looking straight-on, it\u0027s still generally fairly easy to see your eyes. If you want to maximize eye contact, you could always take your glasses off in more intense moments, though I don\u0027t think this is necessary.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23177\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22735\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22735#comment-22735\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22735#comment-22735\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EBut I thought you were my\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Friday, 24 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EBut I thought you were my mentor ;)\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22735\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22759\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22759#comment-22759\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Wallflower\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Wallflower\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Wallflower\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Wallflower\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22759#comment-22759\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003Esleeping with your mentor\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EWallflower (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Saturday, 25 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EChase,\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo, do you think its ok to sleep with your mentor?  Provided that you want to sleep with this person genuinely and not because you want him\/her to help you necessarily.  I know this is a complicated question, but that is exactly why I am asking you., you are the expert on this stuff :))\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThanks much.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22759\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23179\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23179#comment-23179\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23179#comment-23179\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ERe: sleeping with your mentor\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22759#comment-22759\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EWallflower-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EHmm, tricky. I think it\u0027s pretty safe to say I\u0027ve served as a mentor to previous girlfriends of mine - I\u0027ve even trained some of them on picking up guys and relationship management! However, none of them I was a mentor to prior to ending up in relationships with them.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI suppose so long as the cost-benefit analysis seems okay, you\u0027re probably safe. The main things you\u0027d want to look out for are 1.) is this guy going to become weird after having slept with you and start withholding information because he wants to have more control over you \/ more dependence from you (which, unfortunately, many men do with women when they aren\u0027t confident they can keep the girl - knowledge is power), and\/or 2.) is there any potential for adding sex in the mix making things blow up between the two of you and destroying the mentoring relationship? Both of those are the real dangers you face.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOn the plus side, a sexual relationship with a mentor can also mean he becomes even more invested in and dedicated to your success, and it\u0027s pretty normal for opposite-sex mentors\/mentees to develop mutual attraction (a former lawyer of mine met his wife as one of the students he was mentoring in a class he taught; they ended up having children and forming a successful law practice together).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u0027d say, weigh the risks with what you know about the guy, and the worst case scenario; and if you still want to go for it, and you know the risks and are willing to take them, then go do it - life is short!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23179\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22760\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22760#comment-22760\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22760#comment-22760\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EChase,\nI\u0026#039;ve got a problem\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Saturday, 25 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EChase,\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nI\u0027ve got a problem here concerning cold approach.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nI\u0027ve cold approached a girl and it was like this:\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nMe: \u0022 Hi , I saw you and I had to come to tell you that.....\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nBut I stopped as she watched me like \u0027why the hell is that guy talking to me?\u0027\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nI lost confidence and did not know what to say.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\nhow should I deal with this kind of situation .I\u0027ve  read your post on\u003Cbr \/\u003E\n\u0022how to deal with rejection \u0022but  still could not find anything.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22760\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23180\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23180#comment-23180\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23180#comment-23180\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EDirect Approaches\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22760#comment-22760\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EAnon-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYou\u0027ve got to finish what you\u0027re saying. That\u0027s something that\u0027ll happen, especially with direct, time and again: you open the girl, start delivering your opener, she looks at you like you\u0027re an alien from outer space, and then you conclude with the compliment and introduction, and her eyes light up, she goes, \u0022Ohhhh!\u0022 and a big smile slaps itself all over her face. That opener is designed to confuse and off-balance a woman in order to build up the anticipation before the delivery of the compliment; it\u0027s why the structure works so much better (than, say, just running up to a girl and going, \u0022You\u0027re beautiful! I\u0027m Joe\u0022).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYou just need to finish your opener and communicate why you\u0027re there. Worry about rejection when a girl actually rejects you, and otherwise soldier on.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23180\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22765\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22765#comment-22765\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22765#comment-22765\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EPersonality type\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Saturday, 25 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHi Chase, I\u0027ve been thinking lately, what is your opinion on personality typing, namely those of the field of nlp? I know myers-briggs includes some dichotomies but then you see even more types which I\u0027m not even sure how they came up with. I\u0027ve never been a big fan of them but it\u0027s obvious that there are different personality types out there. What I\u0027m interested in is if there is actually a fundamental difference in the way different personalities are processing stimuli. Just from working on myself and analyzing other guys, I notice you can really spot the difference between an \u0022alpha\u0022 and a \u0022beta\u0022 male (let\u0027s just use modern day conventional standards to make things easier). It\u0027s a very different energy these two groups of guys give off - let\u0027s just say a beta is more submissive, quiet, warm, empathetic etc. and it\u0027s all expressed in body language from posture to voice tone. Alphas are dominant, lead and need less approval, have better posture and deep rich voices, but are less empathetic etc. It\u0027s not too far of a reach to say that betas are somewhat feminine. \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo through my whole transformation, I have definitely tried cultivating my masculine qualities. It has not been easy and some days I incur 180 degree shifts. So much so that I\u0027m wondering if I\u0027m experiencing some kind of switch in the way my mind is functioning, specifically relating to the internal and external frame category. The biggest difference I notice when I\u0027ve changed is that I am less nurturing and empathetic. I don\u0027t have feelings of love, connection, or attachment. Is it possible that people are born with personality characteristics like internal or external frames which lead to masculine and feminine behaviors and not that this is all sorted out in the social realm? Is it even possible to change your personality through and through and not just temporarily? I notice my game is completely different in these two different states, one is where I\u0027m extremely confident, dominant and entitled (one where I don\u0027t even \u0022game\u0022 in my opinion) and the other where I\u0027m more smooth and classically charming. I do feel more effective in the former state, but it is possible that it\u0027s due to perceived confidence. How would I even know if one is better than the other? \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u0027d also like to know if it\u0027s possible to make a permanent shift because it feels very strange going back and forth.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22765\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22835\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22835#comment-22835\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22835#comment-22835\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EI should add that my mind is\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Monday, 27 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22765#comment-22765\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EI should add that my mind is more hypersensitive to the environment and reactionary to others. I can hear my thoughts and breathing whereas when I make that shift I don\u0027t really care about the environment and the energy seems to be drawn towards me instead of the other way around. For this reason I am thinking maybe it is a cognitive process vs. just a difference in thought. It is possible though that the mind is focused on value and whichever state i\u0027m in it makes the necessary adjustments. \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOn a tangent, I have always wondered if it\u0027s beneficial to always be confident when speaking with others. It seems like there\u0027s a tradeoff between respect and dominance, and connection. I guess this is more related to non-pickup situations like when you\u0027re making small talk with a new guy. If he\u0027s not very confident himself, and you show too much value I feel like I give off a \u0022I\u0027m better than you\u0022 or a \u0022I\u0027m a rich snob\u0022 vibe like I\u0027m talking down to him even though I\u0027m not trying to. Some guys will either not feel a connection, feel threatened or just be jealous of you. Like attracts like, and don\u0027t \u0022nice guys\u0022 prefer other \u0022nice guys?\u0022 Obviously it\u0027s not a good idea to micro manage your personality, but how should we approach different personality\/status types?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22835\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23181\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23181#comment-23181\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23181#comment-23181\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ERe: Personality type\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22765#comment-22765\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EAnon-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI think the article that\u0027ll be the most insightful for the personality-switching \/ meshing with other personalities you\u0027re discussing is this one: \u0022\u003Ca href=\u0022\/content\/social-styles-tool-sales-and-seduction\u0022\u003ESocial Styles as a Tool in Sales and Seduction\u003C\/a\u003E.\u0022\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EPersonality typing is useful; Myers-Briggs has been debunked research-wise, and the woman who came up with it more or less drew it out of thin air. It\u0027s still fun to play around with, but I wouldn\u0027t base any major social decisions around using it\u2026 one of the major reasons I prefer Social Styles (and other similar systems) is because it\u0027s simpler - 4 categories, instead of 16.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ERe: whether it\u0027s possible to permanently change your personality, some aspects you can modify, though there are always core parts of \u0022you\u0022 that are unlikely to be modified (or impossible to, depending on what research you read). I for one can look back over how I\u0027ve changed throughout my life and see many noticeable changes; I can also remember all manner of thoughts and feelings I had as a 3-year-old that are pretty close to how I think and feel now. You change in some directions, but remain the same in others.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ERe: whether you\u0027re more effective in talkative mode or smooth mode (see this article: \u0022\u003Ca href=\u0022\/content\/3-flavors-sexy-brooding-smooth-and-talkative-vibes\u0022\u003E3 Flavors of Sexy: Brooding, Smooth, and Talkative Vibes\u003C\/a\u003E\u0022), the best thing you can do is track your results: phone numbers, dates, and, most importantly, new lovers and girlfriends - how many and how high caliber are the ones you get in each vibe? What are the differences between the two? You\u0027ll probably notice you end up with one kind of girl when you\u0027re talkative, and a different kind when smooth - which type is your preferred type (or do you like having a good smattering of both)? Once you have that information, you can make an informed decision about whether you want to steer yourself more toward behaving one way more often than you currently are (or train yourself to be that way most of the time).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23181\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22777\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22777#comment-22777\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22777#comment-22777\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EFlirting\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Saturday, 25 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EOne day a girl asked me \u0022Do i have anything in my hair?\u0022 and then she got her hair out of a pony tail, and stroked her fingers through her nice long soft hair in front of me... Is that a sign of flirting?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22777\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23182\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23182#comment-23182\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23182#comment-23182\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ERe: Flirting\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22777#comment-22777\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EA heavy one, yes.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EJust remember that flirting doesn\u0027t always = attraction she\u0027ll act on. So if you want to know if she\u0027s flirting because she wants you to move things toward the two of you being together, or if she\u0027s flirting because she wants male attention and validation and otherwise has no intention of actually \u003Cem\u003Edoing\u003C\/em\u003E anything with you, you must escalate the interaction (move her, ask her out, sleep with her, etc.).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23182\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22803\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22803#comment-22803\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22803#comment-22803\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EHi chase, is your book\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 26 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHi chase, is your book focused on inner game as well? Specifically regardingchanging beliefs.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22803\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23183\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23183#comment-23183\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23183#comment-23183\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EeBook Focus\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22803#comment-22803\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EAnon-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI focus (both here and in \u003Ca href=\u0022\/how-to-make-girls-chase\u0022\u003Emy eBook\u003C\/a\u003E) on changing beliefs through taking action and achieving results - e.g., you can pump up a guy\u0027s confidence all you want and tell him women love sex when he doesn\u0027t yet believe that and tell him he can conquer the world if he just believes in himself, but if he doesn\u0027t actually do anything with that information, once he\u0027s quit reading your stuff all that pump up fades away and he\u0027s right back where he started.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EFrom that point of view, I tend to think I do a better job straightening out guys\u0027 internals than any of the guys who focus on inner game specifically, because I\u0027m teaching you how to go out and methodically and systematically level up your results further and further, and that (results and success) is the single best and most dramatic \u003Cem\u003Epermanent\u003C\/em\u003E inner game booster there is.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOf course, I\u0027m biased ;) I might suggest asking guys on the \u003Ca href=\u0022http:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/boards\u0022\u003Ediscussion boards\u003C\/a\u003E for their thoughts if you want a second opinion from guys who\u0027ve read the book and applied it and can tell you how their own belief systems have changed.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23183\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-22911\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/22911#comment-22911\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/22911#comment-22911\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ECook\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Tuesday, 28 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EA wise man once told me that  the best way to a womans vagina is through her stomach. Is that true?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/22911\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23184\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23184#comment-23184\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23184#comment-23184\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ERe: Cook\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/22911#comment-22911\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EAnon-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI rarely cook for women, but have had a pretty strong batting average with it when I have... and I have it on good authority from others I respect that this can be an excellent path to bedroom acrobatics, yeah. If you aren\u0027t too lazy to cook, having a few good recipes you pull out to wow women\u0027s tastebuds can put them in the right mood to want to wow you in other ways, too.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23184\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23045\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23045#comment-23045\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Gem\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Gem\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Gem\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Gem\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23045#comment-23045\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EGaining Wisdom\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EGem (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Thursday, 30 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHey Chase,\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u2019ve been thinking about that response on external influence that you wrote. I found the thoughts really constructive and a paranoid part of me has been all this week keeping in mind that everything can influence me (so to take care and try to be aware as much as I can of all I take in). It makes sense that as you work to fix bigger parts of your life, you recognize where you are being influenced more (I know that a lot of the things I read about, take in, think about and do now, I find amusing in that if I were exposed to them even just a year ago it would be all so over my head and I would think \u201ceh whatevers I\u2019m gonna go play my trombone or play video games now\u201d).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI liked the Derek Sivers article you sent (and it was published that day!). I found it funny at first that you sent me to Siver\u2019s site because I\u2019ve been reading from his book reviews really intently the past couple months (but I found Siver\u2019s site after I bought Sebastian\u2019s book, which was after I found and read a lot from his site, which I found from How to Make Girls Chase; so I have you to thank indirectly for some great reading material I\u2019ve had the privilege of getting to read the past few months).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u2019ve read a great deal from Sebastian\u2019s site (really liked his book too, I found it particularly insightful); he is so actively embarked on progress and always working to make more progress. What I\u2019ve been wondering about here (as I continue to learn, work and grow) is that is there an age or an extent of time for older improvement-oriented guys, where after x threshold is crossed, you will not gain much more new wisdom? Do you forget wisdoms and lessons and then become reminded of them again after some instance or repeat happening; or maybe it is like weight training and after a certain point there are diminishing returns to progress further and learn more? I think you alluded to how part of learning more and knowing more is a cyclical process (and that you get to a point where you can know more and more but figure that it doesn\u2019t make much difference because you accept that you know a minuscule amount at the end of the day maybe a tiny step ahead of a small child), maybe that\u2019s the answer here.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ERegarding getting wiser, as someone becomes increasingly wiser, do they necessarily become more scattered and distracted (like a philosopher with his head in the clouds)? Sebastian\u2019s book Ikigai I liked a great deal, but the ideas presented in it were sort of scattered in this same way (and I think I see this with other people I like following or listening to). I find it happening to me now in class, day-to-day and with girls: I\u2019ll be distracted and always thinking about a new idea, or something I\u2019ve read about or written about (but then the time I do put into the class or task or girl is in contrast more focused, intense, raw and real). I think at a point you sort of learn to keep a grounded state on the exterior and speak your words in measurable doses from all you know and all you have to say stored in the bank (the outside is relaxed, but the inside is incessantly swimming with new ideas and possibilities; sort of like Girlschase how your own knowledge about seduction Chase might be so vast but what\u0027s written on the site is methodical, linear and given in healthy doses so that it can be relatable and effectively presented). \u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBy the way, I liked this article about mentorship. I\u2019ve always found that I\u2019d been that natural mentee type and good at finding mentors (and it helped cut the learning curve for me in many hobbies\/endeavors), however, I\u2019ve just newly been getting to understand that not everyone wants to be the mentor and some people just want to be the buddy to hang out with and have a beer with.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ERegarding the concept of \u201cwhen you are ready they will appear\u201d, I always suspected as I move through life and meet more people, travel to new places and gain more experiences, I\u2019ll come into contact with more people that share goals similar to mine and that can make good mentors or comrades. I\u2019ve followed people and read about people who\u2019re very into improving themselves but have not met anyone before who was as deeply entrenched in bettering themselves (don\u2019t mean this is in a boastful way more than most people aren\u2019t that crazy; friends of mine have tended to be very open\u2013minded and smart\/improve oriented people, just not knee deep stuck in it like me).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u201cWhen you are ready they will appear\u201d happened to me last week and I met a guy who\u2019s my age who got a job recently as a touring motivational speaker. It was funny and amazing for both of us because we\u2019d never met someone else as into bettering themselves as each other apparently. We got to talking and a few hours flew by as we discussed different stuff that we read, stuff we write about, people we follow, strategies for time management, scheduling, getting girls, eating healthy and a bunch other eccentric things that we do. Before this, the most I\u2019d talked to about interests such as these had been girlfriends who would be sweet and curious and open minded but not at that same level where they could give a lot back (just a level where I could enjoy sharing some bits with them).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAs you continue to raise your own value, friends like these are more the type that you should spend your limited time with right? And if your value keeps increasing are you doomed to find less people like this?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESorry for being so long-winded in this reply. Reading this article, I wanted to say how I really do appreciate the tips\/ideas\/suggestions you give and try to use them practically, and how I realize that I don\u2019t really report back to you all that much (and that it would be nice of me to do so; the mentor gets some satisfaction in return). I\u2019ll try to change this in the future and leave more responses and notes of my progress.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThanks,\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E-Gem\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23045\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23187\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23187#comment-23187\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23187#comment-23187\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EWisdom, Scattered Thoughts, and Finding Mentors\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/23045#comment-23045\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EGem-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThere\u0027s a lot in that comment!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYou get used to everything influencing you, and just accept that everything around you will put thoughts and ideas in your head, and just police it all more diligently. I\u0027m very careful about what\u0027s influencing me, and pay a lot of attention to mood, too - if I notice I\u0027m feeling bad \/ cynical \/ negative, I quickly sit and look at everything I\u0027m taking in throughout the day that\u0027s influencing me to feel that way, and start cutting out whatever it is that\u0027s creeped in and causing it.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhat you\u0027re talking about with being scattered you\u0027ll notice mostly on blogs, forums, or in talking to guys who\u0027ve been idea generators for a while, and it\u0027s part of the idea-formation process. So, when you have a guy who\u0027s actively putting together new ideas about the world (rather than someone who\u0027s improvement-oriented and just following what other people lay out rather than cranking out lots of ideas), when you\u0027re seeing his thoughts on a more regular basis, you get exposed to a lot of scattered \/ uncongealed thinking before it\u0027s been firmly plotted into a method. e.g., if you read GC these days, you\u0027ll hear me talk about sprezzatura and the Law of Least Effort and it\u0027s concrete and well-defined and fits into a certain position in what I teach. But if you were around me in 2009 or 2010, you\u0027d have heard me throw a lot of vague things out there about effort and investment and power dynamics and status and it would\u0027ve sounded scattered and confused.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EGenerally, guys who\u0027ve been at idea formation longer will tend to have more intellectual \u0022works in progress\u0022, and especially if they aren\u0027t actively making an effort to make things fit with canon and accessible to beginners, as I try to do with the articles on GC, it can look like an amalgam of all sorts of different things - which it is, since ideas come from other ideas being tossed up, diced to pieces, and then stitched back together and then (hopefully) tested for efficacy and real-world application. Whenever I have something new (or new-ish), one of the first things I do when writing it out in a GC article is ask myself, \u0022How does this tie in with canon, and where does it overlap nice and where does it potentially conflict?\u0022 I then work out the kinks to tie everything in and make it all less scattered, which also helps with me remembering the thing later and not forgetting it only to re-think it up later in slightly different terms, which is another thing you see with idea guys (periodically stumbling on the same idea again and again until they properly codify it and remember it).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThere is also a degree of staying grounded publicly, yes; there are certain topics that take a long time to put in grounded terms, and others that there just isn\u0027t a way to talk about openly without sounding like a madman or turning yourself into a pariah, even among people who \u0022get it.\u0022\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOn finding people you can learn from and gel with, it\u0027s been my experience that you run into these sorts of people more, not less, as you advance. Partly it\u0027s that you begin to recognize others like you more easily; partly it\u0027s that they begin to notice you too. I suppose it depends on how actively you are looking, though - if you\u0027re the sort who holes himself away in an apartment somewhere and rarely goes outside, you\u0027ll meet a lot fewer people like this than if you\u0027re the sort who goes out all the time, hosts parties and events, attends tons of others, and networks out the behind - I\u0027ve been both of those guys, and there is a difference. Getting out, and especially, going to places where you\u0027re more likely to meet interesting people, is important for this - the good news is, as you meet more interesting people, you\u0027ll tend to get more invites to more places that has them, and you begin to happen into new contacts almost accidentally that way. There\u0027s something of a snowball effect, particularly if you\u0027re active in looking for new people to meet.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23187\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23070\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23070#comment-23070\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Balla\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Balla\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Balla\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Balla\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23070#comment-23070\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EGet over feelings of chasing from the past\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EBalla (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Friday, 31 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHey chase, how did you and how do you get over the negative feelings of when you chased a girl? And I mean chased her the hardest you chased in your life, how did you get over it and how do I get over it?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe fact I chased the girl so hard in the past makes me think about the girl, its like a double edge sword.  Even though I get girls that look way better than her, I still think about the chasing I did and being the nice guy that I was.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIt kills me to think that I chased a girl that can\u0027t compete with any girl I talk to now and it kills me to know that I didn\u0027t get what I want with the girl I chased after.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThis part might be funny to you but I actually didnt chase as hard as you describe not to in your post. I actually was persistent and I would ask her out like once in a while.  But the fact I didn\u0027t succeed with this lower standard girl just makes me feel bad for being persistent with her when she wasn\u0027t a big deal. In my mind I feel if she looked absolutely stunning and never gave me play I wouldn\u0027t be angry about it because she looks good, but if she\u0027s lower average I feel like shit because she ain\u0027t shit.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBasically I want to know how does one get over the feeling of chasing a girl who isn\u0027t even stunning and not fucking her, and how did you get over the girl you chased the hardest? Thanks.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23070\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23189\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23189#comment-23189\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23189#comment-23189\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ERe: Get over feelings of chasing from the past\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/23070#comment-23070\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EBalla-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBest thing you can do about that in my mind is just laugh about it. I\u0027ll look back on girls I chased before, and will go, \u0022Ah, that was dumb.\u0022 You\u0027ll still have an emotional desire to conquer the girl there - that\u0027s a pretty natural human urge; to get closure, and leave as the one in power. All you can do is to accept that those emotions are irrationally tied to how much you chased, and NOT to the inherent value of the girl, and that it\u0027s just evolution playing tricks on your mind - then cut contact with the girl and not look back.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23189\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23075\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-anonymous well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23075#comment-23075\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/circle-guest-85x85.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Anonymous\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23075#comment-23075\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003EBreak down the wall\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EAnonymous (not verified)\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Friday, 31 January 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EHowdy Chase,\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E   I hope you can help me with a few insights into my situation. There\u0027s this girl in my social circle I\u0027m fond of (as in \u0027I love all those beautiful gals\u0027, not \u0027that one special girl\u0027 type). For more than a year we haven\u0027t been in touch often, then I met her again recently in a social circle meetup and found out that we\u0027re both going to visit and stay in her hometown in the upcoming days (different trips but same destination); so naturally I arranged for a meetup. Now, the plan is to turn on max sexy vibe and push for the lay that night (logistics look perfect, also happens to know she\u0027s lonely and single). The thing is, while I don\u0027t have a lot trouble getting sexual and flirting with other gals, every conversation I had with this one always feel emotionally-detached, like between us has no connection whatsoever. Even when I get her to share with me a lot of her personal, intimate experiences, it still feels like two zombies talking to each other. I don\u0027t know if it\u0027s personality clash or sth, but it frustrates me a lot, even a platonic vibe at least has some fun in it.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\n    I know I\u0027m probably fighting the odds here, but I see this as a good shot I can take, for learning experience at least. So is there a way I can fix the bad vibe between us and turn it into a sexual one?\u003Cbr \/\u003E\n    Thanks a lot ;).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23075\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022indented\u0022\u003E\u003Ca id=\u0022comment-23190\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022comment comment-by-node-author well clearfix\u0022 about=\u0022\/comment\/23190#comment-23190\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:Post sioct:Comment\u0022\u003E\n  \u003Cimg class=\u0022authortag\u0022 src=\u0022\/sites\/all\/themes\/custom\/girlschase\/images\/comment-author-1.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Author\u0022 width=\u002260px\u0022 height=\u002260px\u0022 \/\u003E    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022user-picture\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/all\/modules\/contrib\/lazyloader\/image_placeholder.gif\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003Cnoscript\u003E\u003Cimg typeof=\u0022foaf:Image\u0022 class=\u0022img-responsive\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.girlschase.com\/sites\/default\/files\/pictures\/picture-1-1492164307.png\u0022 alt=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 title=\u0022Chase Amante\u0026#039;s picture\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/noscript\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \n    \u003Ch3 property=\u0022dc:title\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/23190#comment-23190\u0022 class=\u0022permalink\u0022 rel=\u0022bookmark\u0022\u003ESexual Vibe with Non-Sexual Girl\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\n  \n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022submitted\u0022\u003E\n            Posted by \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:has_creator\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 title=\u0022View user profile.\u0022 class=\u0022username\u0022 xml:lang=\u0022\u0022 about=\u0022\/users\/chase-amante\u0022 typeof=\u0022sioc:UserAccount\u0022 property=\u0022foaf:name\u0022 datatype=\u0022\u0022\u003EChase Amante\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E on Sunday, 2 February 2014  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022content\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/article\/social-life\/how-find-mentor\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cspan rel=\u0022sioc:reply_of\u0022 resource=\u0022\/comment\/23075#comment-23075\u0022 class=\u0022rdf-meta element-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field field-name-comment-body field-type-text-long field-label-hidden\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-items\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-item even\u0022 property=\u0022content:encoded\u0022\u003E\u003Cp\u003EAnon-\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYou\u0027ll run into that with some girls - no matter what you do, they just don\u0027t seem to be able to turn on the sexual. That\u0027s fine - these are normally just very rational women who aren\u0027t as emotional as most girls are. They can be lots of fun as girlfriends or paramours... they\u0027re often quite different from the more usual fare you\u0027ll run into. Alternately, sometimes they\u0027re just women who haven\u0027t unlocked their sex drives yet and are just very emotionally out of touch.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe key with these girls is to not worry about the lack of a sexual vibe between the two of you, and instead just continue escalating touch and compliance. As you escalate these two, she\u0027ll become increasingly invested and increasingly comfortable with your touch, and you may even begin to trigger sexual feelings in her after all. At the very least, even if she fails to turn on at all, if she continues to go along with you as you ramp up compliance, you can eventually lead her to sexual intimacy sans emotion - you\u0027ll be surprised, but sometimes a girl you\u0027ve escalated things with but who\u0027s given you no indication of sexual desire for you will assent to your advances simply because she\u0027s rationally decided, \u0022What the heck. This guy seems cool - I might as well do it.\u0022\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EChase\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E      \u003C\/div\u003E\n\n  \u003Cdiv class=\u0022pull-right\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022links list-inline\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022comment-reply first last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\/23190\u0022\u003Ereply\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022text-center\u0022\u003E\u003Cul class=\u0022pagination\u0022\u003E\u003Cli class=\u0022active\u0022\u003E\u003Cspan\u003E1\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003Cli\u003E\u003Ca title=\u0022Go to page 2\u0022 href=\u0022\/ajax_comment_callback\/1311\/nojs?page=1\u0022\u003E2\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003Cli class=\u0022next\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/ajax_comment_callback\/1311\/nojs?page=1\u0022\u003Enext\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003Cli class=\u0022pager-last\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022\/ajax_comment_callback\/1311\/nojs?page=1\u0022\u003Elast\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/li\u003E\n\u003C\/ul\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n  \u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/dev\u003E\u003C\/dev\u003E\u003Cdev class=\u0022comment-form ajax-comment-form\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv id=\u0022comments\u0022 class=\u0022comment-wrapper\u0022\u003E\n  \n  \n      \u003Ch4 class=\u0022title comment-form\u0022\u003ELeave a Comment\u003C\/h4\u003E\n    \u003Cform class=\u0022comment-form user-info-from-cookie\u0022 action=\u0022\/comment\/reply\/1311\u0022 method=\u0022post\u0022 id=\u0022comment-form\u0022 accept-charset=\u0022UTF-8\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022form-item form-item-name form-type-textfield form-group\u0022\u003E \u003Clabel class=\u0022control-label\u0022 for=\u0022edit-name\u0022\u003EYour name \u003Cspan class=\u0022form-required\u0022 title=\u0022This field is required.\u0022\u003E*\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/label\u003E\n\u003Cinput class=\u0022form-control form-text required\u0022 type=\u0022text\u0022 id=\u0022edit-name\u0022 name=\u0022name\u0022 value=\u0022\u0022 size=\u002230\u0022 maxlength=\u002260\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022form-item form-item-mail form-type-textfield form-group\u0022\u003E \u003Clabel class=\u0022control-label\u0022 for=\u0022edit-mail\u0022\u003EE-mail \u003Cspan class=\u0022form-required\u0022 title=\u0022This field is required.\u0022\u003E*\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/label\u003E\n\u003Cinput class=\u0022form-control form-text required\u0022 title=\u0022The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly.\u0022 data-toggle=\u0022tooltip\u0022 type=\u0022text\u0022 id=\u0022edit-mail\u0022 name=\u0022mail\u0022 value=\u0022\u0022 size=\u002230\u0022 maxlength=\u002264\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022form-item form-item-homepage form-type-textfield form-group\u0022\u003E \u003Clabel class=\u0022control-label\u0022 for=\u0022edit-homepage\u0022\u003EHomepage\u003C\/label\u003E\n\u003Cinput class=\u0022form-control form-text\u0022 type=\u0022text\u0022 id=\u0022edit-homepage\u0022 name=\u0022homepage\u0022 value=\u0022\u0022 size=\u002230\u0022 maxlength=\u0022255\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022form-item form-item-subject form-type-textfield form-group\u0022\u003E \u003Clabel class=\u0022control-label\u0022 for=\u0022edit-subject\u0022\u003ESubject\u003C\/label\u003E\n\u003Cinput class=\u0022form-control form-text\u0022 type=\u0022text\u0022 id=\u0022edit-subject\u0022 name=\u0022subject\u0022 value=\u0022\u0022 size=\u002260\u0022 maxlength=\u002264\u0022 \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022field-type-text-long field-name-comment-body field-widget-text-textarea form-wrapper form-group\u0022 id=\u0022edit-comment-body\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv id=\u0022comment-body-add-more-wrapper\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022text-format-wrapper\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022form-item form-item-comment-body-und-0-value form-type-textarea form-group\u0022\u003E \u003Clabel class=\u0022control-label\u0022 for=\u0022edit-comment-body-und-0-value\u0022\u003EComment \u003Cspan class=\u0022form-required\u0022 title=\u0022This field is required.\u0022\u003E*\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/label\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022form-textarea-wrapper resizable\u0022\u003E\u003Ctextarea class=\u0022text-full form-control form-textarea required\u0022 id=\u0022edit-comment-body-und-0-value\u0022 name=\u0022comment_body[und][0][value]\u0022 cols=\u002260\u0022 rows=\u00225\u0022\u003E\u003C\/textarea\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022filter-wrapper form-inline form-wrapper form-group\u0022 id=\u0022edit-comment-body-und-0-format\u0022\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cinput type=\u0022hidden\u0022 name=\u0022form_build_id\u0022 value=\u0022form-nZVdBTzfI490vlBhC8GBH_PLIVdUSlQn-SdI2yMcu1w\u0022 \/\u003E\n\u003Cinput type=\u0022hidden\u0022 name=\u0022form_id\u0022 value=\u0022comment_node_story_form\u0022 \/\u003E\n\u003Cinput type=\u0022hidden\u0022 name=\u0022honeypot_time\u0022 value=\u00221779139534|6jfPFzeR2bXhvvsqiPKvmBC4omw-J20usR6wukugT3o\u0022 \/\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022form-item form-item-notify form-type-checkbox checkbox\u0022\u003E \u003Clabel class=\u0022control-label\u0022 for=\u0022edit-notify\u0022\u003E\u003Cinput type=\u0022checkbox\u0022 id=\u0022edit-notify\u0022 name=\u0022notify\u0022 value=\u00221\u0022 class=\u0022form-checkbox\u0022 \/\u003ENotify me when new comments are posted\u003C\/label\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv id=\u0022edit-notify-type\u0022 class=\u0022form-radios\u0022\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022form-item form-item-notify-type form-type-radio radio\u0022\u003E \u003Clabel class=\u0022control-label\u0022 for=\u0022edit-notify-type-1\u0022\u003E\u003Cinput type=\u0022radio\u0022 id=\u0022edit-notify-type-1\u0022 name=\u0022notify_type\u0022 value=\u00221\u0022 checked=\u0022checked\u0022 class=\u0022form-radio\u0022 \/\u003EAll comments\u003C\/label\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022form-item form-item-notify-type form-type-radio radio\u0022\u003E \u003Clabel class=\u0022control-label\u0022 for=\u0022edit-notify-type-2\u0022\u003E\u003Cinput type=\u0022radio\u0022 id=\u0022edit-notify-type-2\u0022 name=\u0022notify_type\u0022 value=\u00222\u0022 class=\u0022form-radio\u0022 \/\u003EReplies to my comment\u003C\/label\u003E\n\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cfieldset  class=\u0022captcha panel panel-default form-wrapper\u0022 id=\u0022bootstrap-panel\u0022\u003E\n          \u003Clegend class=\u0022panel-heading\u0022\u003E\n      \u003Cspan class=\u0022panel-title fieldset-legend\u0022\u003ECAPTCHA\u003C\/span\u003E\n    \u003C\/legend\u003E\n        \u003Cdiv class=\u0022panel-body\u0022 id=\u0022bootstrap-panel-body\u0022\u003E\n    \u003Cdiv class=\u0022help-block\u0022\u003E \u003C\/div\u003E    \u003Cinput type=\u0022hidden\u0022 name=\u0022captcha_sid\u0022 value=\u002233316324\u0022 \/\u003E\n\u003Cinput type=\u0022hidden\u0022 name=\u0022captcha_token\u0022 value=\u0022742d1035832b072bfcd69a500be4718b\u0022 \/\u003E\n\u003Cdiv class=\u0022form-item form-item-captcha-response form-type-textfield form-group\u0022\u003E \u003Clabel class=\u0022control-label\u0022 for=\u0022edit-captcha-response\u0022\u003EMath question \u003Cspan class=\u0022form-required\u0022 title=\u0022This field is required.\u0022\u003E*\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/label\u003E\n7 + 0 = \u003Cinput class=\u0022form-control form-text required\u0022 title=\u0022Solve this simple math problem and enter the result. 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